The Birth and Death of a god
by Awen Sofer
Summary: Sachiko would bear witness to the birth of a god-the god of justice. She wants to love him but doesn't know if she should. When Light's good intentions go awry and his sense of justice goes askew, the mysterious detective L steps in, threatening to destroy him. The woman who protected him in the beginning could be the harbinger of his doom, ushering in his end proving gods can die.
1. Part 1: In the beginning Ch 1

Hello, dear reader. This story is basically a rewrite of Sweet Seduction. I've wanted to do this for a while so I've decided to plunge ahead and get started. Hopefully, it will be better than the original, expanded and more detailed with less inconsistencies and a slower, not so rushed story line. I ask for your patience because the desire to write far outstrips my will to do so as of late. I'm using this as opportunity to not only improve my writing skills but to also get myself back into the habit of writing.

Please enjoy the story and tell me what you think. The first three chapters will be quite short, an extended introduction told from three different perspectives: Light, Sachiko, and Ryuk. After that, we'll all see what unfolds. Buckle up, my friends, and I hope you enjoy the ride. I'll do my best!

* * *

 _In the beginning..._

The grades for the first exam of the year had been posted this morning. At 7:58, Light Yagami stood in front of the bulletin board searching for his name. A smile, more of a smirk really, made the corners of his mouth twitch. As usual, being first on the list made his name easy to find. Top of the list. The cream of the crop. Always number one.

"Number two. Again. Dammit," a female behind him murmured aloud to herself.

He recognized the voice. His eyes moved to the name below his. Sachiko Sugiyama. A broad smile, full of pride and meanness, stretched his lips.

"I tried so hard," she sniffled.

Poor thing. She did indeed try hard. Throughout their second year, she stayed hot on his heels academically. One step behind, so close but yet so far. It appeared their third and last year would be more of the same. Doomed to be number two. Second best - always.

Although she chased after him in grades, she had never pursued him as a love interest like many other girls in the school. Her lack of interest in him romantically evoked a large amount of relief and a small modicum of respect from him. He would hate to break her heart in love too.

Sachiko Sugiyama possessed some extremely unsavory character flaws that appalled him. She often ran late and fell asleep in class. She never ironed her uniform. She was loud and spoke her mind. Sometimes with inappropriate words. Her mouse brown, naturally curly hair was frizzy and stuck out at all angles despite always being pulled back in a low ponytail. Light brown freckles dotted every visible inch of her light, almost sickly white, complexion. Her silvery gray eyes were her one redeeming physical feature.

Last year, a rumor had circulated around school that she had a 'thing' going on with the hot, young history teacher. After Christmas, that new teacher no longer worked at the school. Her grades in history took a nosedive after his sudden departure. Light could not have cared less if the gossip was the horrible truth or a pack of outrageous lies. He did not really think any more or any less of her because of it. He never thought of her at all.

To avoid having to interact with her or even look at her, Light eased off to the side as if making room for the next person to see their grade. Before he could make a full retreat, he felt a tug on the sleeve his jacket.

"Can I talk to you for a second?"

Damn. It. All.


	2. In the beginning Chapter 2

Sachiko pridefully resisted the urge to cry. After all, her greatest competition stood right in front of her. Of course, she doubted he saw her as any threat on the academic front.

This time, there was only a one point difference in their grades. It might as well have been ten points or twenty. One stinking point. But whatever, it was still another failure in her eyes. She found her struggle for the number one spot so damn frustrating. No matter how hard she tried, she could not surpass him.

She glared at the back of Light Yagami's perfectly styled head. Not a strand out of place. Hair the color of dark amber honey and the same color as his eyes. A color that should have indicated warmth and sweetness. His eyes were cold and unfeeling yet could burn a hole straight through her without ever seeing her at all.

Everything came so easily to him. He barely took notes. Rather than pay attention to lectures, he daydreamed during class. Lost in his own inner world and obsessed with his self-centered musings no doubt. However, when dragged away from his delusions back to reality by the teacher, he always managed to have the correct answers.

All of the girls in class were enamored with him. How could they not be in love with him? Amazing good looks and smart too. They called him the strong, silent type. She called him an arrogant, elitist who thought far too highly of himself. He was the firstborn son of the police chief for god's sake, not royalty.

But then again, he was inadvertently the handsome Prince of the high school. She believed he secretly enjoyed the attention. The girls adored him. The boys envied him. The teachers showered him with praise and adulation. It was a miracle his head still fit through the door.

All she wanted was to show him that no matter how good he might be, there was always someone better. But she could not do it.

Light stepped to the left, catching her attention. Before she could stop herself, she reached out to grab his jacket sleeve. The material felt stiff from being starched and pressed.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" she asked. She completely expected him to snatch his arm away from her and walk away despite her polite request.

To her surprise, Light turned to look at her. His eyes met hers. The directness of his gaze stunned her into silence.

"Yes?"

"Congratulations on being number one. Again," she added not caring if he heard the sarcasm.

"Did you want something?" he inquired impatiently.

"Uhm, would you..." She hesitated, embarrassed by the question she wanted to ask. "Would you c-consider tutoring m-me?"

For a second he appeared amused, and she feared he might burst out laughing at her. Her chest tightened and heat rushed up her neck to her face. Embarrassment threatened to throttle her when his face transformed to stone again. She wished she could disappear into nothingness, to once again slip off his radar but his eyes refused to stray from her face. He appeared to be offended that she had dared to speak to him.

"No," he replied curtly.

"Why not?" she asked, anger eradicating her humiliation.

"You don't need a tutor. You get good grades," he said, turning on his heel to walk away from her.

"Yagami, please," she begged. "Maybe I just need some study tips. Some ideas to make it easier to retain the information. I-I don't know. It's just...it's just so difficult for me. And easy for you."

"What's wrong with having to struggle for something you really want?"

Sachiko's palms itched she wanted to slap him across the face so badly.

"Are you stupid? Are you lazy?" he plunged ahead insultingly, still staring directly at her.

Her fingers curled into a fist. Slapping him would add an element of humiliation, but full out punching his beautiful face would be so satisfying.

"I know without a doubt the answer to the first question is no. I'm not sure about the second, but I would venture a guess that one is a no too. Despite the fact you occasionally fall asleep in class," he added with a touch of venom.

"No. I'm not lazy. I just - " She stopped herself before she told him about her part time job. Students were not allowed to have part time jobs, and she could get expelled. Besides, it was none of his business. She did not want to give him another reason to look down on her. Hauling in a deep breath, she rolled her eyes. "Never mind. I'm sorry I asked. See you in class."

Sachiko hugged her books to her chest and hurried off to the girls' restroom. She wanted to splash water on her face to wash away the shame before she had to go sit beside him in class. Her desk was positioned right next to his. Oh, god! Everything about high school was too damn hard.


	3. In the beginning Chapter 3

Things are not always what they seem to be. This statement applies to people and situations alike. People make assumptions based on their on own prejudices and life experiences. Just as the eye can be tricked so can the mind. Life in general and people specifically should not be viewed in stark black and white. There is a whole spectrum of gray in the human experience to consider.

Then there are those who do not care about the nuances of being human. Light Yagami judged harshly and quickly. He chose to see only the definites, what he believed to be the cold, hard facts in plain view, before drawing a conclusion about people. Being stubborn prevented him from backing down on his opinions. Being a narcissist would not allow him to admit, even to himself, when he was wrong.

Ryuk cackled happily to himself. He believed he had finally found a human interesting enough to be worthy of his Death Note.

The mischievous shinigami had been bored and looking to stir up something in the human realm. One could never predict how these humans would act. With such a wide range of emotions, they could be endlessly entertaining in their unpredictability.

Ryuk had been observing two particular humans for a little while. The boy and the girl both were equally ambitious, driven, and unafraid to do what it takes to get what they want. However, they greatly differed on their methods of accomplishing their goals.

The boy, self-serving and competitive, naturally brilliant and handsome, kept to himself and accomplished everything all on his own. There was truth to the girl's words. Everything did come easy to Light Yagami. He was also loathe to show weakness or ask for assistance should anyone have the opportunity to be given a shred of credit for his success besides himself.

The girl, however, was his complete opposite. She asked for help when she needed it. Tutors and extra credit work enabled her to keep her grades up. She spent hours in the library, reading and researching. Humbling herself to ask Light for his help had not been easy for her, but she had done it in her desire to become better.

The gossip mill had been totally wrong about her involvement with the history teacher. He was a student teacher who tutored her. He also became her savior when he assisted her with getting a part time job and a place to live to escape her guardian, the uncle who had sexually abused her for years. When the rumors could not be quashed and revealing the truth would be even worse for the both of them, the teacher had resigned willingly to spare them.

The girl worked hard at school and her job. She took her books to work with her to study between batches of bread dough rising or cookies baking. Sometimes it was nearly impossible to focus her eyes and form a thought at four in the morning when she had not gotten to sleep until midnight.

However, Sachiko was too soft-hearted, too kind. She formed opinions about people slowly and was willing to change them upon getting to know a person. She cared. And that was what made her weak. She was the wrong choice for his little experiment in human behavior.

Ryuk greatly enjoyed observing her interactions with Yagami so he continued to keep her in his sights.

The boy, however, showed exceptional promise. The seeds of a god complex had already started to sprout and grow in Light's heart. Believing oneself to be a god on earth is so very important to being a holder of a Death Note. After all, only gods of death were supposed to possess the notebook. Light held the potential of being a spectacular human Shinigami; calculating and indiscriminate, suffering no guilt from doling out death sentences.

Ryuk leaned forward, teetering on the edge of the rocky outcropping where he sat in the bleak Shinigami Realm. His bulging red irises followed the white square of paper that the boy slid onto the girl's desk.

The sweet girl with the wild brown curls pulled back into a ponytail sniffed as she unfolded the note. She had been proud enough to go to the bathroom and cry, then rinse away the tears before entering the classroom like nothing had happened. The shinigami admired her just a little for that show of poise. Humans could be so intriguing.

Ryuk silently read the note along with her.

 _If you really want me to tutor you, come to the library tonight at 8._

"Well, well, Light," he snickered in amusement. "Aren't you a nice guy?"

No. Not really. Ryuk knew there was not an altruistic bone in Light Yagami's body. He had no idea what the boy was thinking, what his angle could be. What could Light possibly hope to gain from the girl? His reasons were his reasons alone, but Ryuk meant to find out his hidden intentions. He would observe a little longer before dropping the notebook, but he had already decided who would receive the Death Note.

"Humans can be so very interesting. Isn't that right, Light?"


	4. Chapter 4: Getting to know you

Rather than making lots of short, choppy chapters, I've switched viewpoints between characters within a single chapter putting a symbol in between to indicate a change. Hope you like the new chapters!

* * *

Sachiko drummed the eraser of her pencil on her yellow legal pad. She had just completed her fifth page of notes when she checked the time on her phone. 8:07? Light should be here by now. What could be -

"Oh, no," she gasped.

Her pencil instantly ceased beating the nonrhythmic tune inspired by jangled nerves. A revelation hit her like a punch in the face. No, he was not late. He is _never_ late.

Had he stood her up? Being a no show was not his style either. Ghosting her would be bad decorum, not good social form. He was better than that. However, he was not better than shifting the blame. He was going to make this her fault!

She jumped up from her chair, nearly knocking it over. She hurried for the door using a speed walker's gait. Not caring how strange she looked, she ignored the befuddled and amused faces alike on her way. Passing a very concerned librarian at the front desk , she pushed open the unlocked side of the double entrance doors to the building.

"Son of a bitch," Sachiko muttered to herself upon seeing the familiar and impeccably styled back of his head.

There he stood on the top step impatiently glancing at his watch. Tight assed and incredibly proper as always. Casual dress to him meant ironed khaki slacks, a plaid shirt in shades of dark brown, tan, and black (tucked in of course) and polished dark brown deck shoes. He appeared to be prepared for a date rather than a study session at the library. He started to descend the steps.

Why in the hell had he even slid that note to her offering his tutoring services if he was going to pull a silly stunt like this? Maybe he wanted to humiliate her, to remind her that she belonged one step behind him. She knew he believed she did not deserve to stand beside him and would certainly never be worthy of being in front of him. But it wasn't personal. He believed he was better than _everyone_.

"Hey," she hissed so venomously the sound made him stop in his tracks. "You said it yourself I'm not stupid so where do you think you are going?"

Light turned around abruptly, his brown eyes huge and round as dinner plates before they narrowed into slits of anger.

"You're here," he stated rather than asked, not bothering to hide his annoyance.

Sachiko stepped out onto the wide, column lined portico spanning the full width of the front of the library. When the door closed with a thunk behind her, she snapped, "And you're an asshole, Light Yagami."

"Positively poetic with your choice of words as always, Sugiyama," he sneered, his disapproving eyes giving her a head to toe once over.

"You were going to stand out here for ten minutes, officially declare me late, then go home weren't you? You had no intention of coming inside to check if I was here because you wanted to blow me off," she accused, receiving neither affirmation or nor denial.

Sachiko took several fast steps toward him. She completely expected his next move which was him rushing up the steps to meet her, to be on the same level as her. Probably a good idea for his safety. Pushing him down the stairs had become awfully tempting.

"Why did you even offer to tutor me if you didn't want to do it? You had already told me no."

She poked him in the chest with every word she spoke. His flesh felt shockingly firm under her prodding finger. He had nicely built pectorals. She had taken it for granted he was nothing but skin stretched over bones under his school uniform that never gave any hint to what lay underneath.

She poked him again, noting the softness of the black cotton t-shirt exposed by the open front of the plaid button down shirt. Even when dressed casually, he was still so damn coordinated and pulled together.

"Stop that," he snapped, swatting away her hand with a back handed slap.

Startled by the slap, she pulled her stinging hand to her chest with her other hand and retreated a step back from him. She was embarrassed more than physically hurt. He had swiped at her like an annoying fly or a bothersome child. That was the second time he had wounded her pride. In one day no doubt. He was not the first man to shame her, to injure her pride and steal her dignity. But she would make damn sure he would be the last one to do so if he continued.

"There is nothing wrong with a person trying to improve themselves. I find it admirable that you believe that good is not good enough and you want to be better. No matter what the cost. Even humbling yourself to ask your rival for help."

Sachiko remained silent, unsure of what to say. Dizziness made the hazy yellow light from the street lamp form a golden halo around his entire body. She should not have skipped lunch and dinner to study.

"Surprised that I know exactly what you think of me?" he inquired, advancing a step toward her.

"No. Not really," she mumbled, raising her chin defiantly.

She was actually about to faint. She could not allow that to happen because she would be showing weakness in front of him.

If Light Yagami wanted a battle of wit and will, she would be more than happy to give it to him. Time to suck it up and face him like a woman.

Placing her feet shoulder width apart and standing directly in front of him, she pressed her fists into her hips. Her eyes met his and stubbornly held them. Demonstrating not only confidence but brazen egotism should appeal to his hubris.

"So, are you going to tutor me or not? Tell me honestly, right now, so we can get on with this or get it over with."

~~~\\\/~~~

Light took a moment to examine her closely, allowing his eyes to glide slowly from her head down to the black ballerina flats on her feet. She actually looked...presentable. Her hair had been left unfettered and appeared to be styled. Corkscrew curls resembling extremely long spiral shavings of richly colored, dark oak wood bounced above her shoulders. Her silver eyes almost glowed. Her embarrassment and aggravation had painted two vivid spots of bright pink coloration on the apples of her cheeks giving her a radiant aura. Rage actually looked good on her. Loose jeans and a shapeless pink t-shirt hid her figure like the baggy, ill fitting, hopelessly wrinkled sailor dress uniform she wore to school. She stood with her hands on her hips glowering at him like an obstinate child.

A muscle in his cheek twitched, involuntarily attempting to pull his mouth into a smile. She could be cute. He refused to permit the smile to fully form. Besides, she would open her mouth again soon and shatter the image of a cute girl she miraculously projected at the moment.

However, this time it was not her mouth that ruined things. It was her belly issuing a growl of hunger. A roar really, like the sound a terrifying beast trapped at the bottom of an empty pit.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she replied. Her body betrayed her, the beast snarling in direct opposition to her words and exposing her as a liar.

"Okay, well, if you would like something to eat we can go to a nearby restaurant."

She opened her mouth to protest, but before she could, he added, "I'm paying. Besides, knowing you, you've already been studying here for hours. You skipped lunch as well, didn't you?"

Her face turned red giving him a silent affirmation that he had spoken the truth.

"Let me get my things," she murmured, disappearing into the library.

~~~\\\/~~~

"Shit, shit, shit," she muttered under her breath, shoving her books into her backpack.

 _Pull yourself together. You've got to learn to stay composed when you're around him. Quit being so damn awkward,_ she chastised herself.

Sachiko rubbed the back of her hand. His touch had startled her. It hadn't really hurt, but there was something so humiliating about a slap.

Without thinking about her actions, she reached up to touch her cheek recalling the pain, both physical and mental, of the hard, open handed slaps she had received to her face when she refused her uncle's sexual advances. She didn't stop fighting him until he punched her with a closed fist and knocked her unconscious, leaving her unable to defend herself.

Tomorrow she would have her monthly appointment with her psychologist; a female for apparent reasons. If it weren't for Ms. Fujita, or Mr. Okada who introduced her to the therapist, she would be dead - either by her uncle's hand or her own. She had come a long way in her healing over the past year, but there was still a long way to go.

Her fingers grew cold and trembled uncontrollably. Fumble fingered, she dropped her open pencil case on the floor.

"Dammit," she sighed, bending down to pick up the half dozen pencils, pens, and half used block of white eraser.

One day she would be beyond all of this. She would not allow her past to haunt her forever. There were more scary monsters out there in the world to defeat, more dragons to slay.

A hand covered hers, warming her frozen fingers while steadying her shaking digits.

 _Oh, look, here's one now,_ warned a little voice from deep inside of her.

"Let me help you," Light offered.

"Thank you." She carefully peeled her hand away from his. Standing to her feet, she tidied her notebooks and textbooks in her backpack.

 _He's not a monster,_ she argued with the voice. Perhaps the voice belonged to reason or maybe it was fear talking. She could not allow fear to rule her life, or ruin her life, anymore.

 _Things aren't always what they seem. Even pretty flowers can harbor deadly poison. The most handsome face can hide an evil monster. Take your uncle for example -_

"No!" she barked.

The single sharply spoken word echoed through the library. The noise caused everyone, including Light, to stare at her, startled by the sudden burst of sound in a place of silence.

Light's face turned bright pink, the color spreading down his neck until it disappeared under the v-neck of his t-shirt. He crammed the pencil case into her open backpack she had slung over her shoulder.

"Let's go," he snapped, seizing her by the wrist.

Weighed down by leaden legs and her full backpack, Sachiko was forced to walk/run in an attempt to keep up. He covered ground fast. His longer legs moved swiftly to escape the embarrassing situation as all eyes were on them the entire way to the door.

Once out the door, he continued to pull her, practically dragging her down the stairs. On the second to last step, she lost her footing and tripped. Crashing face first into his back saved her from hitting the ground. However, her nose received such a painful bump on his backbone she saw stars.

"That's enough," she growled, twisting her wrist and snatching it free from his vise like grip.

He whirled around to face her. Due to his proximity and the expression of outrage on his face, she jumped back, dropping her backpack. Her arms immediately came up, one shielding her face and the other her upper body. Her body had acted on learned habits bred by years of abuse.

"I don't know what happened back there, but something did," he spoke, his voice soft, soothing. "Does it have something to do with Mr. Okada?"

~~~\\\/~~~

Light had stumbled across a sore spot witnessing her unexpected behavior to his seemingly innocuous actions. He observed her arms gradually dropping to her sides, moving in slow motion. She would not look at him. Not so bold now, she looked positively deflated.

He surmised she had suffered some kind of horrible abuse, most likely over an extended period of time. Whatever happened to her had been awful, leaving deep scars and traumatic memories etched into her conscious and subconscious. Mr. Okada, the teacher she had been rumored to be involved with, could not be the culprit of the systematic abuse, but he was closely tied to her emotionally nonetheless considering her reaction to his question.

For a terrifying second, he thought she was going to cry. That would be bad. He would be forced to comfort a sobbing, snotty mess of a woman he did not really like.

"I don't want to talk about it," she mumbled almost incoherently, her voice thick with the tears she would not allow to fall.

"Are you sure?" he inquired, his voice low and sympathetic. "I'm a great listener."

"No. I don't want to talk about it." She raised her eyes, albeit briefly, to meet his. She stooped to pick up the backpack she had tossed aside earlier in her body's reflexive action to protect itself.

"Well, if you ever want to talk - "

"Hey, Yagami, you're not my friend," she stated flatly. "I don't know you like that. And you don't want to know me like that so..." Her words trailed off when she almost lost the war against her tears. She shrugged in an apologetic manner.

He was not sure if she could not think of any more words or simply could not speak them without dissolving into tears. His chest felt hollow as if she had punched a hole in him with her truthful, scathing words. He did not like this sensation.

"I _could be_ your friend."

She smiled a sad smile on quivering lips, shaking her head.

"Hey, uhm, I think we should end this, whatever this is, here," she sniffed, backing away from him in a slow retreat. "I'm suddenly not feeling well. I think I'll just go home."

A normal person would have felt guilty for being so relieved by her letting him off the hook not just for tonight but permanently. He was not normal. Deep down, he felt extraordinarily offended that she was actually rejecting him.

"Another time?" he suggested, trying to set out bait for a trap.

For some reason it had suddenly become important for him to get to know her, to be close to her. Most women could not keep secrets. Obviously she could. Plus she was turning him down for a dinner date. He had asked her out, and she had told him no. Who did she think she is anyway? No girl in her right mind would ever refuse time alone with him.

Light watched her continued struggle to keep her tears at bay. Although he could see the gleam of the salty drops pooling in the corners of her eyes, she somehow managed to hold back the tide.

Rather than seeking a listening ear and sympathetic words, she had refused his offers of both. The one emotion she seemed comfortable with expressing was her anger. All of her weirdness, from her puzzling physical reactions to her wide swings in emotion, vexed him yet intrigued him.

She sighed loudly, dramatically, rolling her eyes toward the sky.

" _Maybe_ another time," she acquiesced as if she were doing him a favor.

 _Damn this woman_ , he seethed internally but plastered a big smile on his face. She smiled in return, a sad smile, but still a smile.

 _She has dimples. I never noticed. By why would I?,_ he asked himself while he stared at the indentations that had appeared in her cheeks at the corners of her mouth.

"Good night," she said, turning her back to him.

"Do you need me to walk you home?" He hoped she would say no.

"No. I'm a big girl. I can get home just fine," she returned.

She was too far away to hear his loud sigh.

"See you tomorrow," he yelled after her in the friendliest manner he could muster.

"Yeah." She raised her hand in a wave without looking back.

 _Soon I will have you where I want you. But then what am I going to do with you? You're intelligent and determined but damaged. That could be a dangerous combination. You might be of some use to me. We shall see._

Light grinned. It probably appeared a tad evil. He did not care. There was no reason to hide it. No one was watching him.

~~~\\\/~~~

But someone was watching him. His black lips peeled back from his pointed teeth, his massive mouth spreading into a diabolical grin.

"Soon Light, very soon. The notebook will be yours. A god will be born."

* * *

 _"Know your enemy_

 _Know yourself._

 _And victory is never in doubt,_

 _Not even in a hundred battles."_

The Art of War _by Sun Tzu_


	5. Chapter 5: Getting to know all about you

Light glimpsed at the empty desk next to his. Time check: 8:07. According to the pattern she has established, Sachiko should be rushing in, harried and frazzled, within the next 3 minutes. At least she was consistent in her lateness.

Class began promptly at 8:10. English Literature. Light glanced at his watch to double check the time. His eyes went to the door. Still no Sachiko. Hmmmm...odd. He had never known her to actually miss a day. At least not within the last year.

He reached into his desk to retrieve his phone while keeping his eyes on the teacher. Phones were supposed to be kept in their lockers during class time so he had to be careful not to get caught. When his finger touched the cool, smooth glass of the screen it was then he realized he did not have her phone number.

"Damn," he cursed under his breath, pushing the phone back into his desk.

Light sighed, ennui setting in as it always did when the teacher started to talk. His eyes moved to the window. His mind wandered back to their encounter at the library last night.

Sachiko surprised him by being intuitive enough to figure out his elementary plan to avoid her. He had pulled that trick on many girls before to bypass unwanted confessions of love or circumvent other uncomfortable meetings he had somehow been obligated to attend. Each time he had convinced them that they had been at fault; they were to blame for the missed rendezvous due to getting the time or place wrong.

Considering her near obsessive study habits, he had planned on her being at the library before him. Therefore, she would be inside and never see him, allowing him to get away scot free. He had actually shown up to keep himself above reproach in that he could truthfully say he had been there and waited for her.

The next day an ugly confrontation would have ensued. Like she had said, he would have told her he had waited ten minutes, a proper amount of time, before leaving because she never showed. He did not mind faking a bit of stupidity claiming it had never occurred to him to look for her inside the building. After stirring her feminine sympathies for his temporary obtuseness, he still look like a squeaky clean good guy.

 _'Where were you?'_ she would have indignantly demanded. She would most likely be crying. They always cried.

He would have responded, acting rightly offended himself, ' _I was there. I waited and you never showed._ _Where were you_?'

She would be flustered and embarrassed learning she had been in the wrong. The apologies would spill out of her mouth in stuttered phrases like word vomit. When she attempted to reschedule their meeting, he could hotly deny her the opportunity. Situation averted. Problem solved. The end.

That is how it should have gone. But she was more intuitive and clever than he had imagined. He had underestimated her; a mistake he would not make again.

In manipulating people, he found it of the utmost importance to maintain credibility and respectability to remain above suspicion. It enabled one to be overlooked entirely or quickly be crossed off the list of suspects should a bad situation arise.

Unfortunately for him, she was not as dumb or as desperate as the others. She called him on his practiced deceit which was something he had not anticipated. She had somehow managed to get a step ahead of him.

"Tch," he hissed.

Something flew past the window. A bird? No. It had not really flown. Something inanimate, falling from the sky. Black and white, fluttery. A notebook. The pages had made the flapping motion. Some kid probably dropped his notebook from the roof. Whatever.

Light placed his chin back in his cupped palm to hold his head up because all of the thoughts going round in his brain made it feel too heavy.

~~~\\\/~~~

"How have you been?"

This question started every session. It was more than just a perfunctory greeting. Ms. Fujita needed to know exactly how Sachiko had been coping with life in general since the last visit. She was always sincere, expressing genuine concern.

Lots of pastel colors and comfortable furniture decorated the psychologist's sunny office. The woman sat to her right in a puffy cushioned chair upholstered in sky blue velvety material exactly like the one she was sitting in. No stuffy brown leather couches or high backed executive chairs here. No desk to dominate the office or sit behind to intimidate her patients. Book shelves and filing cabinets held all of the office supplies or charts the therapist would require.

Ms. Fujita appeared to be in her late twenties, possibly early thirties. She had board straight black hair, shiny as a raven's wings. Her eyes were dark like glossy black marbles. They reminded Sachiko of a crow's eyes, piercing and direct, as if they could look deep into her to see her very soul. But they were kind. Those eyes held a gentleness that invited Sachiko to tell her everything.

Small boned and petite, Ms. Fujita moved with polished elegance and inherent grace. Always dressed in skirts, silk blouses, and high heels, she looked like a page out of a fashion magazine.

Sachiko yearned to be like Ms. Fujita one day. She wanted to be strong, independent, gorgeous, and confident. She wanted to know what it was like to be brave and unafraid, to face life and all of it's crap without flinching. And be positively radiant doing it.

"You didn't sleep well last night did you?" the therapist pressed when she did not answer.

Sachiko never wore make up so she had nothing to conceal the bruise-like darkness under her eyes. She sighed. There was no reason to lie. This was a safe place to express her true thoughts and feelings.

"No. I had a nightmare," she confessed.

"It's been a while since you've had trouble with bad dreams. About _him_?"

She appreciated the therapist not speaking her uncle's name. Hearing his name out loud had a tendency to make her queasy. He had made her call out his name, over and over, when he would do certain repulsive things to her.

"About him," Sachiko confirmed, placing a hand on her belly in a pointless attempt to make it cease somersaulting.

"Recalling events of the past?"

"Of course."

"New memories or the old?"

"Replaying the old. Again and again. Like a bad erotic horror movie in my head."

"He hasn't contacted you has he?" Ms. Fujita inquired, her immaculately waxed eyebrows drawing together over her thin, straight nose.

"No. Thank God," Sachiko exhaled in relief. "As far as I know, he still doesn't know where I am."

"Good. We'll do everything to keep it that way," she added, writing on the legal pad she held in her hand.

By 'we' she referred to not only herself and Sachiko but also Mr. Okada. Mr. Okada had been a high school classmate and fellow university student of Ms. Fujita's. Perhaps that was the reason, these sessions were pro bono. Both people have played an integral role in saving her life. One day, she would repay them for their kindness.

"Did something happen to trigger the dream?"

"I flinched," Sachiko began unsure how to explain the situation.

"Flinched?" the therapist questioned, her eyebrow raising inquisitively. The woman possessed extremely expressive eyebrows.

"Well...I mean...mmmm," she hummed, unable to find the words.

"Just start talking. I'll figure it out. As we've discussed before, there are no right words to express your thoughts and feelings." Her pen hung in midair over the yellow paper lined in blue, ready to take notes.

"I was meeting a guy at the library last night. He was going to tutor me. We argued. He grabbed my wrist and literally dragged me along behind him. I ran into him by accident then when he turned around real fast, I thought he was going to - " She stopped, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves. "I assumed he was going to hit me."

"It was an automatic reaction to past experiences. It was not your fault. Your body had learned to react in a certain way for self-protection," the therapist explained.

"I know, but I thought I was beyond all that."

"It's only been a year. Give yourself time. You'll move past this but your mind needs so much more time than your body to heal." She sighed, leaning forward to place her hands over Sachiko's and the fingers which twiddled nervously. Her penetrating eyes met Sachiko's to give her next words the sincerity they deserved. "You will get through this. You will be great."

Sachiko could feel a warm blush of happiness spreading across her cheeks. She needed to hear those encouraging words because sometimes she was not so sure she could bear another day in the present because of her past.

Last night had been the most miserable one in a while. When her alarm shattered the quiet in her dumpy apartment at 3AM, she had already been staring at the dirty, cracked ceiling for hours. She had forced herself to go to work despite her lack of sleep. By the time 7:30 had come around and her shift ended, she could not muster the physical strength or mental fortitude to make it school. She had been unable to find it within herself to push past her embarrassment and exhaustion to face Light Yagami. Not today.

"Will you tell me about the dream?"

Ms. Fujita always asked about her dreams, finding great symbolism in them. She believes dreams are the mind's way of unconsciously rationalizing complex, painful problems it cannot otherwise cope with on a conscious level.

Sachiko had fallen asleep just long enough to dream a horrible nightmare of a nasty creature, all teeth and claws, chasing her. His sharp nails had shredded her clothes and torn her skin while stripping her naked. His fangs dripped saliva onto her chest while he forced himself into her, hurting her, tearing her apart on the inside. At the end of the grotesque night terror, the werewolf ate her heart then her brain.

"You find it easier to view your uncle as monster rather than a man."

"Obviously," Sachiko muttered, rolling her eyes. In most memories, her uncle appeared as some sort of vicious animal. "He is a monster."

"Don't interrupt, and don't be snarky," the psychologist admonished her. "I believe him eating your heart symbolizes him devouring your emotions, your good feelings, particularly the love you once held for him as a caretaker and paternal figure in your life. Your brain, well, that hints toward him destroying your mental health. What do you think?"

Sachiko shrugged noncommittally. "Makes sense to me. I would agree."

"Are you _really_ okay?" Ms. Fujita stared at her as if attempting to discover what Sachiko was attempting to hide.

 _Of course I'm not okay. Why would I be here?_ , she wanted to retort but withheld. She had already been warned once about being a smart ass. Ms. Fujita could act like a mother sometimes.

"I-I d-don't kn-know." She stuttered the lie because she knew exactly what, or more specifically who, had her so addled.

"This boy..."

"What boy?" She did not want to talk about him.

"The boy who made you flinch. He probably triggered your dream. Tell me about him. Who is he? What did you argue about?" An expression of confusion passed over her face, clouding her bright eyes. "Why do you need a tutor? Your grades a great. I need to know more about this boy."

Sachiko could not be certain if Dr. Fujita was asking all of these questions from a professional or maternal standpoint.

"But I only have forty five minutes left."

"Take all the time you need." She smiled as if she had a trick up her sleeve, her black eyes glinting. "My next appointment cancelled. Please begin."

Sachiko sucked in a deep breath. Where should she begin in explaining Light Yagami?


	6. Chapter 6: Not precisely my cup of tea

Light gaped at the shabby three story apartment building in front of him. It was an ancient inner city tenement that looked like it been the first building erected in this part of town and had never been repaired or updated.

 _This can't be right,_ he thought, rechecking the address on the paper their homeroom teacher had given him.

Just as he thought, he had not made a mistake. This is where Sachiko lived.

Only she had the ability to make him second guess himself. Presently, he pondered what in the hell had possessed him to come here. Driven by the need to know his adversary better, he had volunteered to bring her the assignments she had missed. He felt the inexplicable need to know more about her. An enigma of a woman, she baffled him and challenged him like no one ever had.

Light did not feel threatened by her, but she evoked a definitive uneasiness in him that he could not shake. She had demonstrated the ability to see straight through him, getting to the crux of his true intentions without hesitation. Someone like her bore the possibility of becoming a formidable foe by exposing him to the lowbrow plebeians he hated as something less than they believed him to be - something less than he believed _himself_ to be.

Although he was sure he would never see her again after graduation, there was still far too much time in between the present and that blessed event to take any chances. And if fate for some ironically comical reason made their paths cross again, she might be a powerful ally. Sun Tzu asserted in his book _The Art of War_ that one should "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." After seeing her in action, he took that advice to heart.

Sachiko also seemed to have no romantic interest in him whatsoever which intrigued him. The idea of making her fall in love with him only to break her heart captivated his imagination. He wanted to drag her off of her ivory tower she had dared to elevate herself on in her futile attempt to be better than him.

Light adjusted the strap of the book bag hanging on his shoulder. He reached into his pocket for his phone to call her to verify the address. He had gotten her phone number from their teacher as well.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" she demanded from behind him before he could initiate the call.

"Charming," Light sighed. This dirty slum really did suit her after all.

"I asked you a question. What are you doing here?" she repeated, enunciating each word carefully.

Light bit the inside of his cheek to prevent himself from saying something profane and unrefined. He reached inside his bag, careful to avoid grabbing the unusual notebook he had found, to pull out her purple and white composition book. The teacher had written notes detailing her make up assignments and crammed the necessary worksheets inside.

"I brought you your assignments for the day. You will also have a make up test in Advanced Algebra tomorrow," he informed her with relish.

"Oh, no," Sachiko whined, taking the notebook from him.

She pressed the heel of her hand to her forehead as if struck with a sudden headache. This gesture drew his attention to her face. At first he wondered if she had been in a fist fight due to dark purple circles under her eyes. More pale than usual, she looked as if a painter had gone wild with brown paint because her freckles stood out in such stark contrast on the background of sickly white.

"Hey, why don't I take you to get something to eat? You look like you could use it."

"I'm not in the mood to go out," she replied, looking as if she were about to cry - or have an aneurysm.

"Okay then. Why don't we order ramen and have it delivered? While we're waiting, we can start on the information that will be on the test tomorrow," he suggested, giving her his most friendly false smile.

Sachiko's eyes narrowed while she studied his face. "Why? I want to know why?"

"Why what?" he inquired, his voice rising with feigned innocence.

"Why are you being so nice to me? Why are you willing to help me? I'm a nobody. I'm less than nobody," she snorted in self-derision. "I have no clout, no connections. I have nothing to offer you. Nothing you would want anyway. What do you want from me?"

The fake grin gradually fell into a purposely placed mask of indifference to conceal his growing rage. Damn this woman anyway.

"Th-there's just something about y-you," he stammered in hopes of off setting her iron-clad guard that was always up. He wanted to make her believe she had caught him at a vulnerable point.

"Fine. Don't tell me," she muttered, rolling her eyes. "Ramen does sound good. I'm starving. And I need your help to prepare for the test. Otherwise I'll have another sleepless night."

"Okay. Let's go. Lead the way."

~~~\\\/~~~

 _This can't be happening,_ Sachiko thought to herself. _Oh, well, one look at my apartment, and he will leave as quickly as possible. Then maybe he will never show up here again._

The idea of him knowing where she lived made her exceedingly uncomfortable. She would have a discussion with their homeroom teacher about this. Of course, the man probably thought he was helping her out when Light volunteered to bring her the missed assignments. But why would he do such a thing? Selfless was probably the only term starting with self not in his vocabulary.

Rummaging in her purse for her keys while it still hung on her shoulder, she ventured a furtive glance back at him. A sideways grin quirked up the right corner of her mouth. This would probably be the only time he would allow himself to be led by a woman, submissively following behind her. He looked around at everything, ignoring her completely while they made their way up the flights up steps on the outer corridors to the third floor.

Stopping at the door with 306 on it, she inserted her key into the doorknob. No fancy electronic locks here. Good old fashioned low tech, and cheap, metal tumblers that required a key. The scratched metal six on the door squeaked, twisting down to form a nine. She groaned miserably. She pushed the tail of the number back up and slapped it back into place with her palm.

"It's always doing that," she explained for no particular reason. Opening the door, she walked inside leaving him no choice but to follow.

Sachiko kicked off her shoes, leaving them at the single step in the minuscule foyer. Her body stiffened when she heard the door lock engage after he turned the deadbolt. Her heart pounded in her ears, and she felt sick. Pressing her hand to her throat, she willed herself to breath to ward off the invisible fingers of fear that tried to choke her.

The bare bulb hanging from the ceiling in the foyer bathed the entire apartment in a jaundiced light. All living spaces, kitchen, dining, living, and bedroom were all combined into a single room. A bathroom the size of a small closet contained a toilet, a sink, and a shower offering privacy for the more personal needs of living. The only pieces of furniture in the apartment were a futon in the middle of the floor of the living room/bedroom and three backless wooden bar stools placed at the bar height counter in the kitchen/dining area.

Bookcases lined one wall of the room. All of her earthly possessions, which were pitifully few, filled less than half the shelves. Two shelves held neatly folded clothes. A dozen assorted knick-knacks including a ceramic good luck cat and an antique glass perfume atomizer sat on another. Twenty or so books that Mr. Okada and Ms. Fujita had given to her took up space on three shelves.

The place was battered and run-down but clean. She did the best she could with what she had. Previously she had lived in a five bedroom house with three full bathrooms. A veritable mansion. A beautiful house of horrors. To her this ratty old apartment was a palace of freedom and safety. She would rather live here as an emancipated pauper rather than in that luxurious estate situated in hell as a tortured prisoner.

Sachiko turned on the overhead kitchen fixture. The fluorescent bulbs blinked to life dispelling the sickening yellow light from the foyer. The place still didn't look any better, but it was home.

"While you order the food, I'll get our drinks. Tea, soda, water, or milk?" she offered, opening the refrigerator.

"Tea," he answered, laying his bag on the bare counter.

"Hot or cold?"

"Hot." The number to his favorite ramen place was saved on his phone so he simply scrolled down and pressed the name to dial.

"Oh, I have coffee too."

"Tea is fine. Green if you have it."

She did have green tea. Coffee for her. She liked tea but tonight she preferred coffee over tea.

Distracting herself with preparing their drinks kept her from being nervous and downright fearful. This would be her first time being alone with a man since leaving her uncle's house. She had never planned on inviting a man to her apartment. But she had not really invited this one to be here. He had more than less invited himself.

Sachiko stood over the five cup coffee pot, inhaling the scent of the coffee while it brewed. Such a glorious aroma. The only scent that came close to the rapturous glory of freshly brewed coffee was the bread she baked every morning. She always baked a single serving size for herself for quality control and breakfast purposes.

There was also the delicious array of cakes and cookies she enjoyed baking. Along with the basic offerings, the owner of the bakery allowed her to have artistic license when creating new goods to sell. Dozens of flavorings and spices, sweet icings and glazes, sprinkles of all colors and shapes and sizes, nuts and fruits of all kinds made the possibilities of combinations virtually endless. Never once did she grow tired trying new combinations.

Sachiko loved her job. She had learned to bake while living with her uncle. Bread came first. She found the punching and kneading of the dough to be therapeutic. Then cookies which needed babysitting while baking, requiring her to stay in the kitchen. Baking occupied her and gave her good excuse to stay away from him.

Her uncle would take the baked goods to work to brag about his incredible niece whom he loved so dearly. He was such a nice guy, such a wonderful guy. A single man who had sacrificed his happy bachelor lifestyle to take on the burden of caring for his poor orphaned niece. Yes, yes, such a saint.

Sachiko wanted to vomit. As a matter of fact...

"Oh, god," she gasped, running for the bathroom.

She barely made it into the tiny bathroom, slamming the door behind her, before heaving into the toilet. Pure acid seared her throat and mouth. She had forgotten to eat today so there was nothing else in her stomach.

How embarrassing. Why did _he_ have to be here? She cried while rinsing her face with cold water and brushing her teeth. Before exiting the bathroom, she soaked a washcloth in cool water to hold it against her neck to stave off another bout of nausea.

"Yagami, I...oh," she inhaled upon realizing she was alone.

Disappointment mingled with her lingering embarrassment. She could not blame him for leaving. Hearing her throw up had to be disgusting. Plus he probably assumed she had a stomach bug since she had been absent from school.

The knock on the door startled her, causing her to jump so violently her feet actually came off the floor. When a second, rudely insistent knock sounded, she stomped to the door. Peeking through peephole, she saw a delivery man standing at the door.

"Shit," she hissed. She did not have money to pay for the food.

"Hey in there! Somebody better pay for this food!" the delivery man yelled, pounding on the door.

"Hey! Stop that!" she heard Light bellow from a distance. He was probably at the end of the corridor by the stairs. "I'm here, man. I had to go get drinks. I didn't think you would get here so quickly."

Sachiko slumped forward, relieved that he had not abandoned her. The delivery man had sounded pretty upset. Understandably so really. He would have had to pay for the food out of his own wages had they skipped out on paying him. She opened the door when she could hear Light standing outside talking to the man.

"Are you all right?" he asked her, thrusting a canned drink at her. "It's ginger soda. It will settle your stomach. Go sit down before you fall down. You look like you're about to faint."

Sachiko felt too weak and shaky to offer a nasty retort to his sharp orders. She pulled the tab opening the can with a gratifying pop and hiss. Sliding onto one of the bar stools, she sipped at the warm soda. The warmth gave the ginger an almost unbearably spicy bite.

Light kicked the door closed behind himself when he entered carrying a bowl in each hand. She watched him kick off his shoes, pushing them next to hers. A strangled laugh erupted as a snort when he carefully placed their shoes parallel to each other but kept them from touching.

"I picked the tofu and vegetable ramen for you since you're not feeling well," he said, setting the covered plastic bowl in front of her. He gave her a set of disposable chopsticks and a plastic spoon.

"That's fine," she returned, popping off the lid. Beggars can't be choosers anyway.

Any other time she would have preferred pork ramen, but not tonight. He had chosen well, but she wouldn't tell him that. The scent of her coffee reached her nose, reminding her of their forgotten drinks.

"Oh, your tea." She stretched one foot toward the floor in preparation to get up to retrieve the cup.

"I'll get it." He went around the island to fetch his tea. "Do you want your coffee now or after dinner?"

"I think after dinner would be better." She kept her eyes on her food while he walked back to his seat.

The ramen was really good. The broth was chicken based and extremely flavorful. The vegetables retained a bit of crispness. The tofu had been been marinated in soy sauce imparting umami not only to it but the whole dish.

"Thank you for dinner, Yagami. Can I get the name of that place and the number from you?" she asked, shoving a spoonful of the soup into her mouth.

"Sure. Or I can just order it again the next time I come over."

Sachiko swallowed so hard it produced an audible sound she had no doubt he heard. She refused to be so uncouth as to spew the mouthful of broth all over the kitchen.

Next time? He planned on coming over _again_? What the hell was happening here?


	7. Chapter 7: This is Only a Test

Light walked into the classroom too distracted by his own thoughts to notice Sachiko sitting at her desk. He dropped down heavily into his seat, staring straight ahead. Despite being exhausted from the tutoring session that had lasted until midnight, he had gone home to investigate the weird notebook.

Two words in silver, _DEATH NOTE_ , adorned the black leather cover. Death Note? Really? What is that supposed to mean? Inside the cover was a list of rules. Lots and lots of rules. He had read them over and over until his head ached. The pages of the book looked ordinary: plain white paper lined in blue. Nothing unusual or fancy. Yet this unremarkable notebook supposedly held the power to kill simply by writing a name in it.

He did not buy it. Perhaps he would try it out soon. An educated mind should at least test it to find out if it is the real deal. Scientists learn and make discoveries by performing experiments. He should be scientific about this. Criminals would make the ideal test subjects. Murderers, thieves, rapists, and all the rest of the detritus of human existence. He would be doing the world a favor by ridding it of this trash.

"Yagami? Hey, Yagami."

The pleasant female voice filtered into his racing thoughts. The insistent tug on his arm pulled him out of his fantasies of cleaning up the human debris from the planet.

"Wh-what is it?" he stammered.

The sound of her calling his name had been so nice, reaching through his fevered musings to yank him back to reality. His body grew taut as a wire, his eyebrows drawing together to show his annoyance. He should not have been pleased to hear her especially when she snatched him away from his dreams of making this world, his world, better.

"Thank you for last night. For the food and helping me study," she clarified when he stared at her blankly.

"Yeah, no problem," he rejoined, stifling a yawn behind his hand.

"I'm sorry I kept you up so late," she apologized, a blush lighting up her cheeks.

The cold heart in his chest warmed, beating a little bit faster. Dammit all! He wanted to be angry with her. Why did she have to look so damn cute when she blushed? And what was wrong with him for thinking she looked cute?

"I'm sorry," she apologized again, looking away from him.

"It's all right." He did not bother to tell her he had stayed up until three of his own volition entranced with the notebook that held the promise of giving him god-like powers over life and death.

Light would become a god if the notebook worked. He would be a better god than those of ancient mythology who fell prey to their own human-like weaknesses, their petty lusts and juveniles jealousies. Armed with the knowledge of their failures, of their inherent personality defects, he would be smarter and better than them, not repeating their mistakes.

"When are you taking your test?" he asked, opening his book bag. He started unloading his books to avoid looking at her. He had left the Death Note at home, safely locked away in his desk in his bedroom.

"Third period. During study hall. Want to meet me on the roof at lunch? I can tell you what I made on it then," she said. Her voice sounded hopeful, pleading - almost if she was searching for his approval.

"Sure."

* * *

~\\..'../~

Sachiko rested her elbows on the top of the four foot tall, two foot wide brick wall surrounding the roof. She gazed at the grounds below thinking how lovely they looked.

Cherry, maple, oak, chestnut, and pine trees dotted the green spaces between the sidewalks that created a maze across the property. The hedges were trimmed into squares. Flowers were arranged by color in wooden boxes around the building.

The sun shone down, the rays warming her skin. Inevitably more freckles would pop up from being in the sun, but she did not care. It felt good. Sachiko closed her eyes, inhaling the scent of the flowers and pine carried on the soft breeze. The air held the slightest chill, a hint of autumn's impending advent. She looked forward to it after another hot, miserably humid summer.

For the first time in a long time, she felt at peace, a stillness inside of her. She might even dare to say she was happy. Content at the very least.

The door leading onto the roof opened with a rusty groan breaking her out of her reverie.

Sachiko did not turn around. She heard the high pitched giggle of a girl and the low murmurings of the boy with her. He was whispering sweet nothings in her ear no doubt, making pretty promises he would never keep.

"Hmph," she snorted like a grumpy old lady.

Sachiko sighed, closing her eyes again to shut out the world. One day she wanted to be in love. She yearned to be able to trust, to give her thoughts and emotions to another human being who would cherish them instead of mistreating them. Her arms wrapped around her body in a self-soothing hug. She longed to be touched in a good way. What would it be like to savor an embrace, a kiss? For affection to be right and healthy, even pleasurable? Would she ever be able to have sex without feeling dirty and used?

Suddenly her whole body bristled, every hair standing on end. Someone was standing close to her, his warmth sinking into her skin. Too close. Goose bumps erupted from head to toe making her whole body tingle.

"Here," Light said, shoving a steamed curry bun in her face. "I know you haven't eaten."

Sachiko took the hot round bread stuffed full of delectable meat, vegetables, and spicy gravy. She hoped he did not notice the trembling fingers that lightly grazed his. Her heart thumped heavily in her chest, bumping against her ribs.

"Why do you keep doing this?" she questioned him, still leery of his motives.

Needless to say, she had issues with men who lavished her with attention. She could not help but wonder what they wanted from her in return. Taking small bites, she devoured the delicious bun while trying to rationalize his reasons for being so friendly to her.

It had taken her a while to trust Mr. Okada. By the time she had been able to trust him completely, he was gone - jerked out of her life by stupid, envious people.

He still texted her infrequently to check on her. The last time she had seen him in person was six months ago. Unfortunately, circumstances deemed it necessary that he separate himself from her as much as possible. Otherwise, old rumors would rekindle starting a fire of a whole new scandal that neither one of them wanted.

Damn those girls anyway. They had most likely started those rumors because they were jealous. All of them had wanted the handsome young teacher's attention but none of them had gotten it but her. And it had been on an entirely platonic, almost fatherly, basis.

"Someone needs to take care of you. You seem to have trouble taking care of yourself," Light answered in his typical blunt fashion.

 _There's a reason for that, you asshole,_ she thought to herself, shoving the last bite of bun in her mouth to keep the words from spewing out.

She didn't have the money to buy the things she wanted and sometimes not for what she _needed_. She didn't have the time to primp and fuss with her appearance. Getting to work and school, studying and sleeping in the precious little time in between was far more important than fiddling about with hair and make up.

"Are you going to tell me? Or do I have to tickle it out of you?" he teased, reaching toward her with fingers curled into tickling position.

Sachiko cocked her head resembling a befuddled puppy. His uncharacteristically playful manner confused her.

"You're acting weird," she mumbled in barely coherent syllables since her mouth was full.

Light sighed, dropping his hands and leaning against the wall. "Your grade? What did you make on the test?"

"Oh!" she exclaimed, swallowing the food. "I made a hundred! Can you believe it?"

The ecstatic smile dropped from her face when his face twisted into a mask of rage. His lips turned down into a deep frown, and his eyebrows drew together until they almost touched. The skin on his forehead formed an accordian of anger. What the hell?

"No, I can't," he muttered.

"Aren't you happy?"

"Of course I am. I would hate for all of my effort to have gone to waste."

"You look angry," she pointed out, backing away from him a step.

"Don't do that," he snapped, glaring at her.

"Do what?" She took another backwards step to put more distance between them.

"Do _that_ ," he said, pointing at her feet when she took another step. "Don't act like you're terrified of me. I hate it when you do that."

Sachiko froze when his anger melted away into an expression of hurt. His shoulders slumped forward dejectedly, and he stared at the ground between his brown loafers that had been polished to a mirror finish.

"I'm not doing it on purpose." She crinkled the empty wrapper in her hand to create sound to fill the disconcerting void of silence. "I've just had some really bad things happen to me. Don't take it personally. Me reacting like that has nothing to do with you."

"What kind of things?" Light inquired, raising his head to look at her.

"Terrible things that should only happen in one's worst nightmares, Yagami," she answered, her eyes changing into a dull, steely gray like storm clouds before a thunderstorm breaks.

"You made a perfect score huh?" he asked to change the subject.

"Yeah," she replied, smiling at him.

"So why don't we celebrate? We could do something tomorrow. What do you want to do?"

"I don't know." Tomorrow was Saturday but she had to work until two. After a ten hour shift, she doubted she would feel like doing anything.

"What about the amusement park?" Light suggested.

"Amusement park?"

"When was the last time you had fun? All you do is study."

And work. But he didn't know about that part.

He had a tendency to not take no for an answer so there was no use in rejecting him. She also did not want another unexpected visit to her apartment particularly if she was not there. That would be something else she would have to explain.

"I've got some things I need to do in the morning but I could meet you at the bus station at three," she said, praying he would take that as an answer without requiring further details as to what she would be doing until then.

"Okay. That will be fine."

~~~\\\/~~~

 _What can she possibly be doing until that late in the afternoon?,_ Light wondered. Oh, well, he would not push his luck by asking since she had actually agreed to go with him. His attempt to be charming and funny had fallen pitifully flat so he did not want to risk another failure at being beguiling.

Light genuinely hated it when she acted afraid of him. He could not really blame her though. He had been sincerely livid when he found out she had gotten the same score he had on the test. She need not delude herself into thinking she had become his equal because of one test. But considering her submissive actions of backing away from him, obviously the idea never occurred to her. It had required every ounce of self-control he possessed to get his fury under control. Her fearful reactions bothered him in a way he could not understand, and he did take it personally.

Regaining his composure, he had tried to conjure her compassion by acting wounded. He needed to establish the tiniest amount of trust to crack her bulletproof veneer keeping him out. He had thought for one small moment she might open up to him and tell him what happened. If she poured out her heart to him, an emotional bond would be formed - on her side at least. At any rate, she had not told him in no uncertain terms she did not want to talk about it. He viewed that as progress.

Light believed she had inadvertently assisted him with his plan to seduce her. An evening visit to the amusement park would definitely be more conducive to romantic overtures. In the dark, the atmosphere would naturally be more romantically inclined. Plus, there would be a fireworks display at the end of the night before the park shut down. Fireworks usually meant sharing an amorous gesture. However, he would count himself exceptionally lucky to receive a hug from her.

But one day, she would let him in.


	8. Chapter 8: Breaking the Ice Part 1

Introducing another batch of OCs! Bear with me here, there is a purpose to all of these characters. Some of you might recognize one of these lovely individuals from the original story. I promise that one day the mysterious Mr. Okada will make an appearance as well.

Hope you like the new chapters!

* * *

"Hey, Sachi, it's not like you to be in such a hurry to leave," Himawari announced when Sachiko started preparing to leave at twenty minutes before two.

Usually Sachiko was not in a rush to leave. Typically all she had to look forward to was spending the rest of the day alone in her apartment studying until she went to bed. But today, she had plans. She had things to do and people to see, and she was pretty excited about it.

"What's going on?" Himawari asked in a nosy but good-natured way.

"Nothing," Sachiko replied, shrugging dismissively. She gathered up the bowls, spoons, piping bags, and other implements that needed washing to take them to the sink.

She liked Himawari and not solely because she was the bakery owner's daughter. Friendly and bubbly, a cute girl with a cute personality, she was born to work with people because the customers and the employees alike loved her. She was in her early twenties and had chosen to work at the family business instead of going to university. When her parents retired, the business would become hers.

But her mother, an energetic and friendly woman in her late forties, showed no signs of leaving any time soon. By looking at her, it was easy to see where Himawari got her looks and personality. Mrs. Tanaka had long chestnut brown she kept pulled back in a ponytail. Her brown eyes always sparkled and a genuine smile was a permanent fixture on her line free face which appeared younger than forty eight.

"Do you have a date?" Mrs. Tanaka inquired, poking her head through the window where they passed orders from the front to the back.

"Sachi has a date?!" the Shimura twins piped up in unison, rushing through the swinging door to the back.

Sachiko smiled but did not reply, acting as if she had not heard over the hot water running into the sink.

"Doubt it!" Ai yelled from the front.

"Ugh," Sachiko groaned.

 _Hateful bitch,_ she thought spitefully. The girl's name meant love, but she was anything but loving or kind or even friendly. She often wondered why Mrs. Tanaka kept the girl employed here.

Possibly because when it came to managing money, Ai was a genius. She balanced out the register to the penny every single day, not a cent over or under the amount reflected on the daily totals. She had a talent for ferreting out premium ingredients and negotiating with buyers to get fantastic prices saving the Tanaka's a bundle in operating costs without sacrificing quality.

However, Ai sorely lacked the proper personality for customer service. Therefore she spent most of her time operating the cash register in a little corner while the other girls up front ferried the money back and forth between her and the customer. The rest of the time she stayed in the back office auditing financial ledgers or dealing with vendors, keeping her customer contact to a minimum.

"Who is it? Is he your boyfriend? How long have you been together? Where is he taking you? Why didn't you tell us about him before?" Himawari blurted in a rapid fire but friendly interrogation.

Continuing to wipe down her worktable, Sachiko pretended to be immersed in her work to stop any further questioning. However, in a workplace full of curious females, the tactic was overlooked.

"Please, please tell us, Sachi," the precious twins begged using their large, brown puppy dog eyes to the best of their ability.

"That's so not fair, you two," she admonished them, pausing long enough to pinch both of them on their pudgy little cheeks.

Although fourteen, they appeared to be about eight due to their short and petite childlike figures that had not yet received the message puberty should begin. Emi had long curly black hair and Mari kept her black hair cut short in a shoulder length bob. Otherwise, they would have been difficult to tell apart.

"He's a guy from school. He's not my boyfriend. We're not 'together.' We're going to the amusement park. There's really nothing to tell," Sachiko said, giving them a smile.

"Awww," they all moaned in disappointment.

"Hmph," Ai snorted derisively from her hole by the register. "I knew it."

"All right, ladies, back to work," Mrs. Tanaka proclaimed, shooing the twins back up front when the bell on the door dinged signalling customers had walked in. She disappeared up front as well.

Sachiko was taking off her apron when Mrs. Tanaka returned to the back carrying a bag. She walked over to Sachiko, laying a hand on her shoulder. "Sachi?"

"Hmmm?" she mumbled inquisitively.

"It's the last one. Take this to your boyfriend," she offered, handing her the bag.

Sachiko looked inside to see a dark chocolate cupcake with coconut flavored icing and shreds of coconut on top in a plastic container. She had made those cupcakes this morning. Apparently, the customers liked them.

"But he's not my boyfriend," she argued politely. "I'll pay for this."

"No, you won't. It's a gift to you. You can eat it or give it to him. Do with it what you please," Mrs. Tanaka said, squeezing Sachiko's shoulder. "But promise me this, don't dismiss the possibility of love before you've given it a chance. He's not that man who did those deplorable things to you. Not every man has cruel intentions to use you and hurt you."

Mrs. Tanaka had a cursory understanding of what happened to Sachiko. Knowing specific details had not been necessary. But it was only fair the woman knew the girl she would be hiring had suffered horrible abuse, and there was a low but nonetheless present danger, of the degenerate showing up at her place of business to find Sachiko.

Sachiko smiled and bowed her head. "Thank you."

"Enjoy yourself." Mrs. Tanaka gave her a quick hug.

"I still have ten minutes. I need to finish the dishes and - "

"Just go," the kind woman ordered her. "Ai can finish it."

Sachiko's smile broadened. "Okay."

~\\..'../~

Getting ready was an anxiety inducing game of beat the clock. Sachiko started stripping at the door, leaving a trail of clothing on her way to the bathroom. Stopping by the make up counter at the department store had been a mistake. But she wanted to look nice. Special.

She rushed through her shower, leaving a towel wrapped around her head to dry her hair while she pulled on her clothes. She dressed for comfort in a pair of black skinny jeans and an oversized white button down shirt. Taking a fashion cue from Light, she put on a red tank top underneath, leaving the shirt half unbuttoned. Instead of her ballerina flats, she put on her black and white sneakers. They were a little tattered, but they would have to do.

Filling her palm with a massive dollop of the moisturizing mousse that looked like whipped cream, Sachiko swept her hands through her hair making sure to get the cream through every bit of her of curls so they wouldn't be a mess of tangled frizz.

She grabbed the bag of make up out of her purse. Unable to buy much, she purchased what she deemed to be the essentials: concealer, powder, and lip gloss. After patting the concealer under her eyes to hide the proof of her lack of sleep, she brushed the powder over her face to give her light complexion a little color. Lastly, she applied the light pink lip gloss flavored like strawberries. Kissing him wasn't part of her plan, but just in case...

"Ugh, don't be stupid," she chastised herself, throwing the tube in her purse.

Glancing at the clock on the microwave, she saw that she had ten minutes to get to the bus station fifteen minutes away.

"Shit," she muttered, running for the door.

~\\..'../~

Sachiko saw him at the end of the line at the bus stop. She pushed herself to go faster, pumping her arms and ignoring the burning muscles in her legs. Skidding to halt behind, she took her place in line.

"Hi there. Glad you could make it," Light said without turning around to look at her. He sounded perturbed but not angry.

"I'm not late," she panted trying to catch her breath.

"I know," he rejoined tersely.

"Are you mad?"

"No."

"Then what's your problem?"

"I have something for you." He reached into his backpack, producing a bottle of water. At last he turned around to look at her. He extended the water bottle to her, examining her with a discerning eye. "You look nice."

"Thank you," she said, grateful for the water but too winded and hot to notice the compliment.

"You know, it's going to be an hour long ride by bus. It would be thirty minutes by subway."

"I don't like the subway."

She hated the subway. There were too many people. Too many perverts used the closeness for an opportunity to sate their disgusting and sick desires; grabbing, rubbing, pinching, and touching inappropriately. She quivered at the thought.

Light paid the fare for both of them, although she had her money in her hand ready to pay. He choose seats in the back of the bus, pushing her into the corner by the window.

"Figured you would prefer the wide open view," he explained.

Naturally he would jump to the conclusion she was claustrophobic. Fine by her. When she opened her purse to tuck her money back inside, she remembered the cupcake she had left sitting on her counter. She had taken it out when getting her make up.

"Damn," she moaned, sinking down into her seat.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," she grumbled.

Telling him she had a present for him but left it at her apartment would sound foolish. Or forward. He might assume she was tempting him to come back to her apartment for salacious reasons.

"I forgot something. That's all. No big deal though," she responded.

"Okay. So I've been thinking, if you want to continue to the tutoring sessions, we can set up a regular schedule to make it easy for both of us," Light suggested, pulling a calendar from his back pack.

"Are you being serious right now?" she asked incredulously.

"Of course. I'm always serious," he countered in earnest, not a hint of a smile on his gorgeous face.

Sachiko laughed. She could not help it. He was being hilarious and had absolutely no idea. She hooked her finger into the edge of his bag, pulling it back to get a peek inside.

"What else have you got in there, Mary Poppins?" she joked.

"What? Who?"

"Never mind." Of course he would not understand her reference to the movie about the magical nanny with the magnificent bottomless carpet bag.

"What about Tuesday and Thursday? Eight at the library?" he asked, ready with a pen to mark the days on his calendar.

"I can't come on Thursday. Wednesday?"

"Starting next week I'll have cram school on Monday and Wednesday so those days are out."

"Tuesday and Saturday?"

Not Saturday. Dear God not Saturday. Saturday was her longest shift of the week at the bakery. The last thing she wanted to do what have to come home and deal with him after a ten hour work day.

"Yagami, why don't we kind of work in the study dates as we can? It sounds like both of our schedules are a bit complicated."

"Dates?" he questioned her.

"Study. The key word is study," she remarked.

Light put the calendar back in his pack only to pull out a map of the amusement park.

"Oh, my god," she muttered, shaking her head.

"What do you want to ride first? We could start here and make our way around the park to maximize our time. Or should we just pick out the specific attractions we are interested in and forget the rest?"

"Do also want to plan where and what we'll eat? Allotting a specific amount of allowable time?"

"That's a really great idea. What do you want to eat?"

~\\..'../~

Once inside the park, Sachiko headed straight for the biggest, most intimidating roller coaster with lots of loop-d-loops.

"Are you sure you want to ride this first?" Light asked her when they joined the line.

"Oh, yes, definitely. It's best to get the roller coasters out of the way first. Then we can eat a small snack before moving onto the moderately barf inducing rides."

"Barf inducing?" he repeated, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"Yeah, the ones most likely to make us throw up," she clarified.

"I got the gist of it."

"We can eat again after those. By then we will be getting pretty tired so the quieter, slower moving rides like the haunted house and tunnel of love will be good."

"The haunted house is a quieter ride?"

"In a manner of speaking."

"Tunnel of love," he questioned her, his eyebrow quirking upward quizzically.

"Because it's a calm, relaxing ride. It's on the water too. I love the water," she added wistfully.

"We could go to the beach some time," he offered.

"Autumn is coming," she reminded him.

"We have a little time left to go. Who doesn't like a romantic walk on the beach?"

 _Well, probably you,_ her internal smart ass supplied quickly. She opened her mouth the speak the words but was cut off by the rotund man waiting to usher them onto the roller coaster.

"Next!" bellowed the park employee when they did not immediately step up to take their seat.

"Here we go!" she announced, giving Light her biggest, goofiest grin.

He did not look thrilled, but he got on the ride anyway.

By the end of the night, they had ridden every ride twice with the exception of the haunted house and tunnel of love rides. Oddly, an unspoken agreement had formed between them to stay away from those rides.

Food. All of the glorious, horribly bad for the arteries food available to them boggled them mind and held promise of upsetting the stomach. They ate corn dogs, hamburgers, fries, cotton candy, candy apples, and popcorn, washing it all down with gallons of soda. Shockingly, neither one of them puked.

Sachiko became so jittery from the caffeine and sugar overload she could feel herself vibrating as if experiencing an earthquake from the inside out. The caffeine and sugar mixed with the occasional rush of adrenaline were the only things keeping her awake at this point.

Around nine o'clock, the fact the evening at the amusement park was ending became evident. The crowd began to thin, rides started to shut down, and the food kiosks closed one by one.

Sachiko excused herself for a visit to the restroom. Catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror caused her to gasp in shock. Her curls had been destroyed by the wind rushing through them on the rides. She looked as if she had styled her hair by sticking her finger in the nearest electrical socket. Her minimal make up was totally gone and the circles had darkened under her eyes. Thankfully, she had brought everything with her.

Sachiko wet her hands and ran her fingers through her hair to tame the frizz and reactivate the mousse. She reapplied the concealer and powder. After slathering on a coat of lip gloss, she made a kissy face at herself in the mirror. She chuckled, entertained by her own silliness. She could not remember the last time she had so much fun or had been able to relax and laugh.

"Whatever happens, happens," she murmured, giving her lips one more coat of gloss.

Light sat on the wall of the nearby fountain patiently waiting for her. He was popping two antacids in his mouth when she walked out of the restroom to rejoin him.

The lights in the fountain changed color, painting him with its vivid light. The red made him look sinister like a demon from hell itself.

A bad feeling, a cold, tingling sensation crawling up her spine made her quiver. A hot sickness oozed through her gut. This feeling reminded her of the one she would get when her uncle would look at her.

"No. Not now. Not now," she begged. "I won't let you ruin my present. I won't."


	9. Chapter 9: Breaking the Ice Part 2

"Sachiko?" Light called. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she assured him, flashing him one of her million dollar smiles complete with dimples.

He stood to his feet to meet her when she jogged over to him. Pointing to the slope to the left, he said, "I believe sitting there will give us the best view of the fireworks."

"Okay." She stuffed her hands in her pockets while ambling over to the indicated location.

 _Dammit,_ he cursed internally. He had intended on taking her hand on the way over.

Several couples and a few small families had gathered to watch the fireworks in the area. Light picked a space apart from everyone else near the top of the hill. He took the blanket out of his backpack spreading it out for them.

Sachiko inelegantly plopped down, leaning back on her hands. Foiled again.

Light sat down next to her, close enough that his hip grazed hers. She did not flinch or move away. So far, so good. He checked his watch.

"It will be starting soon," he announced.

"Yagami, I wanted to thank you for tonight. This has been great," she said.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was no problem at all. You deserved it after the hard work you put in to ace that test," he told her, receiving an invisible punch in the gut. It still bothered him she had made the same score as him, putting her on an even academic plane with him.

 _But it is only temporary,_ he comforted himself.

A loud whistle sounded and a white light arced across the sky leaving a gradually vanishing golden trail behind it. The first firework of the night exploded into a burst of a hundred white lights like stars flickering to life and dying in an instant.

Light glanced at her face. She wore an expression of childlike delight, so open, so innocent. How could he be plotting to do something so hateful and malicious to her? For a moment, guilt weighed heavily in his belly. Or maybe it was just all of the junk food he had indulged in.

He leaned back, 'accidentally' placing his hand over hers when he positioned himself to observe the fireworks display. Without moving his head, he slid his eye over to the corner to watch her. She did not seem to notice what he had done being enthralled with the impressive show of decorative explosions above them.

"They're gorgeous," she whispered.

Light stared at her. The fireworks lit up her face in an ever-changing kaleidoscope of color. She smiled and giggled, exhibiting the purest form of joy. Beauty could sometimes be found in the most unexpected place.

"Yeah. They're amazing," he agreed.

His fingers curled around her hand to actually hold it. He felt her hand turning in his and he loosened his grip to allow her to pull away. Instead, she pressed her palm to his, her fingers curling around his hand.

Light smiled, proud of himself. One more baby step. One more link formed in the unseen chain he was wrapping around her. One day she might hang herself with that chain. Whatever happens, happens.

"Awwww," she whined, a frown forming on her face. "It's over."

Sachiko slid her hand from his. She needed it to stifle her yawn.

"It's time to get you home. I feel like I've kept you up past your bedtime," he chuckled lightly watching her yawn like a lion roaring. Apparently all of the caffeine and sugar had worn off.

"You have," she laughed in return. "But I'm glad you did."

Light stood up, holding out his hand for hers. Once he secured her hand in his, he pulled her to her feet.

"Why don't we take the subway home?"

"Yagami, I don't - "

"I know," he interrupted, snatching the blanket up from the ground. "But the subway should not be crowded this late. Besides, I'll be there to protect you. I won't let anyone touch you."

Sachiko dropped her head as if ashamed.

"Hey," he spoke, his voice soft and soothing. He put his hand on her shoulder, and she did not shy away. "Whatever happened to you, it's not your fault. You did nothing to ask for it, and you couldn't stop it. Don't blame yourself."

"I don't." She lifted her head to look at him. The anger he had come to expect from her was back and twice as strong. "I hate _him_ for it," she snarled through her teeth.

Sometimes he could see the potential of her becoming psychotic; perhaps to a murderous degree if given the right motivation. He squeezed her shoulder in a gesture to comfort her, resisting the urge to pull her to him. Too soon. He had had already pushed her boundaries and broken down a few of them. Pushing her too far might cause a setback. Progress had been too painstakingly slow and difficult to have a reversal now.

"Tell me his name," he requested.

"I-I c-can't," she stuttered.

"Tell me. I can - "

"The park is now closed," a voice over the loud speaker broke in. "All park patrons, please make your way to exit gates. Thank you and please come again another day for more fun."

"Let's go," Light said, taking her by the hand.

She never ceased to surprise him. She compliantly allowed him to lead her to the gate. The disquieting silence stretched between them but physically they were closer than ever before. Her grip on his hand was strong as if she would never let him go. Another crack in the Ice Queen's thick shell.

Light led her to the subway station. He could feel her hand trembling in his, but she offered no protest.

"I'm going to let go to buy our tokens over there," he said, pointing to the bank of machines on the wall at the entrance turnstiles. "I'll be right back."

Sachiko nodded, releasing his hand. She hugged her arms around her body while waiting for him. Her exhaustion cut deep lines in her face. The concealer no longer hid the shadows under her eyes. She looked so world weary. It made him wonder if she was as sick of this world as him. Apparently it had not been very kind to her.

"Let's go." He gently prodded her ahead of him, dropping the token into the turnstile for her to go through before following.

It unnerved him that this was the second time he had to accommodate her, getting stuck lagging behind. However, he understood circumstances dictated he do so. A higher purpose needed to be accomplished. Swallowing his pride until he nearly choked on it, he promised himself he would not have to do this again. One day, she would obey him like any good devotee obeys their god.

They were two of only ten people on the platform waiting for the train. Light took her hand again, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"Will you tell me his name now?" he insisted.

"Yagami, I - "

"Light," he cut her off.

Her eyes jerked upward to meet his. She blinked, momentarily bewildered.

"Light," she said. "Can we talk about this later? I'm really tired."

"Okay. Later." He put his arm around her waist since she appeared as if she might fall down at any second.

The train pulled into the station with a rush of wind and crackle of electricity. The air brakes squealed deafeningly while bringing it to a stop.

Light pulled her onto the train, taking a seat near the door. They were the only ones in this car. Perfect. Taking a chance, he put his arm around her shoulders. She surprised him again by leaning into him, resting her head on his shoulder.

Tonight he had discovered a whole new side of her. He had never seen her completely relax, lower her guard, and have fun without worrying what someone, mostly him, might think of her. He had believed her to be like him: serious, single-minded, and goal driven. She was all of those things but more. Until now, he had viewed her as a very one dimensional human being. However, getting to know her a little more, gaining a bit of insight into her weaknesses, would not make him sway from his goal. She would be destroyed. One way or another. She would follow him, or he would move her out of his way.

When the train pulled into the station for her neighborhood, Light shook her awake.

"Oh, I didn't mean to fall asleep," she mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

"It's okay. Here," he said, crouching down in front of her. "Get on."

"No. I can walk," she insisted, almost falling on top of him when she stood up.

"Yeah, sure you can," he sarcastically returned, tapping her on the thigh. "Get on. That's an order. Not a request."

"Yes, sir," she muttered.

He liked the sound of that. He hooked his arms under her legs that she wrapped around his waist. She ensconced his neck with her arms, holding her right wrist with her left hand to get a secure hold but to keep from choking him.

"Thank you, Light. For everything," she mumbled sleepily into his ear as he walked.

Goosebumps erupted on Light's arms. A prickling sensation spread through his thighs and snaked into his pelvic area. A hardness occurred that he could not control. He was not sure if it was her warm breath tickling his ear or her whispered words and voice made raspy by tiredness that caused such a powerful reaction in him.

Whatever she had done to make things hard for him, he did not like it. The erection made it difficult to walk as well which was horribly inconvenient at the moment to say the least.

"Are you all right?" she asked.

"I'm fine. We're almost there."

 _Not close enough,_ he thought, gritting his teeth through the pain.

Light never thought her dilapidated apartment building would look so good. She seemed to sense something was wrong and climbed off his back when he reached the ground level staircase.

"I'll walk up by myself from here. You should go home. It's getting late," she said.

"Good night, Sugiyama."

"You should call me by my first name."

 _Shit. I have no idea what her first name is._

"Sachiko. It's Sachiko," she informed him, actually smiling at him despite the fact he did not know her first name.

He almost breathed a sigh of relief when she did not get upset. They really had made quite a few advancements in their relationship tonight.

"Good night, Sachiko," he said, turning to leave.

"Hey, Light, text me when you get home. I want to know you made it safely."

 _How incredibly sweet._

~\\..'../~

Light entered the dark, quiet house tiptoeing up the stairs. His entire family was already asleep. It was almost eleven after all. He cautiously opened his bedroom door, closing it behind him with no sound but a low click when he turned the lock. Tossing his backpack in the corner, he crossed the room to his desk.

Twisting off the bottom of the pencil cup, he dropped a key into his palm. He hastily unlocked the top drawer of his desk, pressing the corner of the false bottom to pop it up. The Death Note. He took out the notebook, opening it to an empty page.

In two days, he had already filled two pages from top to bottom with the names of criminals whose names and mugshots he had gotten from the evening news. So many degenerates, so little time.

He had hoped to add another name to list tonight. To rid the world of another scumbag. To help eliminate a painful thorn Sachiko's side.

"Oh, shit," he gasped, going to his backpack to retrieve his phone.

Light: _I'm home._

Sachiko: _Okay. Thank you for letting me know. Good night._

Light: _Good night._

Light typed in ' _Can I see you tomorrow?'_ His thumb hovered over the send button _._

"What the hell. Nothing ventured, nothing gain," he mumbled to himself, pressing the button. Keep pushing the boundaries.

He waited. No response. Minutes seemed like hours. Three minutes and forty three seconds later she sent back a reply.

Sachiko: _I'll call you in the morning. We can make plans then._

YES!

Light turned on the TV to watch the late night broadcast of the news. He would celebrate his victory by taking out some trash.

* * *

I tried to make the texting part at the end of this chapter as clear as possible without making it messy. With editing options being limited, it makes it difficult to set it apart or notate it in a pleasant, easy to read way.


	10. Chapter 10: The Black Hole of Light

Please note that I am publishing more than one chapter at a time. The in between chapters are getting a little bit lost due to the order in which the updates are sent. This might be creating confusion and disrupting the flow of events. I don't know how far this momentum will carry me in creating this story but I'm going with it while it lasts. I hope you like the story and continue reading. Thanks!

* * *

Sachiko made it through work by a sheer act of will. Thankfully, no one was in today but her. The bakery did not open on Sundays. However, today was the day to fill big orders and prepare for the week.

There was a wedding cake to decorate that was due to be delivered the next day. After coating each of the six round layers with a foundation of white icing, she sat on a stool to pipe on the icing ribbons outlining the edges and flowing from one level to the next like actual material. Several times she almost slid off when she fell asleep. A few times she had to scrape off the icing and reform the ribbon.

The most difficult part of the process was shaping the lilies made of yellow fondant. She made the stamen and carpel, an integral part of each flower, out of green and orange fondant. Dusting the anthers attached to the ends of the stamen with the orange powdered food coloring, brought the realism of the flowers to a higher level. When putting the flowers together, she made sure some of the dust flaked onto the flower like real pollen.

Sachiko completed the cake by noon. She could leave since her work was complete. However, there were leftover flowers and icing. Throwing away her hard work was out of the question. Instead, she decorated the half dozen cupcakes, her 'quality control' batch, baked the day before with the rest of the cake. They would make a nice present for Light. She wanted to thank him for the wonderful evening at the amusement park. And she had eaten his forgotten cupcake for breakfast.

Sachiko was in the middle of cleaning when her phone beeped alerting her she had received a text message.

Light: _Did you forget about me? It's not morning anymore._

"Shit," she cursed, ripping her apron off.

Sachiko: _Sorry! Want to come over? You can order ramen. I've got dessert._

She took one last glance around before shutting off the lights and locking the door.

Light: _See you in twenty minutes._

"Twenty minutes? Oh, no," she gasped. It would take her that long to get home. Time to run.

~~~\\\/~~~

Light knocked on the door for a second time. Where the hell could she be? He had taken it for granted that she was at home when he texted her.

Suddenly the door swung open. There she stood looking tired and harried as ever. She seemed out of breath too as if she had been running.

"Hi!" she squeaked.

"Hi," he replied, holding up the bag of food. "Hungry? Since I was passing by I stopped in for carry out."

"Come in," she invited him, stepping out of the way. "Hot green tea?"

"Yes, please," he replied, taking off his shoes.

Sachiko disappeared around the corner, most likely to turn on the electric water kettle, then reappeared almost running into him.

"Sorry," she gushed, sidestepping him to avoid touching him.

Suddenly he found it difficult to believe this was the same woman who had held his hand, leaned on his shoulder, and rode on his back last night. He sighed, hoping all of his hard work had not been all for nothing.

She was back to her bumbling, awkward self. The barriers had gone back up. The Frigid Queen had gone back into the deep freeze. Damn, damn, damn.

She gathered her books spread over the length of the counter setting them on one of the empty bookshelves. Returning to the kitchen, she stood on her tiptoes to reach the cups in the cabinet.

With her back to him, Light was permitted to get an unobstructed view of her body. The white stretch pants she wore looked as if they had been painted onto her long, skinny legs. Her calves flexed under her pants as she bounced on her tiptoes. When she extended her arm, reaching further into the cabinet for a second cup, her loose gray t-shirt lifted enough for him to see the lower half of her taut, round bottom. From what he could see of her body, finally unhindered by oversized clothing, she looked pretty nice. A little underweight but toned.

Seeing her struggling and failing to retrieve the cup, Light walked around the counter to offer his assistance since he was a few inches taller than her. He stood behind her, being careful not to touch her when he grabbed the cup.

"Here," he said, purposely handing her the cup rather than sitting it on the counter.

"Thank you," she murmured, her fingertips brushing his when she took it from him.

Light leaned close to her to see how she would react. She did not try to get away from him nor did she move toward him. She did not appear distressed or thrilled by his closeness.

The scent of something sweet like pure sugar tickled his nose. He inhaled a little deeper to catch more of the interesting aroma. Vanilla mingled with the sweetness making him think of cake.

"Mmmm cupcake," he murmured.

"Yes, muffin," she rejoined, giving him a a sly, almost sexy, smile.

"What?" he asked, sincerely befuddled.

"Hey, you started it," she shot back defensively, lifting her face toward his.

The smell grew stronger as if it were leaking out of her pores. Maybe it was because she warmed at the realization of the proximity of her lips to his. She quickly turned away from him, taking the lid off of the cermic canister holding the tea bags.

Light smiled to himself while she pretended to focus on fixing their tea. The blush across her face and throat continued around the back of her neck, darkening in color as it spread. The Ice Queen had not frozen over after all.

"There are cupcakes in the refrigerator if you want one," she offered, self-consciously rubbing the back of her neck.

Could she feel him staring at her? If so, good. He wanted to make her feel uncomfortable, unsettled. At least she would be responding to his attention. Perhaps even in a positive way.

Last night she had moments of being enticing and coquettish. The way just flirted with him about the pet names was adorable. Her occasional bouts of bashfulness were totally cute too.

 _Oh, my god...what the hell is happening to me?,_ he ruminated, opening the refrigerator door.

"Dessert before lunch, huh?" he pondered aloud.

"Why not?" she countered, pouring the water into their cups. "It's not like it will ruin your appetite or something. Not after what I saw last night."

"You're one to talk after the ten pounds of junk food you scarfed down. I've never seen a woman eat like you do."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Depends on what you look like in ten years."

"Hmmm," she hummed thoughtfully, placing their cups on the counter.

He expected her to start an argument over that comment, but she refrained.

A half dozen cupcakes in a plastic bakery container sat in the middle of the top shelf. He grabbed the container and sat it on the counter to pop the lid so he could get a good look at them. He wasn't a big fan of confections but these looked amazing. Miniature white cakes with a covering of white icing resembling a ribbon swirled around the topped. A masterfully sculpted yellow lily decorated each cupcake. The artistry in sugar extended to including such details as the tiny little anthers, pistils, and stamens on a real lily.

Light carefully picked up a cake, peeling away the mint green paper from around the bottom. Instead of receiving a moutful of cloying, nausea inducing sweetness, he experienced a pleasant sugary delicacy that virtually melted in his mouth - cake and all.

"Wow," he mumbled around another moutful. Once he chewed and swallowed, he asked, "These are fantastic. Where did you get these?"

"I made them," she answered.

"You what?" He stopped in mid-chew. He stared at the cupcake as if it had transformed into a poisonous snake. Then he glanced at her. Pointing at her, asking, "You?" Then he pointed at the half eaten cupcake. "...made this?"

"Yeah. Is it that shocking that I'm actually talented at something?"

"No. I just never imagined...wow." For once in his life he found himself speechless. Besides, there was a cupcake to finish eating.

"You can't have another one until after lunch," she teased him, taking the bowls of ramen out of the bag. "What do you want to do today? Study?"

"How about that walk on the beach?"

~~~\\\/~~~

Sachiko fell asleep on the bus ride to the beach. The cat nap gave her the boost in energy she needed to be able to fully enjoy her visit to one of her favorite places on earth. She took off her shoes at the edge of the boardwalk, pulling her pants up to her knees. Without waiting for Light, she jumped off into the sand running toward the water.

The sea breeze whipped her hair in all directions. The water rushed across the beach, sucking at her toes. Closing her eyes, she outstretched her arms reveling in the sound of the roaring waves. She adored that sound.

She had always been able to find her peace here, finding her sanity in an insane world. Pretending the waves rolled into shore to remove her troubles, taking them out to the vast blue sea to be drowned, to never bother her again.

Sachiko screamed when Light grabbed her around the waist and swung her around, playfully threatening to throw her out into the water. This time his attempt at impishness did not seem contrived, therefore, coming off as bizarre behavior. She was still laughing like a madwoman when he sat her down on her feet in front of him. Her laughter gradually died away when he took both of her hands in his, gazing down at her earnestly.

"What?" she chuckled, growing a bit self-conscious under his close scrutiny.

His eyes moved over her face as if he were searching for something, some imperfection, some reason to reject her and never talk to her again. Her anxiety increased, making her want to run because she felt vulnerable. His hands tightened around hers when she tried to pull away.

"What is it?" she asked, her voice wavering due to her rising unease.

"Sachiko, don't run from me," he murmured, his voice low and pleading.

"I wasn't - "

"Don't lie. I can see the panic in your eyes. Don't run." He repeated, placing his palm against her cheek.

Sachiko closed her eyes. Her whole body shaking. "Light, please..."

"I won't hurt you." He slid his other arm around her waist, pulling her into his body.

Sachiko wanted to believe him. Her arms, hanging free at her sides, strived to automatically lift and wrap around his neck. Resisting the temptation to return the embrace, she stubbornly kept her arms at her sides. She could not trust him yet. She had allowed in too far already.

 _Not another step. No! Not one!,_ she screamed in her head. Despite her vehement internal protests from that little voice she could not identify, she felt her arms going around him, cinching around his waist to press her body harder into his.

 _That's far enough,_ the voice warned, defeat echoing through the words. _No further or you'll regret it._

Too late. She already did. The water swirled around her feet. Her safe haven no longer felt safe. The water sucked away the sand from under her feet, giving her the sensation that she was being pulled into something dangerous. A mysterious gravitational field was dragging her into a vortex from which she would not escape. But weren't black holes a void in space not even light can escape?


	11. Chapter 11: The Angel of Light

On Monday morning, Sachiko slid into the classroom at exactly 8:06. Her hip bumped Light's shoulder when she swung around to sit down in her desk seat.

"Good morning, cupcake," Light greeted her in a whisper.

"There's three left in my refrigerator. Want me to bring them to you tomorrow?" she asked, ignoring his rakish grin.

"I can stop by tonight after cram school."

Sachiko's head whipped around so fast for a second she thought it might snap right off her neck. _I'd rather you didn't._

"It will be around nine when you get out of cram school won't it? That will be too late."

"Mr. Yagami," the teacher interrupted before Light could utter an argumentative response. "Please translate passages twelve through fifteen from second Corinthians eleven."

Sachiko had no idea why the teacher had chosen the Bible as their text for this month's English translation in literature. She quickly snatched the black leather bound book out of her backpack, flipping to the correct chapter to read along.

Light stood up, inhaling deeply as if preparing to deliver a dramatic speech. There was no end to his showmanship. He acted like he was always on stage.

 _"All the world's a stage. And all the men and women merely players."_ The quote from William Shakespeare's play _As You Like It_ came to mind. Several of Shakespeare's plays had been the subject of translation last month. She could not wait until next month to find out what literary gems lie ahead.

If the world is a stage and everyone are the players, Light qualified as a leading man. She, on the other hand, barely made the cut as scenery. The role life had chosen for her suited her fine. She preferred being part of the background; remaining unnoticed, being left alone. For some reason, Light seemed to want to shift her into the role of supporting cast, _his_ support.

"...for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light*," he read in exquisite English. "It is not surprising, then, if his servants also masquerade as servants of righteousness their end will be what their actions deserve.*"

 _Masquerades as an angel of light,_ she mused, her eyes scanning his handsome face. Masquerade. Hiding behind a mask.

While she studied his face, an odd little grin played at the edges of his lips before they tilted into a malevolent smirk. Sachiko shook her head. Her imagination must be working overtime due to her lack of sleep.

"Masquerading as an angel of light," the teacher repeated. "What do you think that means, Mr. Yagami?"

"Satan used a mask, hiding behind a guise of good to deceive and manipulate people," he said confidently.

 _Takes one to know one,_ that annoying little mystery voice whispered from her deepest consciousness.

"Yes, thank you, Mr. Yagami," the teacher said, his eyes shifting to Sachiko. "Satan actually began as an angel of light by the name of Lucifer. However, he was cast from heaven by God for committing a sin. Miss Sugiyama, please tell the class his sin that led to his downfall."

Sachiko looked away when Light gave her a sidelong glance.

"Pride," she answered flatly, feeling Light's eyes on her.

"Correct."

 _Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall_.** The words from one of last week's passages skidded through her brain.

Sachiko cast a furtive glimpse at Light when he sat down. He exuded self-assurance, convinced that he was indestructible. Seeing his confidence made her want to believe it too. However, if the highest angel of the Hebrew God fell prey to his own pride surely this man could as well. By sight, she could not spot a single weakness in him. Except his ego. One day his rampant pride would be his downfall too.

~\\..'../~

At lunch, Sachiko sneaked up to the roof. She had to get away from Light, to escape his suffocating gravity. His magnetism simultaneously pulled her in and repelled her at the same time. She wanted to get close to him, to allow in the warm, fuzzy feelings that rose inside of her when he came near her. However, there were moments of clarity unhindered by illogical feelings. In those times, the mystifying voice from inside would speak to her, and she would pull away. Maybe she was simply schizophrenic. Whatever the source of the voice, she listened. There was still too much she did not know about Light, therefore, she could not allow herself to trust him.

 _Is it always going to be like this?,_ she questioned herself silently.

Leaning on her elbows on the flat top of the brick wall, Sachiko scanned the ground below. Although it wasn't that high up, everything looked small and unreal like toys.

What did Light see from the tower he had made for himself out of his ego? Did everyone look tiny and insignificant to him? Like play things instead of real people with real lives?

A small flock of crows flew into one of the trees below. It must be glorious. The freedom to fly through the sky, feathers and wind carrying you wherever you want to go, whenever you want to go. They looked like black dots among the green leaves that were beginning to dry and fall. One more sign of the changing seasons.

Sachiko had once envied the birds. She had prayed a million times for wings to free herself from the prison made by her uncle. Although she never did get those wings, someone had come along giving her a key to open the door of her gilded cage.

Sachiko hopped up on the wall not caring that the rough edges of the bricks cut into her knees. Shakily, wavering and holding her arms out like a tight rope walker, she stood to her feet on wide flat surface of the top. She closed her eyes, raising her face to the sky. The sun warmed her skin, the breeze stroked her cheeks. Leaning forward, the fear of falling seized her, causing her to sway unsteadily.

She wanted to fall in love with Light. Why is it called _falling_ in love? Floating weightlessly through space seemed like such a pleasant concept. Falling was easy, painless. The problem was the sudden, hard stop at the bottom. She could not fathom the brutal impact awaiting her should she allow herself to plunge headfirst into love with Light.

Something spooked the birds, making them take flight on their iridescent black wings, issuing angry caws of protest on their way. Falling would not be so scary with wings.

Strong fingers enclosed her wrist in a bone crushing grip. She yelped when her arm was jerked so hard she feared it might be wrenched out of socket. Then she was in fact, falling backwards away from the edge. However, her behind suffered no painful damage by hitting the cement rooftop. Instead she landed on something solid with a fair amount of give to it.

"Oomph," Light grunted. His arms coiled around her waist when they were both sitting safely on the ground, her situated sideways in his lap. "Are you crazy? What the hell were you doing?"

"No, I'm not crazy. And I'm not suicidal either," she snapped, trying to wiggle out of his lap. "I wasn't trying to kill myself if that's what you were thinking."

"You scared the hell out of me," he panted, his furious gaze trained on her face.

A tingling warmth surged inside of Sachiko like hot needles poking her organs. Shame. The unspoken but evident reproach in his eyes made her want to shrink to the size of a tiny ant and crawl away. He held her captive with his embrace and his gaze. She dropped her chin to her chest to hide her face since she could not escape any other way.

"Hey," he said quietly, lifting her chin with his forefinger to make her look at him.

"Light, don't," she murmured, pushing her chin back down against his finger.

"I see you," he whispered in her ear.

His lips grazing the outer curve of her ear made her heart beat faster but caused her to hold her breathe.

"What?" she rasped, raising her head of her own volition to look into his eyes.

"I. See. You," he repeated slowly, transforming each word into a sentence. He pressed his palms to her cheeks to hold her face steady so she could not avert her eyes. "Do you know what I see?"

"I have no idea," she mumbled, her eyes moving back and forth between his instead of focusing on them directly.

"You're beautiful. But you're broken," he murmured, using one hand to cup the back of her head.

 _Here we go,_ she thought, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. _Let the insults begin!_

"You're broken, shattered into pieces. Beautifully broken but not hopelessly destroyed." His lips edged closer to hers. "I want to help put you back together."

Oh, such lovely words. They coated her soul like honey, thick and sweet. So sweet it made her nauseated.

On the surface, he appears unmarried. An ideal example of humanity. Handsome, brilliant, cultured. Aloof and unflappable. A shining star, a sun, in a galaxy of humans. She would be the equivalent of Pluto in his galaxy.

 _Why me?_ Her eyelids drifted closed. She could feel the nearness of his lips to hers. A prickling sensation from the heat of his mouth, the anticipation of his kiss, made her lips tingle.

He called her broken. She would compare him to a diamond. Lustrous, multi-faceted, gorgeous, a priceless gem. Yet deep inside, invisible to the naked eye, there lay a destructive imperfection. So deep in fact, she doubted Light knew it was there. Like a flawed diamond, a little pressure exerted on that crack in the wrong way, or the right way depending on how you look at it, would cause the whole gem to crumble into worthless bits.

Sachiko grabbed Light's arms, preparing to push him away when his lips grazed hers with a barely perceptible touch. She held her breath when the pressure became more firm, testing the waters so to speak, checking to see if he could go further.

"Hey! You kids!" an outraged voice yelled. Probably belonging to a teacher.

Sachiko flinched as if she had been shot while Light slowly turned his head in the direction of the voice. The large man dressed in gym clothes stood with his hands on his hips, glowering at them suspiciously.

"Is everything okay up here?" he asked pinning his wary eyes on Light. "I was told there was someone standing on the edge of the roof."

"Everything is fine," Sachiko assured him, jumping to her feet. She brushed off the fine gravel from the roof that stuck to her dress and legs.

"Are you sure?" Mr. Nimura inquired. The physical education teacher still looked unconvinced. His eyes never moved from Light, keeping a close eye on the boy while he stood.

"I'm sure," she insisted, standing in front of Light to be between him and the teacher. Mr. Nimura resembled an angry bull ready to charge at any moment.

"Was he bothering you, Sugiyama?"

"No, he's - " _What is he? What do I say? He's not my -_

Light interrupted her racing thoughts, providing an answer for her as to his classification.

"I'm her boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" Sachiko and Mr. Nimura queried at the same time, both dubious of the validity of the claim.

"Boyfriend," Light confirmed, stepping up beside her to put his arm around her waist.

"Sugiyama?" The coach waited for her answer, his arms folded over his broad chest.

"Y-yes, s-sir," she stammered in reply. "He's my boyfriend."

"Well, even so, you two don't need to up here doing..." He paused, raising a bushy eyebrow. "Whatever it is you were doing. That's not allowed on school grounds."

"Y-yes, s-sir," she stuttered nervously.

The bell rang, signalling the end of lunch. Sachiko sighed in relief. Literally saved by the bell.

"Get to class," Mr. Nimura ordered them.

~~~\\\/~~~

 _This is why I need her,_ Light reasoned to himself.

Recently, frustrations had started to rise making him question why he continued to strive with her. This little incident affirmed why he was jumping through these ridiculous hoops for her. On the rare instance someone held suspicions against him he could not dispel, she would be there to put their doubts to rest.

Yet there were those fleeting moments when he genuinely enjoyed her company. During those unexpected instances, an unsettling flutter in the tummy, an unwanted quickening of his heartbeat would occur giving him reason to pause. Occasionally, a tender feeling crept over him bringing with it an affection for her. He found it to be quite disturbing.

Light took her by the hand, leading her from the roof under the teacher's close scrutiny. He had just experienced one of those uncommon incidents that could be construed as falling in love with her. The desire to kiss her had been genuine. He _wanted_ to kiss her. Her not pushing him away had made him feel a rush of elation. Plain, pure happiness. But only for an instant.

After walking past Mr. Nimura, he glanced back to glare at the man. Then that guy appeared and killed the moment. Light had felt like he had been doused with cold water when their kiss was interrupted. In his anger, the idea formed in his brain to write the teacher's name in the Death Note. But he could not be petty or stupid. Acting on emotional decisions are how major errors in judgment are made.

Besides, writing his name in the notebook would be murder. Mr. Nimura had not committed a criminal act in ruining the seductive interlude meant to lure Sachiko further into his web. Light refused to lower himself to foolish, immature acts. Such uncouth, narrow minded behavior would lead to mistakes; mistakes he could not afford in his effort to create his utopian society.

Justice should be served to those whose deplorable actions caused devastating hurt or loss to others. The destruction of innocent souls must stop. Righteous judgment no longer existed in this world. The laws have become skewed, the 'justice' system hopelessly corrupt. True fairness and legitimate retribution were extinct. He planned to right the wrongs of that sorely lacking system by using his own form of justice.

Light stole a glimpse at Sachiko, squeezing her small hand tucked inside of his. She possessed an inherent sadness about her even when she wore a smile on her face. At least she no longer shook like a leaf when he touched her. He wanted to stop her pain. He would give her the justice she needed and give her offender what he deserved.

Light intended to cure this entire despondent world from its festering sickness of bleak injustice. Someone had to do it. He could not think of anyone better than himself for the job.

* * *

 _"Hell is full of good intentions or desires."_

Saint Bernard of Clairvaux (1091-1153)

* * *

*2 Corinthians 14&15 New International Version

**Proverbs 16:18


	12. Chapter 12: Shared Secrets

Sachiko lay on her belly on her futon, books spread all around her. She had just completed reading the third and final chapter of the history assignment when there was a knock on her door. Grabbing her phone, she checked the time. 9:10. Must be Light making good on his threat to stop by after cram school.

She hopped to her feet, grabbing her ratty pink bathrobe to pull it on. Dressed only in a tank top and her itty bitty pajama shorts would not be an appropriate way to answer the door. She opened the door to see him standing there in a black pullover shirt and jeans.

"Wow," she murmured, marveling at the sight of him in a pair of jeans.

"Hi to you too," he said, giving her his million dollar smile. "Can I come in? I won't stay long. I have some things I need to do before I get to bed."

Her insides heated when he flashed her that smile. She turned to the side, allowing him entrance into her apartment. Only the tiniest bit of apprehension caused her belly to tighten when he passed by her. Being close to him was getting easier.

Light dropped his messenger bag in the foyer beside the athletic shoes he kicked off. He proceeded to enter the kitchen going to the refrigerator as naturally and easily as if he lived there.

"Have you eaten?" he asked her, taking two bottles of water from the shelf.

"Yes," she replied, taking the bottle he held out to her. "You're awfully comfortable here, aren't you?"

"I am your boyfriend after all," he rejoined, adding a mischievous sideways smile. He was getting better at the whole flirtation thing. He wore the grin of playful salaciousness well.

"Okay then," she murmured, bringing the bottle of water to her lips. It was then she realized she had not even taken the top off. Her face instantly became engulfed in the hot flames of embarrassment when Light laughed at her.

"Sometimes I don't know what to think about you," he chuckled, taking the bottle from her to twist off the cap.

"Yeah, I know how you feel," she mumbled, snatching the now open bottle out of his hand. The urge to dump the bottle of cold water over her burning hot head was tempting but she refrained and drank it instead.

Suddenly Light grew serious, picking at the label on his water bottle.

"What is it?" she asked, anxiety rising within her until her lungs started to restrict the air flow into her body.

"I want you tell me something. Just one thing. About him," he said, avoiding making eye contact with her.

"Hmmm," Sachiko hummed, walking away from him.

She opened the glass sliding door to allow the chill night air into the suddenly stuffy and smaller than usual apartment. When she still could not breathe easily, she stepped out onto the postage stamp sized balcony. There was enough room for a single chair, a tiny table, and for her to stand. Despite the lack of space, she felt Light come out behind her standing close to her yet not touching her body.

"I'll tell you as much as I can. Things with him weren't always bad. There were good times. I find it difficult to remember that myself. The bad always overshadows the good," she murmured, setting the water bottle down on the little table by the plastic chair.

"My parents died when I was ten. My mom was British. My dad was Japanese. They met at Oxford University. We lived in England until I was eight. Then we moved here."

~~~\\\/~~~

 _That explains a lot,_ Light thought to himself.

It explained so much about her looks. Her white skin and innumerable freckles, her spiral curls, and her large, round eyes in particular.

He liked her eyes, mostly because they were so expressive. Being a metaphorical open book made her emotional state easy to read allowing him to adjust his words and actions accordingly. Every thought was clearly documented for him to see in those great big doe eyes. She could not hide the most random inkling that ran through her brain.

The reason she labored so strenuously in her studies became apparent to him. Although she might speak fluent Japanese, she undoubtedly struggled with the written language. She was forced to translate everything from Japanese to English in her brain before she could begin to comprehend anything she read. No wonder she spent so many hours toiling away in her books.

Light waited for her to elaborate on her parents. Perhaps she would recount a nostalgic memory from childhood, giving him insight into her past. What kind of people were her parents? Maybe she would tell him how they died. Unfortunately, she divulged nothing so deeply emotional about her childhood or her parents.

"My uncle, my mother's brother, came with us when we moved here. My parents owned a business, and he worked for them. He even lived with us. He and I had always been close, like brother and sister. After their death, he thought it best to stay here, as not to uproot me and make things more difficult. " Her shoulders dropped and rolled forward as if she were collapsing inward.

Light lay his hand on her sloped shoulder feeling the slight tremor in her body. His fingers kneaded the tense muscles gently in an effort to comfort her while encouraging her to go on.

"He took over my parent's business. He was young and it was very stressful suddenly becoming the president of the company and a single parent overnight."

 _Why is she making excuses for that bastard?,_ Light wondered silently _,_ digging his fingers into her stiff muscles _. He inherited the business, eh? That could have been a motive for murder,_ he mused.

Light stayed silent, keeping his suspicions to himself. Obviously the thought had never occurred to her and planting it in her head now would only hurt her more.

"He's only thirteen years older than me. So he really was like my brother. I adored him. I loved him so much. He was like a god to me. "

Light winced upon hearing her refer to another man as a god. Especially such a heinous individual. He inhaled a deep breath, forcing himself to breathe slowly and calmly.

"Things were okay until a few months after my twelfth birthday. My body had begun to change. He noticed," Sachiko stated flatly. "He started giving me these looks. Long, hungry stares. At the time I didn't know what they meant." She drew in a shaky breath, raising her face to the full moon.

Light noticed she did that when thoughts and feelings weighed too heavily on her. She looked to be offering her emotional load up to whatever higher being might take pity on her and free her of the burden. He stepped closer to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and chest to hold her with her back pressed against his chest. Amazingly, she did not tense up. Instead, she leaned into his body, allowing him to support her.

"It was the subtle things I tried to shrug off as nothing. The hugs that lasted too long. The kisses strategically placed too close to the corners of my mouth to seem innocent and familial but hinting at more. He showered me with gifts and attention. He even took me out to expensive dinners. What teenage girl wouldn't like that? If only I had known..." she scoffed derisively.

She was berating herself for not understanding the initial, subtle signals of an impending problem. A pedophile masquerading as a loving uncle, taking advantage of a child. Yet she was angry at herself for not knowing, not stopping him.

"It's not your fault," Light whispered in her ear, sliding his other arm around her waist.

"I didn't realize he was treating me as a girlfriend instead of his niece. I attended office parties with him. He wore me on his arm like an accessory. Like cuff links or something," she laughed shortly. The sound was sharp, scornful, tainted with her anger and bitterness.

"You were a child. How were you supposed to know he was treating you in a way he shouldn't? That's enough. Stop talking," Light murmured in a low, hypnotic voice directly into her ear when she started to shudder. "That's enough for tonight. Not another word."

Light loosened his arms to permit her to turn in his embrace. His arms tightened around her when she pressed her face into his chest. She was not crying, but she was definitely distressed. She had every reason to be upset. He did not want to hear the specifics of what happened to her. He did not even want to think about it. Yet she lived with the memories every damn day.

"What's his name?" he asked, squeezing her in an effort to comfort her. It was the only thing he could do at the moment to assuage her suffering. But soon...

"Julian Howell Thornton the third," she answered with a mirthless chuckle. "It sounds so pretentious, doesn't it?"

"It does," he agreed, cradling the back of her head with his hand when she nestled her face into the crook of his neck. He gently massaged her neck in small circles using his thumb and ring finger. "Do you have a picture of your family?"

"Sure. Hang on," she said, reluctantly pulling away from him to go get it.

 _Yes! Finally! I can get rid of him tonight,_ he thought, impatiently waiting for her return. He could hear her opening the lid of the wooden box, shifting around its contents.

"Here," she said, extending a square photograph with scalloped edges to him.

It was a novelty picture in black and white meant to look like an antique photo. They were dressed in Victorian garb straight from the 19th century. She looked to be about seven which would be three years before her parents died. Clothed in a frilly, low waisted dressed and button up boots, she was a pretty child with smiling eyes. Big bows had been placed on either side of her head amid her spiral curls.

Her mother stood beside her with a hand resting lovingly on her shoulder. The woman looked like an older version of her daughter. She wore a dress that covered her from her chin to her feet, not even showing her shoes. Her straight hair had been pulled back into a low bun under her veiled hat.

Sachiko's father had protective arm around his wife's waist, holding her close to his side. Dressed in a three piece suit with a bow tie, his hair slicked back, and a fake, pencil thin mustache applied to complete the look. Every bit a charming gentleman, happy husband, and doting father.

Then the uncle. The god. The bastard. He was dressed in light colored pants, wide striped jacket, and bow tie like a late 19th century university student. He wore a straw boater hat tipped at a dashing angle on his light haired, possibly blond, head. The cocksure, lopsided grin on the man's face angered Light. He looked so damn smug and self-righteous. He was about twenty in this picture.

"So that's him, huh?" Light mumbled to himself but loud enough for her to hear.

"That's him," Sachiko confirmed, taking the picture from him to put it away. "I only keep it because my parents are in the picture. I can't even bring myself to cut him out of it. We were a happy family. He wasn't a monster then either."

Light glanced at his watch to see that it was ten til ten. He needed to be getting home anyway. There was work to be done. She had given him the two important pieces of information necessary to enable the Death Note to do its work and exact justice for her.

"You should go to bed. You need more sleep than you're getting. It's important for your health and your grades to get proper sleep," he said, touching her cheek with the tips of his fingers.

"Yeah, I know," she sniffled, closing and locking the glass door after he walked inside.

"I know you have a job," he announced, watching her back stiffen, going ramrod straight.

She had given that little piece of information away herself by saying she made those cupcakes packaged in a plastic container used only in professional establishments. At first he thought she was lying , that she had simply bought them at the grocery store. However, she had beamed with pride upon admitting she had made them. Her pride had led her to accidentally divulge an important secret.

"You won't tell will you? I have to work. To live," she said without turning around to look at him.

"I know. I won't say anything. You've trusted your deepest secrets to me." He went to her, taking her by the arm to turn her to face him. "One day I'll tell you my most important secret. When I think you're ready."

"You don't have to. I know what a private person you are."

"You're sweet, cupcake," he murmured, lowering his head swiftly to catch her lips before she could inch away from him.

Her lips were like velvet, compliant and accepting of his kiss. His abdominal muscles seized, forming a hard knot of excitement. He kept the kiss short, not wanting to be too insistent and cause her to draw away from again.

"I better go," he said, his lips hovering over hers. "See you at school tomorrow."

~~~\\\/~~~

Ryuk stood up from where he had been sitting on the sand dune watching everything below. Always such amusing interactions between Light and Sachiko. They entertained him greatly, but he had grown bored waiting.

He stretched, extending his scrawny, lengthy limbs to prepare for his trip down to earth.

"Well, time to go introduce myself," he announced to no one but himself.

"Ryuk!" a voice yelled behind before he could leave.

"Crow," Ryuk sneered.

Crow was not a Shinigami nor a god of any other kind. He was a servant of the crow god Yatagarasu. He could be classified as an angel: a guardian and a protector. The bird-man also thought of himself as an ethereal guidance counselor to those assigned to him by the crow god.

Ryuk had experienced a few run-ins with Crow before. They had shared major differences in opinion when their paths would cross while dealing with the human element of their jobs.

"You stay away from the girl. She belongs to my lord," Crow said, wrapping his wings around his humanoid body like a cloak. He wore a black leather crow mask like the plague doctors of the 18th century. The beak curved and stretched down almost to his belly button hidden under his glossy feathers. The large reflective goggles hid his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah. I have no interest in her. She's kinda boring anyway," Ryuk remarked dismissively.

"You've been warned, Shinigami. If you touch her, there will be hell to pay," he threatened.

"You can't kill me," Ryuk scoffed. "I can't be sent to hell either."

"True on both accounts," Crow agreed. "But a god can kill you. Like my lord, Yatagarasu. Being the god of rebirth, he can bring you back to life. Maybe as a lowly earth creature. Perhaps a pig, so you can live out your interminable days in a fashion you deserve."

"I hear you, Crow," he returned, shrugging his bony shoulders. "The girl was never part of my plan anyway. She's too boring. See ya."

~~~\\\/~~~

Sachiko rammed the deadbolt lock into place when he was gone. Numbness had overtaken her body and brain. Light was right. She needed sleep.

She shuffled to her futon, kicking the books to the side onto the floor. Lying down on the thin mattress covered by a pink sheet, she pulled the black and white comforter over her in hopes it would stop the uncontrollable shivering.

Sachiko could not be sure if she was happy or sad. Actually, there was a total absence of emotion; a foreign concept to her. Usually she had too many emotions bombarding her at once.

Her fingers traced her lips recalling his pleasant, benign kiss. It had felt nice. She had not experienced that sickening sense of wrongness that slithered through her gut every time her uncle had kissed her.

She wondered what kind of profound secret he could be hiding. Maybe he actually studied for hours or bribed teachers for his grades. Perhaps he was a porn addict and had an extensive collection hidden between his mattresses. Did he use make up to create his flawless complexion? She giggled at the thought. Was he gay? Her wild imagination was running away with her making her think silly things.

"Oh, my god," she grumbled, laughing at herself. "Go to sleep."

Sachiko rolled over onto her side, hugging her second pillow to her body. Being in his arms had felt good, soothing. Having him hold her had given her the strength to think about the past without falling apart.

There was a twinge from deep inside of her, reminding her not to get too comfortable with him. She felt like she had said too much, but it was too late to recall the words. He also knew her secret that could get her kicked out of school. It could not be helped now. Whatever he did with the information he knew about her was up to him. She would have to deal with consequences if and when they came.

"Hmmm," she sighed, releasing her misgivings. She needed sleep. "Good night, Light."

Her phone beeped making every muscle in her body clinch. She picked up the phone to see she had a text message.

Light [10:17]: _I'm home. Good night._

Every nerve in her body tingled as if it had received a small electrical shock.

"Okay. That was kinda freaky," she mumbled, pulling her comforter up to her chin when her body started shaking all over again.

~~~\\\/~~~

Sachiko [10:21]: _Good night._

"Hmmm," Light exhaled, putting the phone down on his desk.

He hoped he had not woken her up. She had taken a few minutes to respond which was strange. Shrugging it off, he opened the drawer to retrieve his coveted notebook. He opened the book to a clean page, the sixth one.

A shuffling noise came from the corner of his room. A mouse? Surely not. The exterminators came every month to keep their house bug and vermin free.

Light picked up the remote to his television, turning it on. In the white blue illumination stood a tall figure with long, skinny arms and legs, wide bony shoulders, and face like a killer clown.

"Jesus Christ! What the hell?!" Light exclaimed, falling off of his chair. The back of his head banged the wall with a painful thud.

The thing laughed. A raspy cackle of dark glee leaked out of his gaping maw lined by rows of yellowed shark like teeth. He had a smashed pig nose in the middle of his white face. His bulging red irises set in a jaundiced sclera fixed themselves on Light.

The creature looked to be about eight feet tall including the lengthy, gravity defying black hair that stood straight up from his head. He had to hunch over to fit into the room, the tips of his hair scraping the ceiling. His clothing was like S&M meets drag queen with lots of black leather and feathers around the neck of his shirt. Silver rings punctured his skin around the wide open v-neck of the shirt attaching it to his body.

"Well, well, Light, it's so nice to meet you. You're an interesting guy," he said, a creepy Cheshire cat grin stretching his black lips.

"Who the hell are you? _What_ the hell are you?" Light corrected himself, getting to his feet. If he was going to have to fight this thing, he could not do it sitting on the floor.

"Light!" his mother called, knocking on the door. "Are you all right?"

Light believed he was hallucinating or dreaming until he heard his mother's voice. Painfully awake, he blinked at the living nightmare standing in front of him beaming down at him like a crazed mental asylum escapee.

"Light?" she called again.

"I'm fine, Mom. I tripped over the charging cord to my phone," he lied easily and convincingly

"Honey, do you need something? Tea? Warm milk?"

"No. I'm fine. Sorry about the noise."

"Don't stay up too late studying. It's important you get your sleep," she said.

Light listened to the sound of her slippers shuffling away from his door. He waited for the muted thunk of the door closing to his parents' room before he spoke again.

"Well, answer my questions," he demanded. The initial shock of seeing the intruder was gone allowing him to act his normal arrogant self.

"My name is Ryuk," the thing answered, placing a hand over his heart. "I am a Shinigami."

"Shinigami?"

"Of course. That is my notebook you have." The scarecrow like Shinigami moved to pick the notebook up from the desk. He flipped through the pages. "My, my, someone's been a busy boy. I'm glad you like my gift."

"Why me?"

"Huh?" The death god replaced the notebook on the desk, backing up into his corner again.

"Why did you choose me? What was your reason for giving me the notebook?" Light sat down at his desk, choosing a pen from the cup on his desk.

"You think I chose you specifically? Heh, don't flatter yourself," Ryuk snorted derisively. "It was only a happy cosmic accident that you found the notebook. You weren't the first one to see it, you know. You were only the first one to claim it as your own."

"So are you here to take the notebook back? To claim my soul?" he asked, looking up at the Shinigami.

"No. Not tonight. When I think the time is right I will write your name down in my Death Note," Ryuk explained, patting the book held in the holster attached to his thin waist. A large silver cross dominated the front of the leather pouch.

"When I die, will I go to heaven or hell?"

"Neither. You will be excommunicated to a place somewhere in between. Any human who uses the Death Note has no place in neither heaven nor hell."

"Could you move, please?" Light could not see the television because the Shinigami stood in the way.

"Can't wait to fill up another page, eh, Light?" Ryuk laughed.

"Somebody needs to save this rotten world," he replied, studying the name that flashed on the screen under the video of the man being led to a police car in handcuffs.

"So you're the god who will save this world?"

"Of course I am," he returned, annoyed by the Shinigami's questions. "I'm busy. But there are some things about the Death Note I would like to discuss with you later. Now, stay quiet so my family doesn't hear you."

"Only you can see and hear me, Light," he informed the intense young man. "Oh, and anyone who touches that notebook."

"I'll keep that in mind," Light said, putting his pen to the paper to write the name of the prisoner from the newscast.

By the time the late night rundown of the latest convicted criminals from all over the world was done, Light had filled the page in two neat rows from top to bottom. Not wanting to start another page because he would feel like he had left work undone, he closed the book. His girlfriend's uncle would be first on the list tomorrow night.

"My girlfriend," he chuckled.

Julian Howell Thornton III. The man sounded like an asshole by his name alone.

Light glanced at the corner to see that it was empty. Good. The Shinigami was gone. Ryuk was going to be a pain in the ass to get used to.

Time for bed. He desperately needed his sleep.


	13. Chapter 13: Jealousy

Stories of the incident on the rooftop made their way around the school faster than a wildfire burns through a drought stricken forest. The most inflammatory piece of information about the event was the revelation of Light Yagami declaring Sachiko Sugiyama to be his girlfriend.

In an instant, Sachiko became the most hated girl in school. Eyes full of resentment and loathing stabbed her with sharp daggers when she walked down the halls. Small minds combined with petty envy caused a resurgence of sketchy gossip about her and Mr. Okada.

Jealousy made the girls bold, vindictive, and just plain stupid. They openly flirted with Light in front of Sachiko. They surrounded him like swarms of bees in the classroom, in the hallway, wherever they could corner him.

Too proud to lower herself to their level, refusing to act like an insecure girlfriend, Sachiko would stick her nose into the air and walk by as if she did not see any of them, including Light. When she snubbed him with a such a haughty attitude, Light exacerbated the situation by physically breaking through the mob to follow her.

Other than the rising conflict as school, the rest of her life had settled into a nice little routine. Light stopped by her apartment every Monday night after cram school. On Tuesdays they studied in the library. On Wednesday, he went straight home from cram school but called or texted upon his arrival. Thursdays entailed another study session at her apartment. Friday nights were free for each of them to do as they pleased apart from each other. Saturday afternoons and Sundays were spent together, taking walks in the park, visiting a museum, eating out, or whatever distraction suited their fancy.

Then there was work. She fit sleep in as best as she could between everything else. At last, she had a full happy life. Never in her wildest dreams would she have thought she would find it with Light. He was making it difficult for her not to fall for him.

On this particular morning, Sachiko arrived early to class to find four girls surrounding Light. He was sitting at his desk reading, acting completely unaware of their presence. But they talked to him anyway. They giggled too much. So annoying. Yet he remained unmindful of their flirting.

One girl rested her hand on Light's shoulder. Another girl put her hand on his forearm. They're touching him! Way too bold. Today was the day she had reached her limit. A person can only be pushed so far before the time came to fight or flee the situation. She had no intention of running.

Raising her chin, sticking her nose in the air like a haughty princess, she sashayed toward her desk. Shouldering one girl out of the way, she pretended to trip and thrust out her hand as if to catch herself resulting in 'accidentally' slapping the other girl across the face.

"Hey!" yelled the girl she slapped. The stunned girl pressed her hand against her injured cheek, glowering at Sachiko.

"Watch where you're going!" shrieked the other who had received a push.

Sachiko received an unexpected shove to her chest. Stumbling backwards, she lost her balance yet somehow turned to land on top of her desk. Unable to find her footing, her body crumpled, jamming her rib cage into the sharp edge of the top of the desk.

The jolt of searing pain in her ribs made her grit her teeth. Her back pack fell from her limp arm, hitting the floor with a dull thump. Standing up from her half prone position over the top of her desk, Sachiko tucked the stray hair that had come loose from her ponytail back over her ear.

"You are in my way," Sachiko warned the furious flirt, returning her murderous glare dagger for dagger.

"All right everyone! Sit down and be quiet!" exclaimed the teacher, walking into the classroom. His eyes widened briefly upon noting the stand off that definitely looked like a cat fight waiting to happen. "To your desks ladies! So nice of you to join us on time this morning, Miss Sugiyama. Four days in a row. That's a record for you. Mr. Yagami you're having a good influence on your punctuality impaired girlfriend."

A nervous titter of laughter rolled through the classroom like a wave. Tension rose in the wake of the laughter as palpable as the low hum of electricity from the florescent lights.

"Sachi, are you all right?" Light inquired, touching her side.

Sachiko jumped as much from the surge of pain as she did to avoid his touch. The rib didn't feel broken just bruised. She had experienced both before.

Light had taken to calling her Sachi recently. Only the people closest to her, the few she allowed in beyond her barrier, called her that.

"I'm fine," she snapped in return.

"Lunch on the roof like always?"

"Yeah. Sure."

"I need to talk to you about something."

 _Shit. He wants to talk. Nothing good ever comes out of someone telling you they need to talk._

* * *

~\\..'../~

"I've got to get something from my locker. I'll meet you up there," Sachiko told Light after the bell rang for lunch.

"Okay," he said, leaning over to kiss her forehead. "See you soon."

She flinched away from him, giving him an apologetic smile. The heat of the envious stares burned straight through her.

Jealousy could be such an ugly emotion. Life at school sure had become more hostile lately. The enmity showed no signs of letting up either. The four girls from this morning surrounded her when she bent to retrieve the lunch she had made for herself and Light.

"Hey, bitch," the blond leader of the foursome hissed at her, poking her in the back with a bony finger. "Who the hell do you think you are? Where do you get off disrespecting us like that?"

 _Are you going to let her do this to you? Aren't you sick of getting pushed around, of taking everyone's shit and being a victim?,_ her inner voice nagged.

Sachiko pushed the insulated bag containing the drinks and sandwiches back into her locker. Yes. She was fed up with people who thought it was okay to bully her and take advantage of her.

Last night Sachiko had received a phone call from Mr. Okada. He told her something she definitely did not want to hear. Her uncle would be returning from the United States soon. She would no longer be safe.

Julian had been living there for the last year setting up an expansion to the business, a new manufacturing facility. Although her uncle had not called her in the last year to check on her, when he returned she had no doubt he would come to find her. Her blissful freedom from his predatory ways had ended.

And he would be angry. She had ran away. Defied him. The time had come for her to stand up for herself. This seemed like a good place to begin.

"Hey, space case! Are you even listening to me?" The blonde's high-pitched, nasally voice grated on Sachiko's nerves making her visibly shudder. Apparently she had been jabbering for a minute or two.

"No, actually I wasn't," Sachiko answered honestly. "You're not important enough for me to listen to you."

Perhaps she had been a little bit too honest. Four pairs of shock widened eyes stared her in response to her bitchy frankness. She glanced from girl to girl, wondering what in the hell they were thinking trying to come on to Light. Hair dyed colors outside of the realm of nature, orange tinged fake tans, too much jewelry, and too much make-up. Each one of them looked like a compilation of all the beauty mistakes women make. Did they seriously think Light Yagami would be interested in a single one of them?

Sachiko's eyes fixed themselves on the one who acted as their Queen B. For a moment, the heaps of opalescent sky blue eye shadow caked on the girl's eyelids distracted her. That eye shadow color should have been banned after the 1970's.

"Well, bitch, who do you think you are?" the girl sneered, her hot pink colored top lip peeling away from her teeth. At least her teeth were white and straight.

"I am Light Yagami's girlfriend," Sachiko replied matter-of-factly, a little bit of pride sneaking into her voice and making it sound stronger than she felt. "Something you will never be."

"What the hell?" Queen B's hand retracted to give her a slap.

Sachiko grabbed her wrist, preventing her from landing the blow. Pressing her thumb into the girl's inner wrist between the tendons, she squeezed until she felt the bones move.

The girl dropped to her knees issuing a sharp cry from the shock of pain, but Sachiko did not let go. Mr. Okada had taught her a few self-defense moves. Applying pressure to those nerves made the hand go numb while simultaneously inducing pain throughout the fingers and arm.

"I don't respect you because you don't respect yourself. It's as simple as that," Sachiko growled between her clenched teeth. Releasing the girl's hand, she turned her back to them to grab the lunch she had made for herself and Light. "If you'll excuse me, I have somewhere I need to be. My boyfriend is waiting for me."

~~~\\\/~~~

Light sat on the wall waiting for her. He glanced it his watch. Ten minutes of lunch time had already passed. She sure was taking her sweet time getting up here.

The door creaked open and an amorous couple appeared, arms locked around each others waist, foolish grins on their faces. Their faces reddened, and they giggled like idiots upon seeing they were not alone. They scurried around the corner to hide among the system of huge air conditioning units and massive ducts.

The whole scene made Light uncomfortable and a little queasy. He was glad Sachiko avoided public displays of affection, not feeling the need to be 'lovey-dovey' in view of everyone. Actually, she seemed exceedingly bashful when he did pay attention her, shying away from his most innocent touch when in the presence of others. He was good with that and liked that about her.

The door swung open with a bang. Apparently she had kicked it open. She sure did know how to make an entrance. She carried an insulated lunch bag in her hands and looked furious as she stomped toward him.

"What happened?" Light inquired, curious as to what had kept her and if that was the reason for her otherwise unreasonable anger.

"Sorry about the slight delay. I had to deal with an unexpected trash problem on the way here." She thrust the bag at him, hitting him in the chest.

"Oomph," he grunted. The blow actually knocked the air out of him. "Why are you so angry?"

"Light, I like you and all, but honestly, I just don't know how much more I can take of these insane girls around here," she muttered.

More confused than ever, he questioned her further. "What do you mean?"

"Seriously? You haven't noticed. Suddenly every girl in school believes there's a battle royale to get your attention. They see me as the mark to be taken out to get to you. It's getting to be too much."

'"Are you really going to let those ridiculous girls get to you? The only one I care about is you," he said, taking a big bite of the sandwich she had made this morning at the bakery.

He had no qualms about saying he cared about her because he did. He genuinely cared about her. She was his shield after all, protecting him from all sorts of harm including the females who had become disgustingly brazen. He had definitely noticed the female hysteria surrounding him. He was a target too.

"Do you _really_ care about me?" Her expression conveyed her skepticism. An open book.

"Of course I do." He took another bite of food chewing thoughtfully. "I've got a secret for you."

"Oh, yeah?" she responded, sitting on the wall next to where he stood.

"My mom's name is Sachiko."

~~~\\\/~~~

"Oh?" This personal revelation out of the blue shocked her. Anxiety made her belly quiver. Where could he be going with this? Spouting random thoughts especially of a personal nature were not typical for him. No matter how meaningless the word or deed seemed, Light never did anything without a purpose.

"I want you to meet my parents. What about Saturday night? We can go out to dinner," he suggested.

"Don't you think it's a little soon to meet your parents?"

The wind picked up, chilling her to the bone.

"No. I don't think so. I want to introduce you to them. I plan on being with you for quite a while," he said flatly as if the matter had been set in stone.

Sachiko was stunned into silence. She wondered what other plans he could have for her that she might eventually be informed of.

"Why don't we go shopping tomorrow night? You need to buy some new clothes."

Sachiko felt a little offended by his blunt assessment of her wardrobe, but he was not wrong. She did need new clothes. Most of hers had grown worn and a little shabby. Lately, they were fitting tighter as well. His constant insistence that she eat along with shoving food in her face was making her gain weight.

"Hey, Sachi," he called to her, snapping his fingers in her face to get her attention.

"Hmm?"

"You should eat. Lunch time is almost over."


	14. Chapter 14 When Things Go Bad

"What do you think about this?" Sachiko asked, holding the fuzzy, pastel pink sweater against her body. She rubbed her hand over the soft, cashmere material. "It's so soft."

"It's nice," Light commented, moving closer to her.

"Wanna touch it?" she invited, caressing the material over her belly.

"Oh, yeah, I wanna touch it," he murmured in a way that grabbed her attention immediately.

His eyes glided over her body reminding her of that voracious look in her uncle's eyes. Her muscles tensed from head to toe in preparation for fight or flight. When his hand touched her abdomen, sliding around her waist, she wanted to run.

 _Stay calm. He's your boyfriend. This is okay,_ she reminded herself. Her eyes met his, holding them when his hand pressed to the lower part of her back, pulling her forward. She exhaled noisily when he kissed her forehead, then her cheek.

"Light," she giggled, pushing him away.

"You should buy it. That color looks good on you. It is soft. And sweet. Like you," he said, giving her a flirty smirk.

Oh, that captivating little lopsided grin. He had a way with words better than most famous poets. He said all the right things. Did all the right things. He's so perfect.

She was his opposite in every way. Judging by their looks alone, he did not belong with her. Then there was her awkwardness. Words often eluded her. She would sometimes trip over thin air. Fashionable would never be used to describe her way of dressing. She was glad he had come with her tonight to pick out clothes.

"Ow," she whispered when he poked her forehead.

"You're thinking about the wrong things again. Stop that," he ordered her, displeasure knitting his eyebrows together. "I'm with you because I like you. You're a mess, but you're my mess."

"Thanks?" Heat enveloped her face when he chuckled in response.

"Come on. Let's find you a pair of black pants to go with that sweater."

"Jeans?"

"No. Casual dress pants."

"You're the fashion expert," she muttered following him through the racks.

The pile of clothes grew heavier in her arms. The worry of how she was going to pay for them weighed on her mind as well.

"Light, I don't know if I can afford this," she confessed,glancing at the tags and crunching numbers.

"Don't worry about it. I'll help you," he returned, whirling around to cut her off before she could argue. "You're not asking, I'm offering so don't say no." He turned back around, eyeballing the racks. "One more outfit. For tomorrow night," he said, searching through the rack of shirts in front of him. He picked out a shirt and a pair of pants, asking her to go try them on.

"Fine. Can we leave after this?" she asked, snatching the items from him to lay them on top of the heap.

"Yes. I'll take you out to dinner," he promised her.

"Can we order in instead? I'm really tired."

"Three in the morning was a long time ago wasn't it? Okay. Fine. We'll order in." He took the pile of clothes out of her arms. "As a matter of fact, I'll take these to the register to get ready to check out."

"Thank god," she murmured, going to the dressing room.

Sachiko picked the room to the right at the end of the long hallway with doors on each side. After stripping down to her bra and panties, she studied herself in the mirror. The mirror in her apartment was barely big enough to reflect her from the shoulders up. She hardly ever saw herself in a full length view.

Changes had taken place she had been too busy to notice. Pleasant round curves softened the edges of her body that were once hard angles and sharp bone. Her hair had become silky and smooth. The light tan on skin her skin evened out her freckles making them less harsh and appear less numerous. She patted her tummy that used to be concave but actually poked out a little. Her ribs no longer showed. The bruise on her rib cage had faded to a brown and green.

"Ew," she muttered, gingerly touching it.

Her phone beeped. She figured it was Light sending her a text to hurry up. Sachiko picked her phone. What she saw almost made her drop it.

Mr. Okada [7:32]: _I need to see you tomorrow. The usual place. It's important._

His abruptness worried her. He was never so straightforward to the point of rudeness. Something must be wrong. Her uncle! Was he back in Japan already?

Fear seized her with its icy fingers making her blood run cold. Her lungs froze, refusing to pull in the air she needed. Clawing at her throat, she gasped for air while her heart beat hard enough and fast enough to burst. A cold sweat formed on her entire body. Her arms and legs tingled wanting to spring into motion.

"Sachi?" Light called, tapping on the door.

"Light, what you doing in here? These are the ladies dressing rooms," she gasped. Hearing his voice had enabled her to break free from the grip of the panic attack.

"Open the door," he whispered.

"No. Get out of here," she snapped.

"Open the door. I brought you something else."

"No. Pass it over the top."

"Here," he said, flinging what looked like nothing more than a piece of material over the top of the door.

A scarf, silky soft cashmere, in a black and white hounds-tooth pattern. Good thing he had the money to finance such expensive tastes.

Sachiko pulled the light gray tank top over her head. The knee length cardigan sweater knitted in a mixture of black, gray, and white wool came over that. A pair of white denim skin tight jeans completed the outfit. Then she remembered the scarf. She twisted the singular, continuous piece of material and dropped it over her neck. She fluffed and fussed trying to arrange the scarf before finally giving up.

"Come out and let me see," Light said, his voice further away than right outside the door.

Sachiko groaned then walked out, leaving her feet bare. She strutted to the end of the hallway toward him in an exaggerated manner purposely doing a really bad impression of a model strolling down a catwalk.

The smile on his face was priceless and made her heart skip a beat. He rarely smiled, but when he did it made her feel like she had been blessed by a god.

"How does it look?" she asked, tiptoeing in a ballerina turn.

"Nice." Light nodded approvingly. "One more thing."

Light took hold of the scarf, carefully positioning the material. His fingers followed the outer edge of the material, gliding downward until his hands came dangerously close to grazing her breasts.

"Now, it's perfect," he murmured, his hands sliding up to her shoulders. "You're perfect. For me."

Sachiko returned his intense gaze. His eyes were such a lovely shade of brown. Like chocolate. Warm. Inviting. Her lips tingled, desiring a kiss. Now was not the time and here was not the place.

"Go get changed."

~~~\\\/~~~

 _My poor, sweet darling,_ Light thought, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Her eyes had begged for a kiss on the lips, but it would have to wait.

Sachiko really was a sweet and innocent little lamb. He almost felt bad that one of these days their relationship would not end well for her no matter how that end came. Drastic times call for drastic measures and when that time came, he would sacrifice her to protect himself. That was her purpose in his life after all: to be his sacrificial lamb. Every god requires a sacrifice.

Light stood at the cash stand while the salesclerk rang up the clothes. He looked around aimlessly to avoid her come hither glances as she attempted to catch his eye. Before she could start up a conversation, he wandered over to the nearby jewelry counter.

Light's eyes scanned the rings. He decided a ring would be unfitting, possibly giving her the wrong idea. A necklace would be good though. He wanted to give her a piece of jewelry to convey deep feelings, a promise of a future but not marriage. Then he saw it: a square cut diamond set in gold attached to a thin gold chain.

"Did you find something you like, sir?" the clerk asked from behind him.

Light resisted the urge to groan and roll his eyes when the woman gave him a wide, toothy grin and a leering gaze. "This necklace, please."

"Sure thing."

Light crossed back over to the register when she came to get the necklace. Pulling his wallet from his back pocket, he prepared to pay for everything.

"Would you like that gift wrapped?"

"No, thank you."

 _Just hurry up and get it in the damn bag you twit,_ he thought, holding the smile steady on his face.

He did not want Sachiko to show up in the middle of the transaction to ruin the surprise or to prevent him from paying. She was stubborn, proud, and sometimes irritating in her independence. Although he could understand why she would be reluctant in allowing someone to take care of her. After what her uncle did to her, she had learned that sometimes people demand payment for good deeds done. Sometimes those prices were too high to pay.

"Taking up another link in the chains that bind you two together, I see," Ryuk chuckled in his ear.

Light pressed his lips together to maintain his smile until it looked more like a grimace of pain. He had told that damned irritating shinigami not to talk to him when around other people. As usual, the bastard did not listen.

"Light, I can dip into my savings and - " She ceased speaking, stopping short on her approach to the cash register when the salesclerk handed him the receipt.

"All taken care of. Let's go. I'm starving," he said, picking up the large shopping bags, three in each hand.

"You shouldn't have," she murmured, impending tears making her voice quaver. "You really shouldn't have."

Light could not be sure if she was embarrassed or angry or both.

"Look, when I called you my girlfriend it wasn't just to cover our butts." Lie number one. "I really do care about you." Not really a lie, but pretty close. On a certain level, he genuinely cared for her. "I want to be with you for a long time." A subjective lie depending on your definition of a long time. "Now, don't ruin this evening of spoiling you for me."

"O-okay," she stuttered, tucking her wallet back into her purse. "Th-thank y-you."

She stutters when flustered. One more of the many little things about her he has committed to memory. Light sighed. Perhaps he was allowing himself to get too close, to feel too much.

"What's the matter, Light? Having second thoughts?" Ryuk provoked him. "She's a nice girl. Fragile. Delicate. Easily broken. You'll crush her spirit in the end. Are you sure you want to do that to her?"

 _What in the hell are you doing, shinigami? Shut up and go away already!,_ he wanted to yell at him.

"Well, I gotta go. I'm sure I can find something more interesting to do than this." Long wings covered in tattered feathers sprouted from Ryuk's back. Although the wings appeared half molted and incapable of flight, they lifted the shinigami into the air and carried him off to cause trouble somewhere else.

People crowded the sidewalk, mostly couples at this time of night, each duo off to some destination for a date. Light and Sachiko walked in silence amid the humming throng. She understood the gift of silence and did not have a problem allowing long stretches of wordless interludes to unravel between them.

"What do you want to eat? Ramen?" he ventured, pulling out his phone. He could order it now, and it would arrive at her apartment soon after they did.

"Mmmm, not tonight. I was thinking something more comforting but really bad for me. Pizza?"

"Feeling adventurous are we? Pizza it is then."

He dialed the number to their favorite pizza joint that was only five minutes away from her apartment. During their study sessions, they always ordered out and had gathered quite an extensive list of favorite foods and restaurants. After ordering, he hailed a cab. He wanted to get to her place to avoid missing the delivery man.

Light switched all of the bags to one hand when the car pulled up to the curb. He opened the door for her then took her hand to assist her with getting into the back seat.

"I feel like a princess," she said, her face beaming when he slid into the seat next to her.

"Good. I'm glad." He took her hand in his, then spouted her address to the driver.

"Light, thank you. For everything. I don't know how I'll ever - "

"If you say pay me back, that will truly hurt my feelings. Just say thank you and let it be. I'm your boyfriend. I want to do these things for you."

~~~\\\/~~~

Who was he trying to convince? Himself or her? Sachiko could not be sure.

Light made an ideal boyfriend without a doubt. Handsome and charming to be sure. He always said the right things and did the right things. It was almost as if he was following a textbook. _How to Seduce and Entrap_ could be the title. He followed the unspoken, unwritten rules of dating to the letter. Sometimes there existed a disconnect between his words and actions and his emotions.

Then there were moments when she believed his feelings were sincere. His big warm hand held hers affectionately, naturally without anything being forced or faked.

A debate had been going on within her for the last few days. Her logical mind told her she should end this, before it goes on any longer, and she gets any further emotionally invested. But on an emotional level she wanted to see what happened, to know if he really cared for her. She liked him. A lot. More than she should, and she knew it.

He had asked her to meet his parents. Surely someone with cruel intentions would not go that far. Then again, she also knew from personal experience some people would do awful, nefarious things to get what they want not caring who they hurt.

"In other news," the smooth, flawlessly pitched voice of the male radio announcer cut into her thoughts. "Two more criminals have died of heart attacks in a prison in Nagoya. Four were reported in Ichinomiya Penitentiary. As the number of mysterious deaths increase, authorities remain baffled. Despite having no history of ongoing health problems, autopsies revealed no unusual circumstances in an any of these cases and solely indicate a myocardial infarction."

"That's so weird. There has to be some underlying cause. That many unrelated individuals, no previous health issues, how could they suddenly die of a heart attack?" she pondered aloud. She was thankful to have something else to think about other than the mounting questions of her emotional quandary to which she had no answers.

"Have you heard the latest from those nutty conspiracy theorists?" the cab driver chimed in. "They believe it's some guy killing them. They don't know how though. They call him Kira. They say the number of convicted criminals this guy has killed is up into the thousands. And it's not just here in Japan."

"But how can one person do this? How can it only affect some and not others? And it's world wide? What can he possibly be doing to kill so many in such widespread locations? There's no way it can be one person. That's just crazy," she rejoined.

"I agree. It's ridiculous. It has to be an organized group. I think it's just some kind of poison they're putting in the food or water. Bumping off a few of them at the time."

"Besides, if one person was somehow magically killing them, wouldn't that individual be just as bad as the criminals? He would be nothing more than a murderer himself. Ow!" she gasped when Light's hand squeezed hers like a vise.

"But these are thieves, murderers, rapists, pedophiles" he added with a hiss, staring straight into her eyes. "This person is doing the world a great service by getting rid of these degenerates. They're useless trash anyway."

"Light, what - " The crazed look in his eyes scared her into silence.

"I agree with your boyfriend there, girlie. Good riddance, I say."

"Isn't there someone you wouldn't mind seeing killed? Someone who hurt you in some unspeakable way and deserves to die?" Light asked, his eyes narrowing in anger.

She wanted to slap him. He knew damn good and well there was she someone she knew too personally who would be better off dead. She would be all the better off for it. The crazy gleam in his eyes made her insides quiver with unadulterated terror.

"All rightie, kids! Here we are at your stop," the driver announced.

"Light, you can go home if you want. It seems you're not feeling well suddenly," she said, sliding out of the cab on the other side without waiting for him to open the door.

"I'm fine," he said, grabbing her bags before she could lean back into the car to get them.

Sachiko walked fast, perhaps a little too fast, attempting to out pace him to get to her apartment while he paid the driver. She didn't care about the damn clothes. She wanted to get to her apartment and away from him. Her fingers shook while she tried to unlock the door. She dropped her keys, picked them up, then dropped them again before she could get the key in the lock.

"Here," he said, taking the keys from her. "Let me."

Sachiko wanted scream, cry, vomit, and faint all at once. Instead, she did none of those things, sucking in a deep breath to salvage her broken courage.

"Light, what the hell was that back there?" she demanded, slamming the door behind him after he walked into the apartment.

"What was what?" he asked innocently, stashing the bags in the corner of the tiny foyer. He reached inside one of them and pulled something out, but she could not see what it was before he slid it into his pocket.

"I know you're passionate about justice but honest to god Light, you scared the hell out of me," she snapped, kicking off her shoes not caring to arrange them neatly at the step. Besides, she knew he would do it anyway after he took his off. Damned anal retentive, perfectionistic bastard.

Sachiko leaned down into the refrigerator to grab bottles of water. This was one of the few times she wished she was old enough to drink.

"God," she groaned when she felt him standing behind her close enough that the heat from his body radiated into hers.

"I'm sorry," he apologized, reaching around her neck.

She immediately stiffened in the fear that trickled down her back spine like freezing water. A feather light tickling sensation raised goosebumps on her chest. Looking down she saw a small, square diamond hanging from the chain he was fastening behind her neck.

"I'm sorry for acting a little weird," he said, turning her to face him.

"A _little_ weird?" She raised a questioning eyebrow.

"Okay. A lot weird," he chuckled, laying his hands on her waist, his fingers extending over her rounded hips. "It's because of things like that I want to be a detective like my dad. I want to get rid of criminals who do horrible things to others. No animal who steals the innocence of a child and ruins their life should be allowed to walk around free while the other person is trapped in a mental prison they'll never be free from. It isn't right. I want to be the one to stop it."

"Justice isn't a one man show, Light. It takes policemen and lawyers and judges. A whole army of people. I know from personal experience the system is broken and doesn't always work but -"

"Stop, just stop okay. I don't want to talk to about that," he said, brushing a loose curl away from her eyes and smoothing it back into the rest framing her face. He placed her head between his hands so she could not look away. His thumbs tenderly stroked her cheeks while he gazed at her with his mesmerizing eyes. "There's something I need to say to you."

 _No, Light, no! Don't say what I think you're about to say,_ the voice in her head screamed making the panic inside of her rise exponentially until she was shaking. _Not_ _ **that**_ _four letter word!_

"I love you," he whispered.

"Oh, my god."

~~~\\\/~~~

Light considered her breathless words a prayer, a plea for his kiss.

When he lowered his head to kiss her, she closed her eyes. She accepted his kiss compliantly, gratefully. Her arms raised up to encircle his neck when he crushed her body to his, flattening her breasts to his chest. The pressure of his lips increased, drawing a soft moan from deep in her throat.

The tip of his tongue touched her lower lip, and her lips obediently parted, requesting more of him. Her tongue met his, giving him a tempting offer to explore her mouth.

Light tasted her tongue, stroking across it with his. She still tasted like the iced coffee she had drank before they went shopping. His finger hooked around the back belt loop of her jeans, his other hand sneaking under the edge of her sweater to press to the small of her back.

Skin against skin contact made her shiver, but she did not pull away. Her tongue pushed back against his. Light slid his hand up her back along her spine. His fingertips followed the underside of her bra luxuriating in the feel of her velvety skin.

A knock on the door startled them both making them jump away from each other as if someone had entered the room.

"I-I'll g-get th-that," he stammered, gathering his wits as quickly as possible. He had allowed his emotions and lust to carry him away, losing control of his senses. He couldn't let that happen again.

After paying for the pizza, Light joined her on the futon where she was sitting with their bottles of water and a stack of napkins. He set down the box and opened the lid allowing the steam and the delectable aroma of pepperoni and sausage escape.

"Mmmm, smells great!" she exclaimed, rubbing her hands together.

"Sachi, tell me honestly, how do you feel about me?" Light was taking another emotional gamble asking her about her feelings.

Her face paled, and she looked as if she might be sick. That wasn't the reaction he had hoped for.

"Light, there's something I need to tell you," she said, screwing off the cap from her water bottle. After taking a long draw, she continued. "I heard from Mr. Okada."

"He still contacts you?" he queried, the ugly green eyed monster rising inside of him.

"I'm supposed to meet him tomorrow to talk."

"You're going to meet him?" Jealousy, hot and oily, oozed around inside of his intestines making him feel nauseated. He put down his slice of pizza without taking a bite.

"He's been keeping tabs on my uncle. I told you Mr. Okada looks out for me. He has since the beginning of our relationship."

 _Our relationship!_ Light wanted to vomit. _What about OUR RELATIONSHIP?!,_ he wanted to scream at her.

"I think my uncle might be coming back to Japan," she confessed, taking an excessively large bite of her slice of pizza.

"What?"

"Mr. Okada only wants to take care of me."

 _But it's my job to take care of you,_ Light thought bitterly, draining the entire contents of his water bottle.

"I'm not sure what's going to happen. Light, this might be the end of us."

 _No. It can't be! You're an integral part of my plan!_

"I will most likely have to change schools. I should have done that already, but I wanted to stay. I wanted to finish the high school where I had attended for the last two years. I wanted - " She paused, raising her eyes to meet his finally. There were tears in her eyes. "I wanted to beat you. Just once." She patted her chest over her heart, a tear slipping from the corner of her eye. "I wanted to be first on the list."

"Dammit, Sachi," he murmured, allowing tears to fill his eyes.

"I never meant for any of this other stuff to happen. I never meant to - "

She stopped short of saying something. Was she going to say 'fall in love with you'? He wished she had just said it. She was more stubborn and prideful than he thought.

"I don't want to go. I don't want to leave you," she sniffled.

It was too soon. He wasn't prepared to let her go because that would mean finding someone else, grooming them, learning to trust them. He needed her to help him cover up his secret of being Kira. His hard work was going to be completely destroyed! He had planned to tell her about the notebook and introduce her to Ryuk. They were having dinner with his parents tomorrow night! He was so close to drawing her in to the point of no return.

 _Goddammit! I've let too much time pass before writing that bastard's name in the Death Note!,_ he screamed internally.

Light had strategically procrastinated on issuing Julian Howell Thornton III his death sentence for his crimes as not to bring unwanted suspicion on himself. It would have been one hell of a coincidence for her to talk about her uncle then the man wind up dead the next day. Ever since then, he had found other reasons to put off writing down his name.

"Where's he been?" he questioned her exhibiting normal curiosity.

"The United States. A business deal. I'm not sure when he's coming back exactly, but it will be any day now."

No wonder the animal has not been around to stalk her or hurt her. Dammit! He should have already written his name. Although Light was not a businessman, he knew he needed to protect his assets of which she was one. Berating himself for being so careless, he reached for her hand. Her fingertips were frigid, her hand trembling.

"I'm going to be a police detective so I can protect those that I care about," he said, squeezing her hand. "I'll do my best to protect you."

"What are you going to do?" she inquired.

He could see her whole body shaking.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of it."


	15. Chapter 15: They Go Really Bad

Light finished dinner with Sachiko before returning home to immediately begin his research. Despite the late hour, half past midnight, there was no more time to waste.

First he looked up the company website of Thornton-Sugiyama Packaging to find a recent picture of the CEO and President, Julian Howell Thornton III. He read the company 'about us' page. Although the 'tragic passing of the former President and brother-in-law, Daichi Sugiyama' was mentioned, no surviving relatives were listed except for the new company President.

After finding her father's name, Light researched what happened to her parents in the police department files when no news stories turned up any details. Soichiro Yagami had been the lead detective on the case. The case had been ruled as a homicide related to a home invasion. According to the incident report, Daichi Sugiyama had been shot dead in the hallway outside of his bedroom when he surprised the burglars. Sachiko's mother had been raped then her throat slashed.

Sachiko had been left unharmed since she was sleeping over at a friend's house that night. The brother and uncle had been visiting his family in England. How convenient.

Two suspects had been arrested and convicted. Light wrote those two names in the Death Note immediately after seeing their mugshots in the computer file. This was no accident, no mere break in gone wrong.

Julian Thornton had done this. There was no doubt in his mind now. It sickened him how with enough money and power, any crime could be perpetrated, the true criminal remaining hidden.

Light tapped his pen on the blank page of his Death Note. He had to be careful, clever, when devising this man's death. This was going to be a tricky one.

Ryuk sat in the corner watching him like some kind of crazed fan boy. He sat cross legged with a basket of apples in lap, eating one right after the other. They were the one thing that would keep the talkative shinigami quiet so Light kept a large supply on hand thanks to his neighbor's apple tree.

Time to text Sachiko. Even though he believed they had patched things up between them, she was still quite upset when he left.

Light [00:42]: _Awake?_

His attention drifted to the newscast while he waited. The female broadcaster wearing blood red lipstick glanced at the laptop computer on her desk before speaking.

"There is confusion among prison officials as the number of unexplained deaths from heart attacks continues to rise. People are demanding answers including the terrified incarcerated individuals. There are theories floating around on the internet of a mysterious warrior for justice committing these crimes. This person, or group of people, has been dubbed Kira by their supporters. Being touted as a hero of the people, seeking real justice, Kira is said to be doing the job that the police and judges cannot or will not do."

"That Kira thing again, huh?" he murmured, leaning forward with interest.

"This is what Chief Yagami had to say about the matter."

"Dad?"

The camera cut to video. Light sat up straighter when he saw his father on the screen with a dozen microphones bobbing in the air around his face while he was walking down the outside steps of the three story Hall of Justice building. The reporters shouted questions all at once until one rang out above the others.

"Chief Yagami, what do you think of this so called Kira?" a male reporter asked, nearly thrusting his microphone into the chief's mouth.

"Kira is nothing more than a ruthless killer. The name means killer after all. He's a pathetic coward who chooses to hide in the shadows, terrorizing people. He may be killing criminals now but how do we know he won't start killing innocent people next? No more questions," Soichiro Yagami proclaimed flatly, shouldering his way through the throng of squawking reporters.

Anger heated Light's blood. His fingers gripped the pen until his knuckles turned white. He grabbed his phone. 01:01 and still no reply.

Light [01:02]: _Are you okay? Please, answer._

"Hey, Ryuk, I need you to go check on Sachi for me. I know you've followed me to her apartment a few times so you know where to find her. Were you hoping to see a little action, you pervert?" Light asked, a smirk on his face. He clicked the pen to dispel his growing anxiety. It didn't help.

"Sorry, Light. That kind of thing between humans doesn't interest me. But yeah. I'll go check on her," Ryuk grumbled, setting the empty basket to the side.

"This should take a while," Light murmured to himself, turning his attention back to the news. When mugshots and names appeared, he started writing. Like he always did, he lost track of time while dispensing his special brand of justice.

"Light," Ryuk said, startling Light out of his fevered drafting. The shinigami materialized beside him, panting and somehow managing to look stunned.

"Dammit, Ryuk! How many times have I told you not to -"

"You have a problem. A BIG problem."

* * *

~\\..'../~

 ** _Two hours earlier in Sachiko's apartment..._**

Sachiko lay curled up into a tiny ball on her futon. Though exhausted, she was not asleep. Her thoughts, her fears, her confusion would not leave her alone allowing her to drift into the escape of sleep.

There was a gentle knock on her door. Light must have forgotten something. She choose to ignore it. If it was Light, she definitely did not want to talk to him.

The tapping came again. She pulled the comforter over her head, burrowing deeper into her covers. She hoped whoever it was would think she was asleep and go away. Especially if it was Light.

A rapping of knuckles, loud and insistent, echoed through the apartment. Sachiko threw back the covers, growling in aggravation. She wasn't in the mood to talk.

"Light! I told you, I'm not mad at you! Go - " She jerked open the door. It wasn't Light.

Her uncle stood there leering at her. His blond hair was smoothed back against his head almost giving him the appearance of being bald. He wore a white suit with a light blue silk tie. His arctic blue eyes that matched his tie took in every inch of her body from her head to her toes. He had the lean, hungry appearance of a starving wolf.

She suddenly became aware that all she was wearing was the pink cashmere sweater and her panties.

"Hello my darling niece. Oh, how I've missed you."

Sachiko attempted to slam the door. She leaned hard against it but there was something in the way. Looking down, she saw his foot clad in a shiny black patent leather wingtip preventing her from closing it. She reached out to grab her umbrella in the corner. Using the long metal tip at the end, she slammed it downward, actually penetrating his shoe and his foot with the sharp point.

Rather than making him withdraw, the pain that made him shriek like a banshee fueled his anger. He gave a hard shove from the other side of the door, throwing her backwards. She fell, the back of her head smacking the edge of the little step and making a sound like a watermelon striking a hard surface. Although the apartment was dark, flashes of light burst in front of her eyes like fireworks. Pain rushed through her head like electricity skipping along every sensitive nerve and frying it.

Sachiko groaned, reaching behind her head. A warm wetness coated her fingers.

 _Damn, I'm bleeding,_ she thought, easing in and out of consciousness when he came to stand over her. _I don't want to die. I don't want to die like this, not by his hands._

"You've been a very bad girl," he chastised her, leaning down to shake his finger in her face. "Not only did you try to hide from me, you've been seeing another man. Were you fucking him? Is that why it took so long for him to leave?"

Sachiko cried out when he seized her by the hair and lifted her. She whimpered when he held her up by her hair, the tips of her toes scraping the floor. A stinging pain like a thousand fire ants injecting her with their poison at once encapsulated her head. She wanted to scream, but she refused to give him the satisfaction. He liked it when she screamed.

"You're coming home with me where you belong," he ground out through his teeth.

He lowered her to her feet, but her jellied legs gave out and folded into a sitting position. His fingers were still entwined in her hair which was the only thing that kept her head from hitting the floor again.

"But before we go," he murmured, dragging her by her hair across the floor.

This time she did scream, reaching above her to claw at his fingers.

"No, please, no," she begged.

She cried out when he dropped her onto the futon. Thankfully, the pillow cushioned her head. Her brain seemed to slosh around as if it had detached from its stem.

"Please, don't do this. Just leave me alone. No, no, NO!" she shrieked, beating at his chest when he straddled her hips.

Her words sounded slurred. Her motions felt sluggish. She felt like she was punching underwater.

He literally laughed off her pitiful attempt to defend herself. Drawing back his hand, he slapped her across her left cheek, unleashing a fresh wave of agony that made her brain ricochet inside her skull. Blackness intruded upon her vision reducing it until she felt like she were looking through a peephole.

 _Don't go out. If you faint, it's all over. Don't you dare lose consciousness,_ the voice inside her addled brain coached her.

Pulling a knife from his pocket, Julian stabbed the tip of the blade into the thick neckline of the sweater. Grabbing the material to pull it taut, he jerked the knife to cut the knitted wool not caring if he cut her.

"Oh, how pretty," he cooed, staring at her body. "You've really grown."

There was a tap on the glass sliding door that stunned him momentarily. A crow pecked on the door with his beak while his wings hammered the clear barrier in his attempt to hover.

Sachiko was too befuddled to question why a crow would be out at night much less pecking at her glass sliding door. The incessant cawing of the bird became warbled, distorted. She would almost swear the crow was saying, _I'm coming, I'll save you. Hold on! HOLD ON!_

 _Oh, my god I've suffered severe brain damage. If Julian doesn't kill me, the concussion will,_ she thought.

"Tch! Stupid bird," he grumbled, turning his attention back to her.

"No!" she cried out when his hand covered her breast, squeezing until it hurt. She grabbed his wrist, squeezing.

"Ah! Dammit!" he yelled, withdrawing his hand and shaking it.

Sachiko tried to wiggle away but with his full weight sitting on top of her she could not move. She could barely stay awake.

The rat-a-tat sound grew louder sounding like a machine gun. More crows had joined the first one. Their wings struck the glass creating a noise like hammering fists.

"What the hell are those crazy birds doing?" Julian wondered aloud.

He stood up from the half conscious Sachiko. As he approached the glass sliding door, the glass cracked. This sent the birds into a frenzy enticing them to peck harder and faster. The glass split into a starburst pattern making a crunching noise until it finally shattered, spraying Julian with diamond like shards.

"Fucking hell," he bellowed, covering his face to protect it from the razor sharp projectiles.

The birds flew into the little apartment in a swarm, squawking so shrilly it sounded like the scream of an alarm. They swirled around the man like a black tornado of feathers, pecking at soft, exposed parts with sharp black beaks, tearing clothes and skin with their talons. He hollered and thrashed to no avail. The birds repeatedly attacked, pushing him backwards toward the broken door. Long, knife like pieces of glass that had remained in the metal frame stabbed his wildly waving arms. They seemed to be herding him out onto the balcony on purpose.

Suddenly the birds stopped, flying away into the night to leave the man hanging onto the metal railing, bleeding and panting. He flopped around, turning so he could see into the apartment. Hooking his arms around the railing, jamming one of the posts into his back, he held himself up.

Sachiko somehow got to her feet, swaying back and forth like a drunkard. She staggered toward the balcony. The glass on the floor stabbed her feet and shards embedded themselves into her tender soles. But she continued to walk toward him despite the agony, her eyes fixed on the half dead man on her balcony.

"You ungrateful little bitch," he gurgled, blood clogging his throat.

She grabbed the lapels of white jacket that had gone crimson, dyed by his own blood. She stared into his one, half open eye. The other had been ripped out by the vicious crows leaving a gaping, red-black hole in his head.

"You are a disgusting pervert who deserves to die. You killed my parents to get their money. You tried to kill me, but it was a far slower, more agonizing death," she snarled at him through clenched teeth.

Julian spit a mouthful of blood into her face. Then he laughed. He threw back his head, opened his mouth wide and laughed loudly. When he was done, he raised his head to look at her. Despite being on the verge of bleeding to death, he gave her a smug smirk as if he still was in control of her.

"I won't let you hurt me anymore," Sachiko proclaimed to the half dead wolf smiling at her.

"Oh, yeah? What are you going to do about it, sweetheart?"

Years of rage and shame surged inside of her like lava inside of a volcano ready to erupt. Sachiko recalled all of the times he had hit her, kissed her, groped her, forced her to do all sorts of perverted things she did not want to do. The years of abuse erupted into an explosion of fury so violent it gave her the strength to lift him and shove him over the balcony railing. She watched him fall. His body hit the sidewalk below sending up a spray of blood like a water balloon bursting.

"That, you sick fuck, is what I'm going to do about it."

Then she lost her battle to stay conscious, giving herself over to the encroaching darkness.


	16. Chapter 16: The Beginning of the End

Soichiro Yagami looked all around, turning in a slow circle, scratching his head. What the hell happened here? None of this made sense.

There was blood everywhere. There were several pools on the floor and on the futon. Drips and drops sprinkled the floor where the bleeding people had walked around. The crimson fluid had been spattered on the walls when flung from hands and fingers during a struggle. The only weapon found was a small pocketknife. There's no way that small blade was responsible for all of this bloodletting.

The glass sliding door had been broken inward as if something had tried to get in, instead of out. Black feathers littered the blood splattered floor like dried leaves.

Chief Yagami picked up one of the feathers, studying it carefully. Crows. Had they broken the window? Why? What were they doing flying around at night and attacking people? Bizarre.

Gingerly stepping on the shards of glass, the Chief of detectives walked out onto the balcony. More feathers and glass. He avoided touching the bloody railing even with his gloved hands, peering over the edge. He could see the white chalk outline on the sidewalk below in the weak light of the rising sun.

The man had been dead when they arrived. Every inch of visible skin had been shredded as if he had lost a fight with a wood chipper. Chunks of skin and muscle had been gouged out of his body. They were convinced the abnormal birds had done it. Before or after death they could not be sure though.

All of the policemen on the scene had thought the young lady was dead as well. The top half of her body lay inside the apartment, the lower half on the balcony. She was face up, her skin a bluish white color. A puddle of blood surrounded her head like a macabre halo. Her sweater had been cut open and revealed her body.

When an officer lay a sheet over her to cover her out of respect, wanting to preserve her propriety even in death, she inhaled air like a drowning woman breaking above the surface. Then she screamed.

The Chief had been called by one of his lead detectives to come to the scene when they made the frightening discovery the victim was alive. Every officer told the Chief her scream was simultaneously the most terrifying and heartbreaking sound they had ever heard. The paramedics had been called and taken her to the hospital before his arrival.

Soichiro Yagami continued to walk around the nonsensical crime scene trying to figure out what the hell could have occurred here. He was examining the items on the shelf. He opened the wooden box, rifling through the contents, picking up the picture.

"Oh, my god, no," he whispered to himself. He recognized every person in the picture.

This case still haunted him and occasionally he still had nightmares about it. It was his first big investigation. The investigation was rushed. Evidence had been lost or contaminated. Witnesses disappeared or refused to testify. Nothing added up and everything was wrong, but he did the best he could with what he had.

Yet it had not been enough. He had been sure of the brother-in-law's involvement but had no way to prove it. What clues and testimony they had been able to salvage pointed the police in another direction. Somehow he had the sinking feeling that two innocent men had been put in jail while the real offender went free.

Then another awful revelation struck him. Sachiko Sugiyama. Light's girlfriend. They were supposed to officially meet her tonight. They had dinner reservations at Light's favorite restaurant. This girl was important to him.

"Oh, dear god," he gasped, pulling his cell phone out of his pocket. "Aizawa!"

"Yes, sir," his lead detective stood up from where he had been swabbing the blood stain on the step near the door. They had surmised this was where the girl had fallen to receive her head injury.

"I'm leaving this to you. I need to go to the hospital to check on the girl," he said, holding the phone up to his ear as it began to ring. After Light sleepily mumbled a hello, he said as gently as possible. "Son, I need you to meet me at the hospital. Something terrible has happened. It's Sachiko."

* * *

~\\..'../~

Light burst through the doors of the hospital. He rushed to the information desk. Before he could say anything, he heard his father yell his name. Glancing around wildly, he caught sight of his father standing at the end of the hall to his right waving him forward.

"What happened?" he asked, breathing hard.

"Don't worry about that. She's alive," his father told him, putting his arm around Light's shoulders.

For hours Light had been on edge, waiting. He believed he had passed out for a few minutes of sleep before receiving the dreaded phone call to come to the hospital. He found no comfort in his father's words. Somehow he had the feeling his father had wanted to add 'for now' at the end of his sentence.

The last several hours had been sheer torture, a hell on earth. When the police found her phone, they would find a dozen or more missed calls and unanswered text messages. That's what a concerned, loving boyfriend would do if he could not contact his girlfriend. As time ticked on he had become genuinely worried.

After Ryuk had told him that Julian Thornton was at her apartment, Light had called the police. He called in a complaint of a domestic dispute, pretending to be an outraged neighbor, then gave her address before hanging up. Obviously, they had not made it in time to prevent something truly bad from happening.

Once his little mission had been completed, Ryuk had chosen this of all times to leave him alone and had not returned. Therefore, he was of no use to find out what was going on.

When Light had heard his father's work phone ring, he nearly panicked. It had taken every ounce of control inside of him not to rush out after his father and insist on going with him. It would be far too suspicious for him to know about an incident at his girlfriend's apartment when he was supposed to be sleeping.

Then his father called him. When the phone rang, he couldn't breathe. He couldn't think or move. _Something terrible has happened._ His father's words had replayed in his head a thousand times on his way to the hospital.

"Light, be prepared. It looks worse than it really is though," he warned him when they stood outside of her hospital room.

Light inhaled a deep breath. He twisted the doorknob and opened the door.

A body lay in the bed, nothing but the head wrapped in bandages visible under the stark white covers that appeared to glow in the overly bright florescent lights. Tubes ran from plastic bags of fluid hanging on poles and wires came from beeping machines disappearing under the blankets. The person looked fake - or dead.

No hair was visible because of the bandages. There were no springy brown curls in sight. A dark purple, almost black bruise covered her left cheek. The rest of her face was so pale even her freckles had paled. The oxygen mask pressed into her swollen face further distorting her appearance.

"That's not her," he gasped, refusing to recognize her. "That's not her," he repeated, staggering backwards. He shook his head as if unable to comprehend what he was seeing. "That's not her! Dad, this joke isn't funny. I want to go home."

"Light, calm down," his father urged him, grabbing him by the arms to lead him into the room. "She needs you now more than ever. Hold yourself together."

Light pulled back the blanket to find her hand. He picked up her limp white hand, holding it between his. It was warm. At least she felt alive. As if to prove her identity to himself, he pulled back the cover over her chest. There lay the solitary square diamond on top of her light blue hospital gown.

Tears burned his eyes. This hurt. His heart ached so much it throbbed with discomfort like that of a pulsing toothache. He had not expected to feel so much. He wasn't supposed to feel anything at all actually. However, experiencing the right amount of emotional agony made it easier for him to put on a more convincing show.

 _I'm sorry. So sorry,_ he apologized to her without speaking the words aloud. _I failed you. I couldn't save you, so you had to save herself._

"Dad, do you have any idea what happened?" Light queried, reaching out to touch her unmarred cheek.

"Light, your girlfriend was attacked in her apartment tonight," he informed him somberly. "Her uncle is the man who attacked her."

 _I know, I know, get on with it!,_ he screamed impatiently in his head.

"Is he in jail?" Light inquired when his father did not continue.

"No. He's dead."

"What?" Once again he had been shocked into a state of mute confusion. "She killed him?"

"Accidental death, of course. Self-defense. The case is pretty cut and dried. I wouldn't worry too much about the legal aspect of this. The big worry is her health."

 _She killed him._ The words played on repeat. He was about to go crazy from the phrase repeating itself in his head.

"Are you going to write her name in the Death Note, Light?" Ryuk taunted him. "She's a murderer after all."

 _Now that asshole shows up._ Light couldn't help but wonder if Ryuk had gone back to the apartment to watch the drama unfold when he disappeared after dropping the verbal bomb of her uncle being in the apartment. That kind of tragedy would be something the damn bored shinigami would find interesting.

Light lowered his aching head into his hand. Convulsively swallowing, he held back the bile that rose again and again in his throat.

 _No. She's not a murderer. It was self-defense. She couldn't let him hurt her anymore. She was only protecting herself. She's not a murderer. She's not._ Tears stung his eyes, but he blinked them away.

"Chief Yagami?" a man asked from the door.

"Yes. Who are you?" Soichiro questioned him.

"My name is Itachi Okada," he introduced himself, entering the room.

Light's head whipped around to glare at the man. _What the hell is he doing here?_

A feeling, hot and prickly, surrounded Light like a scratchy wool blanket. He glared suspiciously at the man when he came toward the bed to stand on the other side. When Mr. Okada touched her face, anger and jealousy flared inside of him like a fire after gasoline has been poured on it.

The teacher looked exactly the same as he had a year and a half ago. Tall and slim, effeminately handsome. He was wearing a form fitting business suit that he should not have been able to afford on a teacher's salary. His lengthy black hair flowed down his back nearly to his waist and was secured with a gray blue piece of ribbon the same color as his suit. While his black crow like eyes studied Sachiko, they became glossy with tears making them look like marbles set in his narrow face comprised of birdlike features softened by rounded edges.

"I know your name, but who are you?" Chief Yagami pressed the man.

"I'm her guardian," he answered flatly.

Light watched his every move when he pulled back the cover to reach her other hand.

"Her guardian?" Light inquired, distrustful of him.

"I have contacted a lawyer. If you will give me your card, Chief Yagami, I'll be happy to pass it along to him should you have any questions," he said without acknowledging Light.

"I assume you know my son," Chief Yagami announced as if he could feel the tension mounting in the room.

"Oh, yes, Light," Mr. Okada greeted him finally, extending his free hand toward him.

Out of sheer social pretense, Light stood to his feet to shake the man's hand. He wanted to snatch the man's arm off his body and beat him with it.

Light forced a smile onto his face. "I would say it's nice to see you again, Mr. Okada, but considering the circumstances, I can't."

"That is true. Still top student?"

"Yes. She's still right behind me in rankings. Her test scores have been even with mine once or twice." He paused for a few seconds before adding. "She's my girlfriend."

"Oh?" A thin black eyebrow arched all the way up to Mr. Okada's hairline. "I had no idea. Well, congratulations." The man appeared thoughtful for a minute then asked, "I can't help but wonder, why couldn't you protect her?"

"Me? Where was I?" Light shot back allowing his offence and fury to show not only in his voice but on his face. The man had gone too far. "Where the hell were you, guardian? Why weren't you guarding her? Why couldn't you protect her?"

Light feared the top of his head might blow off due to the pain and pressure building up inside of it. He seethed with anger, glaring at Mr. Okada. His name might wind up somewhere on the next page of the Death Note.

"Calm down, Light. I know what you're thinking. You better not do it. There are important things about that man you don't know," Ryuk warned him, standing in the room but invisible to everyone else.

Light noticed that Mr. Okada's eyes looked beyond him as if staring at the shinigami behind him. _WHAT THE FUCK?_ Before he could be sure the man was actually seeing Ryuk, those black eyes came back to stare into his with a disconcerting directness as if looking through him into his soul.

"I've done my best to protect her. You have no idea the things I've done to keep her safe. As you well know, you can't be there all the time no matter how much you want to be."

The air had become stifling, thick with hostility, rubbing everyone's nerves raw.

"This cannot be good for Sachi. You should leave," Light said in a threatening tone.

Chief Yagami cleared his throat to remind the two men he was also in the room. "Yes, well, Mr. Okada, there are a few questions I need to ask you and some paperwork that needs to be completed. I need you to come down to the station with me."

"Now?"

"Yes, now is a great time."

"Of course, Chief," Mr. Okada returned politely, his voice strained from holding his temper. He pressed a kiss to Sachiko's forehead.

Light almost came unhinged but sat back down in his chair instead of leaping across the bed or screaming obscenities. He needed to remain calm, stay in control. Maybe letting her go would be better for him because around her he somehow lost the ability to restrain himself. There was too much on the line for him to not be able to contain his emotions.

~~~\\\/~~~

Sachiko woke up disoriented and afraid. A narrow white light above her blinded her but all around the light was darkness.

"Where am I?" she croaked, her throat so dry and scratchy it felt like she had swallowed sand.

"Here. Drink this," a familiar voice spoke from the darkness.

Something touched her lower lip, and she recognized it as a straw. She sucked in the cool water quenching her thirst and soothing her parched throat.

"Thank you. Where am I?" she repeated, feeling a hand clasping hers.

"You're in the hospital," Light answered. "Do you remember why?"

"Yeah, uhm..." Her voice shook with unshed tears. Her head hurt too much for her to cry. "I was, I was attacked by, uh, my uncle."

"You don't have to go on if you don't want to," Light told her, squeezing her hand for reassurance. "You'll have to give a statement to the police later anyway."

"I can't recall much. I remember Uncle Julian came to my apartment. He forced his way in and I fell, hitting my head." She groaned when she became aware of the steady thrumming in her head. There was a roaring sound like a wave constantly rushing to the shore but never breaking.

"I'm glad you don't have complete amnesia. That's a good sign. Are you in a lot of pain?"

"Yeah, but I suppose that's to be expected."

"I'm so sorry I wasn't there to stop him," Light said, his voice quivering. "I couldn't protect you. I broke my promise. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Light began to cry, dropping his head onto the mattress beside her.

"Mmmm," she moaned. Her head felt swollen and heavy. "Light, don't do that. He would have gotten to me eventually. It was just a matter of time no matter how you look at it."

Sachiko slid her fingers through his hair, stroking his head. His hair was so soft like silk under her fingers.

"Light, if you love me, walk away," she said, feeling his head raise under hand.

"What?" he asked as if he had not heard her.

"Walk away," she repeated, removing her hand from his head. She swallowed to push down the tears choking her. "I want you to leave, Light. Don't come back. Don't call me. Don't try to find me after I leave."

She didn't want to do this. But if she had done other things that needed to be done in her life, she probably wouldn't be in this hospital bed now. If she had moved when Mr. Okada left, took him up on his offer to transfer to the new school where he would be working and live with him allowing him to be her legal guardian, none of this would have happened. However, being a pig headed fool, she insisted on staying. She wanted to see the nonexistent academic competition she had with Light through to the end. Then she fell in love with him. Stupid, stupid, STUPID.

Ignoring the sound of her breaking heart, the voice from deep inside remaining quiet for once, she inhaled deeply to say her next words which was perhaps the biggest lie in her life.

"I don't love you, Light Yagami. I never have, and I never will."

She had never been a liar before. But he had transformed her into a fantastic one.

* * *

This isn't the end of the story, only the first part of it. Stay tuned folks. Thank you all for your wonderful reviews and support. Your encouraging words has really inspired me to keep going with this, maintaining a momentum I didn't think I could. I'll do my best to keep it up. Thanks again!


	17. Obsession and Sentimentality

Light sat stunned, unable to move. Once the numbing shock wore off, the outrage - the humiliation - of being rejected set in. His fingers curled into fists, pressing into his thighs. She could not do this to him. He would not allow her to brush him off so easily, to toss him away like trash. He started shaking his head.

"No," he uttered in a low, rumble.

"What?" Sachiko asked, staring at him as if he had sprouted a second head on his neck.

"No," he repeated resolutely, his eyes boring into hers. "I won't walk away from you. I can't. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most."

"It's okay, Light, really." She sighed, exhausted and world weary, leaning back against her pillow. "You did me a favor. Since you weren't there, I had no choice but to save myself. He's dead. I killed him. I'm not scared anymore. For the first time in seven years, I can breathe."

Sachiko stared at the ceiling above her not looking at him. She appeared lost in her own thoughts. Light studied her face, only the right half visible to him. Although deathly pale, her right side had suffered no damage in the scuffle. Despite her traumatic incident, she looked truly relaxed, at peace with herself. She wore her new found strength well. That inner strength shown through and made her positively beautiful.

"Hey, Light," she spoke in a whisper. A tear trickled from the outer corner of her eye to be absorbed into the gauze wrapped around her head.

"What, Sachi?" he asked, sliding his fingers down her arm. He stroked her palm with his fingertips. Her fingers twitched in response to the gentle caress.

"If you were Kira..." Her voice trailed off hoarsely when more tears leaked from her eyes.

Light employed his best poker face in case she turned her head to gaze at him. He remained still, not moving a muscle. Thankfully, she kept her eyes trained on the ceiling above her.

"If you were Kira, would you kill me? Do you think I deserve to die for killing my uncle?" she questioned him.

 _She doesn't know. It's just a hypothetical question,_ he rationalized to himself.

To avoid reacting, he concentrated on her hand. Pressing his palm to hers, he turned her hand over to examine the difference in their size. Her palm fit completely inside of his. So small and dainty. The tips of her fingers barely reached the joint closest to his fingertips. Light laced his fingers between hers, curling them around her cold hand to hold it securely.

Her hands created delicate works of art in icing like the lily on the cupcakes she had made for him. They made delicious, nourishing food that she shared with him every day at school for lunch. Her hands had been so tender when touching him, making him feel things he did not know he was capable of feeling. With those same creative, loving hands, she had committed murder.

But that man had it coming. Child molester, long term abuser, rapist. He deserved the retribution he had received for his crimes against her. Julian Thornton had received a most fitting demise. Not only had he received a death sentence for his crimes, the punishment had been carried out by the victim who had suffered at his hands. Justice in its purest form.

"No. I wouldn't kill you," Light answered at last, feeling her fingers flex.

If she had not killed Julian, the demented man would have surely killed her sooner or later. She was protecting herself as well as seeking righteous vengeance.

"You did nothing wrong. Like you said, you were saving yourself. You had no choice. He would have made you a victim again...many times over. I'm sure at some point, he would have killed you." Light reached out to wipe away the next tear that fell. "You are the princess who slayed the dragon and rescued yourself from the tower he had locked you in."

"Oh, Light," she murmured, gingerly dabbing at the tears on her right cheek. "You have the most amazing way with words."

"You should understand Kira better, Sachi. He is there to save those who can't save themselves. He wants to prevent these criminals from making more victims. He's seeking vengeance for the victims already created by these sick bastards. The law system doesn't work. You know that. So do you still think Kira is a terrible person? A common murderer?" he asked, lifting her hand to his lips to kiss the back of it.

"I don't know," she sniffed, closing her eyes. "I'm not sure what to think about a lot of things right now."

"You should go to sleep," he told her, standing up to leave. "I'll be back tomorrow."

"Please, don't." She pulled her hand free from his.

Light's belly quivered. How could she still be rejecting him? He had done the right things, said the right things. She should be enamored with him again.

"Don't come back tomorrow. I need time to work through this," she said, avoiding looking at him.

"How much time?" He pulled on his jacket. His arms felt weak and slow.

"I don't know. I need to do this without you."

"But I can help you. I should be - "

"Light!" she yelled, startling them both with the strength and volume of her voice. She turned her head to glare at him, her eyes shiny with tears yet to fall. "Please do not make this about you! This happened to ME! I need time!"

Light shuddered at the sight of the horrible bruise that deformed half of her face.

"Oh, there it is," she scoffed, grinning hatefully at him. The dreadful smile in addition to the horrible bruise marring half of her face made her look absolutely monstrous. "You can't stand the sight of me, can you?" Before he could answer, she rushed on using a tone dripping with verbal poison. "Take a good look, Light. The outside matches the inside at last. Severely damaged, tragically flawed. Hideous through and through."

Her face transformed again displaying the overwhelming sadness that had overtaken her. Eyes downcast, lower lip quivering, her voice breaking under the weight of the words, she said, "I can't bear to have you look at me that way."

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Leave me alone...please," she begged with her words and her teary eyes.

Light nodded, turning on his heel to walk toward the door. With his hand on the door handle, he glanced back over his shoulder at her.

"I'll leave you alone...for now. But I won't leave you alone forever."

His words sounded distinctly like a threat. He slammed the door behind him. She could take his statement however she wished. He would not let her go so easily. Whether she knew it or not, she belonged to him.

* * *

~\\..'../~

 _The next day..._

"What the hell?" Sachiko grumbled when another bouquet arrived. A mixed arrangement of chrysanthemums, daises, carnations, and lilies this time.

"Another bouquet from your boyfriend, Miss Sugiyama," the nurse announced as if she didn't already know who they were from.

It looked as if a floral shop had moved into her room. There were vases of flowers sitting on every available surface barring the floor. Large bouquets, small bouquets, single flowers, dozens of flowers...they were everywhere. Wall to wall flowers of every type, size, and color.

"What should I do with this one?" the nurse asked, glancing around for an open space.

"Throw them away," Sachiko sighed. Light must have one hell of an allowance to be able to pay for all of these.

"Throw them away? Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm..." Her words trailed off as she watched the nurse stroke the frilly pink petals of a carnation, a wistful smile on her face.

She glanced around at the numerous bouquets brightening her room with their lovely colors and lifting her spirits with their pleasing perfumes. The flowers were too beautiful to waste. She was in a hospital for god's sake so there were plenty of people who could use a little bit of unexpected happiness in their day.

"Take them to other patients. Give them to new mothers and old people who don't have visitors. Give them to tired nurses who have worked too many double shifts this week. Give them to anyone who needs a smile. You can have that bouquet if you want it. I want these flowers to make someone happy...because it damn sure isn't me," she added under her breath.

She smiled as she watched the nurses file into her room to retrieve and leave with the bouquets. Knowing the flowers would bring a bit of cheer to someone, made her happy. For some reason, a little bit of guilt appeared like a tiny black rain cloud ready to rain on her parade. They were gifts from Light to her.

However, it seemed these gifts were just another way to manipulate and control her. Was she being selfish by giving them away to make herself happy? If there could ever be a good selfish, this would have to be it.

A surge of energy ran through her. For the first time in a long time she felt really alive. For years, she had trudged through each day like a zombie having the semblance of life but feeling cold and dead on the inside.

"Not those!" she exclaimed when a nurse picked up the green glass vase full of yellow lilies from her bedside table. She smiled apologetically at the befuddled woman. "Sorry. I would like to keep those. Thank you."

The lilies were the first bouquet to arrive. _Remember the lilies,_ had been written on the card. Of course she remembered the lilies. It had been important to her to bring those cupcakes to Light; for him to see how talented she could be and to give him a gift to show her gratitude.

 _"Mmmm cupcake."_ Light had hummed in her ear.

 _"Yes, muffin."_ She knew he had been referring to her scent from the bakery, but she had chosen to be a playful, smart-alack.

 _"What?"_ The expression on his face had been somewhere uncomfortably between confused puppy and offended asshole.

Sachiko laughed but wanted to cry at the same time. Her fingers stroked the smooth, cool petal of the lily the same color as the sun. She would always remember the lilies. Even when she no longer wanted to because the memory hurt too much.

Her fingers toyed with the solitary diamond pendant. She wanted to keep the necklace for the same reason - the sentimental value. She wanted to remember the good things, the things that had made her happy during their relationship. Despite himself, Light had brought her joy in small, unforeseen ways.

Sachiko seized one of the lilies. Her fingers enclosed the fragile flower, crushing the tender petals in the palm of her hand, destroying it completely. For some reason, she could not escape the persistent fear that he would one day be the cause of the greatest disaster of her life which was yet to come.


	18. The Truth Shall Set Her Free

The day after the parade of flowers, Light showed up at the nurses' station promptly at nine when visiting hours began. The head nurse came to her room to dutifully and politely asked Sachiko if she wanted to see him. Her answer was less polite.

"Hell no, I don't want to see him!" she yelled loud enough for him to hear in the lobby.

An hour later, a different nurse came to ask a second time. "He's still here, Miss. Will you see him now?"

"No," she replied calmly. "Will you please apologize to the nurse from earlier for me?"

"Yes, Miss." The nurse bowed and left.

Light stayed at the hospital until visiting hours ended that night at seven. Even though each request to see her had been denied, it did not deter him from returning the next day.

"He's here," the nurse she had yelled at the day before announced. The poor woman visibly prepared for the loud rebuff by closing her eyes and rolling her shoulders inward as if to protect herself.

"Oh, my god, not again," Sachiko muttered, pulling the covers over head and wishing she could disappear. "No. And go ahead and tell the nurse who will ask at ten o' clock the answer will still be no."

"Yes, ma'am."

Sachiko stayed under the blankets, relishing the solitude and silence. Sleep came to her, carrying her away into a world of dark dreams, the only way to elude the tenacious Light.

Gray. Everything around her: the sky, the grass, the leafless dead trees were all varying shades of gray. She stood in the middle of a cemetery. Marbled gray granite crosses, uniform in size and shape, stretched in precise rows and columns for miles in every direction beyond her line of vision. She started walking through the crosses seeing that names and dates of death were etched into the cross arms. These were grave markers.

A mist crept across the ground like a living creature. The cold, damp fingers of the gray fog reached toward her, wrapping around her ankles. The frigid dampness crawled up her body, pulling her forward, dragging her somewhere.

"Come see. Come see the god at work," a sinister voice whispered to her, beckoning her despite her being forced ahead by no choice of her own.

She did not feel fear or sadness. Only confusion. Possibly the tiniest drop of curiosity.

Suddenly the blinding mist retreated, revealing a man sitting with his back to her on top of one of a set of dual, rectangular marble headstones. Without saying a word, she tentatively stepped closer. The man wore a tattered cream colored shirt that hung on his emaciated shoulders like shreds of cloth. His ribs, revealed down to the bone by the missing skin and muscle, peeked through the curtain of his shirt. He was a living, rotting corpse.

Sachiko tried to speak to him but could not find her voice. Coming closer, she recognized the man as Light - old, shrunken withering away and decaying while still alive. She gasped, covering her mouth with her hands to hold in the scream.

He was scribbling feverishly in a notebook like a madman. His eyes were demented yet focused on his writing. Writing what?

His eyelids were peeled back from his eyeballs. The irises were a maroon brown color, glowing like an ember from a dying fire. The pen made a screeching, scraping noise with each stroke like fingernails down a chalkboard. Totally unaware of her presence, he kept writing.

Each time he lifted his pen, another cross erupted from the ground. The top pushed through the soil like the bloom of a flower breaking through the soil before growing, sprouting arms, rising to the height of the crosses around it. As if chiseled by an invisible stone carver, names and dates appeared.

Sachiko came around to stand in front of him, staring mutely at him. Finally, he became aware of her presence. Raising his head covered in thinning, graying hair, he fixed his large eyes full of insanity on her.

"I'm glad you're here. I've missed you terribly," he said, smiling at her. Broken and missing teeth appeared behind the chapped, peeling lips that separated into a wide grin.

"Oh, my god," she gasped, covering her heart with her hands as if to protect it from breaking.

"See him for what he really is." A voice exactly like Mr. Okada's spoke directly into her ear.

Or maybe his voice was inside of her head. When she looked around, he was not there. But this was a dream. Only a dream. Right?

"Do you know what he's doing?" the familiar voice speaking out of thin air asked.

Sachiko shook her head, once more unable to find her voice.

"He's killing people. That notebook holds the power of death. One only has to write the name of an individual in there to kill them."

"Is that all?" she croaked, her dry throat not allowing her to speak above a whisper.

"There are rules. But I won't bore you with the details," the disembodied voice of her friend said.

"Why? How?"

"Look. Just watch," he urged her.

A being appeared behind Light like a shadow gradually taking on a more easily perceived form. A figure that rather looked like a gangly scarecrow clothed in black leather and wearing a rubber Halloween mask stood there leering at her.

This dream felt terrifyingly real. Sachiko raised her hand to pinch her arm. When she felt nothing, she looked at her arm to be sure she had touched it. Then she saw a person, or what she thought was a person, standing beside her. A cloak of black feathers covered the body and the face was encased in a black leather plague doctor's mask.

"Wow...this is freaky," she murmured to herself. "An S&M nightmare of sorts. How weird."

Her shaking fingers reached out to touch the glossy black feathers, the shine on them swirling with a rainbow effect like oil on water.

"I assure you. This is not just a dream, but a glimpse into the truth," the being said in Mr. Okada's voice.

"What - "

In a burst of feathers, the creature beside her transformed into something far more unbelievable but more aesthetically pleasing to the eye. A man who looked like Mr. Okada stood there. His eyes looked like oily black pools in his head with no visible white sclera at all. His long, shiny black hair, free of its customary tie, covered most of his bare chest down to his waist.

A short, skirt like cloth wrapped around his waist. The garment reminded her of the short togas she had seen on Greek gods in paintings in her art book. The smooth skin of his thighs started out white, turning gray, and darkening to black toward his knees. There the skin became scaly and tough in texture before morphing into a pair of crow's legs, complete with talons for feet. Black feathered wings started to appear, sprouting from his shoulder blades to extend into a majestic wingspan of twelve feet total.

"I'm a servant of the crow god, Yatagarusu. I am here to help you. I will protect you. I will guide you." He took her hands into his.

Sachiko noticed how soft his hands felt against hers. They were so warm, heating her entire body through to the inside. She found it difficult to look into his eyes. The wet blackness that seemed to have no end was a bit disconcerting.

"See Light Yagami for who he really is. Remember what you've seen here."

Sachiko inhaled sharply, thrust back into the waking world in an instant. Bewildered, she blinked, staring at the white expanse of ceiling above her. This time she pinched herself, having to avoid the IV lines and plastic covered wires, which brought reality into clear focus.

"How do you feel?" Mr. Okada asked.

"Jesus!" she screamed.

The raised metal railing on the side of the bed was the only thing that kept her from falling onto the floor after she jumped away from the sound of his voice. His soft chuckle made her already racing her heart beat faster.

"I'm flattered, but no," he joked.

Sachiko stared at him. He looked like his normal self; hair tied back, this time with a white piece of ribbon, dressed in a white button down shirt rolled up to his elbows and ironed dark denim jeans. She rolled her eyes. She had never noticed that he was as prissy and picky as Light on the fashion front.

"Sachi, how long has Light been here?" he questioned her, squeezing her forearm as if to reassure her he was only asking to protect her.

"I don't know. Too long," she muttered irritably.

"He's been bothering you?"

"The first day it was flowers, lots of them. Then the next day, he was here all day during visiting hours asking if he could see me. And again today. I've asked him to leave me alone, but he won't," she explained, seeing a fleeting expression of white-hot fury flash though Okada's intense black eyes. Her eyes held his, noting with relief the white sclera present in every normal human eye.

"I'll take care this," Mr. Okada said, taking his cell phone out of the pocket of his jacket hanging on the back of the chair. He walked to the door while preparing to make the call.

"Wait! What are you going to do?"

"Yes, I'd like to speak to Chief Yagami. It's important. Regarding his son."

* * *

~~~\\\/~~~

Light arrived home at 7:45 after leaving the hospital. His father was sitting at the dining room table having an after dinner cup of coffee while his mother bustled around in the kitchen with after dinner clean up. A perfect picture of marital contentment.

"Welcome home, Light," his mother called. "Can I get you anything?"

"No. I'm fine," he returned, hanging up his jacket while taking off his shoes.

"But you haven't eaten dinner," she said, wiping her hands on a dish towel as she rounded the corner from the kitchen.

"I'm not hungry. I'm going to my room," he announced sounding every bit like the moody teenager he is.

"Light," his father called, projecting his voice in a way that made him stop in his tracks. "Come sit. We need to talk, son."

Light descended the two steps he had climbed then walked to the table to take a seat across from his father. Soichiro always wore an unsmiling, stern expression on his face so that was nothing new. But he looked irritated, maybe a bit angry.

Light sighed, folding his arms over his chest. He guessed they were due for a father/son talk especially considering recent events.

"How is Sachiko?" Soichiro asked, staring into his coffee cup as if attempting to unravel the mysteries of something in the bottom.

"Fine, I suppose. They won't allow me to see her."

"Why not, dear?" his mother inquired, refilling her husband's empty coffee cup.

"From what I was told, that is strictly by her request," his father interjected. "You didn't know?"

"I knew," Light responded truthfully.

"Then why did you keep going back?"

"Because I love her, Dad. I need to be with her. She needs me," he stated as if it were common fact.

"Son, I have to tell you something," his father announced. "I've taken myself off the case as lead investigator. I assigned it Shuichi Aizawa."

Light was shocked and disappointed. He had planned on gleaning tidbits of information about the investigation from his dad by slyly getting him to talk about it or overhearing his discussions on the phone. It would have been relatively safe for him to access his father's laptop to read case notes. All he had to do was wait until the Chief was asleep.

Since the Chief of detectives was no longer on the case, Light would have no choice but to hack into the police department's database more often. Snooping through case files, in addition to arrest records, would put him at greater risk of getting caught.

"B-but wh-why?" he stuttered, genuinely flustered. He had a new appreciation of how out of sorts Sachiko must feel when she bumbled through her words like he just did.

"I'm too close to the situation. Not only did I investigate her parents' murders, you're intimately connected to her. I don't feel like I could be as unbiased and objective as I need to be while conducting the investigation. I want this girl to get the justice she deserves. The justice I couldn't give her when her parents were murdered."

 _"If you were Kira, would you kill me? Do you think I deserve to die for killing my uncle?"_ Her words haunted him like a ghost trapped in his head. _The justice she deserves..._ If that was true, Light had failed her too because he neglected to write Julian Thornton's name in the Death Note.

"Considering the call I received from her guardian, you should stay away from her as well. For her own sake, leave her alone, son. Don't make this about you and your needs," his father said pointedly, draining the remaining coffee from his cup. "Think about her. If she said what she needs from you is to leave her alone then do so."

"But Dad - "

"I'm telling you, son, let it be!" the usually soft spoken Soichiro Yagami yelled, slamming his fist down on the table.

Light swallowed hard. His father was not prone to emotional outbursts. There was something his father was not telling him.

Had Mr. Okada threatened to sue them? To sue Light specifically, for harassment? If so, that would ruin his chances of getting into To-Oh University, putting a black mark on his record and his reputation, destroying his bright future of becoming a detective. He could not allow that to happen.

"Is it all right if I go to my room? I'm not feeling well," Light said. He had indeed become quite queasy.

"Let her go, Light. I feel sorry for that, girl, really," his father murmured as if thinking out loud. "Tragedy seems to follow her and disaster comes to those around her. For her sake, and your own, forget about her."


	19. Lily White's Bakery

_Three months later...early February_

Sachiko pushed up her glasses with the heel of her hand before they slid off the end of her nose to land on top of the cake she was decorating. Glasses had recently become a requirement for her to see clearly. The purple plastic frames holding her rectangular lenses started their slow descent down her nose for what seemed the thousandth time of the day.

Sachiko chewed her lower lip in deep concentration while putting the remaining row of outside petals on the red rose. Once it was finished, she exhaled noisily as if she had been holding her breath the whole time. She slid an icing knife between the delicate edible rose and the decorating nail to lift it. Her hand shook as she lowered it to place it on the cake covered in a flawlessly smooth layer of white buttercream.

"Sachi!" Ai squawked from the front.

Sachiko jumped, startled by the shriek. The rose fell, landing upside down on the cake.

"Dammit," she muttered.

Of course it landed upside down. Murphy's Law was alive and well, working its magic in her life. What else could go wrong today?

"Sachi?"

With Ai screaming at her, now was not the time to ask such a question. She sat down on her stool and sighed while studying the cake to assess her next move. Not only would she have to redo the rose but the icing on the cake would have to be repaired. The perfect layer of icing would no longer be perfect. Damaged. Never the same. She sighed, taking off her glasses to rub her burning eyes. No time to cry.

"Sachiko!" Ai exclaimed at an unnecessarily loud volume while walking through the swinging door from the front to the back. "Didn't you hear me calling you?"

She groaned, resisting the impulse to fling the cake at Ai's face. If she ruined the whole cake, she would have to start over from scratch. That would be ten times the work to do. But to see Ai covered in icing and cake? It might be worth it.

"Mrs. Tanaka needs to talk to you," she said, glowering at Sachiko. "It's important."

"Is something wrong? Did I do something wrong?" she asked anxiously.

"I don't think so. Mrs. Tanaka did not replace you during the two months you were gone. You've been back a month and everything has gone back to normal. I don't know what could be wrong now," she reasoned aloud.

Sachiko was grateful to her boss for her patience. Mr. Okada had told the woman the truth about the situation leading up to her hospitalization. He kept Mrs. Tanaka appraised of the progress of her recovery until she returned to work.

Thankfully, Sachiko had been able to avoid the media circus. Reporters and news agencies were too caught up in the mounting hysteria created by Kira to care about the death of millionaire, manufacturing mogul who was not even Japanese. Never before had being deemed unworthy of attention been such a positive thing.

She would have hated for Mrs. Tanaka and her bakery to become targets of curiosity seekers who would upset daily business and run off regular customers thereby devastating the future of her beloved family bakery.

Sachiko pulled off her apron streaked with a rainbow collage of icing and powdered with flour. She paused in front of the mirror on the wall beside the office to check her face for icing smears as well. She had a bad habit of wiping off excess icing with her fingers then reaching up to push back hair she no longer had. Her eyes strayed to the multi colored block pattern on the scarf wrapped around her head.

In their haste to assess the severity of her wound, the nurses had shaved her head when she was brought into the emergency room. The jagged gash where the step had split open her head from the back of one ear to the other and had required twenty stitches. She had cried when they unwrapped the bandages to reveal her bald head.

On the day she left the hospital, Mr. Okada had wrapped this scarf around her head to keep it warm and protected from the cold December wind. He had brought her a new scarf each week, but this one was her favorite. Her hair had grown out enough that it looked like little whorls around her entire head. At least it finally covered the long scar across the back of her head. She still wore a scarf because the air was awfully cold in February.

"Sachi?" Mrs. Tanaka called from inside the office.

Sachiko entered the small office to see Ai sitting in one of the two chairs across the desk from Mrs. Tanaka. She took the other seat when motioned toward it by their boss.

"Did I do something wrong?" Sachiko inquired, nervously lacing and unlacing her fingers together in her lap.

"Of course not, dear," Mrs. Tanaka chuckled, putting her at ease. "Actually, I have something good and very important to ask you. You and Ai both."

"Yes, ma'am," both women responded in unison, sitting up straighter in their chairs.

"I'm opening a new location, and I want you two to be my main girls running it. Ai will be the manager, Sachi you're the head baker. Both of you are free to run it as you please. Marketing as you want, baking as you want. Think of it as _your_ bakery," she said.

Sachiko glanced at Ai who had already turned to gape at her. Neither one of them knew what to make of this amazing offer. Happiness and fear registered over the shock on their faces.

"Wh-where?" Ai stammered, almost speechless. For once.

"Near To Oh University," she answered.

"To, To O-oh?" Sachiko stuttered.

"There's lots of money to made in coffee, tea, and baked goods near a University Campus. I suggest you both keep in mind the limited budget of a student when choosing menu items and setting prices. If anyone can handle this, you two girls can. What do you say?" Mrs. Tanaka questioned them, her gaze bouncing from one to other and back.

Sachiko raised an inquisitive eyebrow while staring at Ai. She could not form the question of 'what should we do?' but for once Ai intuitively picked up on the unspoken query. Ai shrugged. Well of all times for her to not have an opinion about something.

The offer was a dream come true. But Light would be starting classes at To Oh University in a few months. What if he came to the bakery? How would he react? How would it make her feel to see him? What if he did not recognize her? Or worse yet, what if he recognized her but ignored her because he no longer cared? She would imagine not being recognized at all would hurt less than the recognition being coupled with cold indifference.

Sachiko had loved Light. Letting him go had been her only choice to enable them both to move forward. Perhaps she should alter her appearance with more than just glasses, making herself completely unrecognizable. She could fashion a whole new beginning, a new life, for herself.

"I want to do this. Ai?" She turned her head to catch her coworker's eyes to surmise her conviction about the matter.

There was a resolute determination that matched her own in Ai's dark eyes. A smile turned up the woman's thin lips. She actually looked happy. It was almost terrifying.

"Will you help me?" Sachiko asked her.

"Yes!" she replied, vibrating with excitement in her chair.

"Great! Let's get started! I've got a building picked out. We should go see it tomorrow. I want to have the place up and running by the beginning of the next term," Mrs. Tanaka announced appearing quite satisfied with the acceptance of her offer.

"When does the new term begin?" Ai asked.

"April," Sachiko answered immediately. Both women stared at her. She laughed nervously. "I have a...friend who will be starting there next term."

"Oh, I see. Well, we have lots to do, girls. And we must do it quickly."

* * *

~\\..'../~

 _Three months later...mid May_

Light finally made it to the door of the bakery that weirdo Ryuga had been talking about nonstop. Maybe the man would shut up now. The long wait would be worth it if Ryuga does not say another word about this place. He looked back behind him to see the line stretched down the sidewalk to the corner and appeared to be getting longer.

The mouth watering scents of fresh baked bread and tempting sweets almost overwhelmed him once inside the building. As he neared the counter, the aroma of coffee mingled with the other delicious smells.

He watched the blond girl behind the glass display case dressed in jeans and a pink t-shirt emblazoned with the bakery's logo of a cupcake with a lily on top. _Lily's Bakery_ was scrawled above it in curly white letters.

 _Remember the lilies,_ he had told Sachiko. But he had chosen to forget. Until now.

Light had not thought about her since the beginning of the year when he had given up looking for her. It was as if she had been spirited away to never be seen again. Perhaps she had gone back to England.

Sachiko's case file was extremely small. Every bit of personal information, including her new address and new phone number, had been erased. Her old cell phone remained in the evidence vault along with the other physical evidence that had been bagged and tagged at the scene. The rest of the information in the file included Aizawa's narrative of his initial findings at the apartment, the evidence list, Julian Thornton's autopsy report, and the short summary of the conclusion of the case. She was absolved of any wrongdoing, the act being deemed a case of accidental manslaughter by self-defense. No charges were filed against her by the police department or a prosecutor. Case closed.

Light would have liked to know what happened to her. Maybe even talked to her to see if there was a chance of reconciling. However, he could not squander the precious resources of his time and thoughts on Sachiko any longer. He had a much more important priority. There were too many rotten people to pluck from this putrid world. Maintaining the facade of a normal life took a lot of effort as well.

Since he had started university, Light barely had time to breathe. Not only did his classes keep him busy but also trying to figure out the peculiar individual who shared the name of a famous pop idol. Hideki Ryuga. That _had_ to be an alias and not his real name.

Light remained suspicious of the guy who had become attached to him like Velcro for no apparent reason. He had even pondered the possibility this unusual character could be L, the private detective of law enforcement myth and legend who had solved otherwise unsolvable cases.

Light had sworn to find and kill the real L after falling into a trap set by the detective to determine Kira's location. The fake L had threatened him on national television. He had outright called Kira a murderer, no better than the criminals he executed. Ironically, the imposter he murdered was in fact a convict slated for execution pretending to be the reclusive detective.

The scent of sweet vanilla wafted from the case, bringing him back to the present while simultaneously sending him on a trip down memory lane. She had smelled like vanilla. _Cupcake._ _Muffin._ The memory made him smile, but it was also sad. He rubbed his chest when an actual palpable ache formed there.

He glanced at the bakery's logo etched into the glass of the food cases. A cupcake with a lily on top. Could this be her place? She wanted to own a bakery some day. But it could not be hers. No. Apparently someone had eaten one of her cupcakes and been so inspired they opened a bakery of their own. The explanation sounded right anyway.

Sachiko had been able to inspire unexpected thoughts and emotions in him. But she was gone, and gone for good - which actually worked in his favor. He had made the mistake of feeling something for her, and she had become a disastrous distraction. Like his father had told him: " _Tragedy seems to follow her and disaster comes to those around her. For her sake, and your own, forget about her."_

So that is what he had done. He was over her. This place had conjured up unwelcome memories from his recent past. He would definitely not be coming here again.

Light had a glorious future to look forward to once he graduated. Until then, there were other matters he needed to focus on clearly.

He was about to start dating the lovely woman everyone referred to as Miss To Oh. Although he really did not have time for a relationship, he needed someone to act as a shield to cover his covert actions and bring a sense of normalcy to his life. Like a magician, he would use her to misdirect the observer's attention while he indulged a bit of world changing slight of hand.

He and Kiyomi Takada would be the perfect, gorgeous couple. Both smart and good looking, top of their class. When he graduated to become a full fledged detective, and if they were still together, he might make her his wife. Mostly as a matter of convenience and logic. It made sense for him to have such a beautiful, classy wife on par with his own intelligence and ambition.

A laugh caught his attention. The sound was pleasing, almost melodic - and somewhat familiar. Light waited to hear the laugh again and glanced toward the small round table in the back corner.

A woman, a bakery employee given her pink t-shirt bearing the shop logo, sat at the table with an older gentleman who dressed like a British butler. A dark gray bowler hat along with a pair of gloves sat on the table in front of him. That shade of gray reminded him of Sachiko's eyes when she was angry. She had been angry a lot. Later in their relationship, he understood why.

His attention strayed back to the pretty woman at the table. Her brown-black hair was styled in a shaggy, chin length bob. Kiyomi Takada, his soon to be girlfriend, had short hair too. He had never viewed short hair on a woman as attractive but on this woman and Kiyomi it looked good.

She wore glasses with oval lenses set in gold wire frames. The reflection on the lenses made it impossible to discern the color of the eyes behind them. Her skin was tanned a toasty golden color. That warm shade made it look tempting to touch.

Dressed in the bakery's casual uniform of jeans and pink t-shirt, she sat with her legs crossed giving her a ladylike elegance. She smiled at the man in front of her, nodding occasionally, while writing in the note pad she held in her hand. The man must be giving her a big order considering how much she was writing.

"Sir, can I help you?" the blond behind the counter asked, interrupting his thoughts.

Light quickly scanned the case searching form something to order. He spotted a vanilla cupcake with a blood red rose on top and chose it. He would have preferred a lily, but a rose would have to do.

* * *

I forgot to thank you all for your reviews. I apologize for not responding to each of them. Things are getting kind of crazy with the advent of the holiday season. I didn't think I would have time to add new chapters, but here it is! Hope you enjoyed it.


	20. Part2Advent of the end The Bizarro Freak

I apologize in advance for the confusion this chapter might cause. Lily White is in fact Sachiko. There is a short explanation at the beginning of the chapter so keep in mind the character Lily is Sachiko. This chapter represents a major shift in the story. This should be the last of the time skips as well. Read and enjoy! Let me know what you think! Thanks everyone!

* * *

 ** _Part 2 Advent of the End_**

 _Two more months pass...late July_

"Hey, Sa - uhm, ah, Lily!" Ai called, correcting herself swiftly to use Sachiko's newly assumed name.

Ai still had trouble remembering to call her by the name in public. Sachiko had chosen Lily not because of Light but because it was her English middle name. Her mother's maiden surname, White, became her last name for her new public persona. She had chosen to become someone else. New job, new name, new life.

"What is it?" Lily asked without looking away from the almond Chantilly cake she was putting the finishing touches on.

"That bizarro freak is here again," Ai replied in a stage whisper.

"Ai! Be nice!" she chastised her coworker.

"He's asking to see you," Ai added.

"Ugh," Lily groaned, setting down the piping bag. Only half of the scalloped edging had been applied to the large round cake. Using the tip of her forefinger, she whisked away the tail, a remnant of icing left behind when the bag was pulled away. Without thinking, she brushed fingertip across her cheek to push back her hair out of long standing habit.

Lily walked out to the front to see the 'bizarro freak' Ai had been referring to. He was a regular customer who came in nearly every day. He stood on the other side of the glass display case staring hungrily, longingly at the desserts like most men stare at beautiful women.

His perpetually disheveled black hair was a bit on the longish side but looked clean and almost purposely styled in such untidy disarray. Despite his permanent case of bedhead, the black circles under his eyes were so dark they gave him the appearance of not sleeping for the last several months. She mused to herself he actually wore black eyeliner that had been smudged. His large, gleaming black eyes reminded her of Mr. Okada's: full of intelligence, seeing everything, and cutting through bone and sinew with razor sharp precision to the core of a person.

He always dressed in a baggy white t-shirt and even baggier jeans which probably only clung to his body by his sharp hip bones which could be assumed by his over all thinness. His oversized white t-shirt, although it looked the like the same one every day, was always clean as was his jeans. The only thing that appeared beaten up and dirty were the old tennis shoes he shuffled around in. The backs had been stomped down flat against the sole because he treated the shoes like a pair of slippers not bothering to slide his feet in the proper way.

Something about him made her curious as to what he was like as a person. Quiet and mysterious, he would come in, order a piece of cake and a cup of coffee in his soft, breathy voice. Then he would shuffle off to a table, eat, drink, and leave. He never interacted with fellow customers but observed everyone around him like a hawk searching for prey.

Bizarro freak? Bizarre, maybe. Freak, no, not really. Eccentric, definitely. Weird, a little.

"Can I help you?" Lily asked to garner his attention away from the summer strawberry cake.

"May I have a piece of the strawberry cake and a coffee?" he inquired, pointing to it while laying his owlish eyes on her.

"You could have given your order to Emi," she said, referring to one of the twins who had come to help out today.

"But I wanted you," he said, an almost petulant note in his voice.

His simple statement could easily be misconstrued to mean something else. A shiver ran through her from the implication. She shivered again because of the cold air hitting her in the face when she opened the case to get a slice of the cake. She would not have guessed him to be the pouty type if he did not get what he wanted. Or a pervert either for that matter.

Setting the cake on the counter by the register, she gave Ai a grateful smile when she put the hot cup of coffee down beside the plate.

"Will there be anything else, Mr. - " Lily waited for him to supply his name.

"I would like to speak to you. Privately," he added, glimpsing at Ai.

"Right this way," she said, ushering him to the corner table where she talked to customers about special orders.

The unusual man moved to her usual seat facing the counter and the door. Kicking off his shoes before sitting, he pulled himself up onto the tall, high backed bar stool hunkering down with his feet on the seat and his knees under his chin. He looked like a big bird sitting on a perch.

Although she felt increasingly uncomfortable by his odd behavior, Lily took a seat across from him. When Ai unexpectedly appeared by her side with a cup of a coffee, an obvious pretense to come over, she yelped and jumped.

"Do you need anything else, Miss Lily?" Ai inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"No. I'm fine. Could you and Emi begin clean up? We'll be closing soon," she added pointedly, giving the man a sidelong glimpse.

"Yes, of course," Ai answered, bowing and walking away.

"What is it - " Lily stopped speaking when she saw the man adding tablespoon after tablespoon of sugar to his coffee. No wonder the sugar bowls always required refilling after his visits. She cleared her throat, moving her eyes to his face. "What is it you would like to talk to me about?"

He continued to add sugar to his coffee instead of answering her question. She cleared her throat again to prompt him to say something. Then he began to stir his sugar with a little bit of coffee, clinking the spoon noisily on the edge of the ceramic cup. The annoying abuse of the dishware made her happy Ai had chosen the thick clunky mugs instead of the delicate china teacups.

Lily rolled her eyes and took a sip of her coffee. She made a humming sound of approval. The Hawaiian Kona coffee; another great decision by Ai. She would never have guessed what a tremendous success their partnership would be. Given wings, Ai had taken flight and become an amazing person not just as a manager but on a more personal, human level.

"I would like for you to come work for me," he blurted suddenly. He shoved the whole strawberry from the top of the slice of cake into his mouth.

Lily choked on her coffee due to her body's unfortunate reaction to inhale in surprise. She covered her mouth, coughing until she was sure the liquid had been ejected from her lungs.

"What? Why?" she wheezed, patting her burning chest. "How?"

"You already know the who. That's me. Do you want to know when and where as well?" he inquired in the way of a true smart ass.

"No. Not really. And actually I don't know the who. You haven't told me your name," she reminded him.

"Your sweets are incredible. I want you to be my private baker," he said, digging into the cake with his fork.

"Private baker," she scoffed. "How can you afford that? Why should I leave this place? It is mine after all."

"In a manner of speaking," he mumbled through his mouthful of cake. "This bakery is actually owned by the Tanaka family. You were sent here to be the head baker by the matriarch of the Tanaka family who is the _real_ owner."

"How do you know that?" she gasped, setting down her mug because her hand started shaking uncontrollably.

"I know a lot of things about you, Sachiko," he added. He studied her with his massive eyes that were the huge and round like an owl's. His direct, intense gaze was like that of an eagle's eyes.

"That's not my name," she retorted, her whole body quivering.

"Lily? Lily White? Is that what you're calling yourself these days?"

She raised the cup to her mouth to wet her dry throat while gathering up her scattered wits that he had blown to hell. A slight tremor remained in her hand so she set down the cup and folded her hands together in her lap.

"I'm surprised Kira didn't kill you. You're a murderer after all," he said, his voice low, somewhat threatening. His eyes held hers.

She stubbornly refused to look away, although she wanted to get up and run.

"Who are you? What do you want?" she queried, her voice steady despite the fear churning inside of her.

"Who I am isn't important," he returned, finishing off the cake.

"The hell it isn't. Tell me your name," she demanded in a low, menacing voice.

She was sick of men threatening her and taking important things away from her like her dignity and her safety. Lily concentrated on keeping her breathing slow and even. All of those yoga classes she had taken over the last six months sure were coming in handy in a way she never anticipated.

"Hideki Ryuga," he responded, using the tip of his finger to pick up the crumbs from his plate.

"Your real name," she growled.

Lily waited patiently while he emptied his coffee cup. She closely observed his every movement when he uncurled his long legs. He thrust his bare feet into the worn shoes and stood up. When he approached her, almost coming nose to nose with her, she held her breath.

"I've told you everything you need to know at this time," he murmured, his voice gentle, non-threatening. "I want you to come work for me. You will be greatly compensated for your time and inconvenience. I will give you what you have always wanted. Safety, security...a life worth living."

"How can you promise those things? Is this a proposal of marriage?" she sneered, issuing a derisive snort.

"Not at this time, but in the future - "

"Don't be ridiculous," she snapped, flattening her palms on his narrow chest to push him away from her.

Lily shoved him, but he did not move. The bag of bones hid lean, toned muscles under those too big clothes of his. He was not as muscular as Light, but apparently he possessed strength he chose to keep hidden. She assumed he was a man who preferred to keep a lot of things hidden.

Her eyes held his briefly before he leaned forward. She emitted a squeak, her strangled scream, when his warm, wet tongue licked across her cheek. Her lungs burned for air, but she could not inhale even when he moved back from her to hold her eyes captive with his mesmerizing obsidian orbs.

"Mmmm, sweet," he whispered with a salacious lopsided grin on his face. He rubbed his thumb over her lips then stuck it in his mouth.

"Oh, my god," she inhaled, finally taking the breath her body sorely needed.

"Nah, not quite. I'm just a man. But I think you have met a god of sorts in your life." He stepped away from her, remaining in his stooped over, hunch back stance.

She had taken it for granted earlier that he was standing like that to peer into the display case. Ai was right. This guy was a bizarro freak. Then again, bizarro freak did not begin to describe the perverted degenerate he was.

"Think about my offer."

 _What offer?,_ she wanted to yell at him while he shambled to the door. He had asked her to work for him then proceeded to tell her things he should not know. Was he going to blackmail her to force her to work for him? His statements had carried an ominous threat with them, an unspoken warning that he would tell someone about her true identity. But who and why?

Ai appeared beside her, holding out a warm soapy wash cloth to her. "Here. I figured you needed this. What was that all about?"

"I have no idea. Ew," she muttered, scrubbing her cheek. "And why in the hell did that freak lick my face?"

"You had icing on your cheek. You really should stop that bad habit of yours," she said before walking away.

"God dammit."

 _"I'm surprised Kira didn't kill you. You're a murderer after all."_ Those words had nearly devastated her.

 _Think about my offer, indeed!_ , she thought huffily.

He had acted as if she had options. His offer implied no choice, only compliance. He had made her an offer all right. An offer she could not refuse without running the risk of everything she had worked so hard for to be destroyed again. What was she supposed to do now?


	21. Lie to Me

Lily paused in the middle of the yard to stare at the house that had become her home. The modern architecture reminded her of a tower of presents: three white rectangular boxes stacked on top of each other, the largest on the bottom to the smallest on top. A wall of big square windows lined the front of each level. A balcony was built onto the front of the second tier adding to its length to make it as long as the first and biggest level.

When Mr. Okada first brought her to the house it had felt as cold and sterile as the hospital. He did everything possible to make her feel welcome, wanting her to accept his home as her own. Despite his best efforts, she had trouble settling in, feeling comfortable. She continued to feel like an interloper and a burden.

Eventually she grew accustomed to her new living space, gaining a sense of familiarity and forming a familial bond with him. Although the definition of family had changed, it still meant acceptance and joyful contentment. After the years of abuse from her uncle, it was exceedingly nice to experience the _right_ kind of love again.

"Why is this happening?" Lily groaned. She ambled to the house, going inside. Kicking off her athletic shoes by the door, she yelled, "I'm home!"

"Welcome home!" Mr. Okada's pleasant voice greeted her. "How was your day?"

"A bit weird," she moaned, flopping down on the couch. "Not good at all, actually."

"Why don't you go take a bath? I'll make you some of my special iced tea, and you can tell me what happened," he said without ever appearing from the kitchen.

Or at least that was where she assumed him to be. He was usually in the kitchen preparing dinner when she arrived home from her yoga or ballet class. Which class she attended depended on the day of the week. Being Tuesday, today was ballet. She had left work early to practice an extra thirty minutes. The ballet classes had improved her balance and fine motor skills tremendously. Yoga helped her improve her flexibility and reduce her stress. She wished it had been a yoga day.

Lily soaped and scrubbed and rinsed until her skin was red and raw in her attempt to wash off the bad feeling that lingered from her encounter with the strange man at the bakery. He never did tell her his real name. Since she had exfoliated off the first layer of her skin, she decided to forego boiling herself in a bath.

Instead, she dressed in short denim shorts and a red t-shirt before running downstairs barefoot. She went to the kitchen, sitting in the bar stool in front of the tall glass of strawberry sweet tea he made just for her. He spoiled her like a doting father spoils a child.

"So?" Mr. Okada questioned her, sliding a plate of potstickers in front of her. "What happened?"

"Well, I met this really strange man today. He's one of our best customers. I hate to ban him from coming in the bakery again," she started before proceeding to tell him the whole story. "He really scared me. He knew things he shouldn't know. How did he find all of that stuff out?"

"Huh, interesting," he murmured. "It sounds like this guy is some kind of private investigator. Let me do a little investigating of my own. Until then, don't worry about a thing."

Mr. Okada placed the large bowl full of pork ramen in front of her. She half-heartedly poked at her favorite dinner with her chopsticks. The dish she usually found soothing and delicious made her feel sad and diminished her ravenous appetite.

"Light came into the bakery last week," she confessed, putting down her chopsticks.

"Oh?" His usually narrow eyes widened into large, rounds of surprise. "Did he recognize you?"

"I'm not sure. He didn't say anything to me. I believe he's actively in denial of my existence," she said.

"It's for the best," Mr. Okada said, laying his hand over hers pressed flat against the counter.

"Maybe," she sighed, sliding her hand from under his.

"Do you think Light hired him?" he asked, refilling her glass from the pitcher on the counter.

"I have no idea. Besides, I'm sure he made the choice months ago to forget about me."

Mr. Okada steepled his fingers under his chin, abandoning his food as well. Apparently this conversation had made them both lose their appetites.

"I'm trying to do what's best for you. To protect you," he said, his voice sad. "Ms. Fujita explained that being with Light would only hinder your recovery. Your self esteem in particular. The psychological ramifications of his influence - "

"Are you blaming this on her?" she snapped irritably, glaring at him.

"No. I spoke to her to assuage my own guilt by getting a professional opinion. I was hoping I hadn't made a mistake by getting in the way," he admitted, staring straight ahead. "I know you loved Light...but there was something about that boy..."

"I'm not your daughter," she retorted, staring into her bowl to avoid looking at him. "I'm no one to you. I don't know why you care so much."

"It's a complicated story, Lily," he sighed sounding defeated by life itself. "I suppose, most of life is complicated. Some lives, like yours, are more complicated than others. One day I'll tell you why I care so much about you."

"Whatever," she muttered, spooning broth into her mouth. "So what about the deal the weirdo offered me?"

"I don't think you should give him an answer yet. Let me check things out first. I need to find out who he is first."

* * *

~\\..'../~

"Lily," Ai called, a note of panic in her voice.

Lily's abdominal muscles tightened with anxiety. She did not have to ask what was wrong. He was here. She had been anticipating his arrival all day but had grown more anxious with each passing hour that he did not come. Putting down the piping bag, she wiped her hands on her apron before taking it off.

Walking out to the front, Lily saw him standing there in his strange slightly crouched, hunched over stance leering at the poor innocent desserts in the display case with obvious lust in his eyes. She breathed a sigh of relief because he was not looking at her like that with those great big eyes of his.

 _All the better to see you with, my dear,_ her ever so helpful, overactive imagination supplied. She could not stop the smile from forming on her face. Only allowing half of the grin to register on her lips changed it into a suggestive expression.

Then, he was looking at her. His large black irises were locked on her face.

"Nice smile. Thinking something dirty about me?" Ryuga asked, the corner of his mouth rising into a half-smile to match hers.

"No," she snapped, feeling her face growing warm with a blush. She was thinking about him, but nothing dirty. How dare he be so crass!

"Are you sure?"

Her face grew hotter. Damn uncontrollable reactions. Getting hot and bothered, quite literally, she struggled to maintain her composure. She sighed noisily managing to sound irritated. A facade of annoyance worked to cover her embarrassment. As soon as he opened his mouth again she had no doubt she would get over her humiliation by becoming genuinely aggravated with him.

"Did you want something?" she inquired in a forced politeness reserved for irritating customers.

"Besides you?"

 _Oh, god, not again,_ she thought to herself, rolling her eyes. Okay. So he had meant his statement from the previous in that manner.

"Today I'll take the raspberry creme cake and coffee," he said, the other corner of his mouth lifting to make a complete smile.

 _Wow, he's actually kinda cute,_ Lily found herself thinking, momentarily stunned at the difference in his face when he genuinely smiled. A sharp pain snapped her back to reality after Ai jabbed her in the side with a bony elbow.

"Go sit down with him. I'll bring it over," Ai whispered, nudging her more gently this time with an elbow to her ribs.

Without a word, Lily walked to the end of the counter to the exit closest to the table. She took _her_ seat this time, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly as she watched him shuffle toward her. Her eyes held his while he kicked off his beat up shoes and perched on the chair. His long toes wrapped over the edge of the seat just like a bird's clawed feet around a wooden stick. So weird.

"Mr. Ryuga, you owe me an apology," she informed him.

"I do?" he asked, completely clueless.

Ai set a cup of coffee in front her first, then put his cake and coffee on the table in front of him. Catching her coworker's eye, she slid the cake over to Lily.

"You do, Mr. Ryuga," she said, stabbing the fork into the cake.

"Are you holding my cake hostage?" he inquired, biting his lower lip in anticipation of eating the sweet treat.

Lily smiled cruelly. He looked like a child being denied his favorite toy. He shifted in his seat when she cut off the bottom point of the triangular shaped piece of pink cake covered in white whipped cream icing. Oddly enough, it pleased her to see him squirm.

"Apology, Mr. Ryuga, now. Or," she raised the piece to her mouth.

A sound like a whine rose from his throat. His teeth pressed deeper into his lower lip.

 _Oh, this is too much fun_ , she thought with dark glee. When she had become a sadist was a mystery to her, but she was thoroughly enjoying herself at the moment. This would teach him to be so forward.

"I'm sorry you misunderstood me before," he babbled quickly when she opened her mouth.

"Try again," she commanded abruptly, putting the piece of cake into her mouth.

He yelped! He actually audibly yelped in despair like a kicked puppy.

"I'm sorry you're a bitch," he muttered.

"That's definitely not it," she replied, taking another, bigger bite.

"No!" he exclaimed, thrusting his hands out toward her in a gesture of surrender. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry I was rude before."

"Okay. Was that so difficult?" She signaled to Ai to bring another piece of cake for him.

They stayed silent until the cake was delivered, and Ai walked away.

"You know you belong to me," he proclaimed with a confidence she found unsettling.

He stabbed the fork into the middle of the wedge of cake, holding onto the plate so she could not pull it away from him. Any normal person would not make such a ludicrous statement. Yet there was nothing about him that hinted at normal.

"Excuse me?" Her eyes narrowed with anger while she glowered at him. "What are you going on about now?"

"I licked you, so you're mine," he said so matter of factly she almost believed it.

"Uh, no, I don't think so," she rejoined acidly, her indignant anger rising . "What would give you that idea?"

"The unspoken rule is if you lick something, it belongs to you," he says in return, totally convinced of the validity of his argument.

He was using the rationale of a pre-schooler to explain to her how he had staked his irrational claim on her. It made her want to laugh and cry at the same time. She continued to stare at him attempting to ascertain if he was joking, serious, or just plain crazy.

"You belong to me...right?" The man calling himself Hideki Ryuga continued eating his cake as normally as if they were not having the most idiotic and juvenile conversation ever.

"What? Who says that?"

"Everyone," he responded. He paused from eating long enough to poke out his full bottom lip in a pout. "I licked you. Therefore, you belong to me."

"Oh, my god," she breathed in frustration. She dropped her fork onto her plate with a clatter.

"I would like for you to come have dinner with me tonight," he said, starting to spoon sugar into his coffee.

Lily grabbed his coffee cup, saving him some time and herself the noise by pouring the coffee into the half full sugar bowl. She used the end of her fork to stir because her rattled nerves could simply not handle the annoying clanking of his stirring at the moment. After pouring the coffee back into his mug, she pushed it over to him.

"Here," she said. "It should be just the way you like it."

Ryuga took a sip, making a noisy sound of satisfaction. "Ahhhh," he sighed, smiling again.

This time his unexpected cuteness did not mesmerize her.

"All right, fine. I give," she muttered, cringing when he continued to drink the syrupy coffee. "Tell me where, and I'll meet you there."

"I'll send Watari by to pick you up. He will bring you to me," he told her leaving her no room for argument.

As if that would stop her from arguing. She ignored the fact he made her seem like a package being picked up for delivery.

"Watari?" she inquired, sitting up straighter.

Watari was the name of the nice older British gentleman who came into the bakery every week to place a large order. He always ordered one cake of some type, two or three dozen cookies, a dozen pastries, and several other assorted sweets. Once when she asked if held parties every day, he had told her they were for his associate who had an insatiable sweet tooth. He tried to keep up with the baking himself, but he was far too busy assisting his associate with important business so it was difficult to find the time to bake. His associate, as he referred to him, sounded like a very important individual with a high stress, high demand job.

"Oh, no," she gasped. "It can't be."

His associate. Lily stared at the man in front of her. He did not look important and definitely not professional. He looked like an otaku who barely saw the light of day because he was too busy playing on his computer. Maybe he was some sort of hacker or genius who assisted big companies finding corporate spies or maybe he helped the police with big cases. The latter would explain how he knew so much about her. Whatever he was, she could not figure it out. Or believe it.

"I'm sure you already know where I live so I don't need to give you my address. Am I correct?" she asked in a flat tone.

"You are indeed, Miss White. You are an intelligent woman. I had faith you would figure things out eventually," he said, finishing off his cake.

"What time do I need to be ready?"

"Eight." His big eyes watched her over the top of his cup while he drank as if he expected something more from her.

Lily started to think, trying to piece the puzzle together. She had found it odd that Light would suddenly come into this place when he did not like sweets all that much. He cherished his looks and his physique so dearly. He had always eaten the sweet baked goods she had brought him on occasion but would add an extra thirty minutes of exercise to his routine that day.

In addition to the weird timing of Light's unexpected visit, a few days later this guy, who had been coming into the bakery almost every day for months but not speaking to anyone, actively starts pursuing her.

 _If you were Kira..._ she had asked Light. She inhaled sharply recalling his lack of reaction, his obvious need to restrain and control himself.

 _It can't be. He can't be Kira. No..._ But that would explain Mr. Okada's behavior to take it upon himself to go as far as to talk to Light's father, to threaten his job, in order to end hers and Light's relationship. That explanation actually made more sense than being with Light would hinder her psychological recovery.

Her relationship with Light could indeed be hazardous to her health. Suddenly Ryuga's off the cuff and downright hateful statement made sense. _"I'm surprised Kira didn't kill you. You're a murderer after all,"_ he had bluntly told her.

"Oh, god," she gasped. swallowing hard to push back the bile rising in her throat.

"Do you have any other questions?"

"Just one." She inhaled deeply, waiting for him to put down the mug.

He was too damn cute, like a big kid, staring at her over the rim of the cup making it even more difficult to take him seriously.

"You want me to be more than your personal baker. What you really want me for is because of my connection to Light Yagami. Isn't it?"

"I'll see you tonight," he said, getting up to leave.

"Hey," she said, grabbing the loose sleeve of his shirt.

"What is it?" he asked, looking back over his shoulder at her.

"You promised me safety and security. Can you really give me that?" she questioned him, already knowing the answer. No one, not even this man whoever he may be, could guarantee that.

"Yes," he replied resolutely.

"Despite knowing the truth, you lie to get what you want, don't you?"

"No," he lied.

Lily knew he was lying. If he was indeed a private investigator working with the police to find Kira, there was no way he could promise her safety and security. He believed Light was Kira. _No way_. But the way Light had reacted in the cab that night when she called Kira a murderer and no better than the ones he killed showed he took her statement far too personally.

Lily moved closer to Ryuga. In his stooped stance he was almost the same height as her. She leaned close to him to whisper in his ear.

"You believe Light is Kira. Don't you?"

"Yes," he replied truthfully.

Lily felt her heart beating faster, harder; so much in fact it hurt as if she was going to have a heart attack. She inhaled sharply when Ryuga's hand pressed to her chest over her heart. His long fingers strayed onto the curve of her breast. Her eyes met his, and she held her breath. His lips were close to hers, close enough that if she pursed her lips she would inadvertently kiss him.

"The truth hurts, doesn't it?" he asked, his voice holding a genuine concern she had not heard before.

"Yes," she replied, her voice low. She was on the verge of tears.

"That's why I choose to lie so much. A pretty little lie is easier to swallow than the truth any day. A lie can also lead to the truth. But you know this, don't you?"

Lily had no idea what exactly he was referring to, whether it be her past of pretending to lead a happy life with her uncle or her future where she would have to lie to survive and catch a killer. Whatever he was talking about, she agreed.

"Yes. The truth hurts like hell."


	22. Sassy McSmartypants and the Crow

Lily entered the house without saying a word. She heard voices coming from the dining room past the kitchen. All of the voices belonged to men. Who on earth could be here? She stepped around the corner into the dining room to find Mr. Okada, Mr. Watari, and Hideki Ryuga sitting at the glass topped table drinking glasses of her favorite strawberry tea.

"Oh, my god!" she yelled, completely forgetting herself when she locked eyes with Ryuga. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Lily!" Mr. Okada exclaimed. "Such language!"

"At least I didn't say fuck," she retorted.

By this time, Ryuga was giggling, Mr. Watari appeared completely unfazed, and Mr. Okada's ivory cheeks were turning crimson.

"I really like your ward, Mr. Okada. She's something else. So spirited," Ryuga chuckled, pouring another glass of tea. He raised his glass to Lily. "Would you like some?"

Lily stomped over to him, taking the glass out of his hand. She quickly drained the sweet, cold contents to wet her parched throat.

"Why the fuck are you here?" she demanded, refilling the glass and handing it to Ryuga.

"Lily!" Mr. Okada exclaimed, turning red from the tips of his ears down to his neck.

"It's quite all right, Mr. Okada," Mr. Watari assured him. "I've heard and seen too many shocking things to be offended by her words. Besides, I believe the young lady has a right to be upset by our unexpected appearance."

"Thank you, Mr. Watari. I do apologize to you though," she said, bowing to him. "You have never been anything but kind and polite to me. You two on the other hand..."

"Me? What did I do?" Mr. Okada asked, pointing to himself.

"You could have texted me to warn me. Besides, I think you've been keeping your own secrets," she accused him openly.

"It was only for your protection," he responded, looking away from her.

Lily cast a sidelong glimpse at Ryuga roosting on the edge of the white upholstered seat of the chair. He was nonchalantly sipping his tea, acting as if he had nothing to do with the situation. This unwelcome intrusion further into her life was all his fault.

"Somehow I have the feeling I'm going to be hearing that excuse a lot," she told Mr. Okada, before speaking directly to Ryuga. "Why are you here? I wasn't supposed to see you until eight tonight," she reminded him, drawing his attention away from whatever interested him outside of the window.

"I couldn't wait," he answered plainly, standing up. His bare feet sank into the plush white area rug under the table. "I thought it best to speak to your guardian first."

Lily backed away when he came to stand right in front of her. He took her hand in his. His fingertips were smooth and gentle, his palm soft and cool. The hands of someone who had never done a day of manual labor in their life other than typing away at a computer keyboard. She snatched her hand out of his. Her fingers were rough and calloused; her palms excessively dry due to lots of hand washing.

"I came to ask for his permission," he said calmly.

"His permission? For what?" she scoffed, taking a step back and moving her hands behind her back when Ryuga edged closer to her. His eyes remained on hers, that odd little half grin quirking up the side of his mouth. "I'm old enough to make my own decisions."

"Call me old-fashioned," he muttered offhandedly with a shrug.

"I'd never accuse you of being polite and well-mannered," she quipped.

This time he ignored her and bounded ahead with his agenda.

"I want you to be my live in girlfriend."

"Y-your wh-what?" she stuttered. "L-live i-in? G-girlfriend?"

"Light was right. You do stutter when you're discombobulated," he murmured, reaching out to grasp her by her upper arms when she paled to look like a ghost.

"Nice word, but what the hell - "

"You are adorable," Ryuga said, putting his arms around her. He trapped her arms by her sides so she could not slap him.

"Wait a minute!" she yelled, wiggling out of his astonishingly powerful bear hug. "Mr. Okada! You can't seriously - "

The words caught in her throat when he evaded eye contact with her. He was beyond seriously considering Ryuga's proposal. The determined set of his jaw and his stubborn silence gave her the impression he had made his decision.

"Mr. Okada, no. You can't...you can't do this," she uttered in a breathless manner.

A hot, sick heat flooded her body, making her head feel light as if it would float off into the ozone. Her knees weakened, causing her to fall forward into Ryuga's arms whether she wanted to or not.

"Lily," Mr. Okada sighed, hauling in a noisy deep breath. "I think you should go live with Ryuga. Pretend to be his girlfriend. Do what you need to do help with the Kira case."

"Why me?" she asked in a hoarse whisper.

"You know why," Ryuga whispered to her, enclosing her body with his arms more securely.

"Because you think Light is Kira," she mumbled in reply. Her tongue felt thick, clumsy. Although he still gave her the creeps, his surprisingly strong arms made her feel safe at the moment.

"You know I do. What do _you_ think?"

Lily turned her head to look at Mr. Okada. Their eyes met. He gave her a sad smile. The skin on his face looked taut, drawn tightly over his bones with stress. He looked ancient and tired as if he had been around for centuries. While she stared at him, his dark irises appeared to grow and spread until the white sclera of his eyeballs disappeared into the tar like blackness.

"Remember what I showed you. Remember the dream," he said, his voice taking on an ethereal echo.

Suddenly, Lily realized his lips were not moving. He was speaking directly into her head.

"It really wasn't a dream," she murmured, hanging limply like a rag doll in Ryuga's arms.

"What? Are you all right? Lily?" Ryuga called.

His voice sounded distorted in her ears. A metallic hum shut out all of their voices when they started talking to her, probably asking if she was all right. No. She was definitely not all right. The dizziness grew worse, her vision blurring then darkening before she fainted.

* * *

~\\..'../~

Lily sat on the balcony attached to her bedroom on the second story. She had been allowed one more night at home. How benevolent of Ryuga. One more night to say good-bye to everything she had come to love and cherish. Home. She wasn't sure what that word meant anymore.

She wiped away the fresh tear tumbling down her cheek. She had been crying for hours. At some point she assumed she would stop, but there seemed to be no end to her tears. Maybe it was because Mr. Okada continued to bring her water and bowls of his homemade beef broth. The liquid was keeping her hydrated allowing her body to replenish her tear ducts.

"Can I get you anything else?" he inquired quietly, standing at the open sliding glass door to her room.

"No. I'm okay," she sniffled, snatching a tissue from the box he had placed on the table beside her along with a new pitcher of water.

"Are you?" he asked, standing beside her with his hands stuffed into the pockets of his pants.

"Of course I'm not," she scoffed, blowing her nose loudly. "Will you tell me something before you go?"

"Anything," he replied, reaching out to run his hand over her head. He quickly withdrew his hand when she flinched away from his touch.

"Who...what," she corrected herself,"are you?"

Mr. Okada took off his jacket, laying it over the back of the empty chair on the other side of him. He slowly unbuttoned his shirt, removing it too.

"I want you to see something. So you'll believe me," he said, turning his back to her.

Lily stared at the pale pink, diagonal lines that ran from each of his shoulders to his lower back forming a V. As she studied what she believed to be scars, they split open and the black tips of feathers poked through his skin. The feathers grew into the wings they were attached to. The wings pushed out of his skin until they reached their full span which was about twenty feet from tip to tip.

"Is that your true form?" she questioned him.

He did not answer. Instead, the winged man instantly transformed into the smaller, cloaked and masked figure she had seen in the dream as well. Before she could say anything else, he morphed into a single large crow, then a flock of crows. Finally, he reverted to his human form.

"I've shape shifted so much over time, I can no longer recall which one is my true form. I am a servant of the crow god, Yatagarasu," he explained, putting his shirt back on.

Lily sat quietly feeling a disturbing tranquility she had not expected to feel. She had been prepared to scream, to panic, to basically freak out, and/or faint again. She did none of those things. Instead, a peace, like the peace she had experienced after talking to Light in the hospital that day, filled her. Apparently, she had once more resigned herself to accepting without question the fabulously bizarre in her life. She leaned back in her chair, looking up at the sky.

A memory started to form in her head. She was fourteen years old. She was visiting her father's grave on the anniversary of his death. Her mother's body had been returned to England to be buried in one of the family plots in a cemetery there. Once released, her uncle's body had been flown back to England to be buried there as well. Beside her mother of all places.

Lily sighed, focusing on the twinkling white dots above her. In her mind's eye, she could see her fourteen year old self sitting in front of her father's grave, kneeling as if in prayer, tears pouring down her face like a waterfall. Her uncle had touched her the night before, threatened her that she would always be his, and he would never let her go. She believed him.

A small picnic of a sandwich, a tangerine, and a thermos of tea lay spread out ready to be eaten. A crow came to land on the obelisk shaped headstone. The crow was wounded, a hole in his chest dribbling ruby red blood down his glossy black feathers. The young girl in her memory enticed him to come to her with a piece of her sandwich. She bundled him up in the piece of silk she used for a tablecloth under her lunch. She took him home, taking great care to hide him in her room while nursing him back to health.

"You were that crow, weren't you?" she asked because she had the feeling he was reading her thoughts.

"I was," he confirmed, squatting down in front of her. "You showed kindness to me that day despite the fact none had been shone to you by the world since your parents' deaths."

"You took pity on me?" she questioned him, unsure as to why the concept of being pitied made her feel ashamed.

"No. More than that. I admired you for having the strength and courage to do what you did. You took me home, dug that bullet out of my chest, and hid me from your uncle. You were caring, tending to me every day until I was well. Then you let me go despite having grown attached to me."

"But you continued to come back. Almost every day," she said, wiping away her tears which had slowed but not entirely stopped falling.

Lily smiled when he traced the curve of her jaw with his thumb. Back then, she had wanted to die to escape the hell her uncle was putting her through. A helpless, wounded bird appeared before she could consume her last meal and kill herself. He had given her a reason to live, a reason to care for something beyond her own existence. He had saved her as much as she had saved him.

Although she had let him go, he kept coming back to visit her. She had read that crows can imprint on human, form a bond with them almost like any other kind of domestic pet. She really had loved that dumb bird never knowing he was much more than a bird. Now she knew his biggest secret.

"I loved you because you loved me first and showed me that love every day. I asked Yatagarusu if I could become your personal guide and protector. I bonded my soul to yours," he said, clasping his hands together between his knees. "That's when I decided I had to get you away from that monster and took this form. How could I truly love you if I allowed you to stay in the clutches of that hideous monster?"

"You were the flock of crows that came into my apartment that night," she stated rather than asked.

"Yes. I'm sorry I didn't get there sooner. Not being a god myself, I'm not omniscient or omnipresent. I'm sorry I didn't..." He stopped, probably because it sounded like he was making excuses for himself. "I'm sorry."

"There's no reason to be sorry. You did what you could and in the end you did save me." She sighed, closing her burning, aching eyes. "So Light really is Kira?"

"Yes. I'm afraid so," he murmured gently as if that would soften the blow.

"Damn," she muttered, feeling another tidal wave of tears gathering behind her eyes. "So what about this man? Ryuga? Tell me what you think about him."

"That's not his real name."

"I know that."

"He's a good man but not in a conventional way. He fights for good and has a strict sense of justice."

"Like Light, before it went awry somewhere?"

"Actually, those two are a lot alike. Maybe that's why you have such an adverse reaction to Ryuga."

"No. I have an adverse reaction to Ryuga because frankly he can be quite offensive and appalling. Not only in words but actions as well."

"Don't be too hard on him. He's a little weird - "

"A little?" she interrupted indignantly, making them both laugh.

"Well, anyway, he's well meaning. Just eccentric and unsure how to act in a manner you would deem normal."

"Normal? Hah!" she scoffed. "There is no normal and that's a wildly subjective term."

"If anyone would know, you would. I'm sorry I couldn't give you life you wanted. Something like the normal we see in pictures of happy, well adjusted families."

"Sometimes, it's just not meant to be."

"My greatest fear is that this Hideki Ryuga could be the best or worst thing to ever happen to you since Light Yagami. The path with Light took an exceedingly dark turn."

"Did you just make a pun?" she laughed.

"Ah, I believe I did," Mr. Okada laughed in return. "I'm sorry. I know now isn't the time for jokes."

"I guess now is actually the perfect time for jokes," Lily sighed feeling suffocated under the heaviness of the situation. Growing serious, she asked, "Is Light beyond saving? Is there no way to bring him back?"

"I'm afraid he passed that point long ago. Probably before you left him."

Lily recalled how tightly Light had squeezed her hand that night in cab. She had felt the bones grinding together, bending, threatening to break. The crazed look in his eyes, the temporary madness that had taken hold of him terrified her.

 _"But these are thieves, murderers, rapists, pedophiles" he added with a hiss, staring straight into her eyes. "This person is doing the world a great service by getting rid of these degenerates. They're useless trash anyway."_

"Oh, Light, how did you become a monster too?" she asked aloud, the tears washing over her lower lid.

Mr. Okada knelt down in front of her, taking her into his arms to hold her under the new assault of tears and sadness.

"I'm sorry," he apologized for no apparent reason. "I didn't want things to be this way for you."

"Yeah, I know. Me either. But sometimes one can't choose their lot in life. Or change it. I'm beginning to realize that we're grossly ignorant if we think we can."

Sometimes she wondered how she could continue to stay so naive after all she had been through. Once again, Mr. Okada had opened her eyes to a whole new world, expanding her vision into a hidden world existing simultaneously with the visible one.

Then there was Hideki Ryuga - or whoever the hell he is. What fresh new level of hell awaited to be revealed to her through him?


	23. Good Bye and Hello

Lily called Mrs. Tanaka in between crying sessions to inform her she would not be coming into work the next day. Since Mrs. Tanaka did not request a reason, she decided not to give any kind of explanation. The truth of the matter would be far too difficult to explain anyway, and she really did not want to lie her. Unable to sleep, she began packing. It would not take too terribly long to pack all of her belongings. All she really had was her clothing and a few odds and ends.

Around midnight, Mr. Okada came in with hot chocolate and cookies. They did not talk. There was nothing left to say. Instead, they enjoyed their last few quiet moments together in each others presence.

When she finished her midnight snack, Lily leaned back against the headboard of her bed. She reached up to touch the square diamond pendant around her neck. After rubbing the diamond between her fingers like an expensive worry stone, she slid it back and forth along the chain. Her habit of playing with it had developed soon after Light gave it to her. She had far too many bad habits to deal with her anxiety. Apparently, she had an unbelievable amount of anxiety to deal with.

"You still wear that thing?" Mr. Okada asked her, reaching out to pull it from her fingers.

"Yeah. I don't know why. Especially now," she murmured. However, she made no move to take it off.

"Do you still love him?" He moved from the end of the bed to sit beside her. After laying his arm over her shoulders, he pulled her head down to his shoulder.

"No. I think I still love the idea of him. Maybe that's what I have been in love with the whole time," she said, leaning into him. "I'm going to miss you."

"Yeah. I'll miss you too." He kissed the top of her head. "But I'll still be there. Watching over you."

"You know that sounds really creepy and stalker-ish, don't you?" she teased, playfully punching him in the gut.

"Ugh," he groaned, feigning pain from her mock punch. "Sorry. I guess it did. I can still come to you, to help you, should things get bad. Remember that."

"Mmmm," she sighed, closing her eyes. Suddenly sleepy, she nestled her head into the curve of his neck to get more comfortable. "I remember everything you tell me."

"Yes," he chuckled, hugging her to his side. "You do remember everything I tell you."

"Thank you for being the father and guardian angel I needed. Thank you for being my family when I had none," she yawned.

"You made it easy. I love you, Lily White," he whispered as she drifted off to sleep.

"I love you too, Crow," she responded sleepily.

"I won't be here when you wake up. I can't bear to see you go."

"It's all right. That might make it easier for both of us."

* * *

~\\..'../~

Lily woke up to an empty house in the morning just as she had been warned she would. She went downstairs to make coffee. There was a pot already brewing because Mr. Okada had set it up to turn on at the time he believed she would wake up. On the stove sat a plate of omurice covered in plastic wrap with a tented note on top. She picked up the note, opening it up to read it aloud to herself.

"Think of this day not as an end of something but as a continuation of your new beginning. Good luck. Love, Itachi Okada," she finished, refolding the note.

Sadness weighed down her whole body making her feel sluggish and heavy. Every movement drained more of her energy than it should. After breakfast, she took a shower and dressed in her typical daily outfit of jeans and a t-shirt. Rather than a bakery t-shirt, she chose a plain purple t-shirt. She had just hauled the last box downstairs to the foyer when the doorbell rang.

"Good morning, Miss," Mr. Watari greeted her after she opened the door.

"Good morning to you, Mr. Watari. Where is Mr. Ryuga?" she asked.

"He is in class, Miss," he replied, extending the handle of her rolling suitcase.

"He's actually attending classes at To Oh?" She followed him out to the car after picking the box she had just put down on the floor.

"Yes, Miss," he answered, lifting the suitcase to put it in the trunk of the dark gray Rolls Royce limousine.

"Wow," Lily gasped, marveling at the beautiful and wildly expensive car. She resisted the urge to ask how Ryuga could afford it. "So where will we be going?"

"Mr. Ryuga has rented the top floor of suites at the Royal Plaza Hotel, Miss."

"You don't have to keep calling me Miss, Mr. Watari," she said, putting the box into the trunk.

"Is this everything?" he asked, retrieving her second suitcase while she picked up another box.

"Almost. I'll get the rest."

Four small, but extremely heavy, boxes remained. They contained her book collection which had grown. Once everything was stowed in the trunk, she walked through the house one last time.

Never had it occurred to her that the situation she was currently getting herself into would be a temporary one. Always in transition, her life was changing again. "Change is the only constant in life" is a quote attributed to Heraclitus, a Greek philosopher. That statement certainly held true for hers.

Lily knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, she would never come back to this house. Never in her wackiest dreams and most horrifying nightmares had she imagined her life's path would once again intersect with that of Light's. Hopefully the finality of this season of her life would not be a fatal one.

Picking up the unadorned wooden frame from the fireplace mantel, Lily studied the photograph that simultaneously brought tears to her eyes and a smile to her lips. Mrs. Tanaka had taken the picture on the opening day of Lily's Bakery. Lily and Mr. Okada posed for a picture together in front of the store. Her little family of two. He had draped his arm over her shoulders, pulling her to his side. She had smiled so big; full to bursting with pride and happiness. Life was good and getting better at that time.

Extending her arm to place the picture back into its place of prominence, she changed her mind and held it to her chest to take it with her. She was glad she had the picture of her parents because sometimes she could not recall their faces from memory. The passing of time would eventually erase Mr. Okada's face from her memory as well if she allowed it to do so.

Lily strolled slowly through each room, attempting to commit as much as possible to memory. Her fingers glided across random items considering their texture, shape, and color. She inhaled deeply to remember the scents unique to every room even though she knew she would forget.

"I'll do my best not to forget you," she promised Mr. Okada aloud despite his obvious absence while standing in his bedroom.

Lily returned downstairs to find Mr. Watari waiting patiently beside the car. She smiled when he saw her and opened the door to the backseat for her.

"Everything will be all right, Miss Lily. I assure you Mr. Ryuga is a good man," he said, patting her on the shoulder.

"I believe you, Mr. Watari." She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe him with every fiber of her being.

* * *

~\\..'../~

Once at the hotel, they were met at a back entrance by two porters dressed in red and gold uniforms that made them look like Christmas tin soldiers. After helping Lily get out of the car, they loaded her suitcases and boxes out of the truck onto a cart. One took the car to park it while the other led Lily and Mr. Watari to a private elevator.

"I feel just like a princess," she sighed, leaning against the wall of the elevator.

"Mr. Ryuga will be happy to hear that. He wanted you to feel at ease in your new living arrangements."

The feeling of being at ease would surely end with Hideki Ryuga's arrival. She appreciated how Mr. Watari referred to the hotel as living arrangements rather than home.

In the elevator, the porter inserted a key into the keyhole at the top of the brass panel lined with columns of round plastic buttons numbering one through twenty. A blank button between the door open and close buttons lit up when he turned the key. After he pressed the button, the elevator started to move upwards.

Fancy. Private suites that required a key to access the elevator button to get to them.

 _How loaded is this guy?,_ Lily wondered. She realized that not once had he specified an amount of monetary compensation. Nor had she asked for one either. The only thing that had been mentioned about money was his vague reference to being 'greatly compensated for her inconvenience.' Then she had told him he could not afford it. Hah! Was she wrong!

The reflective brass doors opened to reveal a hallway of rich, thick maroon carpet with a stripe of gold Fleur-de-lis lining the sides along the wall. The walls were a warm french vanilla color. Doors to other suites lined the hallway leading to the master suite, called the King's suite in this hotel, as noted by black letters on the shiny gold plate situated on the wall beside the double doors.

The porter slid a plastic, credit card type key into the slotted box attached to the door above the door handle then handed it to her. The little light above the handle blinked green, and there was a metallic click when the door unlocked.

"Welcome, Miss Lily," he announced, pushing open the door with a grand flourish.

Lily walked inside, amazed by what she saw. Dark walnut flooring polished to a mirror finish. A circular, sunken living room in front of her carpeted in white and a white leather couch outlining almost the entire circle with a large glass and brass round table in the middle.

Beyond the living room was a row of windows through which she could see a balcony. There was a pool and a hot tub on the balcony along with plenty of lounge chairs and tables and chairs that looked like indoor furniture but made for outside. There was even a small, square sheltered area with curtains pulled back to reveal what looked like a bed. A small outdoor wet bar sat in one corner kept cool and hidden from the sun under a portico.

There was an office and sitting room to her right. Two doors, equal distance apart on the wall beyond that, most likely led to bedrooms.

To her left was a kitchen, not a kitchenette. A complete kitchen with full sized appliances. The stove looked like one that should be in a restaurant kitchen. There was an island in the middle between the counter and the stove. All surfaces, apart from the chrome appliances, were white marble veined in a deep gray-blue color. Beyond the kitchen, in the back corner, was another door.

"Is that a bedroom?" she asked.

"It is your bedroom as a matter of fact," Watari told her with a pleasant smile.

Lily entered the room to see her suitcases and boxes stacked neatly in the corner between the closet and the door to the bathroom. Her own private bathroom! She had a queen sized bed of her own instead of a twin size barely fit for a single person. But more than one person could easily fit in this bed. She gulped considering the possibilities he might have in his dirty little mind.

The rest of the furnishings included a chest of drawers, a make up table with a three sided mirror, and a chair. Everything in her room was white. From floor to ceiling and everything in between was like gazing at a snow covered landscape.

Lily lay down on the cloud like comforter on the bed. She groaned with satisfaction virtually swimming in the pillowy softness enveloping her. All her life she had wanted one of these. Flopping over on her back, she closed her eyes to rest. Just for a few minutes.

* * *

~\\..'../~

A few minutes turned into a few hours. Since she had not slept well in addition to the physical fatigue added by stress, she slept hard and long - much longer than she had wanted to sleep. Her plan had been to rest a bit, unpack, then bake a cake and prepare dinner. She had wanted to surprise Ryuga with a warm welcome. Perhaps he would back off a bit with the comments verging on sexual harassment.

Lily moaned pitifully when she picked up her phone to check the time. 5:23. He had to be here by now. This day had not gone as planned. She chortled mirthlessly. Her whole damn life was not going according to plan.

"What's so funny?" a voice asked from the corner shrouded in shadows.

Lily yelped in surprise, sitting bolt upright. She could see the outline of a man sitting in an upright fetal position on the tufted cushion of the chair at the make up table.

"Dammit, Ryuga! How long have you been here?" she snapped venomously. She flipped on the small lamp to dispel the darkness from the room.

"Did you know that you snore?" he inquired with the blunt honesty of a child.

"I had no idea. And I really wish you didn't know either." An ache started to form behind her right eye.

Oh, no. Not a migraine. She had not had one of those in four months. Maybe that was why Mrs. Tanaka did not ask her any questions about her absence, assuming it was another one those awful headaches.

"You talk in your sleep as well," he informed her, unfolding himself to stand up. He came to the bed, sitting down beside her.

The ache grew worse, spreading across her forehead. This had to be a stress headache. It worsened when he scooted closer to her. She fell back onto her pillows, squeezing her eyes shut.

"Do you remember it?" he inquired.

"Remember what?" she asked, thoroughly confused. "Of course I wouldn't remember talking in my sleep."

"No. Your dream. You were dreaming about Light, calling out his name. Begging him to stop," he added dramatically.

The bed shifted under her body when he moved. Lily could tell he leaned closer to her face. So close in fact she could feel his breath brushing across her lips.

"What was he doing?"

She could not discern if he was being genuinely inquisitive or sincerely perverted. "I can't remember the dream."

"Hmmm," he hummed thoughtfully.

She did not care if he believed her or not. She really could not remember and had no clue she had been dreaming to begin with. Her eyes remained tightly shut. She no longer felt his presence near her so she began to relax.

"Are you hungry?" His voice sounded like he was standing at the door.

"Not really." Thankfully her empty stomach did not pipe up angrily to call her out as a liar. Her body wanted food but she had no appetite to actually want to eat the food it required.

"Well, I ordered room service. I figured today would be a bad day for you. If you get hungry later, come get something to eat," he invited her.

"Thank you." That was actually unexpectedly considerate of him. She would not have expected such kind thoughtfulness from him.

Her headache threatened to grow worse, the ache rising to a pulse allowing her to hear and feel her heartbeat reverberating through her head. Perhaps she had allowed herself to get a bit dehydrated. She had not drank enough water today.

Sitting up in preparation to get up to go to the kitchen, Lily saw a bottle of water sitting on the pristine white surface of the make up table.

 _Yeah. He might not be such a horrible person after all,_ she thought to herself, reluctantly leaving the soft comfort of the bed to retrieve the water.

After drinking the entire bottle of water, she felt a little better so she ventured into the wide open area that actually encompassed three rooms. From the kitchen she could see across to the sitting room/office area.

Ryuga sat at computer in his typical unconventional way. He poked at the keys in a two fingered typing method, using only his forefingers and stabbing straight down as if to avoid using the pad of his fingertip which would leave a fingerprint on the keys.

Lily could hear voices coming through the speakers while he listened intently, chewing absentmindedly on his thumb. He mumbled something in reply that she could not quite catch. Although she could hear all the voices, she was too far away to make out any distinct words.

Choosing not to be an eavesdropper, listening in on whatever important matter he was attending to, she decided she should take stock of the kitchen cabinets and refrigerator. Each cabinet was like opening Pandora's Box - she never knew what she would find.

Coffee and tea galore along with all of the devices and appliances used in brewing them filled one column of cabinets. This included an entire shelf dedicated to sweeteners: sugar, sugar cubes, turbinado sugar, agave syrup, honey, etc. No surprise there. Of course there were no artificial sweeteners among them. That would be a travesty and a disservice to the beverage in his eyes.

Another column of cabinets held some of the most beautiful tea cups with matching saucers she had ever seen in her life. She felt as if she were browsing the shelves of an artist's shop in some quaint corner of the world. To look like a bum, Ryuga definitely had refined tastes. Or perhaps Mr. Watari had chosen each one of these.

Glancing over her shoulder at the man talking to people on the other side of the computer screen, Lily had the feeling that he had indeed been the one to pick out these cups and saucers. Choosing each one with care, putting careful thought into each decision. He did not seem to be one to act impulsively and not take time to make the best choice possible.

Lily closed the cabinet. So why her? Why had he chosen her to be the key to get to Light? However, playing on Light's emotions did have a tendency to make him slip up and temporarily lose his mask of cold indifference allowing one to see the truth behind the carefully crafted facade of lies. She had seen behind the veil a few times.

She believed Ryuga was giving her far too much credit for being able to hold such a powerful influence over Light. However, Light had talked to Ryuga about her. She pondered if it was of his own volition, reminiscing about their relationship or if the overly inquisitive Ryuga had point blank asked him questions about their relationship. With a shrug and a sigh, she let it go. Musing about such things would only drum up more questions and hurt her feelings.

Lily opened the refrigerator to see boxes from the bakery crowding most of the shelves. There was not a single green thing and barely anything that could be construed as healthy among the sea of white boxes.

"Well, this will have to change," she murmured to herself.

"What will?" Ryuga asked, suddenly very close.

Lily cried out in surprise, whirling around to see he was casually leaning against the island in the middle of the kitchen as if he had been standing there watching her the whole time. Surely she had not been plundering through everything that long.

"You've got to stop sneaking up on me or you're going to give me a heart attack," she panted, finally remembering to breath.

Ryuga shrugged, pulling his hands out of the pockets of his jeans. "Kira's cornered the market on giving people heart attacks."

"That's not funny, asshole," she muttered irritably, glaring hotly at him as he moved toward her.

"You're right. It's not," he replied earnestly, hunching down a little further to bring the tip of his nose into alignment with hers. "That's why I need you. I need you to help me investigate Light Yagami."

"He will recognize me quickly...but you're counting on that aren't you?"

"Clever girl," he complimented her with a hint of sarcasm.

"Do you really think this will work? Do you think he cares that much about me?" she asked, leaning back to put a few inches of distance between their faces. She retreated into the open fridge until her back pressed against the shelves.

"If you or myself did not believe you would have some modicum of success in this endeavor, you would not be here right now. Acting as my girlfriend will upset him, throw him off his game, loosen that tightly knit facade of his. My plan will work."

"I don't know..." She allowed her words to trail off before uttering any further doubts.

"Oh, I do," he answered breathlessly, closing the small distance she had created between them. He put his hands on either side of the open door, trapping her within the refrigerator. "Judging by what he has told me about you, I'm sure of it. He's lying to himself saying he has let you go."

Lily was not sure if the cold chill running up her spine was from the air blowing across her back from the refrigerator or his words.

"What am I supposed to do?" she inquired, her body starting to tremble. His dark eyes held hers as if measuring her mettle.

"Do what you do best, sweet girl," he said, catching her chin between his thumb and forefinger when she tried to look away from him. "Look pretty, be sassy, and make him fall in love with you all over again. Although, honestly, I don't think he ever stopped being in love with you."

Lily's heart inexplicably leapt for joy at those words. She knew she should not be happy upon hearing that statement, but she was elated.

"How far do your privileges go as my pretend boyfriend?" she asked, gulping so forcefully it made a sound they could both hear.

"Well, my dear," he murmured, placing his hand on her neck. He lowered his head as if he were going to place a kiss under her earlobe but whispered in her, "That depends on you and the situation. I'll go as far as I have to go to make him believe you belong to me. What about you?"

How far could she push herself to help catch a killer? Her eye slid to the corner to glimpse at Ryuga. He stood ready and waiting for her answer. Whether he would kiss her or not remained a question only he could answer.

"Yes. Of course, I'll do whatever it takes. Kira must be stopped," she croaked.

"Good," he said, backing away from her immediately.

Lily moved out of the refrigerator and closed the door. "You're a great manipulator. A practiced liar. Why should I trust you?"

"Everyone has lied to you. You have told lies yourself. You're no less guilty than any other person on earth. Don't be so sanctimonious," he chastised her. "People lie for all sorts of reasons For selfish reasons, to manipulate and get what they want. Also for benign purposes to spare a person's feelings. Whatever the reason, a lie is still a lie. You can't allow yourself to see the world in only shades of black and white. That is the mistake Light has made."

Light might have started his killing with noble ideals but had gotten lost in the madness of his new found godhood along the way. He had crossed lines, blurring them, before redrawing them entirely. His moral compass was off. His ideas of right and wrong, good and evil, had shifted so gradually even he was unaware of his skewed sense of justice.

"I'm going to ask you a question. You can tell me a lie you think I want to hear or tell me the truth about the matter. I won't judge you either way. Besides, I have a pretty good idea of what the truth is on the subject," he said, thrusting his hands back into his pockets. "Did you enjoy it when you killed your uncle? Did it feel good to see him lying there on the ground, dying?"

Lily was shaking so profoundly it felt as if the floor under her feet shuddered. She held back the tears, refusing to cry, refusing to look weak in front of him. She curled her fingers into fists, squeezing until her fingernails cut into her palms. "Why are you doing this?"

"Answer me," he ordered her without raising his voice beyond it's normal low volume.

"Yes," she answered calmly. There was no reason to scream or be upset. He had requested an honest answer. There it is. "Yes. I enjoyed it. It made me happy to take his life after what he had done to me. To make him pay. He deserved that and more. My only regret is that I could not bring him back to life and kill him all over again. Maybe a dozen more times. He deserved what he got, and I was happy to give it to him."

Ryuga actually smiled at her then began slowly clapping his hands. He stopped clapping, raising a finger into the air like a teacher about to make a point during a lecture.

"According to psychology textbooks, you would be considered a psychopathic murderer after that little confession. But as you know, there are extenuating circumstances. So does Kira," he added, one side of his smile dropping to turn his expression into an eerie little grin. "But he has a soft spot for you. He took those extenuating circumstances into account and spared your life. And here you are..." He extended his arms, spreading his fingers as if showing her off like a game show hostess brings attention to a prize. "Still alive. So I know you can get to him, get beyond his walls."

"Fine. So when do we begin putting this little scheme of yours into action?"

"Tomorrow I want you to make a picnic for four and meet me at the pavilion on campus. The University is having a summer picnic social. We are allowed to bring significant others. Mine would be you, my darling."

"Aren't I the lucky girl?" She nearly sang in a syrupy sweet voice while batting her eyelashes.

"Of course you are. Here's what I want you to bring..."


	24. A Picnic Complete with Heartburn

Lily clutched the handles of the picnic basket tightly with both hands. The anxiety made her feel queasy. She reached up to play with the necklace but quickly lowered her hand. She had taken it off so she would not start fiddling with it in front of Light and allow him to recognize her too easily too soon.

Since she was not working at the bakery today where the flour and sugar dust could get into her eyes, Lily wore her brown contacts. She had contacts in several colors and in clear. Her foundation and concealer had been layered on extra thick today to hide the freckles that had not blended into her tan.

Although she had taken great care to cover up her face, she showed off her other assets by wearing short denim shorts, a white, fluttery off the shoulder bohemian top, and black espadrille wedges with ribbons that wrapped around her ankles. Despite having short hair, she had pinned it up into a little bun.

Lily had gone to the bakery extra early this morning to get the days baking completed before making their lunch and the special cupcakes Ryuga had requested. She had also made strawberry tea and lemonade to drink.

Nervous tension offset her lack of sleep. She felt like she had enough energy to run for miles and never slow down. When she saw the pavilion, she froze in her tracks. Dozens of people milled about but it was easy to pick out the flawless styled honey colored hair belonging to Light and the untamed black fluff of Ryuga.

Lily studied the woman who stood beside Light. Though not excessively tall, she had the lengthy, rangy limbs of a model. Her coal black hair was short, cropped fairly close to her head with a longer fringe of bangs over her forehead. Her blood red lipstick matched the silk tank top she was wearing paired with demure knee length black shorts. She wore sandals with a short heel making her casual outfit into something more elegant.

The sharp sting of jealousy made her insides twitch. The sobering bite of the green eyed monster made her forget how nervous she was. Raising her nose into the air, donning her pampered princess persona, she inhaled a deep breath and moved forward.

"Here goes nothing," she murmured to herself. "Or everything."

~~~\\\/~~~

Light scanned the area again searching for Ryuga's late, and probably imaginary, girlfriend. He had known the guy for a little over three months and this was the first he had heard about a girlfriend. The idea of someone being weird enough to date Ryuga was difficult for him to wrap his brain around.

He glanced at Ryuga with his crazy hair, the shadows under his eyes, and ill fitting clothes and tried to imagine what this mystery woman would look like. Absolutely nothing happened. Although he had a fairly decent creative side, not a single image formed in his mind of what Ryuga's girlfriend might look like.

"Oh, there she is," Ryuga announced, shambling off.

"Light?" Kiyomi called, hooking her arm through his. "Do you think he really has a girlfriend?"

"Maybe he hired someone to pretend to be his girlfriend," Light rejoined, only half joking.

"Don't be mean," she playfully scolded him, swatting his arm.

Light followed Ryuga as he made his way through the sea of people. Then he saw her.

"Oh, my god," he muttered in astonishment.

"What?" Kiyomi asked. She stood on her tip toes trying to see who Light was looking at. When he did not answer but continued to stare, she shook his arm and exclaimed, "What? What is it? Is she that awful?"

"No. Quite the opposite. Over there," Light said, pulling her over in front of him to point her in the right direction to look.

"Oh, my god," Kiyomi gasped. "She's so pretty."

"Yeah, she is," he agreed. "It's just shocking that someone who looks like her would be with someone who looks like..." He waved his hand helplessly, struggling to find the words.

"Him?" she suggested, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," he replied.

They watched as Ryuga took the basket from her, taking her hand in his to lead her to the pavilion. The closer she got the prettier she looked with warm caramel colored skin and a blush on her cheeks from the heat. Her eyes were almost the same color as her skin but a more golden shade of brown. Her arms and legs were beyond toned bearing the chiseled lines of muscle definition.

 _How in the hell did Ryuga get a woman like this?_

~~~\\\/~~~

 _Oh, my god, there he is!,_ her own voice screamed inside her head. _Don't panic! Don't panic! Be cool. You can do this. Stay calm. Poise. Confidence. Be a lady._

Lily glanced at the woman standing beside Light. That woman was already everything she was feigning to be. At this exact second, she was about to lose her mind and struggled to maintain her composure. Her eyes slid back over to Light.

 _OH GOD!_ He looked the same. So handsome and aloof. Still looking down on everyone from his throne up on high. She gulped hard. To think she had once attained the unattainable - he had been hers. If only circumstances had been different...but they were not and here they were. She is pretending to be a stranger he has never met, and he is still him, reveling in all of his glory with a new girlfriend. Life is strange. And cruel.

"You're all right," Ryuga said in a low voice for her ears only. "You can do this. Look pretty, be sassy. Be the wonderful you that you are."

"Ryuga," she inhaled sharply, stopping him before they reached the other couple.

"Call me Hideki. That's what my lover would do," he murmured, stroking her cheek with his fingertips.

Lily was already too frazzled to be upset by his suggestive words and touch. She turned to him, placing her hand on his chest as she looked into his eyes. "I don't think I can...I don't know if...I can't..."

Lily was too startled to slap him when he smashed his lips to hers. The intense shock numbed her as if she had been given a shot of Valium. She exhaled noisily when he lifted his lips from hers. Her eyes held his but no words came to mind - not a single insult nor a string of curse words.

"Hideki," she panted, staring at him.

"What, my dear?" He brushed his thumb across her vermilion colored cheek.

"I'm going to kill you later."

"Okay but don't do it quickly. Make it last. That's all I ask," he countered suggestively. Upon seeing his attempt at bawdy humor failed in her current state of upset, he took her by the hand to lead her forward. "Come on. You can do this. And you're going to be great."

Lily clutched his hand for dear life when they came to stand in front of the other couple.

"Light, Kiyomi, this is Lily White," Ryuga introduced her.

"Lily," Light repeated, gazing intently at her face. "You look familiar. Do I know you?"

Lily pulled out every last trick she knew to keep herself calm and remain conscious. A slow, tranquil grin spread across her face. Her tongue felt thick and clumsy.

 _I can do this. And I'll be great_ , she coached herself using Hideki's words.

"I'm a co-owner and the head baker of Lily's Bakery. If you've come in there, you've seen me. Is that it?" she asked. Her voice did not waver at all.

"That's got to be it. I love that place!" Light's girlfriend piped up excitedly. "So you're the Lily of Lily's Bakery."

"I am," she replied, extending her hand. "It's so nice to meet you."

She received a firm, self-assured handshake not one of the limp wristed, uncertain hand touches she was accustomed to getting in return from women.

"Lily, I'd like to introduce you to the rose of To Oh University, Kiyomi Takada," LIght announced to formally acquaint them.

Her stomach tied itself in knots of apprehension when his eyes met hers. The slight lift of the corner of his mouth made him look evil, vindictive - and arrogant as always. His sense of self-importance had not changed.

"It's nice to meet you too," Kiyomi returned, flashing a set of camera ready white teeth.

Lily would stake money on saying that Kiyomi was the most beautiful, most popular, most desired woman on the To Oh campus. Of course this woman was Light's girlfriend. They were a perfect match, equal in every way.

It went without saying that Kiyomi was intelligent. She was well spoken and friendly. Easy to like. Under different circumstances, Lily would like to have been friends with this woman.

Taking stock of her own attributes, she began to wonder why Light had ever been with someone like her. Self-doubt crept in threatening to crush her carefully constructed veneer of confidence. A wistful smile lifted the corners of her mouth when she recalled how Light would admonish her for thinking degrading, negative thoughts about herself.

"I'm starving. Let's eat!" Ryuga proclaimed, taking her by the hand. He led her toward a picnic spot under a cluster of thick branches that had twisted together over the decades this tree had been alive and now offered them the cool comfort of shade from the broiling summer sun.

Lily assisted him with spreading out the official red and white checkered picnic blanket, a must have for any picnic. She knelt down and started unpacking the basket. Chicken salad sandwiches and roast beef sandwiches, carrots and cucumbers cut into flower shapes held onto 'stems' of celery with toothpicks, and homemade potato chips she made herself at the bakery. Then the cupcakes. A dozen painstakingly designed cupcakes: each one a miniature picnic scene with a red and white 'tablecloth' of fondant icing and miniature food formed out of sculpting chocolate.

"Oh, these are too cute!" Kiyomi gushed, picking up one to get a closer look. "You are more than a baker. You are an artist."

"Light, wasn't your last girlfriend a baker?" Hideki inquired.

Lily wanted to slap him. He was pushing too hard. LIght would figure it out soon enough; if he had not already. She was not ready to deal with his reaction to her yet, whether it be positive or negative. She had a strong suspicion it would not be the former. Busying herself with pouring their drinks prevented her from acting on her desire to smack Hideki. Breathe. One...two...three.

"Hideki, it's rude to talk about such things in front of his present girlfriend," Lily admonished him like a patient mother. She handed Kiyomi a cup of the strawberry tea. "Kiyomi, what is your major?"

"Journalism. One day I hope to be the lead anchor on a newscast. I want to be one of those legendary broadcasters who people look forward to seeing every night on the prime time broadcast. I want to deliver the truth, the hard hitting stories, giving people the information they need to know," she said, the passion for her chosen career obvious in her words and gleaming dark eyes.

"What about you, Light?" she inquired, handing him a cup of tea.

His fingers brushed over hers when he took the small, metal cup from her. His eyes captured hers, refusing to release them. Her heart ceased beating then slammed into her rib cage like a runaway truck when it started up again.

 _Stop it, stupid. Just stop it,_ her inner voice chided her. A cool, smooth palm pressed against her thigh making her aware of how hot her skin had become. Thankful for Hideki's unexpected touch that drew her attention away from Light, she smiled at him receiving one in return. She closed her eyes when he leaned forward to press a kiss to her cheek.

"You're just as beautiful as her. In every way," he whispered.

"Criminal justice," Light answered flatly. Obviously he was feeling snubbed and rudely ignored by the amorous couple.

"Police officer?" she guessed, despite knowing she was wrong.

"Detective," he corrected, his eyes focusing on her face. "How long have you two been dating?"

"It's only been a short while, but sometimes it feels like forever," Lily replied straining to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. She handed Hideki a cupcake. "He only loves me for my cupcakes. I have no illusions about that."

Everyone except Hideki laughed because he was too busy cramming the cupcake into his mouth.

"Don't be so modest. I love you for your cookies too," he said, picking up a second cupcake. "And your cakes, and pastries, and...may I have this? "

"We get the idea that you love anything sweet," she chuckled. "Yes, you can have that."

They shared another round of laughter dispelling any tension there might have been. Lily started to feel surprisingly calm, actually enjoying the company of her ex boyfriend, his new girlfriend, and her pretend boyfriend.

"Do you play any sports?" Kiyomi asked her, glancing at her upper arms.

"No. I take yoga and ballet classes," Lily answered, holding out one of the veggie skewers to Hideki.

He stared at it as if were a lethal creature ready to bite him. He sniffed it, then wrinkled his nose in disgust. She shrugged and ate the fancy flower shaped vegetables herself.

"Do you dance for a company?" Light inquired next.

"Oh, no," she scoffed, waving her hand as if to shoo away the willy question. "I only dance for fun. I don't perform."

"That's a shame. I would love to see you on stage," he said, ignoring the glare from Kiyomi that was hotter than a blast furnace.

Lily had started the ballet and yoga classes soon after her release from the hospital as a form of physical and mental therapy. It was not much fun having to relearn how to gain her balance or pick up small objects or judge spacial distance. The bump on her head when she almost split open her skull had really scrambled her brains.

"What about you, Ryuga? You don't look athletic, but did you play any sports?" LIght asked with a snide grin on his handsome face.

"I played tennis. I was the winner of a tournament when I younger as a matter of fact," he added when no one appeared to believe him.

"You? A tournament champion?" Light snorted derisively.

"Would you like to have a match?" Hideki challenged him.

"Sure. How about this Saturday?"

"Sounds great."

"I'll make another picnic lunch," Lily offered.

"Wonderful! Can I bring anything to help?" Kiyomi asked.

"How about drinks? And lots of water. These two egomaniacs are going to need it."

It was bound to be quite a lively competition between the two men shooting metaphorical daggers at each other from across the picnic blanket.

Their conversation turned to banal, safe topics such as movies, books, and music. Lily became content listening mostly, offering occasional comments or opinions when directly asked. Otherwise, she did not bother contributing to the conversation. The fear of giving something away, letting some clue to her identity slip, prevented her from being an active participant in the discussion.

She quickly became aware of when Light's gaze lingered on her a little too long. Mostly because each time Light studied her too much Hideki would touch her. A stroke of fingertips down her upper arm, a hand on her thigh, an arm around her shoulders, something to let the other man know in no uncertain terms 'she belongs to me.'

Although Hideki's constant physical contact was encouraging, the whole time Lily felt like she was dying a little. It was nerve wracking to feign being happy, remaining amiable while she felt agitated and downright despondent. She did not want to be here playacting, fabricating an entire relationship to entrap the man she once loved. Yes, past tense. Loved. Fake it until you feel it. That would become her new motto.

Lily glanced at the unusual man sitting beside her in a cross legged position, his feet placed on his upper thighs at his hips; a position usually reserved for the serious yoga practitioners during meditation. There was something about him that fascinated her and made her want to know more about him. He was an extraordinary actor. Pushing people's buttons to elicit a strong emotional reaction was definitely his specialty. At the moment, he was being quite the scintillating conversationalist, holding his own in the intense discussion of the best J-pop groups and the merits of a singer named Misa Misa.

She would never have guessed this bizarre individual would be so interesting, so multifaceted. When the man calling himself Hideki Ryuga appeared at her house after tracking down her guardian to speak to him personally to convince her to help with the investigation, she knew he was no ordinary man and certainly no delusional weirdo. Nor was he a run of the mill private detective. This man did not follow errant husbands or find lost family pets. Although she was not yet sure of his identity, his near obsessive ambition to prove, or maybe disprove, Light being the mass murderer Kira, told her he was much, much more.

"You look tired," Hideki said, halting her runaway train of thoughts. "Are you ready to go?"

"What? Oh," she mumbled, embarrassed she had taken an unscheduled mental vacation. "I'm a little worn down. We've been super busy at the bakery. There's been a lot of orders for the upcoming lantern festival."

"Oh, a festival. I love festivals," Kiyomi cooed.

"Why don't we all get together and go?" Hideki suggested, taking Lily's hand in his.

"Sure. A double date sounds like fun. What do you think, Lily?" Light asked her pointedly.

Lily caught his eyes. He seemed to look through her rather than at her. His deep brown eyes tracked back and forth between hers like he was searching for something deep inside of her where she hid her true self. No amount of make-up, colored contacts, or a different name would hide her from him much longer.

She knew that look. Hideki would get that look as well. The expression of deep thought, of actively seeking an answer. Light was figuring things out, putting the puzzle pieces together in his big, big brain. The hamster was on the wheel and the gears were turning. Light knew. He had to know. Once he abandoned his preconceived assumption Sachiko was gone and gone for good, he would allow himself to perceive what he already knew.

"Sounds like fun," Lily said with more enthusiasm than she actually felt.

Maybe the more she was around Light, the less these encounters would hurt. She had already numbed herself to Hideki's many degrees of bullshit out of self-defense. Eventually she would become anesthetized to the old feelings and memories of her past relationship with Light. The past was the past after all. No bringing it back, no changing it.

"Great! It's a date then," Hideki said, squeezing her hand. "You should go home. Get some rest."

"Home. Yeah, sure," she murmured sadness tainting her voice. Hopefully, they would believe it was only her tiredness.

Home he said. Home is where the heart is, the elusive committee of 'they' says. Lily glanced at Light, then at Hideki. Where was her heart? Perhaps the more appropriate question would be with whom should she trust her heart? Should it remain with one who pretends to be good and honest but is not? Or an admitted liar who seems to have a good heart?

Hideki pulled his cell phone out of the back pocket of his jeans. Holding it between his thumb and forefinger of one hand, he poked at the buttons with the tip of the forefinger of his other hand. The phone swayed back and forth awkwardly, but he somehow managed to type out the text anyway.

"Thank you for the food, Lily. It was wonderful," Kiyomi complimented, assisting with gathering up the empty dishes to put them back in the basket.

"Those cupcakes were amazing," Light said, taking her hand to help her to her feet.

"Thank you," she returned, attempting to pull her hand from his but he held on. Her entire body tingled from his touch.

"Perhaps I can come by the bakery some time to discuss a special order with you."

"Sure. Any time."

"Sweetheart," Hideki murmured, forcibly pulling her hand from Light's. "I'll walk you to the car."

Lily lay the folded picnic blanket over her arm while Hideki carried the basket for her. She appreciated his guidance of gentle pressure on her elbow. His touch steadied her, keeping her tethered to this earth thwarting the sensation of surrealism that wanted to separate her from reality.

"He knows," she declared when they had walked a sufficient distance away from Light and Kiyomi not to be heard.

"It's all right. I think we both knew this would happen. He will be careful. He won't make a move quickly," he assured her. "When he does, he won't hurt you."

"How can you be so sure?" she asked, linking her arm through his.

"His first move will be to test you, to be one hundred percent sure of your identity. His ego cannot handle the prospect of making a mistake in such an important matter," he said, leaning close to her.

He was certainly right about that. Light was cautious, methodical, thorough. His slowness to act until completely self-satisfied with his infallibility was probably the only reason they had never had sex. He did not want to act rashly risking rejection.

"He will act hurt, indignant," Hideki continued. "The whole 'how could you do this to me?' kind of thing. After that he will attempt to rekindle the old flame, see if there's anything left there for him. Being the kind of guy he is, he will assume he still has that emotional hold on you. How you respond will determine his next move."

Watari stood beside the car located at the curb at the end of the sidewalk. Patient as ever, he waited until they were near the car before opening the door for her. He took the blanket from her and the picnic basket from Hideki to put them in the car.

"How do you want me to respond?" she asked, turning to face Hideki.

"I will decide when the time comes. We should see how things progress with the case until then. I'm going to kiss you," he warned her, sliding his arms around her waist.

"But - " Her protest was cut off by his mouth pressing to hers.

His kiss was tender, unassuming, and brief. Quite nice actually except for being a public display of affection between two virtual strangers. But it was necessary to complete the facade of the close relationship they were supposed to be in. It would also offend and piss off Light for a myriad of reasons.

"You know this kind of thing is frowned upon even in modern day Japan," she told him.

"I know. So if it makes the general public uncomfortable, it's bound to be an issue for Light Yagami," he said, the tiniest hint of dark glee in his voice. "I'm sure it would upset him for being more than a social faux pas. You were his once after all. Now you're mine. As far as he knows."

"You enjoy antagonizing people, don't you?"

"Certain people, yes," he admitted. "It's a necessary part of the job. People make mistakes when enraged, acting in the heat of passion."

She could feel herself redden at the phrase 'heat of passion.'

"You really are a modest thing, aren't you?" Hideki gave her an innocent kiss on the forehead and a hug. "I'll be back later. We still have to attend our afternoon classes."

Once situated in the back seat, Lily traced her lips with her fingers. Kissing him had been astonishingly pleasant. It was odd and difficult being thrust into a relationship, having to pretend they were embroiled in a deeply emotional love affair. Emotionally overwhelmed and physically exhausted, she wanted to take a nap.

"Oh, god, how am I ever going to survive this?"


	25. L is for Love and Other Disasters

After returning to the hotel, Lily took a long swim to cool off. It was too damn hot. Swimming laps until her arm and leg muscles burned, she then settled into the hot tub which eased away the painful strain. She baked herself in the sun a bit then retreated to the shade of the portico with a book and bottle of cold, carbonated water.

Hideki joined her on the balcony when he arrived. It was close to sunset. Pastel swipes of pink, lavender, and peach painted on the darkening horizon of the sun bleached blue sky. He handed her another frosty can of carbonated water.

"It's hot. You better stay hydrated," he said, sitting down on the bed in front of her but keeping his back to her.

"That will be my line on Saturday," she rejoined, popping the top of the can and taking a long draw. "Thank you."

"You did very well today. That was an award worthy performance," he complimented her.

"You think?" She ran her finger around the rim of the can while a blush spread across her face. "You were a great cheerleader who helped me get through it. You could have won a little gold trophy or two yourself for those brilliant acting chops."

"Was it difficult seeing him today?"

"Yes," she answered tersely, laying back on the bed. She stared up at the white canopy above her. "More difficult than you can imagine."

"Do you still love him?" he inquired, lying down beside her on his back.

"I don't think so," she sighed. She hated that question. "I might. I don't know. He still makes my heart beat faster. When I'm near him, my palms sweat , and my stomach hurts. I get dizzy. I feel like I want to run."

"Yes, well, those symptoms correspond with anxiety attacks as well," he mused dryly. "I find it quite disturbing that the physical response to love is so similar to a sometimes crippling psychological condition."

Lily giggled. "Trust me. Depending on who you fall in love with, it can be a traumatic psychological condition."

"Are you all right?" he inquired, a hint of genuine concern in his monotone voice.

"Better than I thought I would be actually," she replied, turning her head to look at him. She inhaled sharply and blinked to find herself staring into his huge intense eyes. "So how did i do? Did I pass all of your tests?"

"With flying colors.

"Are you done testing me?"

"Yes," he answered flatly.

"How do we proceed with our relationship?"

"I don't know. I've never been in a romantic relationship," he admitted, reaching out to touch her cheek.

When his fingertips stroked her skin, a thousand butterflies took flight in her belly. Her fingers trembled when she extended her hand to mirror his action by gliding her fingers over his high cheekbone. His eyes never left hers, pulling her into their dark depths.

"This is a pretty good start," she told him. "Have you ever been in love?"

"No. But I think I could fall in love," he said, his voice low, a little bit husky and extremely enticing to her ears.

The bed under her pitched and swayed as if the earth itself were moving. His forefinger traced the curve of her jaw, slipping from her chin to slide down the length of her neck. Her breathing became labored. She swallowed the lump in her throat when his finger followed the line of her collarbone to her shoulder. Sweat beaded on her forehead and upper lip. Her palm cupped his cheek when he edged closer to her.

"I think I'm having an anxiety attack," she confessed. Rolling over, allowing his fingers to gradually slip off her shoulder, she scooted to the edge of the bed to get up. "I'm going to cook dinner."

Hideki's touch was so gentle. She had surprised herself by not shying away. Even when he had touched her on the thigh at the picnic today, she had found it comforting. The placement of his hand had hinted at intimacy they did not actually share but were required to play act to carry out a believable charade.

Heat enveloped her in a full body blush when she realized she had allowed him to touch her in such a familiar way. The intimate moment they experienced on the bed had progressed so naturally, she never felt the need to stop him. She had wanted him to touch her. Perhaps because she longed for the soothing affection after such a trying day.

Light had spoiled her with his tender caresses and soft kisses. His embrace had been so warm and comforting. Watching him trade longing gazes with Kiyomi, expressing private thoughts in silence, had been like a dagger in her heart. They appeared to be enjoying an old-fashioned courtship. She had enjoyed that kind of sweet relationship with him. They never even got beyond first base.

In contrast, Hideki had been much bolder which seemed to be his method of operation. He blatantly touched her in a way reserved for people involved in an especially close relationship. He had already pushed her boundaries further than Light ever did.

However, the truth of relationships could be much different behind closed doors. Light and Kiyomi could be in a sexual relationship whereas she and Hideki had just met and slept in separate rooms about fifteen hundred square feet apart.

The truth was quickly becoming an extremely transitional concept to her, constantly changing in meaning and scope. Having so many shades of gray and barely perceptible nuances, sheer frustration made her want to give up trying to sort out what she believed to be the truth. In a way, she had gained a small understanding of how Light had strayed so far from his original, somewhat admirable, goals.

Lily cooked a basic, easy dinner of vegetable lo mein. She doubted Hideki would eat it anyway. He would mostly likely finish off the last three chocolate cupcakes with orange buttercream icing and call it dinner. Despite that fact, she put two plates on the table in the sitting area near his office where he sat at the computer.

One plate was for Mr. Watari whose quiet presence she found calming. He was like a friendly ghost moving about quietly and unobtrusively, taking care of the many behind the scenes details for Ryuga.

After eating her dinner in the kitchen, she took a shower and went to bed. It had been a stressful, tiring day for her.

Lily dreamed about Light. She dreamed of the way she wished things could have been. They dated while he attended To Oh, and she continued working at Tanaka's Bakery. After he graduated, they were engaged. When he became a ranking detective in the force, they were married. Three years later when their first child, a boy, was born, she quit work to stay at home to be a housewife and mother. Two years later, another child, a girl, was born. A perfect, happy family.

The dream shattered, ending upon hearing the first cries of her newborn daughter who would never exist. Caught somewhere in the confusing world between dream and reality, she could hear a mewling sound like the keening of an injured animal. As she drifted closer to reality, the sound grew louder into a pathetic, lamenting wail like that of a woman in mourning.

What was making that awful noise? Hideki must be watching a movie. Something wet touched her lower lip. She licked at the liquid and it tasted salty. Tears?

Lily gingerly pressed her fingertips to her cheeks damp with tears. She was crying. The pitiful sobbing was coming from her. Her hand went to her chest, pressing to her tortured heart. Still beating despite being broken. Her fingers formed a fist, clutching her nightgown.

She cried. She mourned for a future she would never have. One that was never meant to be in the first place.

Afterwards, Lily lay in the darkness listening to the unbroken silence on the other side of the door. Rolling her head to the side, she could see the alarm clock sitting on the dresser across the room. Almost two thirty. She had gone to bed exceptionally early so her body felt rested. Wide awake and no longer drowsy, she decided to get up. A cup of tea and a book would be great at such a time.

Lily opened her boxes of books that she had yet to unpack and searched through them. She picked the art book to casually thumb through while drinking her tea. The second book, a cheesy romance novel, would be an amusing diversion from her own ridiculous love life.

Walking toward the kitchen, she glanced over at the computer desk to see Hideki sitting there. _Tea for two it is_ , she thought to herself.

While the water boiled in a whistling tea kettle on the stove, Lily filled the ceramic panda tea diffuser with ginger lemon tea hanging it on the side of a green tea cup made to look like a piece of bamboo cut straight from the stalk. She chose a cup that looked like a red rose and the saucer the leaves.

"The rose of To Oh," she muttered aloud to herself, spooning rose petals into the round metal diffuser with the black tea leaves. What an ass! Light had to have done that on purpose, mocking her name. She was almost one hundred percent positive he recognized her.

Lily arranged the cookies she had brought home from the bakery yesterday on a plate. The sharp whistle of the tea kettle pierced the quiet atmosphere. Hideki leaned back in chair, looking at her across the long span of distance between them. After she waved at him, he stretched then sat back up straight to return to his computer.

Once everything was set on a tray, she went to him. Lily put the tray on the second desk where only a closed silver laptop sat.

A bank of screens, twelve in total, lined the wall, from the ceiling to the floor behind the desks. She had no idea those large screens were there because they were hidden by the wall jutting out offering a sense of separation yet openness between this and the living room. She had assumed it was a little nook where the single desk sat. That would teach her to assume anything. Nothing should be assumed concerning Hideki Ryuga.

"Can't sleep?" he questioned her without looking away from the screens.

There were news broadcasts from all over the world on the top three screens. The second row of three screens showed changing images of mugshots of criminals on the first, photo id's of police officers in their uniforms on the second, and locations of the mysterious homicides on a map on the third. More red dots popped up on the map as she watched. The other six were of live feeds that appeared to be from cameras located in people's houses.

Her eyes became riveted to the second screen in the third row. She saw Light laying in his bed, the sheet covering his body from the waist down leaving his bare chest and arms revealed. His eyes were open and staring at the ceiling. One of his arms raised to lay across his forehead, and she heard a lengthy sigh from him. As if the camera was not enough of an intrusion, the rooms were bugged as well.

Her belly contracted with apprehension. She reached behind her for the chair, pulling it under her to sit before she fell down. Her eyes were glued to the screen bearing Light's half naked image. She found herself unable to look away despite feeling like a dirty voyeur.

"What is this?" she asked, shocked by what she was seeing. Just when she thought he could not shock her anymore, Ryuga finds away.

There were several other people under surveillance. Some were whole families, the separate frames of each room, grouped together in a cluster on a single monitor. At this time, with the exception of Light, they were all sleeping.

"I'm monitoring these people to rule out suspects," he answered her question before she could ask it.

"Why a whole family?"

"Because I believe Kira is a member of the Japanese police force or possibly one of their family members. That's why the whole family is being watched."

"But I thought you were positive Light is Kira," she said, sliding his cup of tea over to him.

"Only ninety percent," he rejoined, reaching for a cookie. "Although I'm mostly sure he's Kira, I can't totally rule out the others. Or that there's a possibility he has an accomplice."

Then a horrible thought occurred to her. "Is there a camera in my bedroom?"

"No," he answered candidly. "I can simply go in there and watch you sleep any time I want to."

"Oh, that's comforting," she murmured, bringing her cup up to her lips. She liked his extremely dry, sarcastic wit. Although he probably meant what he said because he had already watched over once.

Inhaling the delicate rose scent before taking a drink, Lily relished the floral flavor imparted by the petals. Her throat somehow remained dry. There was something she wanted to say. She needed confirmation of a theory she had formed that afternoon while waiting on him to get back. Her theory had pretty much solidified into concrete fact upon seeing his workstation.

"So you're L," LIly stated abruptly.

The man did not seem surprised. He did not even bother to take his eyes off the monitors to glance at her. "When did you know?"

"For sure? Not until now to be honest." She spun around in a full circle in the swiveling chair before continuing to speak. "Needless to say things have been a little bit confusing and hectic as of late so it took me a minute to figure it out. Forgive me for being a little slow on the uptake."

Lily had put her necklace back on after her shower and reached up to fiddle with it. She wet her uncommonly dry throat with another sip of tea before continuing.

"When we first met, I thought you were just some crackpot who fancied himself a detective. A rich kid with too much money and time on his hands. I figured you got your information about me from a friend who works at the police department with access to that kind of sensitive information," she added because that friend was important to the first convoluted explanation she had fashioned for herself to make sense of this man. "You know, someone like Light. I even considered that he had hired you to find me."

"So why did you come with me?" he inquired, genuinely curious about her motives.

"When you showed up at my house, Mr. Okada believed you. I believed him and trusted his opinion before I trusted you," she admitted. "Then I started thinking, well, maybe you're not crazy, and you must be a real detective after all. You're not just any detective either. You're _the_ detective _._ You're L. You're the L who confronted Kira on national tv and called him out. You'll be the one to catch him."

"You really are a clever girl. I like you," he stated as if it were a simple fact like the sky is blue.

"That's nice to know," she murmured actually feeling quite pleased by receiving his praise and approval. "Is this what you're really like? Quiet and calm. Analytical. Logical. Not the gigantic jerk you've been to me since we met?"

"Like you said this afternoon, I was testing you. I had to make sure you could handle the pressure. I was ninety six percent positive you could withstand the stress but I wanted to make sure of it myself. Although I can be, and will be, a gigantic jerk to get the information I need to solve a case."

"What you said about me being the textbook definition of a psycopathic murderer - "

"Don't worry about that," he interrupted her. "I believe most humans have the potential of becoming murderers if subjected to a certain set of stimuli." He sighed. "Therein lies the problem of testing that theory to develop an actual statistical percentage. The circumstances, the motivation, the trigger, if you will, is different for everyone."

L turned in his chair to look at her. Lily had pulled her legs into the chair, placing her feet on the seat and her knees to her chest. She balanced her teacup on one of her knees while still holding onto the handle.

"For you the loaded gun was the years of systemic abuse inflicted upon you by your uncle." He raised his hand with a forefinger pointed at her, his thumb pointing upwards. Mimicking a gun like children do, he lowered his thumb and without raising his voice, he said, "Bang. And the thing that pulled the trigger was when he attacked you. You'd had enough and wasn't going to let him do that to you again."

Lily sipped her tea. He was correct. He had read the police report. Although she had not graphically detailed her abuse during her statement, she had spoken of the length of time and the steady increase of violence. L was smart enough to fill in the blanks.

"Are you all right? I heard you crying," he said, rotating his chair back to face the screens.

"I'm fine. Just a bad dream," she murmured, glancing at the screens. She looked at the one showing Light's bedroom. He had turned onto his side and fallen asleep. Did he ever dream about her? "Do you have dreams L?"

"I hardly ever sleep. But I'm sure you had already guessed that. I'm totally aware of the set of luggage and dark circles I have under my eyes. There's too much to do and see and think about to sleep," he said, picking up his cup using only forefinger and thumb. "Are you going to be up for a while?"

"For a little while," she answered, lifting her cup so she could extend her legs and stand up. She took an oatmeal raisin cookie from the plate. "I'll go over here to the living room to read so I won't bother you."

"You're not bothering me," he assured her. "But you would be more comfortable on the couch."

"Try to get some sleep, L," she murmured, feeling his long cool fingers wrapping around her wrist. Since she was holding her teacup in that hand, she stood completely still to keep from spilling her tea. Her eyes made contact with his that looked like ebony marbles, hard and glassy.

"Don't call me that unless it's just the two of us," he told her, his eyes holding hers. "Do you understand?"

"I do...Hideki. I know how important it is to keep your true identity secret. You promised to protect me, I'll do the same for you," she promised. Impetuously, Lily bent down pressing a feathery kiss to his lips. "I swear. I'll do what it takes to make this work. That includes keeping all of your secrets."


	26. Survive or Thrive?

Lily came out of the back to assist Ai with the morning breakfast rush that always occurred before classes started. To her great dismay, her first customer of the day was none other than Light Yagami. He was not what she needed today. Or any other day for that matter.

"Do you have a minute?" he asked her.

Lily glanced at the line that stretched out the door, past the front window, and out of sight down the sidewalk. "Not at the moment. If you want to come back this afternoon - "

"I can wait. My first class doesn't begin until nine."

"Can I get you something while you wait?"

"A raspberry white chocolate scone and black coffee," her ordered, giving her a million dollar smile.

At the moment, his smile was not worth two cents to her. She was unimpressed. Not only did her heart not speed up, she did not feel the urge to return to smile. After getting his order, she put it by the register for Ai to ring him up.

"I would bring it to you, but..." Then she trotted off to get the next customer's order.

Under different circumstances, Lily would have been glad to see the madness of the morning rush come to an end. Casting a glimpse at Light sitting at her consulting table in the corner, she wiped the same six inches of counter for the third time. She continued to dilly dally by assisting with the restocking of the food display cases cleared out by hungry university students and office workers.

"You're procrastinating," Ai said, taking the tray of chocolate chip cookies from her. "Get over there and talk to him. The sooner you do, the sooner he will leave."

"I know, but - "

"Get your butt over there before I kick it," her coworker teased, giving her a soft kick in the bum.

"Fine," Lily sighed, snatching off her apron.

Lily took a cup of coffee and the coffee pot with her. She refilled Light's mug before taking a seat across from him. She had expected him to give up waiting for her and leave. He said his class started at nine. According the tea pot shaped clock on the wall, the time was presently ten minutes after nine.

"You're late for your class," she told him although she was sure he already knew.

"It doesn't matter. It's an ethics class," he rejoined with a shrug.

 _Well, then it really doesn't matter in that case_ , she thought to herself, pouring cream from the little metal pitcher on the table. She emptied it out, making a mental note that those would have to be refilled before the after lunch crowd seeking desserts and afternoon caffeine jolts to finish out their day descended upon the bakery like a flock of vultures. Being busy made the days pass quickly. She should be in the back baking to keep the dessert cases filled and to prepare orders for the lantern festival.

The lantern festival. God. Lily glanced at the man sitting across from her casually sipping his coffee as if he had no where else he should be. She wanted to light a lantern for her parents this year. The last time she attended the festival was when her parents were alive. But he would be there. That would be another coincidental commonality between her and his former girlfriend giving her away. But it was only a matter of time before he confronted her about her identity. Yet she wanted hide behind her mask, no matter how much cracked, as long as she could.

"Hey, space case," he said, snapping his fingers in her face.

"Excuse me?" she muttered indignantly. Those words were an unwanted remnant of the past. Her eyebrows knitted together in genuine annoyance.

"Do you often retreat deep into your own head like that?" he inquired, gazing into her eyes. "I once knew someone who did that all the time."

"I'm just a little tired. I did not sleep well last night." That was the truth. "As you saw, we stay busy here."

"Is it always like that?"

"Yes."

"Are you looking forward to the lantern festival Friday night?" he inquired.

"Look, Light, I have a lot of baking to get to. I'm sure you're not missing a class to make small talk. What do you want?" she questioned him pointedly.

"What are you doing tomorrow night?" He got to the point just as she had requested.

"Wait, what?" She set her coffee down not willing to risk choking by taking a sip at the wrong time. This conversation had suddenly gone very wrong. Perhaps she should ask him to clarify his meaning before jumping to conclusions. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

"Yes," he answered succinctly.

"No," she replied tersely.

His eyes widened briefly, then he blinked as if a tad befuddled by her swift and vehement refusal . "Did you just - "

"Yes, I just turned you down. Something I'm sure you're not accustomed to. What about Kiyomi? Isn't she your girlfriend? What would she think about this?"

"She's _one_ of my girlfriends," he corrected her. "We're not exclusive yet. We've only been on one date."

"Wow," she breathed, leaning back in her chair. "Are you being serious right now?"

She folded her arms under her breasts as if to protect herself from the Lothario in her presence. Unbelievable. He had gone from not showing up to the game at all to playing the whole damn field.

"We can go out as friends. Nothing special or romantic. Dinner. Perhaps a walk on the waterfront. A nice cool breeze from the river would be great on a hot summer's night. Small talk. I want to know more about you."

"Uhm, well," she began, placing both of her hands around her mug. The temptation to throw it at him grew stronger the longer he stared at her with that funny little grin on his face. Arrogance had always been his trademark but it seemed worse than ever. "Hideki and I are exclusive. We _are_ like _that_."

"You can't be serious," he scoffed, leaning forward as if he wanted to share a secret with her. "You mean to tell me, you and Hideki are _really_ a thing?"

"Yes," she responded in earnest, taking a drink of her coffee. She grimaced. It had already grown cold. The facial expression could have easily expressed her present disgust for him. However, as she recalled, Light liked to play on people's emotions and press buttons as well. God, he and Hideki had a lot in common.

"How did you two meet?" he challenged her as if she were on a quiz show.

"Well, duh, here of course. He's one of my best customers. He was practically the first one in the door when we opened. I'm sure you're aware of his penchant for everything sweet," she remarked, propping her chin on her hand with her elbow on the table.

"Mmm, yes, including you," he murmured, his grin widening until he was simpering at her.

 _Oh, how charming. That sure hadn't changed about him either_ , she thought. "Did you think I was kidding when I said he loved me for my sweets?'

"How exclusive are you?" he inquired, leaning forward to narrow the gap between them to inches.

"We live together," she replied bluntly.

His expression of shock was more rare than a red diamond and just as precious. His mouth dropped open and his big brown eyes grew so big she feared they would pop out of the sockets. As usual, his incredible powers of composure kicked in and he closed his mouth and blinked slowly to return his eyes to their normal size.

"I still want to learn more about you," he said, picking up her hand resting on the table. He held it between the two of his, noting its size and the callouses on her fingertips. "You remind me of someone."

"I bet," she responded coldly, pulling her hand free from being sandwiched between his. Being angry with him made it easy to pretend she had no idea what he was hinting at. "Look, Light, I won't judge you for conducting your relationship, or rather relationships, however you want to, but as for me, Hideki is the only one."

"Fine," he rejoined, shrugging noncommittally. "We can go out as friends at least, can't we?"

"You're Hideki's friend. Not mine," she responded caustically. She stood up from the table, picking up the coffee pot. "If you'll pardon me, Mr. Yagami. I must get back to work."

"I'll see you Friday night at the festival, Lily. I'm looking forward to seeing you again."

 _That makes one of us._

~~~\\\/~~~

 _It's you. I know it's you, Sachiko,_ Light thought to himself irritably. He had been suspicious of her identity from the moment he first saw her sitting in that very chair when he walked into this bakery. Now he could not be convinced otherwise despite her protests. The truth had slapped him in the face and awakened him from his stupor of denial.

Sachiko had changed but not enough for him not to recognize her. The golden tan had eradicated most of her freckles but the absence of her make up today permitted the barely bronze smattering of spots across her nose and cheekbones be seen. He had hated those freckles once, so prominent on her ivory skin. In the short time they had been together he had come to adore them, sometimes counting them but losing count due to the sheer amount of them.

Today she was wearing her glasses instead of contacts which allowed him to see their dark storm cloud gray color. It did not matter what color her eyes were, her every emotion showed as easily as if he were looking at her soul through a glass window. She never was a good liar.

She still had that cute nervous stammer too. She also turned red to the tips of her ears when agitated.

Ah, the little things. The tiny nuances about her that no one but a man in love would notice had been what betrayed her, revealing her true identity to him. The devil is in the details, and this devil remembered every detail about her.

He did not believe her about her relationship with Ryuga. There was no way she was actually his girlfriend. Did she really live with him? Surely not.

All of those revolting displays of affection had been staged to rile him up. It had almost worked too. Sachiko had barely held his hand in public much less allowed him to kiss her on the lips like Hideki had - not just once but twice right in front of him. It must have killed her to have that man's hands all over her. Poor Sachiko, what had she gotten herself into?

* * *

~\\..'../~

"I'm home!" Lily sang out, walking into the massive suite.

 _Might as well call it home,_ she mused to herself. She would be living here for who knew how long.

"You're late," Hideki sang back. He leaned back in his desk chair to glare at her while she poured herself a glass of water in the kitchen. "Do you not know how to answer a phone or text back?"

Lily smiled. "I'm sure you have the GPS turned on so you can find me. I bet you can access any camera, any where in the city, at any time. You knew I was all right."

"That's not the point," he said, his voice never changing its usual emotionless tone.

Lily heard his chair creak when he got up fast enough for it spring forward into an upright position. His steps were soundless but his baggy clothes made a sound that reminded of sheets flapping freely in the breeze. She was putting a slice of chocolate raspberry cake on a plate for him.

"I had to go back to the bakery to catch up on orders after attending yoga class. Here," she murmured, holding the plate out to him. "I made this for you today. Try it."

Hideki poked at a raspberry peeking through the thick slab of moist dark chocolate cake. He raised the plate to his nose and sniffed. The glossy chocolate ganache icing painted the tip of his nose brown.

Lily chuckled, grabbing a dish cloth to wipe off the icing. Instead, she leaned forward to lick it off. That mischievous little grin of Hideki's spread his lips into a smile so wide she feared it might split his face. If he said something dirty at this moment, she would never forgive him.

"So does this mean I belong to you?" he asked, picking the whole raspberry off the top of the cake.

Lily pretended to be agitated, then she shrugged her shoulders and sighed in resignation. "I suppose so."

She was growing accustomed to the idea of them 'belonging' to each other since they were stuck together even if their romantic relationship was a farce. Maybe he really wasn't such a bad guy.

"Things could be worse," he mumbled around a bite of cake. "You could be a new addition to Light's harem."

"You know about all the women he's dating?" she inquired, glaring at him.

"Of course I do. I'm his friend after all." He shrugged, shoving another fork full of cake into his big mouth.

The sincerity with which he made the declaration, his genuine belief that Light was his dear friend, made her heart ache for him.

"You think so, huh?" She filled the kettle with water to prepare them cups of coffee using the pour over method to brew a single serving straight into a cup. "Light came by the bakery today. He asked me out on a date. So it's not for lack of trying that I'm not a new addition to his harem."

"What did you say to him?" he questioned her, cutting himself another piece of cake.

" I told him I was totally devoted to you."

"Are you?"

"Am I what?" She tucked the filters into the pourover drippers on top of their cups.

Hideki grabbed her hands to stop her before she could begin spooning the ground coffee into the filters. He held her still until she looked at him.

"Are you devoted to me?" He held her chin between his thumb and forefinger raising it so she would look into his eyes.

"Hideki, please, I said what I needed to say. This is not a normal relationship and - "

"Answer the question. It's simple. Yes or no. No long explanations. No excuses. Answer," he gently prodded her in his soft voice. "Are you devoted to me?"

"Yes," she replied succinctly as he had requested. "You're all I have now. I have to trust you despite you admitting you're a liar. I'll be loyal to you, Hideki."

"You don't have to call me that. It's just the two of us," he murmured, cupping his hands around her cheeks and jaw.

"I'll call you that to keep your secret, L," she whispered. "I won't call you by your real name on a regular basis until it's safe to do so. I won't betray you. On purpose or by accident."

"There's a twenty percent chance you will betray me for Light."

"That high, huh?"

Lily pulled her hands from his to measure coffee into the drippers. Feeling a bit slighted and hurt by his distrust, she used making the coffee as an excuse to ignore him. She could not blame him for not fully trusting her especially since she had a past emotional connection to Light. However, that connection was the whole reason he had brought her here. If there was even a remote chance of her betraying him, of her going back to Light, why did he bother?

The tea kettle released a shrieking whistle to signal its readiness. She picked it up to carefully pour the boiling hot water over the grounds.

"Are you angry with me?" Hideki asked.

"No," she replied in a sigh, continuing her slow, methodical dousing of the grounds.

"You're lying."

"Yes, Sherlock, I'm lying."

Although Lily wanted to throw the piping hot kettle across the room, she put it back down on the stove burner. The silence between them was absolutely deafening. A dull thudding started in her temples. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she closed her eyes to ward off the headache.

"Look, all of this is really difficult for me. I'm still struggling to grasp this entire bizarre situation. I want to make the best of it since it's a necessary inconvenience to everyone involved."

"What are you saying?" He studied her intently with those big, dark eyes of his.

She could never tell what he was thinking, but he was always thinking. **Always thinking**. But what did he feel? His feelings were an even bigger mystery to her.

"I don't know what I'm saying," she sniffed. "Never mind. Forget that I said anything."

She picked up the drippers, setting them in the sink. She pushed the sugar bowl full of sugar cubes over to Hideki then put his coffee cup down beside it. Her shoulder brushed his when she walked past him to the refrigerator. For a second there a tingling sensation in her arm as if an electrical charge had passed between them.

"Have you thought about what you're going to do when this is over?" Hideki questioned her out of the blue.

Lily put down the pint of cream and closed the refrigerator door. The idea having to plan her life beyond this situation had not occurred to her. For years she had lived her life barely able to think past the next twenty-four hours. She had been stuck in survival mode since her parents' deaths. Always living in the moment but dreading what tragedy each new minute, new hour, new day, could bring.

"I-I d-don't kn-know," she stuttered, giving him a quivering smile.

"Would you consider staying with me?" he asked, dropping sugar cubes into his coffee. With the other hand, he started arranging sugar cubes to form the base of a small pyramid.

"Why would you want me to stay with you?"

Hideki shrugged not looking at her. His attention was on constructing the white crystalline cube pyramid. "I told you. I like you."

 _But this isn't how relationships are supposed to be made,_ she thought. Then she snorted in derisive laughter directed at herself. She knew absolutely nothing about how 'normal' relationships were supposed to be formed or progress to something meaningful.

The relationship she had with her uncle was so many levels of messed up she could not even begin to count them. Her brief romance with Light had seemed normal and sweet, but there was always the nagging doubt of his ulterior motives. Her hand automatically went to the diamond charm on her necklace to slide it along the chain. Obsession and stalking should never be part of a relationship, she knew that for damn sure.

"Is it really that simple? You like me?" She noted that he was still dropping sugar cubes into his coffee and the pyramid was complete.

When she scooted the sugar bowl away, he commenced to stirring his coffee. The tapping of his silver spoon against the delicate china cup made a pleasant ringing sound in contrast to the noisy clanking of the clunky ceramic mugs.

"Why can't it be that simple? Why do people have to complicate things so much? I like you. I think you like me."

"I do," she confirmed. "But..."

"But what? Then what's the problem?"

"What if one day you don't like me? Or I don't like you?"

"Well, then maybe we should wait until the next day to see how we feel. Emotions are like the weather. They change often and should not be trusted."

Lily sighed. That's not what she meant. Although oversimplified and a little childish, she found his logic regarding relationships easy to understand.

Maybe his simplistic way of vewing a situation is what made him such a good detective. He took things at face value. He could cut through the bullshit and bravado; seeing through the masks people wear or hearing the fakeness of an insincere laugh. Although he appeared devoid of emotion, perhaps he not only perceived but expressed emotions on a different level than other people.

"Are you lying to me right now? Because if you are - "

"What do you think?" he interrupted her, finally turning his eyes to her. "So far you've been able to see through my subterfuge quickly. You only allow yourself to be deceived when your emotions get in the way."

"Like with Light? Is that why you believe there's a twenty percent chance I'll betray you? I'll allow him to get to me emotionally?"

"There's a high possibility you'll be compromised. After all, that's what I brought you here for. To manipulate him emotionally. I just need to him to slip once. That's all," he explained.

Lily stared at him. Their conversation had become circular, coming back to where it began several long minutes ago. If she placed her emotions elsewhere, like moving money from a mattress to a secure wall safe, she could protect herself and him.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Emotions can be manipulated, created, and changed. Falling in love with him would not be so bad. Right?

Lily moved to stand close to him, face to face. In his hunched over position, she stood eye to eye with him. She placed her hand on the back of his neck, pulling his head forward to kiss him. The kiss was slow, searching. She was seeking a response from both of them; a reaction whether visceral or physical, to conjure up an emotion. Once upon a time in ancient history, seduction was referred to as a form of sorcery. She was attempting to make a little bit of magic of her own.

She inhaled sharply when he kissed back, pressing his closed mouth harder against hers then parting his lips slightly. A provocative mixture of a whimper and a groan, rolled around in her throat. When his mouth slid from hers, pressing a kiss under her chin, the sound pushed past her lips as a lengthy sigh.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" he whispered in her ear.

Lily bit her lower lip when a sensual tingle surged up her spine bursting at the base of her skull like internal fireworks on her nerve endings. A prickling sensation rushed throughout her entire body making her shiver. His warm breath brushed across her ear and caressed her neck in the most stimulating way. She moaned when his fingers evoked an equally gut wrenching sensation when they glided over her shoulder and across her shoulder blade bared by the T shaped back of her yoga top.

"Actually, I'm trying to seduce both of us into making this relationship more real," she confessed.

His fingers slid through her hair and down the back of her neck before tracing the length of her spine to rest in the small of her back. Pins and needles of the most delightful exhilaration erupted along the path his fingers had taken. For long seconds afterward, she could feel his touch along her backbone though his fingers were no longer there.

"I'm going to ask you a very personal question," Hideki warned her, holding her loosely in his arms.

Her heart pounded in her ears. She could feel the blood pulsing through the veins in her head and neck. What in the world could be so offensive that he actually warned her before asking?

"Did you have sex with Light?"

Oh, no wonder he warned her. Lily's first impulse was to slap him. Her body stiffened, and she felt him pull away slightly.

"No. I did not. Our relationship never had a chance to progress that far," she admitted, her face warming with embarrassment. "Actually, you've touched me in a, shall we say, much more friendly manner than he ever did."

"Oh? Why is that?" He stepped back from her, gazing at her in the same way a doctor observes a patient as if attempting to assess their ailment.

His intense, clinical scrutiny made her feel incredibly uncomfortable. She wondered if he was trying to determine what was wrong with her that Light would not attempt to have sex with her.

"Light was sweet and thoughtful. He was careful not to push me too far because of..." Her words drifted away when a lump formed in her throat nearly choking her. "Because of what happened with my uncle."

"I think I understand."

With that statement, the conversation was over. Hideki took his coffee and his second slice of cake to return to his desk.

Lily slumped against the counter, releasing the breath she had been holding. Relieved and emotionally spent, she took her coffee to the balcony.

Nothing about this situation was going to be easy. She was doing what she had always done in life by adapting to her present circumstances. She would develop a way to not only survive but thrive in this crazy scenario she had been thrown into.


	27. The Fireworks Before The Fireworks

Lily rushed into the suite as if her behind had been lit on fire. Finishing last minute orders had prevented her from leaving the bakery on time. The festival started an hour ago. They were supposed to be meeting Light and Kiyomi at the entrance in five minutes. That was not going to be happening.

"Yes, I know I'm late!" she yelled, kicking off her shoes. They hit the wall with a thunk and landed hazhazardly under the table in the open foyer.

She threw her keys and key card into the crystal bowl immediately regretting it when the thick glass sounding like it might shatter. Thankfully it did not break because there was no time to clean up a mess.

"There's a gift for you on your bed," Hideki told her in his perpetually tranquil voice.

Lily glanced his way to see him standing in the sitting room area. He was standing with his arms held up parallel to the floor making him look like a lower case letter t. He was wearing a blue gray yukata. Watari stood behind him patiently wrapping the black obi around his waist.

The only man she had ever described as beautiful would be Light. Until now. The dark slate color of Hideki's yukata created an eye pleasing contrast with his delicate porcelain doll white skin. His coal black hair was brushed into fluffy, feather-like layers framing his thin face. The ends curled up at the nape of his neck. Poor Watari. The patient man must have spent hours detangling Hideki's untamed locks.

Lily wanted to run her fingers through his hair. It looked so soft.

"What are you staring at?" Hideki questioned her, breaking her free from her fevered musings.

"Uhhhh...n-nothing," she stammered, blushing to the tips of her ears.

"Go get ready," he commanded her quietly. "We're already late."

"Oh, shoot!" she exhaled, running to her room.

Lily needed a quick shower. The ovens were on all day, blasting her with heat every time she opened the doors and transforming the bakery into a veritable sweatshop. There was no escape when she left either due to the summer heat and humidity.

A big white box sat on the foot of her bed. She pulled off the lid to reveal a yukata and a hairpin. Lily picked up the metal hair decoration bearing intricate cloisonné work of several pearly white lilies and their emerald green leaves across the top of the gold tines of the comb. She picked up the white yukata unfurling it to reveal the design of suspended lilies as if they were scattered on the breeze. The flowers started at the waist in a light pink color darkening to deep magenta at the bottom. A pair of geta sandals sat in the bottom of the box.

"Wow," she breathed, gliding her hand along the thin, silky soft cotton.

Her stomach flip flopped in anticipation of wearing the luxurious garment. She showered quickly, daring to take time to wash her hair. After putting on her make up and carefully inserting her green contacts into her eyes, she donned her gorgeous gift.

"Watari," she called, peeking her head out of her bedroom door. "I need your help."

"Yes, Miss. Be right there," he answered dutifully.

Lily was attempting to wrap herself in the fuchsia obi when Watari walked in. Without a word, he took the long piece of silk from her to begin winding it around her waist. While he fiddled with the sash, preparing to tie it in the back, she pulled up her damp hair to make a small messy bun before pushing the comb into her hair above it.

"All done, Miss Lily," he announced. He stood back from her, giving her an appreciative, fatherly once over. "You look positively stunning. No wonder the young master is so taken with you."

"Thank you, Watari." His compliment pleased her so much a smile spread from ear to ear.

"Young Miss, may I speak to you frankly?" he asked politely.

"Of course," she replied, sitting down at her make up table. She twisted springy little curls into place around her face. "And what did I tell you about calling me Miss?"

"Forgive me. It is proper etiquette to refer to you as such."

 _If only some of your impeccable manners would rub off on Hideki,_ she thought to herself, brushing highlighter across the top of her cheekbones.

"Miss Lily, I believe the young master is in love with you," he proclaimed resolutely. "This is the first time he has ever been in love so I doubt he realizes what he is feeling himself."

The topic of conversation blindsided her, setting her ill at ease. Lily gulped, closing her compact with a snap. It was much too soon for Hideki to be in love with her. But how much time did falling in love take? It was easy to fall in love. Staying in love, developing a deeper, stronger bond of lasting love required time - that was the hard part.

"Why would you think he's in love with me?" She fussed and fiddled with her hair to distract herself from the tension that made everything within her straight down to her internal organs tighten like a drum.

"I have taken care of Hideki since he was a small child. I know everything about him. Some things I know better than he knows himself. Such as, his deepest feelings."

 _So deep he doesn't know what he feels_ , her brain supplied. Despite the schmaltzy silliness of the statement, the sentiment did fit.

Watari was privy to Hideki's plan of their fake relationship as to follow along with the guise. Surely their acting was not so convincing that even Watari was being misled by their ruse. The two of them apparently had a very close bond like a father and son. He was extremely attuned to Hideki's thoughts and emotions, anticipating requests and needs before a word was spoken.

"He cannot tell you because he is not good at acknowledging his feelings to himself or expressing them to others," Watari went on, undeterred by her stunned silence.

Those words were definitely true.

Watari stood quietly as if waiting for her to say something. When she did not utter a word, he bowed in apology and continued speaking.

"I am very fond of the man you know as Hideki Ryuga. He is like my own son. Please, Miss, I beg of you, do not take his love for granted. If you must hurt him because you do not feel the same way, do so in the kindest way possible."

Lily closed her eyes to block out the sight of her pale, shell-shocked face. She knew he meant well. Watari loved Hideki and was expressing parental worry. However, his genuine concern did not prevent her from taking offense at his assumption that she cared nothing for Hideki. He did not even give her the benefit of the doubt that she would treat him kindly on the most basic human level barring romantic feelings. Drawing in a deep breath, she chose her next words carefully and applied every ounce of self-control to holding her attitude at bay.

"What do you mean by that?" she asked, placing her hands flat on her make up table. She stared at his reflection in the mirror. "Do you think I care nothing for Hideki? Do you believe I would be intentionally cruel to him?"

"I would say no on both accounts. I know the two of you are putting on an act for a necessary reason. By all means keep up the facade to preserve the case, but be honest with him in private as to how you actually feel. I fear if you misrepresent your emotions, it could destroy him. Love has devastated more good men throughout history than pestilence, famine, and war."

Lily could definitely believe that statement. However, she did not think Hideki would allow the dissolution of their relationship to be catastrophic to his life. She considered what it would do to her if she gave her heart to him, and he callously threw it away.

Her hand subconsciously reached for the necklace. Letting go of Light had been hard. Almost more difficult than putting the past with her uncle behind her. She did not know if she was strong enough to go through loving and letting go again. She did not want to do it. Itachi Okada had warned her she could lose something much more valuable than her life.

 _"What could be more valuable than my life?"_ She had scoffed right in his face, finding his ominous warning preposterous.

His fingertips had pressed against her chest over her heart as if he meant to reach inside and pull it out. His soul searching bottomless black eyes had drilled into hers _. "Don't lose your heart, your soul...the very essence of you. Don't forget how to love, but don't get caught up in the emotion. Use your head more than your heart. Don't use love as a weapon."_

Mr. Okada must be clairvoyant as well as divine. He seemed to be able to peek into her future, preparing her for events to come. Yet his words of advice were always too cryptic to decipher until she found herself in the middle of the situation he had forewarned her about. If she could only divert disaster before it began.

"I already care deeply about him, Watari. The last thing on this earth I would ever want to do is hurt him. In any way," she added, giving him a smile she hoped he found reassuring.

Hurting Hideki would never be intentional but not inevitable. Events in her life inevitably unfolded in a way a trail of desolation and broken souls were left behind. Perhaps, accepting his offer had been a huge mistake - for him. However, he had not actually given her the option to say no.

"Ready?" Hideki inquired, appearing in the open doorway of her room.

"Yes. I'm as ready as I'll ever be," she replied. The exact translation of her statement would be: I am not ready, I never will be ready, but let's go do this thing anyway.

"Take my hand," he ordered gently, extending a hand to her.

Lily found herself smiling at him without having to force the expression. Stepping forward, sliding her feet into her wooden sandals at the end of the bed, she closed the distance between them to press her hand into his. She took great comfort in his hands. They were strong and sure, holding onto her when she needed to be held the most.

"Don't let go," he added, enveloping her hand with his long fingers.

"Never," she swore, returning his unwavering gaze. His eyes spoke volumes, conveying a deeper meaning than hanging onto him in more than a physical sense.

"Stay with me. I'll protect you and keep you safe. Do you believe me?"

"I do."

"I like those words."

Lily held onto him just as he had requested on the elevator ride downstairs. She reluctantly released his hand to slide into the backseat of the car. Once they were settled into the Rolls Royce, Hideki issued her another directive. An unpleasant one.

"I want you to text Light to tell him we are on the way."

"No," she flatly refused.

"Why?" he shot back.

"I don't want to," she argued.

"Why?" he persisted.

"Because then he will have my phone number and can communicate with me any time," she whined.

There was a method behind his madness. There was always a strategic reason for everything he did - or asked her to do. But seriously?

"Open a door. Let him in," Hideki said, giving her his patent mischievous lopsided grin. He handed her his phone so she could see Light's number.

Lily gave him a pleading look, begging him with her currently grass green eyes not to make her do this. She whimpered when he only nodded for her to proceed. Her finger stabbed the phone screen as she typed in the text, then the digits of LIght's phone number copied from Hideki's phone. For a long moment, her finger hovered over send.

 _Here we go,_ she thought, closing her eyes to press the button _._ The word sent popped up in a box behind the text.

Lily [20:04]: _Light, this is Lily. Hideki and I are on the way. Sorry we are running late. We will be there soon._

Light [20:06]: _Lily? Why are you texting me? How did you get my number?_

"Yes, why am I texting him?" she asked herself. "Oh, I know because my current boyfriend is a sadist."

"Current boyfriend? You said that awfully naturally, don't you think?"

Lily patted his cheek tenderly like she was placating her child. She typed in her response to Light then waited for a reply.

Lily [20:08]: _To tell you we're late obviously. Hideki gave me your number because he's a little busy at the moment._

Light [20:10]: _Oh, I see. I will be waiting by the entrance for the two of you._

Sentiment could not be judged from mere letters on a phone screen, but Light seemed disappointed Hideki knew she was texting him. She did not bother to send an okay in return. Leaning back against the seat, she settled in for the car ride to the park. A few minutes later, her phone chirped to alert her to a message.

Light [20:15]: _You know, I can now reach you any time I wish. Thank Hideki for me, will you?_

 _Asshole_. _Thank Hideki. As if._ Yes. She was very much aware of the fact Light could text and call as he pleased. He could aggravate her freely through modern technology. She knew how much he hated losing and Light definitely felt like he had lost her - and to another man no doubt. He must be seething.

Lily had officially embroiled herself into a volatile situation with a few text messages. She would be the rope in the romantic tug-of-war to ensue but that was Hideki's objective. Her job was to be a distraction. She was a mere tool like a chisel to be used to chip away at Light's cold, hard exterior to get to the mushy, messy killer inside.

Her eyes latched onto Hideki who was poking at his phone. He ignored her penetrating glare which prompted her to punch him in the arm.

"Ow," he mumbled, not taking his eyes off of his phone while he rubbed his injured bicep. "What was that for?"

"Don't ignore me when I'm angry with you," she hissed.

"But that's the perfect time to ignore you," he countered, staring at his phone.

"Ugh, you're so aggravating." About that time, her phone went off again.

Light [16:17]: _I'm looking forward to seeing your beautiful face._

 _What the hell..._ She could not fathom how Light could stand beside the woman who was his girlfriend and text flirtatious bullshit. But then again, she did not understand how he could murder thousands, experience zero guilt, and go on with his life as if nothing had happened.

"I have the feeling something big is about to happen. Be prepared," Hideki warned her. "I believe things are about to get extraordinarily interesting."

Her entire body tingled as if each nerve had been infused with an electrical charge. Extraordinarily interesting. The words implied something positive but the event to come would certainly be anything but good. Tonight would be the night her life would take another dramatic and possibly soul crushing turn.

Watari stopped the car at the tall red entrance gate that had been erected for the festival. Light stood next to one of the thick legs of the gate. He was dressed traditionally in a deep blue almost purple yukata. Him choosing the color once reserved for royalty did not surprise her one bit. The hue did not look out of place on him either with the regal lift of his chin while his sharp eyes scanned his kingdom.

Light reached the car by the time Watari opened the door. He stepped up in preparation to take Lily's hand before Watari could do so. Hideki reached from behind Lily, placing his palm into Light's outstretched hand. He maneuvered his body around hers to take advantage of the other man's chivalrous gesture thwarting Light's attempt to touch her so soon.

"Thank you, good sir," Hideki said, turning back to help Lily out onto the sidewalk.

Light's tanned skin turned a brilliant shade of crimson. His lips pressed into a thin white line. He wiped his hand off on the front of his yukata as if he had gotten something on it. Hideki's hands did have a tendency to stay sticky since he was always into the sweets. When Lily emerged from the car to stand in front of Light, his entire face transformed with a warm smile.

"Good evening, Miss White," Light greeted her with unnecessary formality.

"Where is Kiyomi?" she asked, threading her arm through Hideki's.

"She is waiting inside. We've already picked a spot for the fireworks. The three of us can check out the food stalls and games first though."

"Oh, a threesome! I've always wanted to be part of one of those. How exciting!" Hideki exclaimed happily. He bypassed weirdo launching directly into pervert mode.

Lily pinched the inner part of his upper arm, keeping her hand hidden under the sleeve of his yukata in case he decided to say something else lecherous.

White rectangular lanterns and round red lanterns hung from strings criss crossing in the air amidst the trees and lamposts to create a canopy of light throughout the park where the festival was being held. Lanterns were already floating down the small stream that wound its way along the edge of the festivities. There were two distinct traffic flows, one on each side of the wide aisle lined by food stalls on one side and booths housing small carnival games and items for sale on the other. The food stalls were to the right where the incoming foot traffic gravitated first.

The aroma of grilled meat made Lily's tummy grumble. She had not eaten all day. She bought yakitori at the first stall, consuming it as she ambled along, passing the sweet things. Hideki bought a big, glossy red candy apple. Once the meat skewer was finished, she found the taiyaki and purchased two of the cute little fish pastries stuffed with chicken, cabbage, and carrots. A chocolate covered banana was Hideki's second choice in food. Well, at least he was eating fruit.

"Did you want something else? I'll get it for you," Light offered.

"I'm good. I can take care of myself," she responded, managing to remain polite.

"She is more than capable of taking care of herself," Hideki reiterated, patting her hand that rested on his forearm. "But I'm the one who is here to take care of her now."

 _Oh, my god._ Lily was positive she heard the emotional nuclear detonation in Light's head. A heated summer breeze swirled around them but could have easily been the backdraft from of explosive ire resulting from Hideki's purposely enraging statement.

Although he remained silent, Light's eyes burned like hell fire with rage. Lucky for Hideki, looks could not kill, and Light had probably not come prepared to murder anyone while at the festival.

Lily felt like running to escape the withering fallout of the tension that followed. So she did.

"Oh, goldfish!" she exclaimed unhinging herself from Hideki to scuttle to the goldfish scooping booth.

"Want me to win you one?" Hideki asked when he came to stand beside her.

"I'll do it," Light insisted, elbowing Hideki to the side.

Lily rolled her eyes and handed the vendor enough money for five of the little scoops. Five chances to win a living prize. She glanced at the two man standing in front of her. These two viewed her as a living prize, a trophy to be won.

She stooped to survey the fish in the little pool. Her competitors included one nervous looking boyfriend under his girlfriend's close scrutiny and two rambunctious little boys whose mom stood quietly behind them while their father coached them on how to catch the fish without ripping the paper.

A pretty white goldfish with large dark orange spots over its fat body swam past. Long, flowing fins trailed through the water behind it like ribbons. She wanted to catch the lovely Princess Goldfish. It might be a boy but she had no way of knowing so Princess it is regardless.

Having spotted her desired fish, Lily prepared to catch it. Hovering the little paper lined paddle above the water, she herded the fish toward the side of the round plastic pool. When the fish bumped its nose into the side, she swiftly swooped down to scoop it up. The wet paper stayed intact despite the fish flopping around on top.

"Way to go, pretty lady," the man congratulated her, holding open the plastic bag half full of water for her to dump in her prize.

Lily stood to her feet while the booth proprietor tied the bag securely. A triumphant smile lit up her whole face. One of the little boys began to cry when the paper broke on his last scooper. She handed two of her remaining scoops to him and gave the other two to his little brother.

"Thank the nice lady you two," their mother coached them.

"Thank you," the little ones sang in unison.

The younger one smiled big, revealing he was missing his two front teeth. Lily chuckled, patting his head.

"You are as sweet as you look," Light said to her when she turned around. "Do you think you'll want children some day?"

"I don't know. If I find the right man...maybe." She glanced around for Hideki. An impending sense of doom snaked its way through her gut making her feel a tad queasy. "Where's Hideki?"

"He said he was going to buy a mask. He was also going to take water to Kiyomi."

"Why didn't you do that? Kiyomi is _your_ girlfriend, isn't she?" she inquired, her voice sounding harsher than she intended.

"He offered so why should I argue?" The logic was self-serving but understandable considering the source. "Why would I stop him when it gives me a chance to spend a little time with you?"

"Light, you shouldn't say such things," she scolded him in the most motherly manner.

"I told you I want to get to know you. As a matter of fact, I think I already do know you. Quite well," he added, reaching out toward her face.

"Don't do that." Lily stepped back to put herself beyond his reach. She reddened from a burst of heat ignited by disdain.

"You look hot." Before she could utter a less than ladylike response, he added, "I'll get you something cold."

Lily exhaled noisily after he walked away. Suddenly, her body felt lighter, her anger ebbing away. Light still possessed a powerful gravity like a black hole threatening to suck her in and tear her apart. Glancing at the wares of the nearby booths, she stepped forward to look at the handmade stoneware dishes at the next stall.

A hideous face dominated her line of vision. The face of a red demon with massive lower incisors that poked up like tusks on a wild boar and large black eyes loomed in front of her. The tip of the large bulbous nose of the oni pressed into hers. Her mouth opened in preparation to scream, but her brain kicked in before she could make a sound.

"Hello, Hideki," she murmured, regulating her breathing when her heart started beating again.

"Hi there," he returned, pulling the mask to the side to reveal his face.

Since they were so close together, he closed the short distance between them to kiss her - right on the lips. He made a habit of offending everyone, stranger or acquaintance, throwing propriety and social standards to the wind.

"You're a rebel," she muttered.

"Nah, I just do what I want to do. I wanted to kiss you. How's it going?"

"Oh, it's going."

"Keep up the good work. I'm off to find Kiyomi. I texted her, and she's giving me directions to her location. I love a good hunt."

"Hmmm, I bet," she hummed skeptically. Jealousy tugged at her heart, the muscles of her belly seizing.

"Those green contacts fit your emotions right now, but jealousy isn't your thing," he chided her, giving her another peck on the lips.

To be so clueless about his own emotional state, Hideki was uncannily perceptive of hers. He took the water filled plastic bag containing the fish from her. "I'll watch over your new friend for you. Gotta go."

Before she could examine the pottery, Light reappeared handing her a cup containing a mound of ice crystals piled high and painted red and blue with flavored syryps. Creamy beige condensed milk created a sweet, milky cap on the man made snow.

"Thank you," she mumbled around a mouthful of the shaved ice.

The suffocating summer heat made the simple sweet dessert taste absolutely sublime. She groaned in satisfaction after another spoonful, her eyes drifting closed to savor the sweetness coating her tongue.

Light cleared his throat. When Lily opened her eyes, she noticed the dark pink hue tinting his cheeks which made her blush as well. She must have been making quite a spectacle of herself enjoying her shaved ice so indecently in the middle of a crowd.

Strolling along, they glimpsed at the games and wares in the stalls they passed. The crowd began to thin as they neared the edge of the main thoroughfare. The lanterns also became fewer and further between, hanging from the limbs of the scattered trees along the concrete sidewalk that wound into the park away from the hustle and bustle of the festival.

Darkness and shadows filled the spaces between illumination creating an opportunity for Light to pull her off to the side and...she did not want to think about it. His attractiveness could not be denied. Judging by his new following of women, many women, he had become more alluring and beguiling. Lily would like to think she was immune to his enchantment, but she had already been under his spell once.

"Tell me how you caught that little fish so easily," Light said to bring her attention back to him and away from the thoughts in her head.

"Sometimes you have to be patient and gentle to capture what you want," she replied coolly.

She permitted the words to hang in the air between them, allowing him to interpret them any way he wanted.

They walked a little further without speaking. Apprehension started to spread through her body like a sickness, drawing her muscles into tight wires. She could feel he was waiting for the most dramatic moment to unleash hell on her.

"I was always patient and gentle with you," he said, allowing the back of his hand to graze hers.

Goosebumps raised over her entire body when the abject terror broke loose from her brain and slid down her back like an iceberg. The fear slammed in her lower back turning her knees to gelatin. She dropped her half eaten cup of shaved ice into the grass while miraculously staying on her feet.

"Before you say a word, I know it's you, Sachi," Light whispered directly into her ear. His hand slid across her back and around her waist to support her before she fell. "Don't play dumb with me. Don't do it anymore," he said in a menacing tone. "Stupid has never looked good on you, Sachiko Sugiyama."

Her mouth dropped open as if to speak, but there were no words. Instead, she panted for air like a dog who had been running. She had been running from her past, and here she was caught in its clutches once again. Her lungs still burned in their need for oxygen despite her heavy breathing. Everything around her started to swirl like a merry go round gone out of control. She was hyperventilating. This was the panic worthy development she had been dreading.

 _"I believe things are about to get extraordinarily interesting." Congratulations, Hideki Ryuga on your understatement of the year award_ , she thought sourly.

"When did you know?" she panted, closing her eyes to stop the world from spinning.

"I think I knew from the first time I saw you in the bakery. It took much longer for me to admit the truth to myself," he murmured. "I couldn't believe you had come back to me."

"I didn't come back to you," she corrected him, hearing the quiver in her voice. "I was following my dreams. Getting on with my life. Without you."

When his fingers glided across her chest slipping under the front of her yukata, her whole body stiffened. She bit her lower lip to hold back a scream for help. Her heart beat in her ears deafening her when his fingertips scraped over the sensitive skin between her breasts to clutch the square shaped diamond of her pendant.

"I know you still love me," he whispered, his lips teasingly scraping the outer curve of her ear. "Why do you still wear this if you no longer love me?"

"Because it was a beautiful gift from someone I loved. I couldn't throw away the necklace anymore than I could throw away the memories. It's only a part of my past. Like you," she added with an caustic sting, turning her head to look into his eyes.

His Bambi brown eyes gazed into hers. Warm and sweet like hot chocolate. He was looking at her the way he used to, when he might have sincerely loved her. Lily inhaled sharply, holding her breath when he lowered his head toward hers. Instead of kissing her, he pressed his forehead to hers.

Light pulled his hand and the necklace from inside her yukata. "This was the key. When you leaned over that little pool, concentrating so hard on those fish, I saw it. I knew it was you. Why didn't you tell me who you really are?"

"I didn't tell you who I was because I'm not that person any more. I'm Lily White now," she proclaimed, turning her head to face forward. She would not allow him to bridge the dangerously small gap between their mouths and kiss her. "I'm not that woman anymore."

"You are _still_ Sachi. You _are_ the woman I love," he ground out between his clenched teeth. He gripped her upper arms, his fingers digging into her skin with bruising strength when he jerked her around to face him.

"You were always kind and gentle. Until you were told no," she ground out through her clenched teeth. Her voice was strong though her body trembled.

"Please," he pleaded, loosening his pinching grip on her arms. He pulled her into him, wrapping his arms around her in a bear hug.

Lily grunted when he smashed her face against his firmly muscled chest simultaneously burying her nose in the folds of his yukata. Warm, wet droplets fell onto her forehead from his chin.

"You have no idea how many minutes...how many hours...I've spent thinking about you. I dreamed about you so many nights. I've missed you," he whispered, pulling her head back with both of his hands.

"Light, no!"

Ignoring her protest, he kissed her tenderly. Before Hideki, she might have wanted this ardent reunion. She wrenched her lips away from his, squirming in his bone crushing embrace to free her arms.

"NO!" she screamed, shoving him away from her. She pressed the back of her hand to her lips in an attempt to wipe away his kiss. "I'm with someone else."

"Do be serious," he chuckled hatefully. "Do you expect me to believe you're in an actual relationship with Ryuga? He's such a - "

Lily administered a bracing slap to Light's face before he could say another word. "You don't talk about him like that. You're supposed to be his friend, you asshole!"

Lily glared at him, her shoulders moving with each heaving breath to draw air into her body. Light's features went slack with astonishment. His mouth hung open, and his shoulders slumped. A well defined handprint in pink marred his otherwise flawless left cheek.

"I. Don't. Love. You," she said, enunciating each word slowly making each a declaration onto itself.

Light's kiss had frozen her to the core leaving her strangely disaffected. The kiss she had once craved, the arms where she found solace, presently aroused hostility. The man in whom she had formerly found love and affection left her feeling disgusted, disillusioned.

"Then why do you still wear my necklace?" he asked. "You kept it this whole time. You have to still feel something for me."

Lily fingered the necklace while sorting through her bewildering emotions. Her fingers closed around the pendant preparing to rip the chain from her neck.

Light only heard what he wanted to hear. His brain sorted her words, processing the statements coinciding with his desires and feelings then disposing of the rest.

Anger seeped into her otherwise cold and stiff body. Her brain frantically searched for her next move in the game.

Suddenly, Lily realized she was screwing with Hideki's game plan. The shrewd and unconventional detective had wanted her to text Light to feign interest in him, rekindling a connection between the two of them. She could fight it all she wanted, rebuffing Light's advances, but that would be setting them back two steps for every single step forward in the investigation. She was tossing a metaphorical monkey wrench in Hideki's carefully laid plans.

Lily released the necklace, and the breath she had been holding. Time to act. Lights. Camera. Action. She lowered her hands, lacing her fingers together. Her thumbs rotated around each other in an endless chase. She was going for the remorseful little girl look who had broken something precious that could not be put back together.

"Light," she sighed, keeping her eyes on her twiddling thumbs. "Maybe I do still feel something for you. I'm just scared, you know. I always have been."

"Give me a chance. Just one more chance. That's all I ask."

Lily raised her eyes to meet his when his fingers curled around her upper arms again.

"I'm not leaving Hideki. I - " she hesitated, questioning herself if the words she was about to say were true. She would say something she knew was true. "I care deeply about him. He holds my heart."

She breathed a sigh of relief when Light pulled his hands away, taking a step back from her.

"We can be friends, Light. _Friends_ ," she repeated emphatically. "I need you to be respectful of mine and Hideki's relationship. He's your friend after all. Keep that in mind."

"Okay. Whatever you say," he sighed impatiently, humoring her with his empty words. "We can start out as friends, but I won't promise it will stay that way. I'm going to fight for you. May the best man win."

 _Oh, but he already has, Light_ , she thought to herself.

"Lily? Light? Where are you?" Hideki called from the path.

The small, blinding light from Hideki's cell phone flashlight lit up the patch of ground behind Lily. She stepped back hoping the movement would catch his attention.

Light grabbed Lily pressing his mouth to hers in a violent kiss that was more of a show of dominance rather than affection. The pinpoint of light that chased away the shadows swung their way, bathing them in its white light.

When Light jumped away from her like a cheating lover caught having a tryst, Lily stood transfixed by shock and dismay. What did he just do? And Hideki had seen it! Guilt wriggled its way into her consciousness making her feel shamefully exposed as if she were standing stark naked in the park.

"Dammit, Light," she growled. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. Seeing you again just..." He glimpsed around as if searching for something.

His sanity perchance? He looked so unsettled and confused. What the hell was he doing? Surely he was not going to claim she had taken advantage of him if Hideki mentioned the kiss. It would be a juvenile move to break them up but an effective one. Resorting to childish tactics was not Light's style, but she did not put it past him to stoop so low. She would never in her wildest nightmares have imagined him to be a remorseless serial killer either. She no longer had any idea of what he was capable of doing.

"Why are you hiding in the dark?" Hideki questioned them, turning off the flashlight.

"N-nothing. W-we w-were j-just t-talking," she stuttered, barely able to spit out the words. Her eyes stung as if hot needles had been poked into them.

Tears of anger at Light and humiliation for the predicament she found herself in welled in her tear ducts. Lily had faith Hideki would see through the ploy. His voice had been toneless as usual, conveying neither anger nor hurt. He had to have known something like this could happen.

"Well, come here," Hideki said like he was calling a wayward puppy. "The fireworks will be starting soon, and we still need to buy the lanterns."

"Coming!" she called, casting a scathing glower at Light. "When did you become such an asshole? Or were you always one and I couldn't see it because I was in love with you?" she hissed at him, slapping his hand away when he tried to hold her elbow to guide her back to the path.

"Light!" Hideki yelled.

"Yeah. We're coming," Light answered. He held up his hand to block the beam of light that was shone directly into his eyes.

"So what was that all about?" Hideki asked when they joined him on the path.

"It was everything it looked like, Ryuga," Light confessed.

"Oh, my god," Lily muttered, covering her face with her hands.

"It was all my fault though. She reminded me of an old girlfriend, and I got a litle too caught up in my emotions. I kissed her, and I'm sorry," he lied brilliantly without the slightest bit of hesitation. "You are my friend after all. I have wronged you and Lily both. Please, forgive me."

Light bowed deeply in contrition. Hideki grabbed Light's chin pulling it up to see his face. Turning his flashlight back on, he carefully examined the handprint left by Lily that had deepened to a cherry red color.

"Well, the kiss was unwanted by at least one of you," he muttered, switching off the illumination and pulling his hand away like he had touched something slimy and gross. "I can't forgive you just yet. We will be going. Later, Light."

Hideki put his arm around Lily's shaking shoulders, leading her away from Light and back to the main area of the festival. "Are you all right?"

"I'm better now," she replied, laying her head on his shoulder. She sniffed to discourage the tears from falling.

"He knows?"

"He knows."

"And the kiss?" he asked in a shockingly placid tone.

"Meant nothing," she quickly replied in all sincerity.

Hideki remained silent. She chanced taking a look at his face. He did not appear affected at all. At times like this she found it difficult to believe he felt anything at all for her. However, by the way he held her close to him, pulling her body possessively into his, she could tell he was greatly bothered by the incident. He excelled at keeping his emotions securely locked away to prevent himself from acting irrationally.

"Thank you for showing up when you did."

"I told you I will protect you. I'm always watching you." He gazed at her with his huge owlish eyes as if to prove his point.

"God, Hideki, do you have to be so damn creepy?"

"We should get the lanterns for you parents," he reminded her.

Hand in hand, they strolled to the stall selling lanterns. Hideki bought two lanterns for her. One was a red rectangular lantern with the Kanji for love written in calligraphy on it. The other was white cube with hope stenciled on the paper. They carried the lit lanterns down to the little pier where people were sitting them in the water to float away to lead their loved ones to the after life. It was a nice thought considering her parents spirits had left this earth a long, long time ago.

"Love for the love my parents gave to me," Lily said, placing the lantern on the water and pushing it off to set sail with the others.

Hideki handed her the white one, giving her an encouraging smile which she gratefully returned. She should have bought one for strength in memory of his parents.

"Hope for their hope that I will continue on and live a good life filled with love and happiness." She set the lantern on the rippling stream, watching it float away.

Hideki put his hand on her shoulder while she continued to observe the lanterns drifting downstream. Lily put her hand on top of his, squeezing. The water lapped at the edge of the grass making a pleasant lulling sound. The muted voices of the other people around them mixed with the chirp of the crickets creating a musical sound.

Neither one of them said a word. Some of their best moments together were spent without words. A white light zoomed into the air signalling the beginning of the fireworks display.

"Do you want to join Light and Kiyomi for the fireworks?" Hideki asked, sliding his hand down her arm to take her hand.

"No," she responded, tugging back on his hand when he attempted to lead her away from the water's edge. "I want to stay here. With you. Just us."

"But there's people all - "

"Shut up, Hideki. Don't ruin it."

Lily was aware of the people milling around them, passing by to release their lanterns in memory of their loved ones. But when she was with him, the whole world faded into the background, leaving just the two of them in a special place of their own existing separately but together.


	28. A Perfect End to a not so Perfect Night

"Aren't you going to at least look at your phone?" Hideki asked when her notification for a missed call went off for the seventh time on their way back to the hotel.

"No," Lily answered curtly. She had stopped counting the text messages at twenty-two.

"What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it." Her stomach churned irritably and acid crawled up her throat.

Her phone beeped. Another text.

"I think he's really sorry for whatever he did," Hideki muttered irritably, expressing his annoyance in sarcasm.

Lily pulled away from him when tried to gather her into his arms. She put even more space between them by scooting closer to the door. "I'd rather you didn't do that until I get a shower. I feel...dirty."

"Was it really that bad? What did he do besides kiss you?"

"It's not what he did. It's who he is now. What he's become," she said, her voice low and sad. "He's not the man I remember him being. He's not the man I fell..." She inhaled a shaky breath. "He's not the man I knew."

"Are you sure you haven't romanticized him in your memories? People sometimes remember in color rather than black and white."

"That's a weird statement, but I get it. Kind of like the phrase looking at the world through rose colored glasses? We see things as we wish them to be, not how they really are? Or were," she murmured. She stared intently out of the window at nothing because the world was veiled in the darkness of night except for the golden sulfurous halos from the street lamps.

"Precisely," he rejoined. "You have no idea how much I enjoy talking to you. Most people don't know what I am talking about most of the time. If they cannot decipher it, I do not see the validity of explaining. But not only do you understand, you can answer in kind. "

"It's not their fault you're a Sphinx and speak in riddles," she chided him. "I'm a rare bird like you, Hideki."

"You're my kind of weird?"

"Precisely," she returned, using his term . She rotated her head in his direction to smile at him. "It's awesome that you are attracted to my large brains and curvaceous conversational skills."

"I'm so enamored with your sexy intellect. How often can a man say that and mean it, right?"

Lily laughed. It felt good to laugh. He made her feel good.

"Hey, do you want coffee and dessert? Maybe a little more stimulating conversation?" she asked with a wink.

"Oh, you know just the right words to say to me. How can I refuse an enticing offer like that?" he joked in return in a lecherous purr.

"You can't. But I have to get a shower first." Her skin felt crusty and ready to crack from the multiple layers of salt deposited over her entire body. It had been a hot night causing her to sweat profusely. The ick was made twice as worse from the extra added stress sweat induced by multiple waves of fear and embarrassment.

Once inside the suite, Lily made a beeline for her room. When her door was closed behind her, she started undressing, dropping clothes on her way to the bathroom. She turned the water spigot wide open for maximum pressure and all hot water. The bathroom filled with steam until she could no longer see her hand in front of her face. After sufficiently boiling herself in the shower, she exited into the mist. Wrapping one towel around her head, she used a second to dry her body which immediately became pointless because the steam redeposited dampness onto her skin.

Lily walked out of the bathroom to find Hideki sitting on her bed. Unfazed, too tired to freak out, she sat down on the bed beside him.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, pulling the towel off of her head.

"For what?" he inquired, genuinely bemused.

"I'm sorry if I've screwed things up," she apologized again. "This is harder than I thought it would be. I'm not sure what I'm doing or what I need to do."

"I can honestly say all of this is a first for me as well. The best I can do is make educated guesses on what I know about him and act accordingly. How did it make you feel?"

"You sound like a bored psychologist," she chuckled. The sound was hollow, devoid of genuine amusment. She got up from the bed, scrubbing the towel over her head to dry her hair. "How did what make me feel?"

"When he kissed you," he said bluntly. "It seemed to have a pretty profound effect on him."

"Yeah, I'm sure," she muttered, flinging the towel into the bathroom.

"You forgot your goldfish. Light has it. He wants to know if you want it."

"Dammit," she grumbled. She had forgotten about the damn fish. "Yes, I want it."

Obviously Hideki read the text messages. Hopefully he erased them too because she had no desire to read the numerous insincere apologies, the displacement of Light's guilt squarely onto her shoulders, and the willful ignorance of his own bad behavior.

"I can buy you another one. He might hold that one hostage. There's no telling what he might demand for ransom," he quipped, attempting to alleviate the suffocating atmosphere.

Lily did not respond because she was too preoccupied with her own thoughts. However, she was aware of his eyes. Hideki studied her in silence, watching her with those big eyes of his as she crossed the room to the dresser to retrieve a nightgown and underwear. He made no move to leave despite the fact she was about to dress.

"Want to watch?" she questioned him, freezing with one foot in the air poised to step into her panties.

"Will you let me?" he inquired hopefully.

"Get out," she commanded him, pointing to the door. "Give me five minutes."

"I'll meet you in the kitchen. I'm looking forward to coffee, dessert, and conversation."

Lily groaned, regretting her suggestion. Weariness settled on her shoulders like a perceptible burden. Her eyes skimmed longingly over the inviting marshmallowy poofiness of the white duvet and her plumped pillows. Her bed was calling to her. Sleep, sleep, sleep. She wanted desperately to answer the siren's call of slumber, but Hideki waited for her in the kitchen entertaining waking dreams of cake and syrupy coffee in his head.

Lily pulled on her underwear and dragged the light pink cotton nightgown over her head. Frills of thin lace bordered every edge of the garment and a line of small dark pink flowers were embroidered down the front. If he got turned on by looking at her with her soaking wet head and matronly nightgown then he had a fetish she did not want to know about.

The delicious scent of coffee filled her nose when she opened the door to her bedroom. She followed the aroma to the kitchen where Hideki had buried himself up to his waist in the refrigerator. A bowl of strawberries, a can of whipped cream, and a bottle of chocolate syrup sat on the kitchen island behind him. What the hell did he have in mind for dessert?

"What you doing?" she questioned him in a hesitant manner. Her eyes narrowed with suspicion when he emerged from the refrigerator with the remaining half of the chocolate mirror cake.

"I got tired of waiting," he replied.

"It was five minutes!" she exclaimed. "Wait a minute. If you can do all this for yourself, why do you make Watari and myself do everything?"

"I'm busy, not helpless," he clarified for her. "I need you two to help me with the mundane minutia of daily activities so I can concentrate on the case."

"Right, right, of course."

Picking her battles carefully, Lily decided to let this one go. She would not allow herself to be angered at this time because she was too damn tired. Besides, looking at the situation from his unique viewpoint, he was actually correct in his division of responsibilities.

Hideki poured the coffee into two plain white tea cups rimmed with gold. He placed the saucers on the countertop. In one he poured chocolate syrup. In the other, he squirted a pile of whipped cream. He dipped a strawberry in the pool of chocolate then dragged it through the fluffy mound of aerated cream.

"Want it?" he asked, holding out the delectable treat to her. He licked off the syrup that ran down his hand before it could stain the white cuff of his long sleeved t-shirt.

Lily opened her mouth so he could feed the strawberry to her. She bit into the juicy berry that almost filled her entire mouth. The whipped cream oozed out of the corners of her mouth and the syrup ran down her chin.

It was a delicious mess. She grabbed a kitchen towel to hold under her chin before the syrup could drip onto her nightgown. A giggle bubbled up her throat when Hideki ate a strawberry with the same result. After swiping at the remnants of chocolate and cream on her face, she did the same thing to him.

"Here. Open," he ordered her, holding a forkful of cake in front of her mouth.

"I can feed myself, you know," she snapped, opening her mouth despite her complaint.

"I know. But this is more fun," he said, inserting the cake into her gaping maw.

"I need more," she asserted, pointing to the strawberries.

"What are you going to give me?" He raised an eyebrow. He did not seem to care if she slapped his face or cursed at him so she did neither.

"My gratitude."

Hideki clicked his tongue in disappointment. He picked up a strawberry.

"Whipped cream only, please," she requested before he dipped it in the chocolate.

"Picky, picky," he murmured, heaping on the whipped cream. "You sure get spoiled fast."

"It's your fault," she countered, doing her best impression of a baby bird.

"I suppose it is. But I don't mind spoiling you."

Light had spoiled her a great deal as well. He had given her some of the sweetest, most endearing moments of her life. He had indulged her with food and gifts, kisses and hugs. His poetic words had made her shiver, tickling her ears and stroking her soul. Maybe on some plane of existence in his multi-faceted personality, he had sincerely loved her. Yet she had never been able to fully trust him. Perhaps she would never be able to trust anyone. Her current companion had warned her not to make the mistake of trusting him.

"Oh, it's all so confusing," she said suddenly.

"What is?" he asked, a bit bemused by her declaration.

"Life. Love. Everything," she mused aloud, picking up her coffee cup.

"It is confusing indeed," Hideki agreed with her, dropping sugar cubes into his cup.

"I'm not sure what to think about the kiss. Or Light as he is now," she said aloud, talking herself through her thoughts that were starting to pick up steam on their trip through her head. "I'm not sure about you either."

She concentrated on the man standing in front of her. At the moment he looked like a stork. Balanced on one leg, he rubbed the top of his foot along the back of the calf of his supporting leg.

"Well, Light will give you another chance to figure out your feelings for him. He was already asking to take you out to dinner to make things up to you," he announced.

"Unbelievable," she grumbled into her cup before finishing off the coffee.

"I want you to go out with him," he said, setting down the empty plate.

Lily sighed noisily but did not argue.

"You're not surprised. That's a good sign. Had you already guessed I would tell you to go?"

"Yes. You're not the only one who can establish patterns and predict outcomes. Isn't that what this is all about? It's like chess, isn't it? I've never played so I'm not sure," she admitted, refilling her cup. He was watching her with his usual expressionless gaze. "Strategy, prediction, guessing your opponent's next move before he makes it. Then you're ready to act, counterattack or run for safety."

"You make it sound like a war," he murmured.

"Isn't it? All's fair in love and war they say," she uttered into her cup.

"Is it?"

"No. It most certainly is not. Whoever said that was a douche bag."

"Poet John Lyly is the douche bag," he informed her. "The quote is from his novel _Euphues: The Anatomy of Wit_ published in 1579."

"That novel also includes the quote 'the rules of fair play _do not apply_ in love and war.'" She emphasized the key words. Her reference from the same obscure literary work caught him off guard. Getting one over on him in the intellectual arena was a rare feat of brain gymnastics, and pride swelled within her.

"Impressive. You never cease to amaze me. You are an incomparable woman, Sachiko Lily White Sugiyama. That's quite a mouthful," he said after saying all of her names in succession.

"I'm just Lily White," she corrected him.

"You should get some sleep," he advised her. "The tennis match is tomorrow."

"Oh, I forgot," she moaned, slapping the heel of her hand against her forehead. "I didn't make a lunch."

"It's all right. I anticipated that you might considering how busy you've been and the impending meeting with Light tonight. I asked Watari to prepare something."

"Oh, Watari's a good man. He's a life saver."

"He most certainly is."

"Good night, Hideki," Lily said, inclining toward him to kiss him on the cheek.

"Good night, Lily White," he rejoined.

At her bedroom door, she turned back to look at him. He was still standing at the island in the middle of the kitchen eating strawberries and chocolate cake.

"Hey, L, would you sleep with me tonight?" she queried, biting her lower lip nervously.

"I don't sleep much," he reminded her.

"Oh, okay." Disappointed and dejected, she opened her door to go in. Alone.

"But I can stay with you until you are asleep," he offered before she disappeared inside.

"Thanks. That would be great."

Lily went into her room, leaving the door open for him. She burrowed under the covers, searching for that elusive spot that offered the exact amount of softness she required to get comfortable. She was still squirming around to find her sweet spot when he slid into the bed behind her, fitting his body to hers and putting his arm around her waist to hold her still.

"You called me L. Why?"

"Because I needed to be close to you. The real you. Not who you're pretending to be."

"But aren't we still pretending?" he asked her.

Lily rolled over, looking him in the eye in the dim light filtering in from the kitchen. "Are we?"

Hideki kissed her on the lips. His kiss had the reverse effect of Prince Charming's kiss on Sleeping Beauty. She was out instantaneously.

"You're asleep already," he murmured in disbelief. He tried to slide out of the bed, but her arms cinched around his waist. "I'll stay a little bit longer."


	29. Balls: Big Ones and Small Ones

Light arrived at the tennis courts late. Grumpy from lack of sleep, annoyed by her lack of response to his calls and texts, he was ready to kill Hideki in a game of tennis. It would have to do. He had tried writing the man's name in the Death Note. It did not work. Just as he suspected, Hideki Ryuga was a fake name. Beating him at a tennis match in front of Lily might impart some degree of satisfaction.

The unmistakable thwack and pop of tennis racquets making contact with fuzzy yellow tennis balls could be heard scattered among the grunts of effort from the players. The courts were full of casual players gathered for friendly games or their morning exercise.

 _Where the hell are they?_ , Light wondered, stomping down the cement steps built into the side of the hill leading down to the courts. The tennis courts were located at the bottom of the valley between two grass covered knolls.

"That's set point!" Lily yelled, her voice carrying over all of the other noise.

The muscles of Light's belly clenched in response to hearing her voice. He paused on the stone stairs, searching for her amid the moving bodies on the green paved court. His eyes spotted her in the last court. Lily was wearing a short white pleated tennis skirt and a sleeveless white v-neck shirt. The sweat on her skin made her shine in the sunlight like a bronze goddess. Her present match partner and his future opponent was wearing his usual attire of jeans and a white t-shirt. At least Ryuga had switched to short sleeves to accommodate for the hot weather. Sweat poured down his face, gluing chunks of his disheveled black hair to his forehead and cheeks.

"Seriously?" Light grumbled.

 _Stupid, stupid move,_ Light thought to himself. Already playing a game would tire the man out, putting him at a disadvantage. This served to agitate Light because he wanted to beat Ryuga when he was at his best. No matter. A win is a win.

"Hey," Kiyomi greeted Light, appearing in front of him. "About time you got here."

"Hey," he returned, leaning down to kiss her on the lips. He summarily ignored her addressing his lateness. He did not have to answer to her. His attention was elsewhere, watching the brunette on the far court meeting her partner for an after game congratulatory hug.

"Are you sure she's Ryuga's girlfriend?" Kiyomi asked, eyeing the woman up and down with critical, envious eyes.

Lily dried the sweat from Ryuga's face with a small white towel, smiling at him then laughing at something he said. They were too cute. Too perfect.

"She sure appears to be his girlfriend," Light mumbled irritably.

"What's wrong with you? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?" Kiyomi retorted, injecting a dose of acid into the words.

 _Yeah. And alone. Goddammit.,_ he bitched internally. Out loud he said, "I didn't sleep much last night, and I missed my alarm."

"That's not like you. Is there something going on?" she inquired, expressing suspicion more than concern. Her eyes followed his line of sight back to the woman walking hand in hand with her boyfriend off of the court. "God, they're almost sickening they're so sweet."

"Yeah," he agreed, taking her by the hand. He did feel quite sick at his stomach, but it was time to play the game - more games than tennis.

"It almost seems like they're playacting," she noted, watching Lily take a bottle of water out of the cooler.

"Why do you say that?"

"I mean, look at her," she said, shrugging her shoulders.

Kiyomi folded her arms in front of her chest, scrutinizing the woman rising up on her tiptoes to give her supposed boyfriend a chaste kiss on the cheek. Her leg muscles flexed and hardened into defined lines along her calves and thighs. She looked every bit the part of a ballet dancer. Not so much the part of Hideki's significant other. Ryuga suddenly turned his face, catching her lips for a kiss. She pulled away from the sneak attack kiss, laughing. Lily slapped him playfully on the chest, turning bright red. Her face disappeared into his bushy black hair when she leaned forward to whisper something in his ear.

"She's beautiful. Poised. Graceful. Well-mannered," Kiyomi said.

"And he's just...not," Light finished for her.

"They say opposites attract," she added.

"Opposites are one thing. But this guy is from another planet," Light said, plastering a smile on his face and waving back when Lily waved at him.

Time to smash Ryuga into the court. He shifted the bag holding his racquet and other gear on his shoulder.

"Morning!" Lily greeted them cheerfully when they approached.

"Morning. Sorry I'm late," Light apologized. He shook hands with Hideki. "You ready?"

"Waiting on you," Hideki returned, finishing off his bottle of water.

"So what do I get if I win?" He refrained from glancing at Lily. She was not his priority today. He was after something else.

"You can ask me anything. I'll tell you anything you want to know."

"Works for me. Let's do this," Light returned, happily taking up the challenge.

He was more determined to win than ever. There was a strategic piece of information he wanted. Let the battle begin.

~~~\\\/~~~

Lily sat down on the hill, heaving a deep sigh of relief. She took another bottle of water from the cooler Kiyomi had brought. She noted the haughty tilt of the woman's head and the way she stared directly at the two men on the court. Casting a sidelong glimpse at the sullen, positively sulky woman, she realized she was being shunned.

Lily had no desire to make idle conversation with the To Oh Beauty Queen anyway. Bored indifference nullified the tension wafting off of her in palpable waves. She simply did not care. She did not want to be Kiyomi's friend. She did not want to steal away Kiyomi's boyfriend. As if that would be a difficult task.

It is impossible to hold on to someone who does not want to be held. To act like such a fine upstanding citizen, Light had a rebellious streak a mile wide. He showed it in subtle ways like having a dozen girlfriends but attempting to seduce his best friend's girlfriend from under his nose. The act of defiance at the absolute top of the list was slapping God in the face by taking it upon himself to issue supreme divine judgment and eternal punishment. It took a lot of balls to rebel against God and let Him know in no uncertain terms the job he was doing was not good enough.

Speaking of balls, Lily focused her attention on the game as Hideki prepared to serve the ball. The fuzzy yellow sphere hit the green painted court in front of Light's feet and bounced between his legs. He missed. She swore she saw something move as if to jump out of the way of the ball before it slammed into the chain link fence surrounding the court. Rather than seeing an actual object, it was more like a disturbance in the air; a shimmer, like heat waves rising from the black topped roads in the summer heat. The heat must be getting to her, making her see things. Lily shook her head and took a lengthy sip from her water bottle. She hoped Hideki had drank enough to prevent dehydration.

"Fifteen love," Hideki proclaimed.

"Hey, Ryuga, you don't mess around," Light countered good naturedly, a smile on his face.

"He who strikes first wins," he rejoined.

A crowd of spectators started to gather around the perimeter of the court. The other players abandoned their matches to watch the two men locked in a furious competition. Grunts and snarls like those of wild animals echoed through the air amid the popping sound of the ball coming into contact with a racquet or the court. With powerful smashes and punishing back hands, these two combatants were acting as if this tennis game was a life or death battle. In a way, it was.

"Hey, do you know who that is?" a girl asked the female student standing next to her. Without waiting for an answer, she gushed excitedly, "That's Light Yagami. He was the Junior High Champion at his school for two years straight."

"Then during the award ceremony, he announced he was hanging up his racquet and hasn't played since," added the other girl helpfully. "Apparently, he hasn't lost his touch."

"Ah, he's so handsome," cooed a third girl. "Go, Yagami!"

"Hmmm, spoken like a true fan-girl," Lily remarked upon overhearing the conversation. Without looking at Kiyomi, she said, "Seems your boyfriend has quite the fan-girl following."

"You have no idea," Kiyomi muttered, snatching up shoots of grass and tossing them into the nonexistent breeze.

"You can do it, Ryuga!" cheered a female from the other side of the court.

Lily giggled. At least Hideki had one other fan besides her.

There was a whole lot more going on here than any of these people knew. She would hate to be in either Hideki or Light's heads right now because it would be an awfully noisy place. Both of them would be busy trying to figure out what the other was thinking. Gauging one another's every move, assessing the other's emotional state. Reasoning, conjecturing, predicting.

It gave her a headache considering what must be going through their analytical brains.

~~~\\\/~~~

 _He's trying to trap me. I know it,_ Light thought, contacting the ball with his racquet and sending it hurtling back at Ryuga.

An image of Lily, the bait, formed in his mind. He was on to Hideki's game and willing to play. Smacking the ball back into Hideki's court, he squatted down to prepare for the return. He played to win. Always.

The time had come to abandon defense, simply protecting his identity as Kira by using passive tactics such as militant denial and subtle misdirection. The moment to attack had arrived. A powerful backhand hit sent the ball flying past Ryuga, almost hitting him. It touched the back corner of the square before bouncing out. He scored bringing his score for this set to forty points and putting him in the lead. He was about to win.

Getting what he wanted required an all out, head on assault. To rid himself of the annoying obstacle named Hideki Ryuga or L or whatever he wanted to call himself, and to reclaim Lily, he needed to employ more aggressive tactics. No more hints and allegations. Light emitted a loud grunt through gritted teeth, delivering a forceful forehand hit to send the ball careening back into Hideki's court who dove for the ball but missed.

"Set! Yagami wins!" bellowed the man who had taken it upon himself to be the official of the game.

It was over. Light bent over, placing his hands on his knees. He open mouth panted, satisfied with his victory. Ryuga had put up quite the fight despite having already played a previous game. Perhaps if he had gotten more sleep last night, if she had not been a constant distraction plaguing his thoughts, he would not have had to put forth so much energy to win.

"Congratulations," Lily said, offering him a cold bottle of water.

"Thank you," he returned breathlessly, taking the bottle from her.

"You played really well. I heard you were a junior champion too. You and Hideki have so many things in common."

 _Lots of things_ , he thought to himself, staring at her while he drank. He despised being compared to Hideki - especially by her.

"I've always been a champion. No matter what game I'm playing." He smiled upon seeing disgust flit across her face. Sounding like a pompous jerk had never bothered him especially when there was truth to the words.

"You won't always get what you want, Light." She glared at him through angry slits.

"We'll see about that."

"Great game, Yagami," Ryuga congratulated him. "About that wager, did you want to make good on that now or later?"

"Now is as good a time as any for a little chat between friends. Lily, do you mind?" Light asked.

Lily glanced between the two of them, her forehead folding like an accordion into worry lines. Her lips shifted downward into a frown when she gazed at Hideki questioningly.

Light did not miss the wordless but important communication between them: the barely perceptible nod Ryuga gave her and the shake of her head in return. They shared more than a casual connection if they could speak to each other with a look. That pissed him off, sending him crashing to earth from his adrenaline high.

"Kiyomi left before the game was over. I'll leave the food for the two of you. I've lost my appetite anyway," she said, throwing a fiery glower at Light before turning to walk away.

Light's eyes skimmed over her legs displayed nicely by her cute little tennis outfit. Watching her walk away was not a totally unpleasant event.

"Shall we?" Hideki suggested, pointing to the blanket where their lunch had already been put out for them.

Light waited until they were situated and sufficiently hydrated before talking.

"Are you L?" he inquired bluntly.

Ryuga did not act surprised by the question. There was absolutely no change in his facial expression. Not a hint of emotion registered in his bottomless black pits of eyes.

"Yes," Ryuga confirmed. "But you already knew that. Didn't you?"

"L? Your name is L? A single letter?" Light questioned him over and over in disbelief.

"Yes," L affirmed patiently, adding a nod.

Light stared at him. There had to be a last name, but L was not sharing it. DAMMIT! L was one step ahead as usual.

His eyes narrowed as he continued to study the other man's face. He noted the circles under L's eyes were not quite as dark and no longer bruise like, as if he had gotten a good night's sleep for the first time in forever.

"Do you think I'm Kira?" Light rushed on, returning the unflinching gaze.

"Yes," came the candid reply. "I believe there's a one percent chance you're Kira."

"Only one percent?" He mulled it over in his head what that might mean.

 _One percent? As long as he suspects me, that prevents me from gaining access to the information he has. I need to know what evidence, if any, he has against me. I also won't be able to offer any input on the case in order to mislead him. He's got me right where he wants me and there's nothing I can do about it,_ Light thought, watching the man sitting across from him casually eating a chocolate chip cookie.

"You believe there's such a infinitesimal chance I'm Kira?"

"Yes. With that being said, once I've verified that you are not Kira, I'd like to have your assistance with my investigation. You are extremely intelligent and perceptive with superior deductive skills. I could use someone like you on this case."

 _How noble of you to request my help. One of these days, L, you will be out of my way. I will be free to be Kira, to rid this rotting world of the human disease eating away at it. I will have Lily by my side as I create a whole new and better world._

Light stared at the man in front of him with vanilla cake crumbs hanging from his lips and white icing smeared on his cheek. He did not understand how she could have chosen this man over him. There was no logic behind her foolish choice. He would have to make her understand the error of her ways. He sighed loudly. Perhaps she was not fit to be with him. But no. This is what she, and the man sitting there shoving cake into his vacuous face, wanted him to think. They wanted him to give up, to leave her alone, and to walk away. He would not abandon her or his godhood. He would have it all. He would be the ultimate winner.

"So, Ryuga, I assume you want me to keep calling you that," Light interjected respectfully. He received a nod of affirmation. "Did Lily mention that I want to take her out to dinner?"

"Yes. She did. I gave her my permission," he said calmly, his monotone voice never changing pitch or volume.

 _Your permission?,_ Light's brain screamed. _Since when did she need any man's permission to do anything?_

"However, she suggested brunch tomorrow morning instead of dinner. She said dinner hinted at something romantic. Too romantic for just friends," he explained, smiling broadly.

 _Smug bastard,_ Light seethed internally but maintained the friendly grin on his face by sheer will.

"All right. I'll text her with a time and place tonight," Light said.

"She's looking forward to getting to know you better."

 _I bet,_ Light growled like a rabid dog inwardly _. All right, L. I'll keep playing your game._

"Same here. Thank you for being such an understanding boyfriend." He almost choked on the word. "She sure is lucky to have someone like you."

"Yes, she is," Hideki agreed. With a placid smile on his lips, he added,"Just remember, I will protect her at all costs. From _anyone_ who thinks they might want to hurt her."

 _Was that a threat?_


	30. Listen Closely

Hideki had been gone for hours. He did not respond to her texts. She had even gotten desperate and texted Light. He did not reply either. Lack of communication from both of them only increased her anxiety exponentially.

Lily had taken a shower after arriving back at the suite. She attempted to take a nap to pass the time. All she could think about was what might be happening between Light and Hideki. Had they gotten into a physical altercation? Was L injured and alone? Did Light know L's real name? Had Light brought the notebook with him in the bag with his tennis gear? Was L lying dead somewhere? Giving up on being able to escape her unnerving musings through sleep, she went to the kitchen to bake, her favorite form of relaxation therapy. Two loaves of wheat bread, a cherry pie, a lemon pound cake, and three dozen iced sugar cookies later, she was hot and sweaty - and nauseated from persistent worry.

Too cool off, Lily swam laps, counting in her head the entire time to occupy her mind. She swam until her muscles cramped, and there were too many digits to keep up with the numbers. She retired to the hot tub to loosen up the knots in her muscles. At last she was able to find sweet repose, but unfortunately nearly drowned when her nose slipped under the water, and she panicked. Brilliant.

Lily had been pacing the balcony for so long she expected to see a path worn on the stone floor. She wrung her hands, glimpsing at the setting sun. Beside herself with worry, she still could not calm her rattled nerves.

The caw of a crow went unnoticed until the large black bird lit on the black dusted wrought iron railing where she had propped her elbows. The bird cocked his head and appeared to stare at her with recognition. Could it be him?

Lily cautiously extended her hand toward the bird. The creature stepped away, hopping along the round bar to retreat from her but did not take flight. She held her hand still, allowing him to approach her. He stared at her relaxed, slightly curled fingers, turning his glossy head this way and that way. He moved closer. When he pressed the smooth iridescent feathers on his head against the back of her fingers, she stroked him gently.

"I've missed you," she said aloud, not caring if it was actually Itachi Okada or just a plain old crow. She felt the need to confide her troublesome emotions in order to relieve the pressure in her chest and head. The bird certainly would not be sharing any secrets with anyone. "I'm worried."

Lily scoffed at her gross understatement. "I'm scared. Terrified really. For L. I don't want Light to hurt him. I don't want him to write L's name in that damn notebook."

 _Don't worry. He won't. I won't let him,_ a voice not her own, spoke inside her head.

"It is you," she sighed, backing away to make room when the bird flitted down from the railing to land on the surface of the patio. Her body trembled in anticipation, observing a fantastical transformation as the overly large crow shape shifted into a handsome man with black wings. Lunging forward, she flung her arms around his waist for a powerful embrace, sobbing tears of joy and sadness simultaneously.

"I've missed you too," he murmured, nuzzling his nose into her hair. He pulled her back from him, giving her a thorough examination with his piercing black eyes. "Has anything bad happened?"

"Not yet. Something odd did happen earlier today," she mumbled thoughtfully. "I would have sworn I saw something move behind Light at the tennis court. The air was...wavy. Moving like there was something there. But I couldn't see anything. Or maybe it was more of a feeling instead of a presence. I don't know. It's hard to explain."

"It may have been the Shinigami. The one who gave Light the notebook," he clarified.

"The death clown from my dream?" she asked. Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion, and she blushed when he laughed uproariousr.

"I suppose that's one way to describe Ryuk," Itachi chuckled. "Actually a pretty accurate way to describe him."

The smile fell from his face. The trouble the insufferable Ryuk had stirred up by giving Light Yagami the Death Note was anything but funny. Itachi Okada looked downright angry. The muscles in his jaw worked under his skin, and his teeth gnashed together so fiercely she could hear them grinding together.

"What's wrong?" she inquired, her anxiety level rising.

She had never seen him look like this, openly displaying an intense hatred. He was ugly and scary. Words she never imagined could describe him.

"Lily, I want you to think very carefully before you answer my question. I can give you the ability to see things not of this world. Specifically the Shinigami attached to the notebook. And Light Yagami. Do you want this power?"

The muscles of her chest squeezed her lungs and heart making it difficult to breath. A hot flash caused a frigid sweat to break through the skin under her nose and across her forehead. The power see things not of this world. She would be able to see Light's Shinigami. She really did not want to see that creature from her nightmare again and definitely not in person, so to speak. However, if she knew when the Shinigami was present, that could enable her to protect L. If she kept her ability hidden from Light, she would be able to see and hear things that would help her prove Light's guilt.

"I need an answer," Crow said in a low voice as not to startle her out of her obvious internal debate.

"Yes. Yes, I want to be able to see him," she answered with conviction.

"Close your eyes," he instructed her, taking her face between his hands. He carefully kissed one eyelid, then the other.

"That's it?" She slowly opened her eyes to look up at him.

"That's it," he confirmed. "You won't feel anything or notice any physical changes. Just be prepared for a shocking revelation the next time you're around Light. If Ryuk is there, you will see him."

 _I should be accustomed to shocking revelations by now_ , she thought to herself. _But how does one ever get used to these kinds of things?_

"O-okay," she stammered, her jagged nerves causing her to visibly shake. She was not looking forward to suddenly coming face to face with the Shinigami. Only by some miracle would she hold herself together when it happens.

"Lily?" L called out for her from the doorway leading onto the balcony.

"I'll visit again soon," Itachi Okada promised, disappearing in an instant.

No flashes of light. No puffs of smoke. He was just gone as if he had never been there at all. A black feather floated down from the air to land at her feet. She stooped down swiftly to scoop it up into her hands. The black feather was short, fluffy, and downy soft. She shoved it in the pocket of her white eyelet lace sundress.

"I'm here!" Lily called to him stepping from the secluded area of the balcony. The small square of isolated green space tucked in the back corner was further hidden by tall bushes and numerous big leafy plants as if a jungle were growing on the rooftop hideaway.

"What were you doing back there?" Hideki inquired when she came to stand in front of him.

"Just thinking. I'm so glad you're home," she sniffled, unable to contain her tears of relief.

"What's wrong?" he asked, concern causing his voice to rise slightly.

He stroked her hair that was still damp from her near death experience in the hot tub. Although that event had been scary, and could be deemed noteworthy enough to tell him, she was definitely not going to say anything about that.

"I was worried about you," she breathed.

"I told Light who I am. Basically all I did was confirm his suspicions I'm L. Like I did with you." He smiled at her after unceremoniously dropping the information bomb on her.

"What?" Her arms dropped from around him to hang loosely at her sides. Terror seized her spine in its iron hard grip and threatened to snap it in two.

"I suppose it was time for both of us to reveal our true identities," he answered casually with a nonchalant shrug.

"But why? Why would you do that? He can - " She almost divulged a secret that she had no way to prove. L would think she was totally insane if she said, 'He can kill you now by writing down your name.'

"The investigation has grown stagnant. I had to give things a push," he expounded on his line of reasoning.

"I thought that's what I was here for. To give Light a little nudge. To spur him into action, to do something... anything...to provide at least one small clue for you to work with. All you had to do was be patient."

"I need to make something happen. To stop the murders. I've spoken to my team of detectives with the NPA. They are starting to doubt my competence because the public is growing more impatient with them. The general public wants answers. They want to know they're safe. I need proof, significant proof, to work with if I'm going to pursue Light Yagami as a suspect."

"You don't think Light is Kira anymore...do you?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest and backing away from him a step.

"It's not that. I hold firm in that belief. I told him otherwise to gain his trust."

"Do you think he would trust you after learning that you had been lying to him about your identity as the detective who's going to nail his ass to the wall? Oh, come on, L," she snorted derisively, her annoyance with him growing. She turned her back to him to avoid looking at him.

He was too smart to do something this dumb. She was finding it impossible to follow the line of reasoning behind his decision, and he put forth no explanation. She believed he actually was beginning to doubt Light's guilt because he had grown too fond of the man he called his best friend. Who wants to believe their best friend, their only friend, in the world is an infamous mass murderer? She had not wanted to believe Light, her boyfriend, could be a killer either.

Light never trusts anyone. He puts himself, his interests, and his ambitions first - above everyone's - always. There was no way he was going to trust anything: his heart, his body, his career, his money, not one aspect of his life, to someone else. He needed that control. Light was the god of his own destiny, the maker of his own fate.

"Light is Kira, L. Please, don't trust him and let your guard down," she pleaded with him.

"I don't have to argue with you about this. You work for me. You answer to me and do what I tell you to do," L proclaimed, his voice rising in volume, his words sharp as daggers.

Lily whirled around to gape at him in astonishment.

"Fucking hell, are we really getting into an argument because of Light?" she asked.

"No. I don't argue."

"Fine," she muttered, stomping past him to go into the suite.

"Fine. What do you mean fine?" he asked, following her into the kitchen.

"I mean I'll get you the proof you need," she returned, opening and slamming cabinet doors to vent her anger while snatching out the elements to make coffee. "I work for you right? It's time for me to get busy and do my job."

"What exactly are you planning to do?"

Lily ignored him, pouring water into the basin on the drip coffee maker. She pressed a filter into the basket, allowing his question to hang in the air unanswered. After spooning in the grounds, closing the lid, and pressing the start button, she moved on to the process of retrieving cups and saucers and plates for sweets.

"Tell me your plan," L demanded, grabbing her arm to rotate her body to face him.

"I don't know. I don't have any idea what I'm going to do yet," she confessed, reluctantly meeting his intense gaze. "What I do know is, I can't continue to be afraid of Light. I'm here to seduce him, upset him, make him mess up. Well, so far, he's the one who has been doing those things to me."

Lily kissed him: a forceful, smothering kiss right on the mouth. Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes but did not fall. For a long moment, she stared at him, searching for the correct words to say.

"L, I don't want anything to happen to you. You promised to protect me. I want do the same for you." She took a deep breath to steady her voice before speaking her next words. She wanted him to listen, really listen, not just humor her by pretending to take her seriously. "I'm not as smart as you, but I know a few things about Light. Don't trust him. Don't let go of your conviction that he's Kira. If you do, he will kill you."


	31. Three Important Words

Lily slept alone. Well, she tossed and turned alone. Around one in the morning after waking from a dreamless, fitful hour long nap, she went to the kitchen for a bottle of water. She twisted off the top and stood at the counter drinking it until she drained the bottle. Her eyes strayed across the way to see L sitting at his desk, pecking away at his keyboard. Although he was just across the suite, within earshot of her voice, he might as well have been a million miles away. And she did not want to talk to him anyway.

Turning on her heel, Lily snatched open the refrigerator door to take out the homemade chocolates. She had spent the afternoon completing the time and attention consuming task to avoid L. Half way through the tedious, detailed process she became convinced the only person she was punishing was herself. L loved both silence and candy so her chocolate making silent treatment was actually working in his favor.

Lily still had not come up with a single idea much less a step by step process that could be construed as a real plan to deal with the problem of Light. Her mind had ran through dozens of scenarios and far too many of them ended up with the two of them in a compromising position. Sighing, still desperately trying to formulate a plan of attack the impending brunch date, she closed the door.

"Lily," L said calmly.

Suddenly finding herself almost face to face with him scared the hell out of her.

"Jesus Christ," she gasped, pressing her hand over her racing heart. Somehow she managed to hold onto the plate full of chocolates. A little dizzy from her mild myocardial infarction, she set the plate on the counter in case she fainted.

"Are you all right?" he inquired as if he was not responsible for scaring the crap out of her.

"Oh, I'm great," she snapped. Noticing that he was staring at the chocolates, she pushed the plate toward him. "I made these for you."

"Oh, you shouldn't have," L mumbled, taking a half sphere shaped chocolate filled with homemade caramel.

"Yeah, I know," she agreed. "But I like you. Enjoy."

"Why are you so upset?" He punctured a chocolate with his finger to determine what sweet treat she had hidden inside. Chocolate genache. Who doesn't like chocolate inside of chocolate?

"I'm worried about you. You shouldn't have told Light your real name." She sighed, leaning against the counter. "I guess we're both taking risks with our lives right now."

"So have you come up with a plan?" he asked.

"No, I haven't. I'm just going to wing it. Whatever happens, happens," she muttered, eating a chocolate heart filled with strawberry preserves.

"Wing it? Are you sure improvising is a good idea?" he queried, picking up a solid milk chocolate square.

"Well, since this isn't comedy hour and is an actual matter of life or death, I think it's a horrible idea," she admitted, avoiding his penetrating dark eyes. "But I've got nothing else. I'm not a genius like you and Light."

"You seem to do pretty well with your quick wit and common sense."

"Was that a compliment?" She brightened at the words that could be considered praise.

"It's your lack of emotional control that will not allow you to be successful," he stated flatly.

"There it is," she sighed. Releasing a beleaguered groan, she deflated physically to mirror her emotional state. Leaning over the counter, she lay her head on her folded arms.

"Your thoughts are scattered because your anxiety and worry are running rampant. You're also allowing your past feelings for Light cloud your judgment in the present. Your temper makes you act irrationally, saying things - "

"Okay!" she exclaimed, tapping her palm on the counter top to signal her surrender. He reminded her of Ms. Fujita when she would go 'full mom' during her sessions. "I get it. I understand. You're right."

"You really should get some sleep. You need to be at your best tomorrow to handle Light," he said, patting her head as if she were a sad puppy.

"Gee, Poindexter, you think?" she retorted acidly.

"You know, Lily, I really don't understand all of these strange names you call me," he returned sounding genuinely hurt. "Well, actually, I do understand the Sherlock one. I'm a detective, he was a detective. My powers of deduction are on par with his."

"L, stop," she moaned, raising her head to look at him.

"What did I say wrong?" He blinked at her like a blameless child.

"Nothing. Everything you said was right."

"I want you to know that whatever you do to handle this, no matter what happens, I won't be angry with you." His eyes dropped from hers and refused to come back. Had he ran possibilities through his head, realizing her encounters with Light could very well end in intimate contact? Or was he more concerned with her efforts yielding no results whatsoever?

"Uhm, okay." She did not ask for an explanation. "Well, I'm going to try to get some sleep."

Lily took a step past him but was stopped when L captured her wrist. Neither one of them looked at the other, each one focusing on the floor under their bare feet.

"You can stay with me if you like," he said, his voice almost a whisper.

"I-I don't feel like t-talking," she stammered.

"We don't have to talk. I like it when you're near me. You being close to me is enough."

"L," she breathed, inserting herself between his body and the island. Her fingers buried themselves in his hair.

 _Oh, it is soft! So soft. Oh, my god,_ she thought to herself while running her fingers through his downy soft locks. "Oh, my god. Your hair is fantastic."

L kissed her on the forehead while she continued to paw his hair. His lips pressed gentle pecks to each of her cheeks. When his lips touched hers, her hands meandered down his cheeks and neck, then across his chest.

Lily loved kissing him. There was an innocent eagerness in his kiss. He displayed a hesitancy when her lips parted, but only for a brief moment. The tip of his tongue tentatively touched her bottom lip. When her tongue met his, he grew bolder and pushed his tongue a little further into her mouth.

L's mouth still tasted like the chocolate he had eaten. The sweet flavor enticed her to suck on his tongue lightly until a guttural groan rose in his throat. The sound he made stimulated her, heating her deep inside. Lily moaned into his mouth, gripping his hips. Her fingers curled into the material of his shirt. When he raised his mouth from hers, she took the opportunity to jerk his shirt over his head.

His hair fluffed up and fluttered around his face, stirred by the movement of his shirt. Then it settled back down into his typical meaningfully messy style. She laughed. Pressing her open palm to his cheek, she met his gaze that was a mixture of excitement and confusion all at once.

"I love your hair. It definitely has a mind of it's own," she chuckled, mussing it a little with her other hand.

Her eyes dropped to his mouth. His lips were a dark pink color and a little swollen from their fervent kiss giving him a sexy pout. Using the pad of her thumb, she traced his lips.

"I love your kisses," she said, inclining her head to his for another quick kiss. She could reach him with ease since he was face to face with her in his patent stoop shouldered stance.

"What else do you love about me?" he asked, curious on more than an intellectual level. His fingers played across her collarbones bared by the tiny spaghetti straps of her nightgown.

Lily's eyes held his that had become half lidded with desire instead of their normal wide open state. "I love your eyes. Because they see everything."

Her line of sight moved down to where her hand lay on his bare chest. A stark contrast of golden brown on a backdrop of flawless white. His skin was so smooth, warm and alive under her palm. That is exactly how she wanted to keep him - alive. She moved closer to him which forced him to stand up a little straighter.

L was rail thin as she had suspected; so thin his ribs etched ridges through the skin on his sides. Smooth, undefined muscle composed a firm foundation under his delicate milky skin which her fingers explored while her eyes greedily drank in the sight of his torso. The only thing keeping his loose jeans on his body were his prominent hip bones. Her eyes followed the delightful V cut into his hips through a combination of pelvic bones and muscle striations. Before her eyes reached the bottom of the v, the lines disappeared under the gaping waistband of his jeans.

"I love your beautiful ivory skin." Her eyes returned to his face, then to his fluffy hair, which she carefully combed using her fingers to keep from tangling it. "I love your crazy black hair."

"You love a lot of things about me," he commented, pulling her close. He held her against his deceptively muscular body allowing her to feel more of his hidden muscles.

"I do, don't I?" Her fingers followed the straight lines of his sides, making him gasp and pull away. Ticklish huh? She did not expect that. He was full of all sorts of wonderful surprises. "L, have you ever - OH!"

Lily was caught off guard when he cupped her behind with his big hands and lifted her from the floor. Automatically her arms wound around his shoulders and her legs around his waist. Her mouth sought his for a passionate kiss. A grunt was muffled between their mouths when he plopped her down on the cold, unforgiving surface of the kitchen island.

If he had never had sex before, L sure did catch on fast with the right lead. His hands pushed under the bottom hem of her nightgown. His fingers spread wide, sliding up her thighs. After his fingers hooked over the waist of her underwear, she lifted her behind so he could strip them off.

Lily wanted this. She wanted him. She wanted L to be the first man to make love to her. Although not a virgin, love had absolutely nothing to do with the sex forced upon her by her uncle. This situation was so different. L was different and so were her feelings for him.

"L, are you sure we should do this?" she asked, assisting him with unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans.

"I'm one hundred percent sure," he said, pausing briefly to look into her eyes. "What else do you love about me?"

"Oh, I love the best, most important, thing of all," she murmured, tears filling her eyes. "You. L, I love you."

Lily held her breath when he pushed into her slowly. He treated her with care, using gentle hands and tender movements, not wanting to hurt her or frighten her. Her eyes remained on his for the duration of his gradual entry.

"Are you all right?" L asked, brushing his fingers through her hair.

Lily nodded, holding her lower lip between her teeth. Her entire body trembled, anticipating him moving inside of her again. When he did pull his hips backwards, she hugged him close to her wanting to feel his heart beating against hers.

"Don't stop. I'm all right. I want this," she whispered in his ear, encouraging him to keep going.

This was how a first time should be. Uncomfortable and a little scary due to the newness of the experience, the awkwardness of acquainting oneself with their lover's body. She felt safe in his arms, comforted by his gentleness. He kissed away her tears. His hands caressed and stroked, bringing her pleasure she had never known - especially with sex. The only feelings she had ever known to come with sex was pain and terror, shame and anger. She felt none of those things with him.

"Lily, I'm glad you love me," he whispered to her, panting lightly into her ear.

The sound of him taking pleasure in her body excited her. She cried out when the heated pressure in her lower region surged, ebbing and flowing with each of his thrusts.

"Oh, L," she murmured, arching her back and taking him deep inside of her.

She held him as his body shuddered, his hips thrusting irregularly. When he finally stilled, she dropped numerous little kisses over his entire face. Without a word, L picked her up, taking her to her bedroom. He lay her on the bed, fitting his body next to hers.

L did not return her declaration of love earlier, and he did not do so now. She had not expected him to say those three words to her. She had voiced her feelings to him and that was enough for her in this moment. If he had reiterated the sentiment so easily, she probably would have viewed his words as insincere. When, and if, he said I love you, she wanted him to mean those words with all of his heart.

* * *

~\\..'../~

Drifting from sleep into wakefulness, Lily gradually became aware she was not alone in her bed. She rolled over, stretching languidly in the process. She felt good, rested despite her short sleeping time. Her entire body tingled with the remembrance of him making love to her.

Time to face the day. Positively elated, she opened her eyes. There he was. So far today was looking pretty good.

Lying on his belly beside her, L had one arm folded under his head which was half buried under the pillow. He looked so angelic and beautiful. She touched his cheek to be sure he was real. His eyes moved under his eyelids. His long black eyelashes fluttered then opened to reveal his coal black irises.

"Good morning, sleepy head. You keep this up and you'll get rid of your permanently smudged natural eyeliner," she teased him referring his dark circles of sleeplessness.

"You're like a drug," he said, rolling up onto his side. "Your side effects are unexpected and varied. You're possibly addictive."

Lily smiled when he returned her affectionate gesture by stroking her cheek. Her eyes and her hands skimmed over his silky white skin stopping at his hip. His jeans were still unbuttoned and unzipped but stubbornly clung to his narrow hips. Coarse black pubic hair curled through the open zipper reminding her what else lay beneath the denim.

She blushed hotly, returning her eyes to his that were glued to her face. He had caught her looking. Her blush grew hotter, and she feared she might spontaneously combust.

"Want to do it again?" he asked her.

Not the most romantic segue into sex but it suited his personality and his usual blunt method of operation. She did not expect anything different from him.

Since they were already half naked, it did not take long for them to completely undress each other. Her nightgown was pulled over her head and carelessly tossed to the side. With a little help from Lily, L shimmied out of his jeans and flung them across the room. Then they made love slowly, not caring about the time.

Light could wait. He would be left waiting all damn day if it took them that long.


	32. Show, but Don't Tell

When Lily arrived at the restaurant, a woman sat in the chair across from Light. She had not been _that_ late. Only an hour. She had texted him well before the appointed meeting time warning him it would be a while. For some reason he had arrived early, extremely early, and said he would wait. Apparently in his boredom he decided to take an audience with another member of the female persuasion.

 _What the hell is this?_ , Lily fumed silently, glaring at the woman then at Light. Both of them were totally unaware of her presence and her anger. She was not jealous. She had the man she wanted. However, she was irritated that Light was wasting her time bringing her here when he had scheduled a previous meeting. She was wasting her time here with Light when she could be with L.

The woman was blond with pigtails pulled up on the sides of her head, the rest of her straight yellow blond hair flowing down her back. She wore large round sunglasses to hide her eyes, maybe her identity like she was someone famous. Her face was small and thin just like the rest of her body. She wore a short, sleeveless, black leather and lace dress and knee high black leather boots with a four inch thick sole. The boots looked like they belonged to Frankenstein's monster not a petite cute blonde. A large silver cross dangled from the black leather choker around her neck. Several silver necklaces of varying lengths and thicknesses, some with crosses, some without, hung around her neck as well. Lily wondered how she sat up straight under the weight of the jewelry.

There was something vaguely familiar about the woman. Lily was not too familiar with celebrities, never watching television or reading trendy magazines. She chose to spend her time reading classic books or cooking or doing anything else besides keeping up with the outside world. Long ago she had gotten into the habit of creating a bubble around herself, making her own little private world where the outside could not intrude. She figured if things got bad enough, the world would come after her anyway. So far she had been correct in that assumption.

Then she remembered seeing the blonde's picture on magazines left by university students on tables at the bakery. Giving the covers only a cursory glance before throwing them away, she was surprised she remembered this person. This woman who looked like a child playing dress up was Misa Misa, the pop singer L and the others had been discussing at the picnic.

 _Seriously? She's one of Light's girlfriends? You've got to be kidding! But then again, why am I shocked the ultimate chick magnet, the perfect man, would not grab the attention of a celebrity?_ , she thought to herself. Like his out of control ego needed this kind of a boost.

"Unbelievable," she muttered, approaching the table.

Lily boldly stepped up to the table. Light boredly glanced up at her, probably assuming she was a server come to take their order. His wide eyed, gape mouthed double take almost made her laugh with malicious delight. Instead, she allowed a grin of dark glee to stretch her lips while she seethed inside because she left L to have to deal with this brand of bullshit.

"Hello, Light. I thought we had a date," she said, casting a passing glimpse at the blonde after she squeaked in shock. Perhaps she assumed Lily had recognized her and had come to request an autograph. Not hardly. "But since you are otherwise engaged, I'll be leaving."

"No, wait," Light said, seizing her hand when she turned to go. "Misa was just leaving."

"No, I wasn't, Light," the woman countered, sounding like a child with her high-pitched whiny voice. She folded her arms under her small breasts that were shoved to the top of the tight lace up leather bodice. "I was here first. She should leave."

 _Ugh, really?_ , Lily groaned internally, seeing the woman indulge in shameless pouting by poking out her bottom lip painted a dark blood red.

"You are leaving, Misa. Now," he commanded her, treating her according to her actions.

"Okay, Light," she reluctantly agreed, standing up. "I'll call you later."

"Yeah, I'm afraid you will," Light muttered rather than offering a proper good-bye.

If she had not been so angry, Lily might have laughed at his parting words to Misa Misa. Not only did he insult her, but he rudely dismissed a woman millions of other men would give a body part to be with. Receiving a scathing glance from Misa on her way out, Lily smiled politely in return. She had received too many of those looks on a daily basis in school for it to bother her now.

Light had seemed irritated and flat out revolted by Misa's presence which confounded Lily. Why would he choose to be around someone he so obviously detests? She was sure he had his reasons. He always did.

"You look lovely today," Light greeted her, standing to his feet. He took her by the hand, leading her to chair Misa Misa had recently vacated. After sitting her down, he kissed her cheek. "It's good to see you again."

 _Wish I could say the same._ Once upon a time, Lily had looked forward to seeing Light every day. Less than a year ago, he was her sun, the center of her universe. Now, he was like the moon: engulfed in darkness, a reflection of light rather than the source of it. He had become a mere copy, a shadow of himself.

"You look different. You're positively glowing. Oh," he gasped, an oily lecherous grin tilting his lips. "I know what you did last night."

"Jealous?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Yes," he admitted, raising his hand to signal a server. "I was hoping I would be the one to get the ice queen to open up. I wanted to hear you moan my name as you writhed under me."

Lily lowered her gaze unable to maintain eye contact after he made such insolent, salacious comments. A cup of coffee was slid onto the table in front of her along with a plate of fresh fruit and a glass of water.

"I hope you don't mind that I took the liberty of ordering for you," he said, confident and not really caring if she did mind.

"Sure. Why not? You always did enjoy making decisions for me," she muttered, picking up the small white cream pitcher next to her cup of coffee.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he inquired.

"Why am I here, Light?" she questioned him, bypassing his query. "Especially since it seems you made other plans."

"Misa? No. The only woman I planned meeting today was you. She just showed up. Unannounced and unwanted," he said, a vicious edge to his voice.

"So are you saying she's stalking you?" Lily asked, repulsed by his egotism. A national singing sensation with millions of fans stalking him? The audacity! "So what other surprises do you have in store for me?"

"I ordered Eggs Benedict for you. It's your favorite, right?"

That's not what she meant. But it is her favorite. Him remembering her preferences warmed her inside. She quickly told herself to tone down the happy and turn off the warm fuzzies. The past was the past. He was not the same man. Maybe he was like this then, and she just could not admit the truth to herself.

"Do you know why I date so many women?" he inquired.

Lily groaned in agitation, rolling her eyes. "I can honestly say I have absolutely no idea."

"In each one of them, I can find a small piece of you, your personality. Some little something that reminds me of you. A facial expression like the way you roll your eyes. A little quirk like your stutter. Your sassiness and independence. Between all of them I can find bits and pieces of you, but not one of them is you. I need them all. Because I don't have you."

Lily stared at the plate of cantaloupe and honeydew melon. Her pulse pounded in her head. Her entire brain throbbed to the cadence of her runaway heartbeat.

Light stared her without saying a word. She could feel his eyes on her, assessing her and attempting to decipher her thoughts.

"What?" she hissed, meeting his forthright gaze.

"Say something," he urged her.

"What do you want me to say, Light? Tell me," she demanded, sitting up straighter in her chair.

He shrugged displaying his open palms in a surrender gesture. "Something. Anything. Tell me how you feel about me."

Lily rolled her eyes and nodded. "Okay, let me tell you how I feel about you."

Light sat back in his chair, folding his arms over his chest like a shield to protect himself from the verbal onslaught.

"I don't know how I feel about you. I want to hate you. You make it so easy," she scoffed. "But something...something just won't allow me to hate your guts."

"Do you love me?" he ventured, smiling broadly at her.

"Don't push it," she snapped, picking up her glass of water to take a drink.

"Okay," he chuckled softly. "I really did love you though."

"Past tense?"

"I don't know. I've been kind of confused about things myself since you came back into my life, Lily."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing we can agree on something after all," she rejoined cheerily despite feeling anything but upbeat and happy.

The server arrived with their food, setting the platters in front of them along with glasses of orange juice. Lily sighed with relief after receiving the distraction of food. Although her appetite had failed to show up when the food did, at least the conversation would be put on hold while they ate.

"Lily, do you have any plans this afternoon?" he queried, poking at the creamy yellowish sauce on top of the poached egg.

"No," she lied. She was in a hurry to back to the suite and L, not wanting to spend a minute longer with Light than she had to. But there was the case to consider which superseded her feelings in importance. She could not allow her emotions to rule her decisions or actions. L himself had told her that. "What did you have in mind?"

"Why don't we take a walk in the park? Like we used to," he added, going for the nostalgia angle to cajole her to agree.

"Okay," she agreed hesitantly. She could feel the cold steely jaws of the trap being set.

Lily's entire body vibrated, trembling from the inside out. Light ruthlessly stabbed the egg, the yellow orange yolk oozing out onto his plate. She jumped when the tines of his fork scraped across the plate to make a bone jarring screech.

 _Calm down. It's just a walk in the park_ , the voice inside her head coached her to soothe her jangled nerves. However, on a metaphorical level, nothing was ever just a walk in the park with Light.

~~~\\\/~~~

 _Be patient. Stay calm. Take your time. Don't blow it now,_ Light thought, watching her out of the corner of his eye as they strolled along.

They were on opposite sides of the wide path that snaked its way through the park. All evidence of the festival was gone which was a good thing. He did not want to be reminded of that night which had been a humiliating failure for him. It was then that Kiyomi knew for certain something was going on between himself and Lily. Thankfully, Kiyomi remained blissfully unaware of how one sided the affair was. His relationship with Lily still festered in his mind, not yet reaching physical fruition.

 _It's a matter of time, Lily,_ he mused, rotating his head to get a clearer view of her.

She was wearing a a little white top; basically a square of filmy silk that barely met her waist and was held over her shoulders by thin straps. A single gossamer ruffle decorated the top of the shirt accentuating her breasts giving the illusion of trying to hide them under a veil. Her long white skirt skimmed her hips and behind, flaring out to leave her legs unhindered. The flat thong sandals gave the illusion she was walking around in bare feet.

Light sighed. He liked her brown sun warmed skin but also missed her ivory complexion and loads of freckles. His fingers could have played an enticing game of dot to dot on her body. When he fantasized about touching her, a nauseating revelation blew apart his tantalizing daydream. L had touched her. Not only touched her but had sex with her. Worse yet, he had beat Light to conquering the ice queen.

The gentle pressure of a hand on his upper arm brought her into focus. He was pleased to see she stood beside him with her hand resting on his bicep.

"Are you all right? You look like you're not feeling well," she noted, looking sincerely concerned. Her eyebrows were pinched together and her pretty lips had turned down into a frown.

"I'm fine. It's just a little too hot out," he remarked, sweat trickling down his back. How disgusting.

"That's an understatement," she muttered in agreement, her cheeks pink from the hot sun beating down on them.

"Why don't we go somewhere for something cold to drink?" he suggested.

"That's a great idea," she happily consented, glancing around. "But where do we go?"

"There's a karaoke bar on the main street not too far from here." He had no desire to sing, but they would be assigned a private room with air conditioning and a lock on the door. The wordless music could play in the background creating a nice, preferably romantic, atmosphere.

"A karaoke bar? Really? Okay," she laughed, wiping away the sweat from her forehead with back of her hand. "But don't ask me to sing."

"No problem. You have to promise to do the same for me too," he laughed easily. This easy interaction reminded him of the way they used to be.

There was an odd sensation in his chest, a sharp stinging pain, but it was gone before he could fathom the cause. Heart attack? Ha, ha - oh the irony. He knew that twit Misa Misa was far too infatuated with him to write his name down in her Death Note.

Never in his most insane dreams would he have imagined he would meet another person with a Death Note. Not only that, she had the Shinigami Eyes that Ryuk had tried to make a deal with him to possess. She could see people's real names enabling him to get rid of them. He needed to get her close to L soon so he could discover the man's last name and take care of the one major obstacle to his perfect world. Then he could shake her off of him as well. She was stuck to him like glue, and he hated her for it.

Although at first she had been a dream come true, Misa Misa became a terrifying nightmare in her relentless pursuit of him romantically. He was not dazzled by her stardom. As a matter of fact, her notoriety could be a detriment to his goals by bringing unwanted attention to him. He already had enough unwanted attention coming from L. He did not need it from her or her crazed fans.

In addition to her irritating girlish crush and tenacious stalking, Misa was stupid. So incredibly stupid. She posed a very real threat to him due to being an air head. He needed to use her, and cut her loose quickly before she ruined any of his hard work.

Once the room had been assigned and a tab opened, Light ushered her down the hallway lined by closed doors on both sides. Each door was painted a different color and had a number on it. He opened the red door with the gold number one to the right at the end of the hall. Number one. That was definitely him.

"Get whatever you want to eat and drink," he told her when they entered the small room.

There was an white leather couch against one wall with a white lacquer coffee table in front of it. Posters of popular singers, including Misa Misa, covered the walls like wallpaper. In one corner there was small stage with a tv screen behind it and one on a pedestal in front of the microphone stand. A tiny kitchenette with a mini-fridge, microwave, and shelves stocked with snacks took up the other corner.

Lily opened the refrigerator taking out two bottles of water, giving one to Light before sitting down on the opposite end of the sofa far away from him. The cool room was a welcome respite from the heat. Light opened one of the big binders full of song selections.

"You can sit closer to me. I'm not a stranger," he remarked tonelessly to avoid sounding creepy. He slid the binder to the middle of the table.

"This was a great idea," she sighed after drinking half of the bottle of water. The cold leather against her skin caused goosebumps to rise over her arms and legs.

"I miss you, Lily. Can we pick up where we left off? It hasn't been that long really," he said, placing his hand on her knee.

"Light, a lot has happened. I don't think we can ever go back to the way things were. Ever," she added, picking up his hand. She patted the back of it before placing his hand on his own knee. Her throat had gone as dry as a desert. "Want another drink? A soda this time?"

"Sure," he answered, watching her stand. His eyes followed her as she crossed the room.

He was finding it difficult to not feel snubbed by her obvious avoidance of him. What the hell? No one could ever get to him like she did, even now. He thought he had gotten over it. Gotten over her and his silly dalliance with love. Such a useless emotion. It made one weak and tragically irrational. Neither of which he could afford. His plans to scrub the world free of human debris required complete rationale and self-control. She could steal away his reasoning with a single word or a look. Being near her made him emotional, causing him to forsake his sensibilities.

From across the room, Light saw the dozens of small white streaks across her back for the first time. His Father had told him they found her lying on her back in a sea of blood and broken glass. They had been sure she was dead. Although he had read the reports and been given small details here and there by his Father, Light still wondered what had really gone on in her apartment that night. Ryuk knew something, but he refused to say anything.

Light walked across the room to her, his steps soundless on the indoor/outdoor carpet. He waited until she stood up from the refrigerator and placed the two glass bottles of soda on the counter before he touched her. He pressed his fingertips over the largest scar on her right shoulder blade, and she instantly jumped. However, she did not shrink away from him. Emboldened by her stillness, he glided his fingertips across several of the scars colored a creamy white in contrast to her nut brown skin.

"What happened to you that night?" he asked in a hoarse whisper. His Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed repeatedly to clear the annoying sentiment from his voice.

"I would rather not talk about it. Not even a year has passed since it happened. I'm not ready," she said, her words soft but steady.

She had grown stronger. A year ago she would have been in tears. But of course, the ongoing chain of tragic events in her life had not left her much choice but to get stronger - or go crazy.

Light lowered his mouth to her left shoulder blade, placing kisses over the marks there. Goosebumps rose again, roughening her smooth skin under his lips.

"Light, please, don't do that," she begged.

Her plea only served to spur him on rather than deterring him. His hands skimmed the length of her arms while he moved closer to press the front of his torso to her back. His hands covered hers that were clutching the counter as if she were hanging on to it for dear life.

"I'm sorry. I would have been there for you. I'm sure it wasn't easy. Why did you break up with me? I loved you."

"Loved? Past tense?" She almost sounded hopeful the emotion was part of the past.

"I haven't let go." He enclosed her waist with his arms to reinforce his words with a suitable physical action. Her body stiffened in resistance, but he would not relinquish his hold. "I love you," he whispered, his lips grazing the side of her neck. "Very much present tense."

"Light, please don't do this to me. Or yourself," she added. "It's over between us. The romantic, intimate relationship you want will never happen."

Light smiled when her body started to tremble from his closeness. Things between them would not be over until he decided they were over.

"You can at least answer my question. Can't you do that one little thing for me?"

"Which question?"

Light wanted to snatch her around and yell in her face 'you know damn well which question!' Holding his temper, he enclosed her waist with his arms, content to keep her back to him.

"Why did you break up with me?" Somehow he managed not to snarl at her despite his boiling anger.

"Because I thought it would be better for you to not be with me. I would have only held you back. I would have been a problem for you. A cause of embarrassment. In time, you would have grown to resent me, hate me. I couldn't live with that," she said, her body shaking harder until his body was quaking.

"That's not true," he insisted, slowly turning her to face him.

Before allowing her the time to jerk free from his embrace, he kissed her. This time, she did not fight him. She not only accepted the kiss, she kissed him back.

~~~\\\/~~~

Lily heard the chuckle, low and sinister, when Light's mouth covered hers for the forceful kiss. She opened her eyes, seeing the weird, scary clown hovering above them close to the ceiling. To keep from screaming at the sight of the Shinigami, she pressed her lips back to Light's, inadvertently deepening the kiss.

 _Oh, what fresh new hell have I gotten myself into now,_ she contemplated, carefully tapering off the kiss rather than wrenching away.

"Why don't you come over to my house for dinner tomorrow night?" Light asked, brushing a stray wisp of hair away from her eyes as he looked into them.

The Shinigami was real. Her eyes dared to dart back to the bizarre creature sitting on the ceiling still watching them. So that meant the notebook was definitely real. She needed to find that notebook, the irrefutable proof L required. Then hopefully this nightmare would end. However, the conclusion of the case might be the end of her relationship with L as well. But that did not matter. The killing had to stop. She needed to know L would be safe.

The notebook would not be easy to find. Where would Light hide it for safe keeping? The best and most obvious place to start searching would be his bedroom. And he had invited her to dinner at his house. How convenient. Unfortunately, he still lived at home which would create some extremely uncomfortable situations.

"But what about your parents? Won't seeing me again be strange for your Father? How will either one of you explain me to your mother?" She grew incredibly uneasy when he smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. Of course he had an answer to her question before she had asked it.

"That's the most beautiful part. They left today to go on a week long holiday to celebrate their twenty fifth anniversary," he replied.

Problem solved. Oh, yay. They would be alone in the house together with no interruptions.

"But my sister Sayu will be home around ten thirty. If you don't mind, I'd like for you to leave before she gets home."

"No problem. I understand. It's just dinner after all. I'll be gone way before she gets home."

Thank you, Cinderella. The _just friends_ thing was failing spectacularly so far, getting too cozy too fast, which made her antsy about just dinner.


	33. A Coming Storm

"I'm going to bed. Would you like to join me?" Lily asked flirtatiously, reaching out to touch L's cheek.

"I can't," L responded flatly, brushing her hand away before she could touch him.

"Oh," she murmured, holding her hand as if she had been physically injured by his callous brush off. The real sting of pain was in her heart. "Well, good night then."

L kept his eyes fixed to the computer screen in front of him. Displayed on the monitor was a DNA report from the police department's lab and a second one from an independent lab, positioned side by side. On the desk in front of him lay a dozen or more small plastic bags containing individual hairs, miscellaneous fibers, and random pieces of paper.

"I've got a lot to catch up on. I spent far too much time being distracted and indulging in pointless endeavors like sleeping," he murmured, stabbing the keys with his forefingers to make the screen go black before she could read anything.

"Pointless endeavors," she mumbled to herself. The words were like a punch in her gut. Something big was happening. Perhaps she should cancel her dinner plans with Light.

"You're going to see Light tomorrow night. Dinner?" he inquired, his eyes skimming the wall of screens. He made it sound like a pleasant social visit.

"Yes. But if you don't want me to - "

"You should go," he interrupted. "There's a new develop. This case has gotten more complicated as if that were possible. I have the feeling we are extremely close to something. I believe we are on the cusp of the breakthrough we need."

"I hope so," she agreed, her stomach clenching with apprehension. He had a feeling huh? Then her evening with Light was sure to be the clusterfuck she anticipated.

Her eyes went to the screens expecting to be able to see what Light was doing at this moment. Instead of seeing his bedroom, she saw the video of a prison yard where the prisoners were walking around in a circle in the rain. Lily had been depending on that camera to be her saving grace tomorrow night should events get out of hand. L would be watching, and he could call or do something - anything - to stop whatever was happening should it become necessary. Now, that safeguard was gone.

On the previously recorded footage, she watched as one inmate dropped, then another, and one more. The other men broke formation, scattering in a panic. Some ran to the tall chain link fence topped with razor wire surrounding the exercise yard to try to climb over or dig under. The rest of the group ran to bang on the doors to the building screaming and begging for entry. A few men lay on the ground unconscious. Others crawled around in confusion. All were injured during the mad scramble.

 _And I'm going to be alone tomorrow night with the man who caused this_ , she thought to herself. She swallowed hard to prevent herself from throwing up. Light had not hurt her - yet. For quite a while she had been living on borrowed time. One day her time was bound to run out.

"I took the surveillance cameras out of the residences. I removed the one from Light's bedroom while you two were out on your date," L said, tonelessly as always.

"Glad I could be of service. I suppose my performance is satisfactory at last," she muttered, lacing and unlacing her fingers.

"You can do this. I'm trusting today went well," he ventured, seeking a confirmation from her. He sounded bored and uninterested. Picking up one of the bags by the smallest piece of a corner, he examined the golden blond strand inside, turning it this way and that, as if switching angles would give him the answer he needed.

Lily stared at him, trying not to feel hurt by him ignoring her. Beginning a romance in the midst of a murder investigation was a stupid thing to do, and she never meant for it to happen. She really did not have the right to feel slighted or upset by his behavior. The fault was all her own for nursing an immature romantic notion at such an inappropriate time. Love or romance, or semblances of either, had no place here except for the purpose of manipulation and deception. How quickly she forgot again why she was here. She had to stop being forgetful. No one could afford for her to make stupid mistakes.

"Your performance could be viewed as a complete success. I'm hoping tomorrow night will yield the results I need to close this case," he stated curtly.

"Me too," she mumbled, puffing out her cheeks and blowing out a noisy breath.

 _No pressure_ , the voice inside her head spoke. _You can do this. He said so._

"Good night, L."

"Good night, Lily."

Lily raised her head, squared her shoulders, and inhaled deeply. She went to her bedroom, refraining from slamming the door. Current circumstances required her to push past her emotions and think. Too much was at stake. L's life was on the line.

Desperate times call for desperate measures, and she was definitely desperate. Lily needed a way to keep Light under control, to be able stop him should he decide to go further than a kiss. Then an idea came to her. She was going for dinner. If she slipped something into his food or drink, possibly both, she could sedate him. Knocking him completely unconscious would give her the opportunity she needed to hunt for the notebook without getting caught - or manhandled. She shuddered at the mental image of his hands moving over her body.

Lily opened the large drawer of her make up table pulling out the gallon zip top plastic bag full of medication bottles. Dumping them out on the table, she rifled through the bottles in search of the tranquilizers and sleep inducing drugs. Her fingers shook as she popped off the tops, taking out two or three pills of several different prescriptions. Using the back of her hairbrush, she crushed the pills mixing the powder together before sweeping it into one of the bottles she emptied. Dosing Light would be a tricky endeavor. She wanted to make him sleep but not forever.

Lily started picking out her clothes for the dinner date. A pair of stretchy denim leggings would keep her legs completely covered from Light's view plus he would have to fight to peel that second skin off of her should he decide to get a little too touchy feely. She found L's short sleeved t-shirt hanging in her closet. This was the shirt he had worn at the tennis match and the only short sleeved t-shirt he owned. She smiled. This lovely piece would complete her fashion statement. Surely Light would not find her appealing wearing a piece of L's clothing.

L is everything Light is not. Bizarre, capricious, mysterious. Good looking in a not so classic way. His truthfulness about his dishonesty had been refreshing. A good heart lay hidden under layers and layers of deceit and weirdness most people would not care to peel away. In turn, he knew and accepted all parts of her; her past, her present, her everything. And he loved her anyway. Whether he knew it yet or not.

Light is undeniably handsome. The face of an angel hides the demon inside. He seemed predictable and boring. A goody two shoes. The perfect son, the perfect student, the perfect man. But he is none of those things. He used people like all of the women he was dating. A liar, a cheat, a murderer. He loved her in his own scary, obsessive way. He would not hesitate to kill her to protect his identity as Kira. Did he really love anyone besides himself, even his own family?

"This is a very dangerous game you are playing with your life," Itachi Okada said from behind her. "I do not approve of your tactics."

Lily was glad she was sitting down otherwise she might have fainted. Too stunned to move, she did not jump or react in any way. Releasing the breath she had been holding in a loud gush, she closed her eyes then slowly opened them.

"Well, if one of the three of you doesn't scare me to death first I think I'll be okay," she murmured, slowly rotating on her backless seat to face him. "Besides, wasn't it you who insisted it was my duty to do this?"

Itachi Okada had chosen his diminutive but intimidating plague doctor form. His gloved hand grasped the crow's head carved out of ebony on the top of his cane. He wore a long black coat and a top hat, looking like a rather dapper gentleman wearing an extremely creepy mask.

"I suppose it was," he admitted.

He looked so old and small in this form. He leaned heavily upon his cane. His voice sounded tired and breathy when he spoke.

"Are you all right?"

"Don't worry about me. You are the one in danger here."

"I'm aware. I have to do something fast to end this."

"Are you frightened?" he asked, coming closer to her.

"Of course I'm scared. I'm reckless, not crazy," confessing her own shortcoming apparent to them both.

"You're running faster into peril than your guardian angel can fly," he warned her. "Did you see him? The Shinigami?"

"I did," she responded, issuing another long sigh. "He scares the hell out of me. He looks crazy. But the kind of crazy that has a purpose...a calculated reason for their insanity."

"Like Light Yagami?"

"Hmmm," she hummed, retreating into her thoughts. "I'm finding it difficult to decide if these gifts you've given me are really a gift or a curse. I could have lived a long time without the knowledge of the Death Note or seeing that Shinigami."

Okada exhaled loudly, the mask transforming the simple sigh into an eerie, robotic sound. He came closer, standing in front of her.

"If I hadn't given you these gifts you'd be dead already." He lay his hand on her shoulder. "Or worse, you'd be caught in the trap Light had laid for you. You'd be his shield and protector. You quite possibly would have taken the fall for him if he allowed you to live that long."

"Funny you should say that. I never quite trusted Light. I always felt like he had ulterior motives. I suppose you're responsible for putting that little bee in my bonnet, not allowing me to shake the suspicion no matter how far in love with him I fell."

"I swore to myself I would protect you to repay you for your kindness," he said, pulling three feathers out of his pocket. "I'm giving you another gift."

"What will this gift cost me?" She stared at the short black feathers in his palm.

"A true gift comes with no price to the receiver. No expectations or conditions from the giver. These are for your protection."

Itachi Okada pressed the feathers to her shoulder. The first one shrank and disappeared under skin. A white outline the shape of the feather etched itself onto her golden brown skin as if put there by an invisible tattoo artist. The same thing happened with the other two. Grunting as if in pain, he dropped to his knees.

"What's wrong?" she gasped, sliding off the seat of her chair to her knees in front him. She put her arms around his narrow shoulders. He felt so frail in her arms as he struggled to breath.

Crow touched her cheek with his fingers covered in soft white cotton gloves. "I never said gifts do not come without a price to the giver."

"Stop this. Stop this now," she begged. "Take it back. Please, take it back. All of it, if it means you'll live."

"I'm not dying. Stop fussing over me," he admonished her gruffly but hugged her back warmly. "It just means I will have to return to the heavenly realm. I'll no longer be able to stay with you."

"But you can't..." A strangled sob prevented her from speaking her next words. _Why?,_ she thought, wanting to give voice to the words so badly. _Why are you doing this to yourself for me?_

 _It's what you do when you love someone,_ he answered directly inside her head. _You will sacrifice anything to make them happy. To save them, if necessary. I will stay with you as long as I can. But one day..._

Then, he disappeared in a blur although she was pretty sure the softening of his form into a haze was due to the tears clouding her vision. His parting words replayed in her mind. She understood. She would sacrifice anything to make L happy and to protect him.

* * *

~\\..'../~

Lily stood at the great wall of windows overlooking the balcony. Dawn broke casting a foreboding reddish hue to the steel gray sky.

"Red sky at morning, sailor's take warning," L spoke, appearing beside her.

Lily was too tired to be startled. Exhaustion acted as a tranquilizer for her. She needed a bit of tranquility for her upcoming dinner. Her mind turned to the pills, but she needed to be sharp, having all of her wits about her. Light would need to be sedated, not her.

"Good morning, Captain Ahab," she muttered into her coffee cup without looking at him.

"Ugh," he grunted at her reference, but obviously he understood. "Do you think Light is my elusive white whale?"

"I suppose so." She turned to stare at L. "I'll be your harpoon, O Captain, my Captain."

"Hmmm," he hummed thoughtfully, chewing on the tip of his thumb while he returned her stubborn gaze, taking up her challenge of a staring contest. "There's a storm coming."

Lily raised her eyebrows. "You have no idea."


	34. The Tempest

Raindrops spattered the windshield of the Rolls Royce forming large, wet circles. The force of the rain hitting the glass mimicked the sound of a rapidly firing machine gun. Lightning zigzagged across the sky. Thunder followed, rattling the pavement under the tires when the car paused at the stop light. The heavens opened up, dumping gallons of rain as if god poured out a bucket of water.

"Oh, this is bad...so bad," Lily groaned, watching sheets of rain blowing across the window, driven by the powerful wind.

"Miss, are you positive you do not want to cancel these plans?" Watari questioned her, slowly pressing on the gas pedal when the light turned green.

"I have to do this, Watari. It's important," she replied resolutely, taking deep breaths to slow her rapidly beating heart. Anxiety, fear, dread...all of it mixed and settled in her stomach like a boulder.

"I fully understand the importance of the matter," he returned, a bit miffed. "Are you sure there would not be a more opportune time to go forward with the plan?"

"No. It has to be tonight. A now or never kind of thing. Strike while the iron's hot. Get while the getting is good. All of those hokey sayings," she chattered nervously. "You know as well as I do that this is a time sensitive matter. No time can be wasted because of a little thunderstorm."

"Little thunderstorm," he repeated incredulously.

Lightning sliced across the black sky, splitting open another cloud to unleash a deluge of rain. Watari pulled up to the curb, stopping the car parallel to the front gate of Light's house.

"Please be safe, Miss Lily."

She no longer argued with him about calling her Miss.

For a moment, they both stared at the nice, moderate two story house. So common and plain, the structure looked exactly like a half dozen other houses on the street: a simple ivory colored box with a marginally pitched brown roof and brown trim. It reminded her a little of the Tudor style homes in England. The house was no mansion but big enough to offer plenty of room for a family of four.

A light in one of the upstairs rooms glowed warmly through the cold, gray rain. She wondered if that was Light's bedroom.

Lily chewed her lower lip, recalling her forgotten dream. She and Light lived in a house much like this one. Once upon a dream, she wanted to be his wife, the mother of his children. Exhaling the breath she had been holding, she reached into her purse for her phone to text Light.

Lily [8:02]: _I'm here. It may be while before I come in. I'm going to wait for a break in the rain._

The downstairs window by the front door lit up. The round globed light fixture above the door flickered to life. The door swung open, and Light dashed out. He was wearing a trench coat style rain coat and holding an umbrella above his head. Those two things did nothing to keep his jeans and shoes from getting soaked. Water splashed all over the place as he ran across the flooded sidewalk toward the gate. He was coming to get her. Chivalry was not dead.

God, if he were not a reprehensible egomaniac and unrepentant murderer, he really would be the perfect man. Damn him anyway for still managing to be such a nice guy even it was an act - and a really good one. She would have to be careful not to fall for it.

Light opened the gate and waved for her to get out of the car.

"Oh, god," she gasped, snatching open the door to jump out.

Although there was only five feet of sidewalk between them, with no rain coat and no umbrella to shield her, the pounding rain penetrated her shirt straight through to her skin. She shot through the gate and into his open arms to take shelter under the umbrella.

"Are you crazy? Why didn't you at least wear a rain coat?" he asked her, tucking her under his arm and his coat.

"It wasn't raining when I left," she replied. The reason sounded so much dumber when she said it out loud. She really had not been thinking about the weather while getting ready. Then she had hoped against hope they would beat the rain on the drive over.

Unfortunately, the thin metal skeleton of the waterproof covering could not withstand the whipping wind which caught the umbrella and swiftly turned it inside out. Suddenly it was like a bomb exploded. There was a blinding flash of lightning followed by a deafening boom of thunder. Light dropped the broken umbrella, enveloping her with both arms to rush full speed to the door.

Light opened the door, pushing her inside and running in behind her, slamming it shut. They stood in the foyer panting for air and dripping on the hardwood floor. The rain had pasted Light's hair to his cheeks completely covering his eyes. His black t-shirt had melted to his torso and his jeans to his legs. His shoes squelched when he kicked them off into the corner.

Lily's white t-shirt had gone scandalously transparent. Her jeans were positively unseemly shrink wrapped to her thighs and calves. Her bare toes curled against the wooden floor under her feet. She had lost her shoes, a pair of thong sandals, somewhere outside in their mad dash to the door. Fat water droplets covered the lenses her glasses so she pulled them off to throw them into her leather purse which was wet on the outside but not on the inside. At least one thing was not soaked through and through by the rain.

The wind and thunder roared outside like a commuter train rolling past the house. Lily started to visibly tremor.

"Thunderstorms still scare you. Don't they?" Light guessed rather than assuming she was cold.

Lily tried not to find it endearing that he remembered. Through chattering teeth she lied, "I'm cold."

"And you're absolutely indecent," he rejoined, openly staring at her breasts.

Lily folded her arms over her chest to hide her breasts from his view. Him being such a lecher was indecent. Her beige bra did nothing to cover up her erect nipples which strained against the cotton fabric of her shirt. How could he not be staring at her breasts? He was a man after all. Her eyes followed the curves of his pectoral muscles outlined by the t-shirt sticking to his chest. She would stare at his too, but she doubted it was the same type of experience for her.

"Can I have a towel?" She glanced down at the puddle forming around her feet. "Maybe two or three."

"The bathroom is upstairs, on the left. You can take a hot shower to warm up," he suggested. She must have looked repelled by his suggestion because he quickly added with a nervous chuckle, "Don't worry. I won't try to join you. I'll take a shower and change down here in my parent's bathroom. I need to clean up this mess anyway."

"Up the stairs and to the left?" she asked, pointing to the stairs.

"Yes," he confirmed. "Towels are hanging on the rack by the shower."

Lily watched him walk away, peeling off his shirt as he went. Her eyes wanted to linger on his back, to study the muscles shifting under his skin on either side of his spine with each little movement of his arms. She waited until he disappeared into a room, closing the door behind him. Running up the stairs, she peeked into the open door on her left.

There was a separate shower and tub like most Japanese style bathrooms. The shower was an enclosed, frosted glass stall. She stared at the deep tub that was built halfway down into the floor.

"Nice," she murmured to herself, wishing she could take a bath. No time for that. The last thing she wanted was a bathing buddy.

After depositing her purse on the counter by the sink, Lily began the arduous task of peeling off her clothes. The shirt was relatively easy to take off. Bending over at the waist, she grasped the hem of the shirt and allowed gravity to assist her with pulling it from her body to fall to the floor with a wet plop. Using a combination of awkward dance moves and hopping on alternating legs, she finally removed the pants, miraculously without falling and breaking her tailbone.

Lily turned the water on all hot and full blast. She entered the glass shower stall to thrust her head under the hot water allowing the heat to warm her entire body. Once she felt sufficiently thawed from the freezing rain, she turned off the water. The towel rack was within arms reach when she opened the door. She wrapped the fluffy light blue towel around her body, using the second towel to dry her hair.

Lily did her best to finger style her damp, frizzy curls then grabbed her purse to retrieve her glasses. After cleaning and putting them on, she opened the door, glancing both ways down the hall. There was a door across the hall from the bathroom, a second to the left of it, and a third by the bathroom door. They were all closed. So which door led to Light's bedroom? Taking a chance, she tried the door across the hall.

"Bingo," she whispered to herself, standing at the door.

All of this looked familiar from seeing it on the monitor from L's surveillance camera. Shelves full of books lined two and a half walls. The student's desk where Light sat to do his homework was positioned against the wall beside the partial bookcase. The rest of the spartan furnishings included a small television on a stand in the corner and a twin bed covered with a baby blue duvet.

Her eyes bounced between the bookshelves and the desk. Where in the hell was the Death Note? She cast a furtive glance at the bed. Surely Light did not hide the notebook between the mattress and box springs. Maybe he stashed a collection of porn there like most men his age would. Who knew what other dirty secrets Light harbored besides being a killer? The voyeuristic, borderline pervert L probably knew all those secrets since he had stared for hours at the images broadcast from the camera. But that camera was gone now.

An excessively loud clap of thunder almost made her jump out of her skin. A draft rushed over her skin as if someone had walked past her, reminding her she was standing in nothing but a damp towel.

Lily boldly entered the lair of Light Yagami. She carelessly tossed her purse onto the bed then crossed the room to slide open the shuttered doors of his closet. Not only was his closet divided into sections of pants and shirts, they were also categorized by type (e.g. the shirts: casual, dress, long sleeved, short sleeved), by season, and by color. His shoes were arranged by color and style on the floor under the clothing.

"You've got to be shitting me," she muttered irritably to herself. She could not help but feel appalled and envious at the same time by his excessive obsession with order.

 _What a tight ass. If you shoved a piece of coal up Light's ass, would you pull out a diamond in a week?,_ she mused, making herself giggle at her own silly thought.

Lily thumbed through the shirts, picking a royal blue dress shirt with long sleeves. Sliding her arms into the sleeves, she allowed the towel to drop to the floor before buttoning up the shirt as quickly as possible. Since the collar was loose anyway, she buttoned it as well. The tail of the shirt hung down to her knees, yet she still felt incredibly vulnerable and exposed not having on underwear.

Lily casually walked around the room, examining random items. The latest gaming system sat on a shelf underneath the television. She could not imagine Light playing video games. The idea of him going ballistic, screaming and cursing, throwing the controller, basically losing his shit, over a game was unfathomable. She could, however, imagine him sitting at the desk, feverishly writing down the names of people in the Death Note to unleash his fury and frustration. A shiver ran through her body.

Strolling to his desk, Lily examined the few items on top. The small desk lamp covered with a rectangular green glass shade reminded her of the lamps in libraries. The cylindrical silver pencil cup held two pencils, a black pen, a blue pen, a fancy engraved silver pen, and a compass for geometry. A black and white composition book sat in the middle of the large green blotter. Two standard yellow pencils, a gold pen, and a silver pen were laid out in perfect parallel lines beside the notebook.

Lily flipped open the notebook. As she had expected, every page was blank in the run of the mill notebook. She half-heartedly pulled on the brass handle of the top left desk drawer. Inside, a plastic organizer held paper clips, binder clips, rubber bands, etc. The next drawer held a stapler, box of staples, a tape dispenser, and extra rolls of tape. She continued opening the drawers finding typical office supplies. No coils of thick rope or rolls of duct tape. That was comforting.

The last drawer she attempted to open was the top right drawer. It was the only one with a lock; a flat brass keyhole lock set into the wood. Of course it did not budge. Her fingers tightened around the shiny handle until her knuckles turned white. Although the locked drawer did appear to be a relatively self-evident hiding place, it was only a little less obvious than sandwiching the Death Note between the mattresses of his bed.

Personally, she would have used a hollowed out or false front book in which to conceal the Death Note. Ripping it apart to hide individual pages between those of several different books is also an option she would have employed. Did Light tear out pages and hide them in random places? What if he carried pages with him, just in case he needed to kill someone at in impromptu moment?

"Where could he be hiding the key?" she asked herself aloud.

"Try the pencil cup," suggested a raspy voice.

A glacial trickle of fear slid down her spine leaving behind a residual chill that made her quiver. The Shinigami stood behind her.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" he inquired, sounding genuinely curious.

Lily had been wondering where the Shinigami was hiding. She found him, or more aptly, he found her. How wonderful. Although her knees had turned to jelly, she forced herself to move, casually striding over to a bookcase to pretend to peruse the titles on the spines of the books.

"I am assuming you can appear at will, popping in and out of corporeal existence. I suppose you allow someone to see or hear you on your own whims," she stated rather than asked, pulling a book from the shelf.

"You are a very intelligent woman. You've also been given the gift of sight by your generous benefactor," he announced, his thin black lips stretching across his bluish gray face until he had a real ear-to-ear grin.

"You're not as dumb as you look," she commented keeping her back to him. Looking at the Shinigami was too unsettling. She needed to keep her wits rather than caving in to the fear holding her hostage, prompting her to run screaming from the room.

"You're not as sweet as you look either," he returned in an equally insulting manner. "Did you know your precious Crow is dying?"

"What do you mean?" she inquired, whirling around to glare at him. Her eyes met his blood red irises, holding his gaze without yielding to her aversion of the Shinigami's ghastly visage. Nausea, thick, hot, and greasy, oozed through her intestines. "How can he be dying?"

"After you murdered your uncle, you bled out like a slaughtered lamb. I watched you die. Yet here you stand. Alive and annoying," he added with a hissing chuckle. "How do you think that's possible?"

Lily could only stare at him, shocked into silence. The Shinigami was lying. He had to be. Although it would explain Crow's horribly weakened state.

"No gifts are free, Lily White, especially for the giver," Ryuk said, staring at her.

The dreadful death god using Okada's words shook her back to senses. She realized he was distracting her by playing with her emotions. Ryuk and Light made quite the scary pair. She could not allow either of them to make her veer off task and fail in completing her mission.

"Is the Death Note in that drawer?" she inquired, pointing at the locked drawer.

"Yes," he answered bluntly.

Lily blinked at him in disbelief. She could not be sure if he was telling her truth since he divulged an answer so easily. He seemed to sense her bewilderment and mistrust.

"I have no loyalties to Light Yagami. I am not his servant, and I am not his friend. Call me an interested observer in a human experiment. For some reason I find humans absolutely fascinating," he confessed.

"Is the key really in that pencil cup?" she asked, doubting his honesty before he could answer.

"Lily?" Light called from the hallway.

Ryuk vanished instantaneously. No flashy exits for the ethereal beings in her life.

"I'm in here!" she called, her heart hammering against her sternum.

"What are you...," he began speaking in the hallway,"...oh," he gasped, leering at her when he entered the room to see her wearing his shirt.

"I'm sorry. I hope you don't mind," she said, not caring if he did mind. She was not going to walk around in a towel despite the fact he would probably prefer the damp terry cloth getup. "I decided to help myself to your closet."

"My shirt looks good on you," he complimented, coming to stand in front of her.

Lily steeled herself for a provocative comment such as 'I can't wait to take it off of you' or possibly even a more salacious, 'I would look good on you too.' He said nothing; only gazed directly into her eyes, all the way through to her soul. His fingers brushed across her neck with a delicate, ticklish pressure.

When he stepped closer, close enough she could feel the heat of his skin radiating to her body, Lily noticed he was not wearing a shirt. His only attire consisted of a pair of black sleep pants. Were they silk? God, this man was incredibly decadent. To her dismay, her eyes were drawn to the line of hair that disappeared under the elastic waist band of the loose silk pants. Her line of sight followed the sparse hair up to his belly button where it ended. Soft lines demarcated the muscles of his belly implying firmness without giving the impression of untouchable hardness. The enticing peach tint to his smooth skin made her want to touch him, to determine for herself if his skin was as warm and soft as it looked.

 _Don't you dare,_ the inner voice chastised her. She could not be sure if was her own conscience or Itachi Okada inside her head scolding her.

"Are you hungry?" Light asked.

Lily forced her eyes upwards to his face to keep from staring at his naked chest. She nodded mutely.

"Then let's go eat," he said, taking her by the hand to lead her out of his room. "Were you talking to someone?"

Lily's belly tightened with apprehension. How much of her conversation with Ryuk had he heard?

"No. I wasn't talking to anyone," she lied. "I was reading the titles off of the books to myself as I looked at them."

"You always did love books," he stated flatly, walking down the stairs ahead of her without releasing her hand.

Lily paused at the foot of the stairs upon seeing the coffee table in the living room set for a romantic dinner for two complete with lit red tapers. Large bowls of steaming ramen sat on the table along with cups of tea. That was her favorite meal to order on study nights when they were in high school.

"It's pork. Your favorite. I got it from the restaurant you like," he said.

"Light," she whispered, emotion clutching her throat and choking her.

"I also got a movie for us to watch. Mary Poppins," Light added, pulling her over to the table.

Tears welled in her eyes. He remembered so many little things she did not think he had noticed back then. She wanted to scream at him in anger because all of these sweet little touches stabbed her in the heart like a dull, double edged knife. A tender emotion reminiscent of the love she once held for Light mitigated her rage, tempting her to fling herself into his arms and kiss him passionately. However, knowing either one of these intense emotional reactions would have been acceptable to him made her freeze up and do absolutely nothing. An impulsive, irrational response of some dramatic sort was exactly what he wanted, and she was not going to give it to him.

The living room filled with a blue white light. An exclamation of crackling thunder punctuated the air a few seconds later. She jumped, bumping face first into his chest. Her palm flattened to his soft skin over his heart. If it was possible, she would believe he had conjured up this storm as a way to get her out of her clothes and frighten her into his arms. The next step would be to comfort her - straight into his bed. He was pulling on all of her heartstrings to make her his puppet.

"Light," she whispered, barely restraining her runaway emotions. She had left the sleeping powder in her purse in his bedroom. "I left something upstairs. I'll be right back."

 _How in the hell am I going to get this into his food or drink or both? Definitely both_ , she thought, trying to walk at an unhurried pace. She wanted to run straight out of the front door to escape instead of making the turn to the left to go upstairs. The tap, tap, tap of raindrops on the windows reminded her she did not want to go outside either. Caught between Scylla and Charybdis, she had no choice but to stay with the evil in the living room.

Grabbing her purse from his bed, Lily hurried back downstairs to find the living room empty.

"Light?" she called. "Where are you?"

"I'm in the kitchen. Go ahead and start eating," he said.

Lily reached into her purse, feeling around for the bottle. Her fingertips touched the hard plastic and wrapped around the promise of saving herself from having unwanted sex with Light Yagami. Pulling out the bottle, she struggled to screw off the cap with her cold, numb fingers shaking with anxiety and fear. If he caught her, she had no clue what he might do to her. The lid came off with a pop, and she almost dropped the bottle.

Lily took a deep breath to steady her nerves, but it did nothing to steady her hand. She held the bottle over his bowl of ramen, and her quaking distributed the powder over the food. The white dust instantly dissolved into the broth. She moved the bottle over his cup of tea to add a little of the sedating concoction. After saying a quick prayer that the dose was enough to put him to sleep but not enough to kill him, she recapped the bottle, shoved it into her purse, and threw the handbag into the corner of the couch.

Lily sat down on her cushion, positioning herself in front of her food. It smelled good, making her mouth water. Picking up the chopsticks, she dug into the noodles.

Light reappeared in his half naked glory causing her to inhale a little too hard, inadvertently sucking the broth into her windpipe. Somehow she managed to swallow the noodles to avoid spitting them out when the convulsive coughing began.

"Are you okay?" Light asked, taking his seat across the table from her.

"Sure," she coughed, picking up her cup of tea to take a sip. The tea rid her of the remaining discomfort in her throat. She would never make a good spy. Her nerves could not handle it. The storm exerted its power again startling her.

"I'll see you through this storm safely. I promise you, I'll take care of you," he assured her, poking at his noodles with his chopsticks. "Let's eat. It's getting cold."

"Oh, my god, this is amazing," she mumbled through a second mouthful of noodles and not choking.

"Your table manners are still charming as ever," he laughed. "You never seemed afraid of just being yourself around me. You never pretended to be someone you're not. You can't hide anything from me anyway."

His last statement almost sounded like a warning, but her hunger pangs allowed her to overlook the threat. Famished because she had forgotten to eat all day, she crammed more noodles into her mouth. The broth warmed her from the inside out. For a few minutes, the food made her forget about the mass murderer sitting in front of her. She also did not notice that he was not eating or drinking.

When the bowl was empty, Lily leaned back against the couch behind her, rubbing her full, warm belly. She yawned, content and sleepy. Thunder rumbled and the house shook, but she was too relaxed to be on edge anymore.

"Ready to go upstairs and watch the movie?" Light asked, stacking her empty bowl on top of his full one as if to hide it.

"Sure," she agreed. She tried to stand and swooned, falling back down onto her rump.

 _What's happening to me?_ Lily asked herself pulling herself onto the couch. She felt Light's arm slid under her knees and his other arm enclosing her shoulders before he lifted her from the couch. Her tongue was thick and clumsy, preventing her from speaking.

"Don't worry, sweetheart," Light said as he carried her up the stairs. "I won't hurt you."

She did not believe him.

~~~\\\/~~~

Light pulled back the cover on his bed, laying her down on the crisp white sheet. He laid down beside her then spread the duvet over them from the waist down. Embracing her fully with both arms, he realized the one thing he had forgotten was how good it felt to hold her. He believed he could have been happy with her. They could have had a wonderful life together. He would have been Chief of Detectives just like dear old dad. Lily would have been a devoted wife and loving mother of their children, at least two, possibly even three or four children. They would have lived in a nice, quiet neighborhood, living their nice, quiet life. If only things could have been different...but they weren't. For several long minutes, he allowed himself to indulge in the nostalgic emotions of what might have been. Shaking off sentimentality, he lay her back on the pillow, looking into her eyes that were watery with tears.

"Don't cry," he whispered, kissing her lips. His fingers effortlessly unfastened the top three buttons of his shirt she was wearing. "This really does look good on you. The color suits you."

"L-Light," she slurred. Her viscid tongue became completely uncooperative when she tried to utter more words. Probably to beg him to stop.

"Shhh," he shushed her gently, giving her a hasty kiss. "Just sleep now. It will be all right."

Light peppered her face with tender kisses until her eyes closed. His objective was not to have sex with her. Sex would have to wait. When he finally made love her, he wanted her to want it, to beg for it. The idea of raping an unconscious woman sickened him. He had written the names of hundreds of rapists in the Death Note. Besides, he did not want to lower himself to acting like the same kind of beast as her uncle.

Rolling onto his back, Light positioned the upper part of her body halfway on top of his bare torso. Her head lolled into the crook of his neck. Goosebumps raised on his tingling skin where her lips grazed the throbbing artery pumping blood hard and fast through his body.

Light picked up his phone. He raised the device above them with the camera on, moving it around until he found the angle that provided the most compromising illusion. He appeared to be naked and her shirt had separated revealing a generous portion of her cleavage. Her messy hair and reddened cheeks gave the impression a bona fide roll in the sack had taken place. He attached the picture to a text to send to L.

Light [23:54]: _Lily will be staying with me._

Light left the statement open to L's own interpretation of exactly how long she would be staying with him. For the night? A week? Forever? L could damn well think whatever he wanted to think. If Light had his way, Lily would stay beside him permanently.

He had to tread carefully while navigating the treacherous waters of trying to win back Lily. He could not risk breaking Misa's obsessive stalker heart. In a fit of jealous rage, she would write Lily's name in her Death Note. Consequences be damned, he would kill her with his bare hands if she dared to hurt Lily.

Light needed to figure out a way to get rid of Misa. Soon. Mostly before she did something stupid that would result in them both getting caught by the great dessert addicted detective.

Hideki (L) [23:59]: _Things are not always as they appear. You're my best friend so I trust you._

 _Is he being serious? He trusts me? I have his girlfriend in my bed, half naked, and he trusts me?,_ Light thought _. Or do you not care about her at all, you bastard?_

"Hmph," Light snorted derisively. "Best friend? To save your life, you better not trust me."

Hideki [00:02]: _By the way, I will meet you at the university tomorrow, near the library. There's something I need to discuss with you._

"Ugh," Light groaned. That statement filled him with more horror and dread than Misa telling him they needed to talk.

Light did not reply. Turning off his phone, he put it on the bedside table. He pulled Lily close, kissing her forehead, the tip of her nose, finally her lips. She moaned and stirred, putting her arm across his waist in an affectionate gesture. He smiled. Even in her sleep she wanted him. He knew she had been lying to him, and herself, this whole time. She still loved him.

"Don't worry, my love. I'll get rid of our two problems somehow," he promised, kissing her lips once more. "Then we'll be together. A king and his queen. A god and his goddess."

"I love you, L," she mumbled in her sleep.

Light felt dizzy when his blood pressure sky rocketed in seconds.

 _Goddamn you, L. You are going to die._


	35. The Painful Truth

An annoying ringing sound like the jingling of an old-fashioned telephone woke Lily up. Her head ached, and she found it quite difficult to shake off the disorientation of sleep. Her hand patted the bed in search of the source of the noise ripping apart her brain. The irritating device was tucked under the edge of her pillow. Without opening her eyes, she pressed the screen on her phone hoping she pushed the right button to answer.

"Hello?" she croaked. Her throat was so dry the sides felt stuck together. She could barely swallow.

"Lily? Where are you?" L asked, his voice tight and raised a few octaves higher than normal.

Hampered by her sleep addled brain, she could not determine if he was worried or angry. _Where are you?_ Why would he ask such a weird question? She was where she should be. In her bed at - oh, wait.

"Oh, no," she gasped, her eyes popping open. She stared at a beige tray ceiling above her rather than a white flat one. Sitting bolt upright, scanning her surroundings she saw bookcases, a desk, and below her, a twin bed. Definitely not her bed. Light's room! "Oh, no!"

No Shinigami in sight. Lucky for her. At this point, seeing Ryuk might have scared her to death instead of requiring him writing her name down in his Death Note. Since he was a death god she assumed he owned a notebook of his own in addition to the one in Light's possession. How many of those damn things existed here in their world?

"Are you all right?!" L exclaimed, clearly agitated.

She had never heard him raise his voice before. He had probably only yelled to get her attention since she had spaced out. Her head felt like it might explode.

"I don't know," she mumbled, rubbing her pounding temple with the heel of her hand.

What else happened last night? Panic gripped her as an alarming train of thoughts chugged through her brain. Her hand patted down her upper torso. The shirt was still on and buttoned up. The blue duvet had gotten wrapped tightly around her from the waist down. She did not feel like she had been physically violated. Only emotionally defiled.

"Lily? Are you okay?" L repeated slowly, enunciating each syllable as if she had not understood the question the first time.

"I'm fine. I'm at Light's house. I guess I fell asleep last night. I'm sorry if I made you worry -"

"I wasn't worried," he interrupted curtly. Without waiting for her to say anything else, he continued speaking, "I want you to stay where you are."

"Stay here? At Light's house?" she questioned him skeptically. Was he punishing her? Did something happen she did not know about?

"That's where you are, right?" he rejoined sarcastically. "I need you to listen to me without interrupting."

 _Wow, okay_ , she thought, stung by his abruptness.

His behavior was bizarre even for him because it was so NOT like him. L seemed angry and definitely distressed. He could not possibly be more upset than her by her predicament. She had been held hostage by the weather and drugged. Light had turned the tables on her and gotten to her first. Devious bastard.

"I want you to stay there. You probably don't believe this, but it is the best place for you to be right now."

No, she did not believe it.

"I'm meeting Light at the To Oh campus this morning. Something big is happening."

That statement she believed wholeheartedly. Lily stayed silent in case he was not finished speaking. She did not want to be chastised like a child again.

"Lily?"

"Will you at least tell me what's going on?" she inquired, keeping her voice as calm as possible. Fear held her in its glacial hand. "L, please? I think I need to know."

"I won't tell you exactly what's happened, however, I will tell you this..." He paused, inhaling deeply. "I am now officially making Light my number one suspect. I am ninety percent sure he is Kira."

"Oh, my god," she breathed.

Lily wanted to be relieved L finally believed Light to be Kira. However, informing Light of his change of heart would only put L in more danger. She needed to find the Death Note. They needed an ace up their sleeves. If only she had a few hours to look around. Her eyes danced over to the desk. Or maybe thirty minutes would do.

There were a few new things sitting on the desk, one of them being her purse. Lily could barely see, her vision blurry. Thank goodness her glasses also sat on the corner of the blotter. After unwrapping herself from the cover, she retrieved them so she could see.

Light had also left a bottle of water for her. Gee, how thoughtful of him. It was the least he could do after drugging her. The absolute very least. Asshole.

In the middle of the desk, on top of the blank composition book, sat the pill bottle from her purse with a piece of paper underneath. Her heart felt like it shriveled up and died. Apparently while he was searching for her phone, he had rifled through the entire contents of her purse.

"Shit," she muttered under her breath. L was still talking, but she had not been listening. "L, before you tell Light - "

"I want you to start packing Light's things," L interrupted her.

"But L - " She tried to speak again. Ignoring her, he kept on going.

"Watari will be by this afternoon to pick the two of you up. Light is moving into the hotel. So are the members of the Japanese Task Force," he explained to her, giving her a broad overview of his plans. Finally, renting an entire floor of suites made sense. "The investigation has reached a critical point. I need you to handle Light for me. Can you do that?"

"Of course, I can," she sighed, giving up on trying to argue with him. He had his mind made up for how this investigation would proceed. She had no choice but to follow _his_ plan. "That's what you hired me to do, right? It's my job to deal with Light."

"Good girl," he complimented her, making her feel like an obedient dog. "I'll see you this evening."

A beep announced the end of the call. Lily lowered the phone from her ear to stare at it as if it was a live snake that had bitten her. He did not even say good-bye. Her eyes scooted back over to the desk. She saw the incriminating medication bottle with the note under it.

"Damn," she murmured.

Lily sat down in the desk chair before sliding the note from under the bottle to read it. _We will talk about this later._ She had every intention of talking about this later. He had drugged her first so how dare he be perturbed with her when he had beat her at her own game.

A hoarse cackle emanated from the corner of the room seconds before the lanky scarecrow like Shinigami appeared.

"Well, well, tricky minx. Looks like you've been caught," he rasped, his thin black lips stretching from one ear to the other across his bluish gray face.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Lily grumbled. "Shouldn't you be up Light's ass where ever the hell he is?"

"You really are something, you know that?" he chuckled in dark amusement.

"So I've been told," she dryly returned.

"No wonder Light can't get you out of his head. You look so sweet but you're a devil in disguise. You're not much different than him, you know."

After last night's little game of who can drug who first, she realized they thought a little too much alike. This realization left her feeling incredibly ill at ease. But how did Light know she planned to dose him with meds? Her eyes flew to the Shinigami.

"You," she barked, hopping to her feet and stomping toward him.

"What?" he uttered in a 'who me?' manner, backing away from the enraged woman.

"This is all your fault," she accused. "You told him! You told Light I was going to drug him because you found the bottle in my purse when I left it up here!"

"I only wanted to make things more interesting. I never expected Light to fight fire with fire by dosing you with Rohypnol. He's quite ruthless," Ryuk said as if it she had no idea of Light's malevolent nature.

"This is all your fault. All of of it!" she screamed, making a sweeping gesture with her arm. The Shinigami jumped back from her as if expecting to be slapped. He certainly would deserve it, but she harbored serious qualms about touching him.

"This is hardly my responsibility. I just dropped the notebook. Any random human could have found it, but he did. You're darling Light acted all on his own with no prompting from me. Besides, if it weren't for me. He never would have taken an interest in you," he noted maliciously.

"Hmmmm," she hummed, considering the validity of his statement. "The saddest part about that is you're probably right."

Lily went back to the desk to sit down in the chair. The energy imparted to her by her burst of rage ebbed away leaving her weak and unsteady on her feet. She reached for her purse, her fingertips brushing the pencil cup. The cup fell over pouring its contents onto the desk. When she picked up the cup to correct it, a hollow clanking sound occurred like there was something in the bottom. Looking inside, she saw nothing. Shaking the cup, she heard the soft thump of an object inside, the slight shift in weight in her hand. Last night during her search Ryuk had told her to check the pencil cup for the key.

"Hey," Ryuk asked, suddenly nervous. "Hey! What are you doing?"

"I'm doing what I came here to do," she said, gritting her teeth with the effort to twist off the bottom of the cup. "Besides, you told me where to find what I needed."

Lily paused when she realized the Shinigami had fallen quiet. A glimpse in his direction revealed that he had been stunned into silence, his massive maw hanging open. The rows of sharp pointed teeth made him look like an Angler Fish.

"Not laughing now are you?" she spat at him snidely.

The false bottom of the cylinder budged then released with a small pop, twisting off to reveal a small brass key. She dumped the key into her hand then turned to look at the Shinigami observing her every move.

"You're not going to try to stop me?"

"Why should I? I told you to see what you would do. I find your actions compelling. You're exceedingly entertaining. More so than Light. He can be a real stick in the mud." He issued one of his throaty evil cackles that she had already become accustomed to hearing. "I'm breathless with anticipation as to what you'll do next."

"Hmph," she snorted at him, turning her attention to the brass lock on the drawer.

Lily held her breath as she inserted the key into the lock. Every nerve in her body stood on end when she turned the key. The low click startled her. She had halfway expected a fiery explosion. Her trembling fingers gripped the brass handle and pulled opened the drawer. Inside lay a black notebook but not the one she was looking for. A plain, run-of-the-mill, black and white composition book with the word Diary on the cover. The single word had been hand written with the perfection of a computer printer. It was the only thing in the drawer.

Lily chewed her lower lip. The Death Note has to be in here. It just has to be! She reached inside to pick up the Diary. Her fingernail scratched across the wood bottom which sounded strangely hollow. A few splinters gathered under her nail. Such soft wood would not be a good supportive bottom for a drawer. It had to be a false bottom.

She put the diary in her purse to read later for her own investigative purposes. If it really was his diary, which she doubted, it might prove to be a fascinating read. Her fingers moved across the bottom of the drawer, carefully pushing and testing. When the Shinigami came closer, she stopped abruptly, staring up at him.

"I have no loyalties, however, if you get yourself killed that won't be fun at all," Ryuk said, reaching for one of the pens on the desk. He picked it up and handed it to her. "You'll need this to keep the booby trap from detonating and blowing you to pieces."

Ryuk pointed to the underside of the drawer and told her what to do to disarm the device.

"Thank you," she responded, dropping to her knees to look under the drawer. She inserted the pen into the hole while pushing on a corner of the piece of wood from the top to make it pop up.

"You're almost as smart as Light!" he exclaimed, clapping his hands excitedly as she removed the piece of wood. "If it weren't for me, you'd be dead."

"Thank you, I guess," she murmured, setting the flimsy wooden rectangle on top of the desk.

There it is. The notebook responsible for killing thousands. She stared in awe. Her eyes traced the silver block letters spelling out Death Note.

"Oh, my god. I can't believe it's real." She glanced at the Shinigami. "What happens if I touch it?"

"Nothing because you can already see me. If you steal it, it will become yours," he said as if tempting her with an offer she could not refuse.

Lily did not want it. But she needed to see if this thing was for real. Picking it up, she took a deep breath and opened it. No turning back. She thumbed through page after page of names. Each one had been written using that same laser precise penmanship she had seen many times before in Light's handwritten notes in school.

The filled pages seemed endless. He had written so many names. Such a benign thing usually, but in this notebook, the simple pen strokes invoked a death sentence. Pertaining to the Death Note, the pen truly is mightier than the sword.

Sitting cross legged in the middle of the bed, Lily picked up her phone. Confirmation would be needed to break the last tenuous thread of hope, the hope that Light was not Kira. She had no idea that tiny sliver of hope existed until coming face to page with the truth. She opened her web search page and began typing in names. Many of the names returned links to articles about the Kira murders where they were named as victims.. Others brought a simple deceased notice from public records without divulging details of any sort.

Her chest constricted, threatening to squeeze her heart until it popped. The excruciating pain was only her heart breaking.

Two of the names, Raye Penber and Naomi Misora, returned obituaries but no official records. She quickly found out why by reading the obits. Both of these people were FBI agents from America. Their lives were no longer in danger by revealing their vocation. The worst had already happened to them - they were dead.

These two people were engaged to be married. They both died in Japan. Raye had died of a heart attack. Naomi of 'apparent suicide.' And the not so apparent cause of heart attack due to the Death Note.

"What the fuck, Light?" she moaned mournfully, tears stinging the backs of her eyeballs. "How could you do this?"

Lily searched for several of the names in the vicinity of those two. Mixed among random criminals she found the names of twelve other American FBI agents who were murdered as well. A sick feeling swelled in the pit of her stomach. These agents must have been working with L and were close to discovering Light was Kira.

"Oh, my god," she mumbled, holding her aching head in her hands. She rocked back and forth, trying to find comfort from the devastating truth. Finding none, she wanted to scream to assuage her anger and frustration. "These were the good guys, and he killed them. He killed them to save himself."

Lily could not handle any more. Closing the Death Note, she stood up to slip the notebook into her purse. She wished she had a better hiding place, but at the moment she did not even have her clothes. What did Light do with her clothes? Speaking of clothes, L asked, or rather ordered, her to pack Light's things.

Lily discovered a matching set of brown leather luggage in the back of the closet behind the clothes. Of course he owned a matching set of expensive luggage. She sat the suitcases on the floor, unzipping and opening them. Grabbing clothes by the armfuls, hangers and all, she dumped them into the largest suitcase, not caring if she wrinkled his clothes. She emptied out his closet except for the suits and ties and fancy clothes. He would not need those. Next she commenced to emptying drawers of underwear, socks, and other essentials, into the other suitcase. She was too angry to feel weird about touching his unmentionables.

Lily sat down on the smaller suitcase to be able to zip it shut. The zipper made a screeing sound grating on her nerves.

"Lily!" Light's voice echoed up the staircase.

Done just in the nick of time. Her heart beat faster with each of his footfalls up the stairs. The infamous murderer Kira, had arrived and he was coming to get her.

"Oh, god," she gasped when the doorknob turned. She stood at the end of the bed, the suitcases at her feet, unable to move. There was nowhere to run anyway. She was trapped.

"Li - " Her name died away on his lips when he opened the door. "What the hell have you been doing?"

Light's brown eyes were cold and unyielding like hard packed earth after a freeze in the winter. Lily shivered under the sheer physical intensity of his penetrating glower.

"What have you been doing?" he repeated through his clenched teeth.

"You're Kira, Light," she stated bluntly. The tremor in her belly increased until her entire body visibly shook.

"What are you talking about?" he scoffed.

The corners of his mouth lifted then quickly turned downward. He could not even fake a smile. Evidently he picked up on the fact she knew, without a doubt, he was Kira and there was no point in refuting her statement.

"OH MY GOD! How could you be Kira?!" she shrieked, springing at him.

Pulling back her arm, she unleashed a scorching slap across his cheek. She struck him with enough force to send him reeling backwards, almost knocking him onto his behind. Three bloody scratches appeared in the middle of her hand print marring his otherwise flawless cheek. The rest of his face turned the same shade of red as his blood.

Light is Kira. Uncovering the irrefutable proof of Light's well kept secret for herself, destroyed her. Lily understood too late why L allowed himself to remain in denial. Declining suspicion was comfortable and emotionally safe. No longer could she ignore the incontrovertible evidence to tread the waters of denial and reject any misgivings as paranoia. Neither could L. He would be hurt just as much as her.

Lily closed her eyes freeing the tears from the dam of her eyelids. Her entire body tingled and a static hum filled her head. If she fainted, so be it. Losing consciousness would be a welcome relief to give her tortured mind and adrenaline riddled body a break.

"Lily," Light murmured, touching her shoulder.

"Don't touch me," she mumbled, unable to flinch away from him. Too weary to move or scream, she stood still anticipating a black out. But it did not come. Dammit. Sometimes the universe could be needlessly cruel.

"Lily," Light cooed, stroking her arm. He acted as if he were trying to soothe an injured, frightened animal.

Lily emitted a soft whimper instead of the plaintive sob she was holding back. Tears ran down her cheeks, dripped from her chin.

"So what happens now?"

~~~\\\/~~~

"I -I d-don't know," Light stammered. Not one single answer came to his mind in response to her simple question. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I wanted to tell you my secret so many times. I wanted you to know so you could be with me...to help me."

"Help you?" she questioned him, her eyes opened to meet his.

Light stood still and quiet, unsure of what to do or say. For once he did not have all the answers. No plan weaved its way into his analytical mind to prepare him a way out of this situation. He detested feeling helpless and confused.

He stared at the resolute yet broken woman standing in front of him. She had ambushed him leaving him no recourse. The man with the plan was out of ideas because Lily had a talent for inadvertently counteracting his best laid plans. However, this time, she had done everything intentionally. He no longer knew what Lily was truly capable of. Apparently, she had found the Death Note and done so without setting off his booby trap. Congratulations and condolences all at once, Lily White.

Being unable to predict her actions made him vulnerable. Of all the people to make him defenseless, he never would have guessed that person would be her. But of course, it had to be her. Lily, Sachiko, whatever her name, he had made a critical error by actually loving her, allowing himself to be at her mercy. Damn her anyway.

"How could you do this?" she whispered, leaving her tears unchecked.

"Oh, come on, Lily. We've had this conversation before," he murmured gently, yanking a handkerchief from his pocket. When he raised the cloth to wipe her face, she did not wince away from him. She was not afraid of him.

 _No longer a scaredy cat, huh?_ Light was not sure if this change was good or bad. Fear was an inborn instinct meant to keep us alive. A sad smile tugged at his lips. Considering the circumstances, she should be afraid. Very afraid.

"The last time we had this conversation I did not know you were Kira," she countered.

"Would it have mattered?" he shot back, growing impatient.

"You're right," she agreed, hanging her head as if in shame.

"I know I'm right," he proclaimed.

Once again feeling confident he had the upper hand, Light took her into his arms, kissing her forehead. He held her shivering body close to his. Lowering his head, he kissed her slightly parted lips. They were cold. His lips stayed on hers to warm them. His body pressed into hers to share his body heat with her.

Light could not help but smile when her arms enclosed his waist, and she kissed him back. A tentative, shy kiss. Unsure and tender, demanding nothing, expecting nothing. He found it positively intoxicating. His hand slid up her side, molding itself to the curve of her breast. Instead of jerking away from him, she pushed her body harder into his, her lips pressing more firmly to his. Once again, not the reaction he expected. His lips slid from hers, grazing her cheek before kissing her earlobe.

"I'll overlook the fact that you tried to drug me," he whispered into her ear.

"I'll try not to be offended by that considering you got to me first," she snapped but continued to hold on to him. Her hand went to his hair, her fingers stroking through it as if petting him. He liked it.

"Don't like being beat at your own game?" he teased, nipping at her earlobe.

"Is this all a game to you? You're killing people, Light. And not all of them deserve it."

Light stood up straight, extending himself to his full height so he could look down on her although she was nearly as tall as him. Despite the tears still leaking from her eyes, she looked strong, unafraid. Angry.

"They all deserved it for one reason or another," he said, staring directly into her eyes.

"I suppose so. Those FBI agents would have ended your killing spree. Your out of control rampage for justice. Isn't that right?"

"You're right. They were getting in my way," he confirmed. "This is definitely no longer a game."

His hand on her breast flexed, massaging it gently. There was no reason to hold back any longer. The time for subtle deceit had passed. He did not need to rely on seduction to woe her either.

"Will you be mine?"

"Will you kill me if I say no?" Lily asked, averting her eyes from his.

"No. I would never kill you," he replied truthfully. He would not write her name down in his Death Note if that was what she was asking. He could not, however, be responsible for what the jealous Misa Amane would do.

"What do you want from me?" she asked, dropping her arms from his body.

At least she understood the precarious position she had gotten herself into. "I already told you."

"You can't be serious," she scoffed in disbelief. "Why would I ever want to be with you?"

"It just makes sense for us to be together, don't you think? Neither one of us can escape this situation," he said, tracing the curve of her cheek and jaw with his forefinger. "We are inextricably bound together, you and I."

"How do you figure? Why would I agree to this? I am with L. I love him. Do you really think you can force me into a relationship with you? From where I stand, it seems like I'm the one who wields the power here. I know about the Death Note. I will tell L and end you."

Light had never been one to commit any act of physical violence against a woman. In this moment, he was willing to make an exception. She was correct in her assertion, but he could not and would not let her know that.

Light walked away from her to stand in front of the window to look outside. His suitcases were packed and waiting just as L said they would be. At any minute, the limousine should be pulling up to whisk them away to the hotel.

L had asked him to join the investigation. Of course, he had quickly agreed. This turn of events was unexpected but convenient. Light would have unlimited access to everything that belonged to L - including Lily.

Then, the investigator informed him of Misa Amane's impending arrest for suspicion of being the second Kira. That damn idiot. Light knew she would do something stupid to get caught. Hopefully, she would not drag him down with her. Misa had been taken into custody by L's cohorts before their conversation had ended. She was locked up somewhere at the hotel rather than in a holding cell at the police station. That would be a severe complication.

"Did you know that L has Misa under house arrest?" Light questioned her without turning around.

Her sudden intake of air told him that she did not know. So L did not tell her everything after all? This was good to know. When she did not say anything, he continued speaking.

"He believes she is the second Kira."

"Second Kira?"

 _Oh, this is fantastic!,_ Light thought triumphantly. Events had taken another turn this afternoon and were going his way once more. He felt positively giddy with the knowledge of her ignorance of the situation in its entirety. This would definitely work in his favor.

"This will give us a chance to get close. Like we used to be," he said, pushing her boundaries.

"Light, I don't think that is a good idea," she argued weakly.

"We will have to be careful of course," he said. "Misa has a Death Note of her own. She loves me and hates anyone who she thinks might take me away from her. I don't know what she would do to you."

"She's your girlfriend?" Lily did not sound envious, only surprised.

"Only in her mind," he returned, turning to look at Lily. "I don't think L would take too kindly to us having an affair right under his nose either. I found out last night the relationship between you two was not a ruse. At least not for you. It would hurt my heart to know you were as deluded as poor little Misa."

"I'm not afraid of her killing me. At this point, it would be preferable. I just can't believe you're stooping so low as to blackmail me into a relationship with you. I mean, honestly Light, isn't this way beneath you?"

"Men have been known to do the most heinous, inconceivable things for love."

"Love," she sneered, turning away from him.

"I won't write L's name down in the Death Note," Light promised.

Suddenly, Light had her undivided attention. Whirling around, her huge, round eyes looked a lot like L's when they settled on his face. The color drained from her skin giving her a washed out, half dead appearance, becoming a mere ghost of herself.

Light smiled; a sinister, cocky smile. Naturally her weakness had to be L. Setting aside his jealous ire, he focused on the fact that he possessed the leverage he needed to control her.

"You goddamn bastard," she hissed, sounding like a demon. "I hope there's a special place in hell for you."

"Hmph," he snorted derisively, crossing the room to her. "I will be going to neither heaven nor hell when I die. I'm a god. I'll never truly die."

"You're crazy," Lily snarled, her top lip sliding back from her teeth. She appeared to be disgusted by him. "I hate you."

Light barely controlled the urge to slap her. He would be returning her favor from earlier and assuaging a bit of his own frustration with her. Standing in front of her, he ran his thumb over her lips then kissed her.

"Oh, that mouth of yours. You can whisper words of honey or say things that will destroy a person's soul. Sometimes I think you're a much bigger monster than you think I am. Words have the power to kill. Don't you know that?"

"Oh, yeah. I know that."

Her strong steely gaze showed her blatant opposition to the plans he had in mind for her. Light adored her feisty nature. Although submission had its place in women like Misa, making them a tool to be used, he wanted the woman he loved to have a mind of her own even if she defied him at every turn. He needed to be challenged, both mentally and emotionally, for a woman to hold his interest. She also had an irritating way of reminding him he still had a human side.

"I'll do whatever you want me to do, Light. Please don't write L's name in the Death Note. I love him," she said.

Hearing her proclaim her love for L made him ill. The strawberry shortcake he had eaten with L in the cafeteria after lunch started to creep back up his esophagus.

"I know you love him," he huffed.

Although her words did not match the defiance displayed in her eyes, Light did not doubt she would do anything to save her precious L. He had her where he wanted her. He would not break her rebellious spirit, but he would push her to the limit.


	36. Serious as a Heart Attack

"May I please have my clothes?" Lily requested, backing away from Light.

Light gave her a slow, libidinous visual examination. His eyes traveled the length of her body, giving her long legs exposed beneath the tail of his shirt extra attention.

"Such a waste of a good opportunity." He clicked his tongue, shaking his head. "However, I suppose it would be advisable for you to be dressed when that annoying chauffeur gets here."

 _That man is much more than a chauffeur_ , Lily wanted to correct him. She stayed quiet, waiting for him to leave. Once she believed him to have vacated the second floor, she ran to the bedroom door to check the hall to be sure. Coast clear, she crossed the hall to the bathroom, closing the door behind her and locking it. Turning on the shower tempted her to get in to wash off how dirty she felt after being violated with a look.

Lily tossed her purse onto the counter by the sink, pulling out the notebook and her phone. Finding the page listing the FBI agents names, she took a picture. After capturing photos of a few other pages of names, she included a snapshot of the front cover and the list of rules inside to send them to L. Two seconds after pressing the green call button on her phone screen, she tapped her foot nervously, impatient to hear his voice.

"Lily? I'm kind of in the middle of some- "

"L, I need you to shut up and listen," she interrupted him. This time she would not allow him to put her off. He needed to hear her out. "I've got your harpoon, Captain Ahab. I just sent you a few pictures."

Lily paused, allowing L a minute or two to look at the photos. The short span of time felt like an eternity to her.

"It looks like names written in a notebook," he said sounding confused and a tad annoyed. "Are you sure Light wasn't conducting his own investigation? Making a list of names to keep up with the criminals killed, to cross reference at a later date?"

"I'm sure it's not an investigator's notes. It's a hit list of the people he murdered. Compare names, dates, circumstances...there's a few where the exact cause of death is listed in detail," she informed him. "I've got his diary as well for you to compare the handwriting if you still don't believe Light wrote it."

"Lily - "

"It's not just any notebook," she prattled, her voice rising, giving her a slightly hysterical sound. "It's called a Death Note. This notebook is how Light has been killing people. There's even rules written inside the cover," she continued, her voice breaking with emotion. There was too much silence on the other end of her call. She was desperate for him to believe. "Misa has a Death Note as well. Did your investigators find it among her belongings?"

"How did you - "

"Light told me she was arrested. You have to find her notebook so you, and your investigators, will be safe."

"Watari will be there soon," he declared, his voice toneless as ever. He acted as if he had not heard a word she had said.

"All right," she sighed. She could not help but wonder if he thought she was crazy and dismissed her words as a madwoman's drivel.

 _Stay calm. He heard you, and he believes you. He has a reason for acting like this. He always has a reason for everything he does - or doesn't do,_ Lily reminded herself before she could slide headfirst into full blown delirium.

"Lily?" L called.

Her body tensed. She was afraid she had spaced out again and missed something important.

"Yeah?"

"Be careful. If Light knows that you know, you are in danger," he warned her.

 _Oh, Light knows I know._ Closing her eyes, she exhaled in relief _. L believes me._

"L, if anything happens to me, Light or Misa is responsible."

"I understand. I'll see you soon."

Lily waited to hear the click and beep of him ending the call. When it did not come, she said, "L, I love you."

"Yeah, I know," he responded. "Come back to me safely."

"Lily?" Light called, knocking softly on the bathroom door.

Lily ended the call and shoved the phone along with the notebook into her purse. Throwing off the shirt, she hurried into the shower.

"I'll be out in a minute!"

"I'll leave your clothes by the door. Watari is here. We'll be getting my suitcases down to the car," he told her.

"Oh, thank god," she murmured, shutting off the water. Surely Light would not try something stupid since Watari was present.

After toweling off swiftly, Lily opened the door a crack to scout the hall for the presence of men. Upon seeing no one, she opened the door a little wider to seize the neatly folded pile of her freshly laundered clothing. Once dressed she ran downstairs, passing Light and Watari who were standing at the front door waiting for her.

On the way to the car, her eyes scanned the yard and sidewalk in hopes of finding her shoes. Unfortunately, the storm had washed them away. Oh well. Considering they were the only casualty of last night, she was not too upset by losing them.

Light opened the back door of the limousine for her. Regrettably for him, his chivalry was unceremoniously shunned when she opened the front door for herself and sat down in the passenger's seat.

"Sir, If you will," Watari proclaimed, holding the door and motioning for Light to get into the backseat by himself.

When they were about ten minutes into the drive back to the hotel, Lily tapped on the glass divider behind the front seat separating them from the back seat.

"Is this soundproof?" she asked.

"Yes, Miss," Watari answered. "I would caution you not to tap on the glass. It could upset the animal inside the enclosure."

Lily nearly missed the dry sarcastic British wit delivered in a voice as devoid of emotion as L's. She smiled but could not allow herself to laugh all things considered.

"You know what's going on?" she questioned him, holding onto her purse containing the ever so important notebook.

"Not the specific facts, but I am privy to the crucial details," he replied vaguely. "Miss, I should warn you that Detective Yagami and Aizawa are part of the investigative team and they will be present at the hotel. They have been made aware of your involvement in the case."

"I suppose that's good. No uncomfortable surprise reunions for anyone involved," she murmured, glimpsing out of the window.

Her fingers twiddled with the zipper on her purse. She carried the power of life and death with her. Death had come to all of those whose names had been written inside. Once this notebook was turned over to L, no more lives would be taken. At least not by using this notebook. Hopefully, the officers had found Misa's Death Note when collecting evidence from her apartment. But there were two more notebooks, and the Death gods who owned them. What did Misa's Shinigami look like?

Lily inhaled sharply unaware that she had been holding her breath. The penetrating cold of fear trickled down her back like ice cubes tossed down her shirt, permeating her body and soaking straight into her veins to chill her through and through.

"The hard part is over, Miss," Watari said as if he could sense her apprehension.

Lily gave him a smile on quivering lips. She believed the hard part had not yet begun.

~~~\\\/~~~

"Chief Yagami, I strongly advise against your presence here," L announced as they waited in the garage for the arrival of the limousine.

"Until I see unequivocal evidence for myself, I will continue to believe in my son's innocence," Soichiro Yagami stubbornly argued.

"But Chief, you saw the pictures of the notebook, the names," countered Touta Matsuda. The rookie detective acted like a rookie adult who did not to know when to be quiet.

"Shut up, Matsuda," growled Detective Aizawa, his eyebrows separating into two from the troubled unibrow over his nose.

The other three detectives, Kanzo Mogi, Hideki Ide, and Hirokazu Ukita remained silent in the name of self-preservation and common sense. They stood at attention when the black Rolls Royce glided to a stop in front of them.

Detective Aizawa opened the door for Light to get out. The young man cautiously unfolded from the backseat of the car, glancing at each of them. His brown eyes registered bewilderment, then fear before becoming blank brown canvases registering no emotion at all.

"Dad, what's going on?" Light asked, catching his Father's eyes.

Soichiro Yagami turned his back to avoid having to watch what happened next.

"Light Yagami, you're under arrest for murder," L revealed. "You are Kira."

"What?" he scoffed in return. He stepped back as if he were going to sit back down in the car or possibly turn and run.

The big wall of a man named Kanzo Mogi stepped to his right to close the gap between himself and the car that could be a possible escape route for Light. Although smaller built, the pencil thin Hideki Ide and the short Hirokazu Ukita appeared no less menacing especially considering the expressions of anger pinching their already strained faces. They flanked Shuichi Aizawa who stepped forward with a pair of handcuffs in his hand.

"Wh-what is th-this?" Light stammered, his eyes bouncing from face to face on the men surrounding him.

"Light Yagami, you're under arrest," Detective Aizawa reiterated, gripping Light's wrist so he could put the handcuffs on him.

"Dad! Why aren't you stopping this?!" Light exclaimed, pulling his wrist away from the detective. "This isn't funny!"

The other three detectives immediately drew their guns, aiming them at Light's head.

"Son, this is no joke. I suggest you come along without resisting," Soichiro Yagami advised him, keeping his back to his son. He visibly flinched when the handcuffs were snapped onto Light's wrists.

"You are wrong," Light disputed hotly, scowling furiously at L. "I am not Kira."

"I am _never_ wrong, Light Yagami."

~~~\\\/~~~

"Are you okay?" L asked Lily, opening the car door for her.

Lily took his offered hand, allowing him to pull her out of the car. She did not trust her jellied knees to hold her upright at this moment. Falling forward, leaning heavily into his body, she put her arms around his slim waist while his arms encompassed her shoulders.

"I'm so glad you're all right," she sighed, embracing him.

"Did you do anything last night we'll both regret?" L questioned her in a sedate manner.

Lily pulled back from him causing his arms to loosen from around her but he would not allow them to fall away from her sides completely.

"Are you asking me if I had sex with Light?" she inquired, annoyed but not surprised by his blunt question. When he neither confirmed no denied his meaning, she answered, "No. Nothing happened."

"I didn't think so. He only wanted me to think so," he murmured, gathering her into his arms to hug her.

"What?"

Lily was momentarily stunned by his unsolicited show of affection toward her. She sank into the warmth of his embrace, burying her face into the folds of his t-shirt.

"So you have the evidence?" he asked her in a businesslike tone without letting her go.

"It's in my bag," she replied wishing she could stay in his arms. If only this investigation, all of the madness, could be paused, just for an hour, so she could take comfort in his arms uninterrupted with no distractions.

"Although the notebook is hard evidence, this case will require further investigation to bring it to a conclusion."

"What are you saying?" She leaned her head back so she could see his face.

"This is not over yet." His dark eyes met hers. Serious, detached emotionally, he was all private investigator at the moment.

A heavy boulder of uneasiness formed in the depths of her belly. She already knew that this case was not exactly, but almost, wrapped up. Hearing it out loud made that fact even more worrisome and ominous. Her arms unwound from his body, and she stepped back from him.

"We need to talk," L stated solemnly, brushing his fingertips across her cheek in a gesture to offer her comfort. "But not now. When we get upstairs, I need you to go straight to your room so I can speak with the members of the Task Force."

"I understand," she responded, The gravity of the situation kept her rebellious tongue still without reacting to his authoritative tone that made him sound as if he was issuing orders to an underling.

"Let's go to the suite," he said, keeping his arm around her shoulders as he led her to the service elevator.

Lily did not realize the only people left in the parking garage were herself and L. Watari had pulled the car away upon her exit and gone upstairs to help the officers who had vacated the scene to deal with the incredibly uncomfortable situation of Light's arrest while in the presence of his father.

They did not speak on the elevator ride up to their floor. There was too much too say in such a short amount of time so they said nothing at all. L held her hand as they walked into the room to find the six men of the investigative team and Watari waiting for them in the sitting area.

"I'll see you later," Lily murmured, rising on her tiptoes to kiss L's cheek before turning to walk away. When his fingers clasped her hand tighter instead of letting go, she looked back at him.

"Lily, before you go, I'd like to introduce you to the Japanese Task Force," he said, leading her over to the men occupying the two couches and chairs.

Lily glimpsed at each man in turn. Two of the men she recognized: Soichiro Yagami and Shuichi Aizawa. The last time she met these two men the circumstances had been equally awful. She had just killed her uncle, and they were conducting the investigation. Of course they were part of the Kira case. Murder investigations seemed to be their forte; or maybe their curse.

A lot more gray had appeared in Chief Yagami's dark hair since she had seen him last. Detective Aizawa looked angry, resentful even, to be here. His eyebrows met over his nose and his lips formed a thin white line.

"Hello again, Chief Yagami, Detective Aizawa," she greeted them, bowing in respect and to hide her embarrassment. She had been a different person, literally and figuratively, the first time she met them. Seeing them again proved to be disconcerting and humiliating for her, possibly for them as well.

"Sachiko?" Chief Yagami murmured. "Is that really you? Ryuzaki told us about you, but I never expected..." His words trailed off when he became unsure of what to say, fearing he had already said too much.

Not wanting to make him feel more ill at ease, she did not bother correcting him about her name. Light was right. She was still the same person no matter what she called herself. Once again she was reminded the hard way that there was no escaping her past.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, not knowing what else to say to him. He looked pale, his facial muscles tight with worry. What must he be thinking and feeling having witnessed his son's arrest for the crime of being Kira? "I'm sorry about everything, Chief Yagami."

"Me too," he mumbled under his breath, picking up his tea cup. The cup shuddered, spilling the greenish tinted liquid into the saucer. He decided to put the cup down instead of attempting to bring it to his mouth to drink.

L introduced her to the other men staring at her with open curiosity. Kanzo Mogi, a big muscular man who nodded and grunted in acknowledgement. Hideki Ide, a thin, grumpy man who looked extremely irritated nodded when acquainted with her. Hirokazu Ukita, one of the younger members of the group with black hair shaved almost down to his scalp and black eyes full of suspicion as they studied Lily. The youngest member of the task force, Touta Matsuda gaped at her, his cheeks reddening when she bowed to him.

"I'll be leaving now," she announced to them. She could not very well say 'nice to meet you' because under the circumstances it was not.

A faint buzz invaded her ears warning her she might faint if she did not have food soon. On the way to her bedroom, Lily went through the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and an orange. Her headache was worsening.

Closing the door behind her, she locked it before tossing her purse on the bed. Digging her fingers into the orange, she peeled it, piling the discarded peels onto a tissue on the nightstand. The fresh, clean scent of the orange filled her nose and cleared a little of the fuzziness from her head. Opening the water, she took several sips to re-hydrate herself. Another bottle of water or two after this one and a decent dinner should counteract the lingering side effects of the powerful drug Light had given her.

After finishing her snack, Lily scooted to the middle of the bed, opening her purse. She took out the notebooks. Laying the Death Note on top of the diary, her trembling fingers traced each silver letter. How could mere paper hold the power of death? The face of Itachi Okada came to mind followed by a flash of the terrifying Ryuk's visage. How could she disbelieve the power it contained after other unexplainable events she had experienced?

"Are you going to write Light's name in the Death Note?" Ryuk asked her, appearing at the foot of her bed. "You can you know."

"No," she answered pointedly, sliding it under the other notebook. Light's Diary. She had a sneaking suspicion more gut wrenching horror awaited her in these pages. Setting the notebooks on the bed beside her, she reclined on her pillows to stare at the ceiling to avoid seeing the leering Shinigami with the Glasgow smile.

"Aren't you tempted at all?" he taunted her, emitting a raspy chuckle. "I know you want to write his name. To get it over with. If you killed Light, so many of your problems would be solved. Just think, the biggest threat to your beloved detective's life would be gone. It would be so easy. All you have to do is write Light's name in that notebook."

"What do you want, Ryuk?" she inquired, growing weary of his enticement to get her to use the Death Note. The worst part was that she found herself wanting to write Light's name in the notebook.

"Do you have any apples?"

"What?" She sat up, propping herself on her elbows to stare at him in disbelief of his simple request. "Apples?"

"I love apples. Give me two apples, and I'll leave you alone," he bargained.

"Fine," she sighed, getting out of the bed.

Lily opened the door, craning her neck around the door jamb to see the men in the sitting room. They were locked in intense conversation. Chief Yagami was no longer pale and forlorn. His bulging eyes along with his reddened skin stretched over the contours of his skull transforming his face into a terrifying mask of anger. The way he looked reminded her of the Oni mask L had bought the night of the festival.

Ducking down as if making herself shorter would also make her invisible, she moved as fast as she could in a waddle-walk to traverse the small open space between her door and the raised kitchen area. Shielded by the counters, she waddled to the refrigerator, opening it to take two apples out for the Shinigami. On her way back to her room, she could make out a few angry statements yelled by Soichiro Yagami.

"Arrest me if you have to! Charge me with hindering an investigation! I don't care! I can't stand idly by while - "

Lily closed the door to block out the sound of his enraged and equally distraught voice. She wondered how he could still believe in his son's innocence. Perhaps L had not shared the new information. Or maybe a parent's unconditional love was blinding him to the horrible truth.

"Did you get them?" Ryuk asked, hopping from one booted foot to the other like an excited but impatient child.

"Yeah. Here," she said, tossing one to him the way a dog owner tosses a ball to his loyal companion in the park.

Ryuk caught the first one in his massive mouth and the second in his hand when she lobbed it at him soon after. He chewed only twice before swallowing the first apple with an audible gulp. Tossing the second into his huge oral cavity lined by a single row of shark like teeth, he savored it only slightly more before swallowing.

"Why are you still here?" she demanded when he turned his vermilion irises on her.

"See ya later, Sassypants," he snickered, gradually fading away.

Lily slumped against the door taking several deep breaths to reduce her rapid heartbeat. Sometimes she could really be full of bullshit and bluster. She did not want to see him again anytime soon. Everything about him terrified her.

Her heart had slowed a bit but thumped against her sternum with almost painful force. She could hear her pulse booming in her ears which intensified her throbbing headache. Perhaps a long nap was in order to soothe her frazzled nerves.

Lily slid the Death Note and diary into the drawer of the table beside her bed before laying her aching head down into the fluffy softness of her pillows. Her brain ached, pulsating until she thought her skull might split.

Lily curled into the fetal position, squeezing her eyes closed and covering her ears with her hands as if that would shut out the tumult inside her head. A burning sensation started in the center of her chest radiating to her left arm. Her left arm ached like a toothache in response to the steady electric jolts of pain from her heart. Her teeth ground against each other as if a screw had been twisted to draw the upper and lower jaw bones together.

The fire in her chest grew as if gasoline had been thrown on it. Must be an increase in stomach acid from mixing with the citric acid of the orange. The heat seared her soft internal organs making her feel as if her guts were catching on fire. Never before had she experienced such an epic case of heartburn. This called for antacid and lots of it; a handful of chalky, chewable tablets or a half a bottle of the equally gross liquid. Surely there must be something the bathroom cabinet.

Lily stood up, stumbling toward the bathroom. Her constricted chest prevented her from inhaling a cleansing breath. Dizziness brought on by her rapid, shallow breathing forced her to her knees. Her upper body fell forward, crashing face first into the carpet at the threshold leading into the bathroom. Her forehead barely missed smacking the tile floor.

Then she realized something was incredibly wrong. Indigestion was not her problem. Her problem was much, much worse. She was having a heart attack.


	37. Bitter Ends and Surprising Beginnings

Rem closed her Death Note after writing the woman's name. Lily White; she went by another name but either one would do the job. The Shinigami extended her hand to brush her skeletal fingers through Misa's silken blond hair. She loved her and would do anything for her including killing that woman to hurt the two men who were hurting Misa.

Light Yagami did not love her Misa. The only reason Rem had not killed him was because Misa loved that wretched man with all of her heart. Misa saw him as a hero of mythic proportions for murdering the criminal who killed her parents. Light writing that particular man's name in his Death Note was pure accident; a cosmic travesty that their path's would cross in such a way. However in Misa's mind, he had done it for her, just for her specifically, and she loved him for it. Killing him was not an option because it would destroy Misa. Knowing how he felt about Lily White would devastate her as well.

L, that damned detective, had terrified and bound the woman she loved. Seeing Misa cry ripped her heart open. He would continue to torture her for who knows how long if Rem did not do something to save her. She would make him feel her pain by hurting the woman he loved.

Rem waited for her end to come. She knew what was coming because she had watched Gelus die. Gelus was the Shinigami who had saved Misa from certain death at the hand of a crazed stalker by writing his name in his Death Note. It was Gelus's notebook that Rem had given to her enabling Misa to become the second Kira, emulating her hero.

"Good-bye, Misa," Rem said.

"What do you mean good-bye?" Misa asked, looking around despite being unable to see due to the blindfold covering her eyes.

"I'll be leaving you now." If Rem could cry, she would.

"Rem? Rem! Where are you going?" she squeaked, panicked and afraid, more so than when she had been blindfolded and kidnapped.

"I love you."

Giving her life was a small price to pay to enact her own vengeance on the men hurting Misa. Light Yagami and L would know her unbearable pain when they experienced the broken heart of losing someone they loved.

Suddenly, Rem found herself in a dark place. Misa was gone. Was this what happened when a Shinigami dies? She had expected something different.

Suddenly, she was struck from behind across the back of her head. Her lanky, bony body lurched forward. She did not feel pain, but she did feel an unexpected rush of terror stemming from the murderous intent directed toward her.

Swinging her bandage ensconced head around, she saw him with her one good eye: Crow, the servant of Yatagarasu. Ryuk had warned her about writing Lily White's name in her Death Note. Crow meddled in the affairs of that one particular human, and Yatagarasu gave him extra leeway, allowing him to interfere with the Shinigami on her behalf.

The small figure standing in front of her appeared incapable of inflicting harm. Yet she found him imposing because his lethal attitude leaked from him in perceptible waves as obvious as the black leather crow mask on his face.

"Why did you bring me here?" Rem asked, angry that this was her fate instead of simply ceasing to exist. Her heart still ached for Misa. The love she felt choked her like a noose around her neck. She did not anticipate a slow miserable death.

"There's something I need to say to you before you are gone," he said. "It's about Lily White."

"If you brought me here to plead for her life, it's too late. Surely she's dead by now," she said, not remorseful in the slightest. Her only regret about dying was that she would no longer be near Misa. "I did what I had to do to protect Misa. You should understand, Crow."

"I do. That is why she will not die today. The sacrifice you have made was all for nothing," he informed her.

"What?" she gasped, her single eye widening.

Crow raised his cane close to her face. The shiny brass end glowed red like an ember in a fire. The brightness and heat intensified until it was blinding and hot as the sun. That heavenly luminescence would burn her to ash in a matter of seconds when he unleashed it on her full force.

"I'm dying too Rem because I gave my life to save someone I love. It's just a longer more painful process for me," he explained.

"I don't understand. She is already dead," Rem reminded him.

"Obviously you have forgotten the god I serve. Lily may die, but she will live again. You, however, will not. Farewell, Shinigami."

Before Rem could utter the word 'no' resting on her tongue, there was a flash of light snuffing out her existence in this and any other world.

~~~\\\/~~~

No comforting white light enveloped her. No burning flames of hell seared her eyes or body. The illumination of either otherworldly realm would have been welcome in this darker than dark place. Her parents were not waiting for her with open arms for a sentimental family reunion in the afterlife. Nothing but darkness, cold, and isolation greeted her.

Lily recognized this place. She had here here before. She wanted to scream for help, but she feared no one would come.

"You need to come back," a gentle, familiar voice coaxed her. "It's not your time yet."

Lily inhaled, a deep wheezing breath, when her heart began beating again. Her eyes popped open to meet a pair of bottomless black orbs.

"Welcome back," Itachi Okada greeted her in his human form. He was sitting on the floor where she lost consciousness, holding her in his lap.

Multiple deep lines were etched into the fair skin at the outer corners of his eyes that was once smooth and flawless. The folds of skin from the edges of his nostrils down the corners of his mouth had deepened giving him an aged look. Itachi Okada no longer appeared to be a twenty something year old man. He looked to be every day of forty and possibly then some.

"You're aging like a human. You really are dying," Lily murmured, pressing her palm to his cheek.

"I was never meant to stay with you forever," he rejoined.

"You can't die. You're the only one who's been there for me since my parents died," she said, tears pooling in her eyes.

"I know. I shouldn't have allowed you to become so dependent on me. I have already stayed with you longer than I should have. I gave you this for when I'm gone." He grasped her shoulder where he had implanted the three feathers.

"Ow!" she exclaimed, a searing pain coursing through her shoulder as if he had touched her with fire.

Lily stood up with his assistance, going into the bathroom. Pulling up the sleeve of the t-shirt, she examined the 'tattoo' he had given her. One of the white feathers had turned black, looking more like a typical tattoo.

"These are three lives?" she inquired, dropping the sleeve.

Itachi Okada shrugged. "Kind of. They can also be likened to wishes as well. The life you save does not have to be your own, but it does take away one of the feathers. Be careful. You now have one less chance of surviving another unexpected, supernatural brush with death."

"Supernatural brush with death? Like surviving a heart attack after my name is written in a Death Note?" she questioned him. "Who did it? Ryuk?"

"No. Misa Amane's Shinigami, Rem. Unlike Ryuk, Rem is capable of love. She sincerely loved Misa and was completely loyal to her. She perceived you as a threat so she tried to get rid you," he explained. "She gave her life to protect Misa."

"Shinigami's can die?" Lily never imagined a Death god could die. It seemed like a cruel celestial joke. But she was learning not all unearthly beings were immortal or invulnerable.

"A Shinigami can die. If they fall in love with a human, then write down another human's name to save them, that Shinigami will die. They've broken two of the Shinigami rules. Falling in love with a human and misusing their Death Note for personal gain."

"Is that why you're dying?"

"Mmmm," he hummed thoughtfully searching for the correct words to explain it. "Not really. It's more of a life for a life. An equivalent exchange kind of thing. Comparing myself to a Shinigami is like comparing apples and oranges."

"Funny you should use that analogy," she mumbled.

"What do you mean?" he asked, the furrows on his forehead folding together like an accordion.

"Nothing."

"You are free to use these gifts however you choose. But remember, everything has a price."

Lily sighed. She was painfully aware there was a price to be paid for saving a life. Her eyes scanned his tired, haggard face. A higher price for some than others. She hugged him tightly.

"Thank you, Itachi Okada. Thank you for being the friend...the father...I needed," she whispered. Her arms tightened around him, squeezing him like she would never him go. "I love you."

~~~\\\/~~~

"I love you, too," he responded, burying his face into her hair so she could not see his tears.

Itachi Okada had a secret. He was a reincarnation of her father, Daichi Sugiyama. As much as he wanted to confess his true identity, he could never tell her or risk cursing her. He had been sworn to secrecy by Yatagarasu who had given him a second chance, to avenge his wife and save his daughter.

After his death, Daichi had found himself in a barren pit of isolation. He was angry, frightened, and confused. He had died with too many regrets, too much rage, and too much unfinished business. The main reason he could not go on to the afterlife yet was his daughter Sachiko. She had been left in the hands of a monster.

Yatagarasu took pity on him, granting him a rebirth, transforming him into a whole new creature. Therefore, a man became a lesser god, a servant, allowing him to return to his daughter. She would never know her father had come back to her. Sometimes a blessing comes with a curse.

Tears streamed down his cheeks as he held his daughter, possibly for the last time before he died a second death. His days were much fewer in number now if he had any left all. He wanted to tell her the truth, that Daddy was with her. To keep his vow and protect her from further misfortune, he continued to pretend to be Itachi Okada, a benevolent, divine stranger who had accidentally stumbled into her life to become her guardian angel.

~~~\\\/~~~

"Lily?" L called from the other side of her bedroom door. The door knob jiggled and clacked when he attempted to open the door.

Lily gasped, opening her eyes. She was hugging nothing but air with tears streaming down her face.

"Lily, open the door!" L demanded, banging on it.

"Just a minute!" she exclaimed, dashing into the bathroom. She splashed cold water on her face to wash away her tears. The coolness soothed her stinging eyes. Patting her face dry with a towel, she rushed to the door to open it before L beat it down.

"Why was the door locked?" He entered the room and closed it behind him, locking it again.

"I was trying to take a nap. I'm really tired so if you don't mind..." She tried to push him toward the door, but he did not budge an inch. He might look like a pushover, but he was anything but. She could feel L's large, observant eyes on her. He was staring at her as if he was seeing her for the first time. "What?"

"What the hell happened to you? You look like death warmed over," he muttered, placing his hand on her cheek. "You're so cold. Are you okay?"

"As a matter of fact - " Her words were cut off when his mouth covered hers. Lily sighed, sinking into his arms that enveloped her and melting into his body. Soaking in his warmth, reveling in his kiss, she suddenly felt more alive than she ever had before.

"I don't know what I would have done if something had happened to you," L whispered in her ear, coming close to squeezing the life out of her again he held her so tightly.

Lily decided against telling him she had just come back to life. Some things he did not need to know for his own good. Hopefully neither one of them would have to know the pain of losing the other. She was tired of losing the people she loved.

"L, how do you feel about me?" she questioned him, giving him a peck on the lips.

"What do you mean?" he returned, genuinely befuddled.

"I mean...I love you...and?"

"And?" He had no idea what he was supposed to say.

If she had to drag the four letter L word out of him, she would rather him not say it at all. One day he would say it to her on his own. Knowing he sincerely loved her without doubting his emotions or being suspicious of ulterior motives was better than hearing a meaningless phrase over and over.

"There's something I need you to see," L said, taking her by the hand to lead her out of the room. "About an hour ago Misa Amane started acting weird. She was talking to herself, calling out the name Rem. She began crying and hasn't stopped yet. I want your opinion on the matter"

"Rem," she muttered. She knew why Misa was crying. How can she make an analytical mind understand the illogical concept of a Shinigami?

L pulled Lily over to the computers, cuing up the video of Misa. She dropped heavily into the chair, gaping at the screen. Her belly tightened, heat and nausea flooded her system when she saw the woman tied up like an S&M wet dream in a straight jacket and metal straps with futuristic blinders over her eyes to block out her vision.

"What the hell is this?" Lily demanded. "Does she really have to be tied up like that?"

"I didn't ask you criticize my restraint techniques. Listen," he instructed her, turning up the volume because Misa was speaking in a whisper.

Then Lily saw the Shinigami the woman was speaking to. Rem was tall and skinny like Ryuk, but literally all bone. She resembled a skeletal mummy with large, sharp protrusions of bone jutting from her shoulders and hips. Her arms were like backbones including the projections called a spinous process extending from each disc. Her hair looked like white dreads with purple ends. Purple lines extended down from her purple lips and disappeared under her hair toward her ears on which hung large gold hoop earrings. She was not absolutely repugnant like Ryuk.

"Misa is speaking to a Shinigami," Lily told L, preparing herself for his dubious rebuttal.

"A what? Are you feeling well? Is this some sort of joke?" he inquired irritably.

"A Death god. They're attached to the Death Notes," she tried to explain.

"I'm calling a doctor," he muttered, picking up his phone in his strange, prissy way between his thumb and forefinger.

"No, don't," she snapped, slapping the phone out of his hand. "I already have a psychologist."

"That's who I was calling. I read your file," he reminded her.

"I'm not crazy."

"Are you sure?"

"Are _you_ crazy?" she retorted acerbically. "I'm sure you've seen some weird shit. Hang on, and I'll prove it to you.

Lily returned her attention on the screen. She swallowed repeatedly to dissolve the lump that formed in her throat as she watched the Shinigami write her name in the notebook which had induced the fatal heart attack she suffered. Her hand went to her chest, massaging the area over her heart.

 _"Good-bye, Misa,"_ the Shinigami said, her voice deep but vaguely feminine.

 _"What do you mean good-bye?"_ Misa's head wagged from side to side as if she was looking for the Shinigami, although the blinders blocked her vision.

 _"I'll be leaving you now."_

Lily began to tear up. This conversation was agonizingly familiar.

 _"Rem? Rem! Where are you going?"_ Tears leaked from under the blindfold.

 _"I love you."_ Rem disappeared. No light show, no thunder, no drama. Just gone.

"Oh, my god," Lily gasped, covering her quivering lips with her hand.

"What ya watchin'?" Ryuk asked from behind her.

"Jesus Christ!" Lily screamed, jumping up from the chair.

"He can't help you now," the Shinigami laughed.

"What is wrong with you?" L asked, staring at her apprehensively. He reached for his phone, patting the desk in a blind search for it while keeping his eyes on her.

"I'll be right back," she murmured, running to her room. Retrieving the Death Note, she brought it back to L.

Ryuk was still standing behind her chair where she had left him.

"Here. Touch this." She held out the notebook to L, chewing her lower lip in anticipation of what would happen next.

"I don't see what - " L snatched the notebook away from her. "Whoa! A Shinigami!" he screeched, falling out of his chair. He stared up at the Shinigami who bent over him to get a better look at the unusual, abnormally wide-eyed human lying on the floor.

"This is Ryuk. Light's Shinigami." Lily presented the Death god to him in an unnecessarily formal manner. "Ryuk, I'm sure you have already met L several times, he just didn't know it."

"Why can't I see the other one? Rem?" L picked himself up from the floor, dusting off his behind as if to rid himself of the embarrassment suffered by his extreme reaction to the Shinigami.

"You have to touch her Death Note," Ryuk explained, startling L again by speaking.

This time his response was less violent. He flinched away and blinked before regaining control of himself.

"Where is it? You have to have it," Lily said.

"How can you see her?" L questioned her.

"That's a story for another day." She did not feel like getting into the much longer explanation of Itachi Okada whom he had met before.

L went to his room, bringing back an evidence box. Ripping off the lid, he rifled through the contents, withdrawing a plastic bag containing a black leather bound book with symbols or a foreign language presumably spelling out Death Note on the cover. He pressed a button on his keyboard, rewinding the video. Reaching into the bag, he gingerly touched the corner of the notebook.

Lily watched him as he saw Rem for the first time. It never ceased to amaze her how his already big eyes could open even wider. She contemplated if there was a possibility they could one day open so wide his eyeballs would fall out. If he received too many more surprises like this one, it could very well happen. Those inhumanly large eyes turned to gaze at her.

"You knew about this? You've been able to see them for a while?" he asked her.

"Not for too long, but I think I'm getting used to it."

"Getting used to it? How have you not lost your shit?"

Lily laughed, loud and hard. She adored his forthrightness. He did not normally curse either so she knew he had to be really freaked out.

"It's not easy. Believe me," she sighed, casting a sidelong glimpse at Ryuk.

L grabbed her, kissing her forcefully on the mouth. The kiss was possessive but not domineering seeking to control and overpower her. He was conveying his love, expressing a desire to give her comfort and seeking his own from her.

"You're amazing, and I love you," he panted, breathless from the kiss or maybe from an impending anxiety attack.

"Oh, now you say it!" she snapped indignantly. "I swear L, you have to be the most infuriating human being I've ever known!"

"Takes one to know one," he retorted, pressing his lips to hers gently.

"Ew!" Ryuk muttered. "You humans can be disgusting."

"Get lost, Ryuk," she commanded him.

"You don't have to tell me twice." He immediately took his leave.

"I have a meeting with the Task Force in an hour," L told her.

"What are you doing for the next hour? Oh!" she squealed when L picked her up into a Princess carry. To look at him she would have never guessed he was strong enough to pick her up.

"I'm sure we can think of something."

An hour of intimate private time with L. Wishes do come true.


	38. The Death of the god

Lily waited patiently behind Watari as he typed in the code on the numeric keypad by the solid metal door to unlock Light's cell. A beep followed by a mechanical whir signaled the locks had disengaged. Watari pulled on the handle that reminded her of the one on the walk in cooler at the bakery. The heavy door swung open slowly. She took a deep breath and entered the small, windowless room with a plate of food and a bottle of water held in her hands. Once inside, the door closed behind her and locked with a click.

Light, hands still cuffed behind his back, knelt in the middle of the room on the marble floor. Foregoing the comfort of sitting on the thick pad on the metal cot or even on the wooden chair in the corner made him appear to be such a martyr. His chin rested on his chest in the manner of a contrite man.

Lily seriously doubted he regretted one single murder he committed. He would not be wallowing in shame or guilt. She was convinced he was plotting his miraculous escape from his imprisonment. Good luck with that, Light.

"I brought your dinner," Lily announced when he did not look up. She purposely crossed the room right in front of him, setting the plate and bottle of water on the seat of the chair.

"How am I supposed to eat with my hands cuffed?" he inquired when she sat down on the cot behind him.

"What? You're not hiding a handcuff key somewhere on you?" she asked cattily. "Come on, Houdini. Show me one of your amazing escapes. Impress me."

"Are you going to take these off or not?" he shot back with equal spite, rattling the metal restraints.

"Come closer, and I will," she said, removing the key from the pocket of her stretchy white pants.

Light exhaled noisily; obviously frustrated, hopefully humiliated. He shimmied backwards on his knees, leaning forward to extend his hands back to her.

"What's it like, Light? To no longer to be in a position to manipulate and control others? It must be horribly difficult for you," she cooed in mock sympathy. A hateful smile curled her lips when he grunted like a crabby old man in return.

Lily took him by the wrist, sliding the small key into the tiny lock on the cuffs. She removed the handcuffs and tossed them onto the mattress of the cot.

"Is this my last meal?" he inquired, picking up the plate and bottle to sit in the chair.

"Don't be so dramatic," she snapped. "But I will admit, it's not looking good for you, Light. There's no way out of this."

"There's always a way," he muttered, cutting off a large piece of the steak.

As if on cue, Ryuk materialized in the room, standing across the room from Light. He held his Death Note and a pen in his hands.

Lily pretended not to see the Shinigami despite being profoundly aware of his presence. She kept her eyes on Light while he casually savored his meal. Even at a time like this, he was still confident he held the upper hand, that he would some how charm his way, or more likely, kill his way out of this predicament.

"You're not going to win here," she warned him, anger boiling under her calm demeanor.

"I always win," he mumbled through a mouthful of food.

"This isn't a game!" she screamed, jumping to her feet. "But this is over! _You are done_!"

Light launched himself out of the chair. His bare feet hit the floor without a sound, but the plate fell and shattered on the cold marble with a crash. He lunged at her, one hand seizing her right wrist to keep her from striking him. His other hand went to her throat, his fingers digging in to the sides of her neck to clutch her. Holding on to her, he pushed her backwards across the floor into the wall.

Lily shrieked when her head hit the metal wall with a bang. Stars flickered in front of her eyes while excruciating pain inundated her brain. Although her eyes wanted to close to block out the bursts of white light, her own personal fireworks show in her head including the pounding explosions, she forced them to stay open to observe his face.

The true monster he had kept hidden inside for so long stood in front of her: his face ugly, distorted. His eyes bulged from their sockets, bloody lines marring the whites giving a reddish cast to the brown irises. White, foamy spittle flew from between his clenched teeth while he strained to choke the life out of her by applying crushing pressure to her windpipe using his palm.

"I thought you preferred to keep the physical element out of your killing, wielding your god-like powers to keep your physical hands clean while making your metaphorical hands filthy and destroying your soul," she choked, glaring at him hotly while he tried to strangle her.

Light relaxed his hand, allowing her to breathe. Her mouth dropped opened gulping in air.

"Since I'm going down, I'm taking you down with me," he snarled, his eyes moving to the right of her where the Shinigami stood at the ready with his notebook. His burning crimson-brown eyes returned to her face, narrowing with rage and boring into hers. "The saddest part is I really loved you. You were going to be my goddess. We could have had it all."

"I want no part of your madness. Or you," she added, snarling at him. A gasp pushed past her lips when he reapplied the forceful pressure to her windpipe. Then he let up again just as quickly.

"As pleasurable as it would be to kill you with my bare hands, I can't."

Lily scoffed. A chuckle built deep in her chest, bubbling upwards until it tumbled out of her mouth. The inordinate giggle usually uttered only by those touched in the head made Light flinch, making him draw back from her slightly but keeping his hand pressed gently to her neck.

"You're caught anyway. Does it matter? Kill me if you dare."

"Ryuk, write her name," Light commanded the Shinigami.

"Light, I - " Ryuk attempted to protest.

"Do it!" he bellowed, so enraged at this point his face turned red.

Lily closed her eyes when she heard the scratching of the writing implement against the paper. Not again. She steeled herself for the inevitable pain. The dread of dying crushed her lungs as if a tourniquet had been tied around her chest.

Suddenly the light pressure on her throat slackened further. Light's hand fell away from her neck entirely, gliding down her chest. Her eyes flew open to see him stumbling back from her with his hand pressed to his heart. Her attention diverted to the Death god who was sliding his notebook back into the pouch hanging at his hip.

"Ryuk, what did you do?" she asked him despite already knowing full well what he had done.

"You," Light wheezed, dropping onto the cot. "You know about him?"

"I've been able to see him for a while. I also stole your Death Note," she informed the stricken man, noting that his eyelids separated further transforming his expression from shock to pure terror.

Lily laughed. A cruel, harsh sound, more nasty and spiteful than her earlier giggle. The bitter, barking laugh bounced off the shiny steel walls and back to her ears making her cringe from the viciousness therein.

"You didn't know? You _really_ didn't know I had found the notebook?" she questioned Light incredulously. How could he be acting at a time like this? He was having a heart attack. He was hopelessly trapped in the mess he had made, and dying.

"I didn't tell him you knew about me," Ryuk interjected. "I also didn't tell him you took the Death Note."

"How could you betray me like this?" he asked Ryuk. "I am a god."

"You are no god to me," the Death god responded bluntly. "In the realms of gods and men, you are only a god among men. To the gods, you are no longer even human. You are nothing."

"Why?" Light sputtered, coughing convulsively. "Did you fall in love with her?"

"Don't be stupid," Ryuk snorted disdainfully. "This woman is under the direct protection of a god. A _real_ god. A god who would take my life if I killed her. A life for a life. Sorry, Light," he chuckled in a rather sinister way. "I wasn't about to write her name in my Death Note for you. Above all things, I value my own life no matter how pathetic you think it may be. Apparently you forgot I'm more of a god than you were ever capable of being."

"But I held the power...the power of death...in my hands," he wheezed, laying back on the cot. His feet dangled several inches above the floor, twitching as death began plucking at the few delicate threads of life he held onto with grim determination.

"You were nothing more than a deluded fool relying on borrowed power. I am a true Death god," Ryuk proclaimed, the slightest hint of pride in his throaty voice.

The door to the cell opened. Soichiro Yagami rushed in, his face pale and sickly looking. He went to the bed, gathering his dying son in his arms. He kissed his boy's forehead, holding him close in his last few moments of life.

Lily averted her eyes, rushing out of the door. There was no reason for her to stay. She had completed her task as assigned. She feared watching Light's final moments, observing his father's unbearable grief would be more than her sanity could take.

Her brain pulsated inside her skull as much from the hit her head had taken as from the emotions she attempted to hold at bay. She ran past the basement elevator, choosing to run up the stairs despite the many flights ahead of her.

She pumped her arms and forced her legs to move no matter how much the muscles burned to flee from the demons of lunacy chasing her. Despite everything that had happened, she had not yet lost her rationality and did not want to do so since the final sad end to this catastrophe had come.

Lily burst into the suite, surprising the men gathered in the sitting room watching the tragedy unfolding on the monitors. Ignoring them, she sped through the living area to reach the balcony where she continued straight to the small plot of comforting green space; a place to hide from the craziness around her to gather up the scattered scraps of her own sanity.

Then her saving grace arrived. Itachi Okada hugged her to his chest with paternal infection.

"I've come to say good-bye," he whispered in her ear.

"I should have known," she sobbed, curling her fingers into his white shirt. "You've picked the worst possible time to leave me. But somehow it's appropriate."

"The timing was not my choosing I assure you. I am sorry, truly sorry, my dear," he apologized, holding her while he still could to offer her all of the reassurance possible. "You'll be fine. You must continue to live. There is someone who needs you more than you ever needed me. Be strong and live. If not for yourself...then for them."

"What are you talking about?" she sniffled, hanging on to him tightly. She could feel his body disintegrating in her arms. He was leaving her. "No! You can't!"

"I love you," he murmured, his lips pressing a last kiss to her forehead.

"I love you too!" she cried out wanting him to hear her voice into the next plane of his existence.

Lily swayed unsteadily on her feet before her knees failed her, sending her straight down to the ground. Her legs folded underneath her but did not save her rear from receiving the full impact of hitting the concrete resulting in a jolt of pain racing up her spine from her battered tailbone. The physical pain did not faze her due to the agonizing pain in her heart.

Raising her head to the starless sky devoid of the light of even a mere sliver of the moon, she howled in mourning. She cried without holding back her grief, allowing herself to lament the death of Itachi Okada. She cried for Light and his father. What a terribly sad turn of events for Soichiro Yagami. Lastly, she cried for herself, grieving once and for all for the never was and never will be in her life.

Afterward, Lily lay in a whimpering, mewling heap curled on her side and shaking like a frightened child. A pair of large warm hands lifted her upper body, pulling her head onto a jean clad lap. The usually coarse fabric had been softened through wear. The heat of the flesh underneath seeped through the thick cotton material, warming her face cooled by the wind whipping around her on the rooftop. His smooth fingertips stroked her cheek and combed through her tangled hair.

"You will be all right. I would not have asked you do this if you were so easily broken," L said, his fingers tracing the long, finger shaped bruises on her neck.

"Was that meant to be a compliment?" she sniffed, wiping away a stray tear that leaked from her eye.

"I did not mean for things to happen this way. I only wanted a confession to strengthen the case. I pushed you too hard. I will admit that," he murmured humbly, apologizing in his typical round-about way.

"You didn't have to say you loved me or have sex with me to manipulate me into doing that. All you had to do was ask," she said, sitting up to look into his eyes.

"I told you I love you because I do. I made love to you because I wanted to," he said tonelessly in his low, breathy voice. He carefully grasped her shoulders, squeezing gently to keep from injuring her. His eyes searched hers for belief in his words. "I mean that."

Lily leaned forward, resting her head on his chest. His heart beat slow and steady under her ear. He must mean it since the confession did not raise his heart rate.

"Oh, L," she sighed, snuggling into him. "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know. I know it's shocking, even to me, but sometimes I don't have all the answers."

* * *

 _A few notes from the author..._

Okay everyone, as you can tell, this is the end. I hate endings, but this is it. Thank you all for reading and I hope you liked it.

At this point I'm debating on including a simple epilogue with this story or creating a whole off shoot story from this as to what happens afterward. Feel free to cast a vote or voice an opinion for which you prefer. I'm also considering another Beyond Birthday story. So as usual, tons of ideas, not enough hours in the day or energy in my mind and body to take care of it all.

I have a special thank you for xfang-girlx, my long time friend and sounding board who has listened to every rant and whine. helping me sort out ideas on lots of my stories and catching my typos on the fly. Also a shout out to marinaa007 for being a faithful reader and reviewer from beginning to end on this story. My appreciation to blackcat711 who read and reviewed this story and others as well. Thank you vampiregirliegirl, RomanticBlondie, zerom1v, hrlqnn, Stellar Nymph, Yatocat19, corneliapr, zikashigaku, and desertwolves. I appreciated each and every review, all of the honest opinions. With your help, your critiques and inspiration, I want to continue to write and improve the quality of my writing for you.


	39. Epilogue

Lily sat in the backseat of the Rolls Royce limousine fiddling with the hem of her plain black dress. Her eyes strayed to L who sat beside her reading something on the screen of his laptop. She assumed he was going over his final notes to submit to the Chief of Detectives on the Kira case.

They were on their way to funeral home for Light's wake. For reasons L could not understand therefore she did not try to explain, attending this mourning ritual for Light was important to her. She needed to say good-bye, to bid her final farewell. She wanted to let him go without holding on to any of the good memories. Although it would take time, she would make peace with the bad ones.

"We're here," L announced when the car pulled to a stop at the bottom of the stairs leading up to the funeral home.

Lily smoothed down her dress before taking Watari's hand for him to assist her out of the back seat. Taking a deep breath, she stared up the tall flight of cement stairs built into the side of the gradually sloping hill. She straightened her shoulders, held her head high, and started up the steps as if her legs were not as wobbly as gelatin.

At the top, a lengthy sidewalk led to the glass double door entrance of the building. She could see many people inside through the wall of windows on either side of the doors. Some people stood in small groups talking while others walked and back and forth in the entrance way.

Once inside, she saw a hallway extending in each direction. Small black signs with gold lettering on them sat outside each set of open doors along the wall. To her right she saw a directory in the foyer. There were a disturbing number of dead people listed. At last she found Light's name on the lengthy list.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" L asked her, touching her elbow to lead her down the right corridor.

"Yes," she exhaled, releasing her deep breath. "To be honest, I'm doing this for myself. I need this to grieve properly, to let him go and get him out of my head."

"I don't understand."

"I know. I just need you to be here for me."

"I can do that," he promised.

Lily stopped outside the doors beside the sign bearing Light's name. She turned to L, giving him an apologetic smile. If she were not so nervous, so distracted, she would have laughed when he cocked his head like a confused puppy.

"However, I think you should wait out here. It would be highly inappropriate for you to come in," she told him. Only slightly more inappropriate than her being here.

"I don't understand," he repeated, but dropped his arm from hers.

"Please, trust me," she implored him. "Wait for me."

Lily took her place in the line of people waiting at the altar bearing Light's framed picture and a plethora of white roses and fragrant white jasmine flowers. There were an inordinate number of young women in the long line waiting to pay their respects. Some were holding bouquets of red flowers to place on the altar to express their adoration for Light.

Lily wondered how many of the women were ex girlfriends. Some had probably been mere hopefuls while others were only unknown fans who admired him from afar. Possibly a stalker or two lurked in the crowd. Whatever they were, none of them knew what kind of hideous beast had been hidden under that beautiful exterior.

Lily involuntarily shivered in response to the frigid tingle that ran up her spine. She had loved him once too. At least they would remain blissfully unaware like the rest of the world that Light Yagami was the infamous mass murderer who terrorized the world.

L had concocted a story and fed it to the press and other police agencies to cover up Light's identity as Kira. The official documents detailed a story of how Light had died in the line of duty so to speak while trying to apprehend Kira whose 'real' name and face would remain unknown because the killer had supposedly died in a fire. L had even set fire to an abandoned warehouse to add further credibility and evidence, no matter how fabricated, to the case.

Allowing Light Yagami to die a hero was mostly to protect his family, especially Soichiro Yagami. The only policemen who knew the true identity of Kira were the members of the Kira Task Force. Misa had been committed to an asylum and heavily sedated, kept in a special wing all by herself. According to all news agencies, she was on extended holiday, tucked away in a secluded chateau in the south of France.

Large funeral arrangements sent from law enforcement agencies from around the world lined the wall in two rows behind the Yagami family. The grieving family members politely greeted each guest who mumbled their condolences. Soichiro Yagami looked withered and world weary. His dark eyes were as cold and hard as marbles. His hair appeared to have gone nearly completely gray over the last few weeks.

His wife, Sachiko, leaned heavily against him, occasionally dabbing her eyes with the white handkerchief in her hand. Her chocolate brown hair pulled into a bun did not contain a single gray strand. Although her brown eyes were sad, they still appeared to be warm and kind. Lily remembered when Light's eyes had looked like that.

Sayu, his sister, stood beside her mother. Her features resembled Light's but her hair and eyes were slightly darker, almost black, like her father's. Shell shocked, not sure what to think or feel, she remained emotionless, staring blindly ahead of her with vacant, tearless eyes. She never spoke a word to any guest, only nodded and bowed in a robotic manner.

Lily found herself in front of the altar at last. She gazed at Light's picture, resisting the urge to reach out to touch his face in the photograph. He was smiling, those sweet brown eyes so full of innocence and tenderness. Her throat constricted to contain the sorrow and anger swirling inside of her, bringing tears to eyes and an old familiar ache to her heart.

She knelt at the altar, lighting one of the incense sticks before stabbing it into the tray of sand holding dozens of other sticks. Thin wisps of white smoke twirled into the air to disappear. Despite her reluctance to believe in any god anymore, she sent up a small prayer to whoever might be listening.

Getting to her feet, Lily went to the family. Standing in front of Soichiro Yagami, her brain failed immediately when his dead eyes met hers and erupted into searing flames of hatred. Not only did the words flee from her mind, her ability to speak deserted her as well. As if sensing her discomfort and the animosity in her husband's glare, Sachiko took her hand.

"Thank you for coming today, dear. You were a friend of Light's?" she asked, holding Lily's hand.

Lily swallowed, trying to find her voice. Her name had been Sachiko too. She was supposed to have dinner with his family, to meet his parents, to meet the woman who shared her name. But instead her whole life descended into hell the night before that could happen. Light could have stopped it - could of stopped her uncle - but he did not. He was too damn concerned about getting caught to save her so she had been forced to save herself.

"We were friends in high school," she answered. There was no need to try explain her true affiliation with the woman's son. "I wish I had other words to say, but I am so- "

Before she could finish the word they had heard hundreds of times already, Sochiro Yagami slapped her forcefully across the face. Lily stumbled backwards, pressing her hand to her injured cheek that burned as if boiling hot oil had been thrown in her face.

"Soichiro!" Sachiko shrieked in astonishment. She grabbed her husband's arm, tugging on him imploringly when he stepped forward, hand drawn back, ready to slap Lily again. "What's wrong with you?"

"You should not have come here," he snarled at Lily, spittle flying from between his gritted teeth.

Lily felt a pair of strong hands grasping her upper arms. Her head whipped to the side, and she saw Detective Shuichi Aizawa standing behind her.

"You should leave," he suggested, firmly but kindly, turning her toward the door. He placed his body between her and his irate boss.

As Lily fled to the door, her hand covering her stinging cheek, she heard Soichiro Yagami break down into howling sobs. Her steps quickened when she exited the room. Ignoring a startled L who called out to her when she ran past him, she hurried away.

"Lily, stop," L ordered her.

Lily did not stop until they were out of the building and away from the people. She closed her eyes when L's strong, thin fingers enclosed her wrist to pull her back into his arms.

"Please, don't say anything. I know I shouldn't have come. I don't blame him for reacting that way. I suppose I deserve it actually," she said, turning to press her face into L's soft white t-shirt.

"I just received a call," he said, changing the subject entirely. "I'm needed on another case. I have to go to the United States. New Orleans, Louisiana. I'm afraid a part of my past might be coming back to haunt me."

"I know a lot about that," she murmured, putting her arms around his waist.

"I have to leave tonight," he informed her.

Lily's heart dropped into her belly like a rock with a painful thud. Over the last month they had not had time to think about the future because the present required too much of their time and attention. L had been too busy tying up the dozens of frayed ends created by the Kira case. She had been occupied reconciling her involvement in the Kira case, in addition to dealing with the bakery and what was left of the life and possessions of the man named Itachi Okada.

Lily had no idea if their future would be together or separate because their plans for each other had not been discussed. She had not even come up with a plan for herself, having to start over once again after being forced to close yet another chapter of her life. Obviously, L would continue to be a preeminent detective with a next case waiting to be solved. But what about her?

Lily hugged L tightly, pressing her face into his chest. She did not want to let him go. She did not want to be without him, but she did not know if she belonged in his life.

"Come with me," he whispered in her ear.

"What? I can't," she scoffed, backing up to see his face. His eyes moved back and forth between hers as if searching for the reason.

"Well, why not?" he asked incredulously. "You have no friends, no family. You cut ties with the bakery because you did not want to draw any unnecessary attention to the Tanakas or your friends there. You've sold Okada's house and all of his possessions. Why stay here? Come with me."

As usual, everything he said had been completely valid, voiding her argument in only a few words.

"And do what? Be your assistant? Your personal baker? Your lover?" she snorted derisively.

"You were already all of those things. Weren't you?" he inquired in the open and innocent manner usually reserved for children and not found in grown men. But he was definitely not the typical man lest she forget. "Who knows what else you can be. You can discover that for yourself...with me."

"All right then. I'll go with you, and be - " She was not sure what to say next, how to classify herself.

L pulled her back into his arms, kissing her lips gently.

"Just be mine. You'll figure the rest as we go along."

* * *

I felt the story needed a more conclusive ending yet I've left it open to write a sequel...just in case. :)


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